All the lines that Zhao Benshan used to charge extravagantly for his early sketches must be collected! Urgent need!

New Year greetings

Performers: Zhao Benshan, Gao Xiumin, Fan Wei

Zhao Benshan: What are you pulling?

Gao Xiumin: Why are you so slow?

Zhao Benshan: So fast, can I still fly?

Gao Xiumin: Are you worried? Our fish pond is about to expire, and the township chief's brother-in-law is anxious. He wants to take over the contract. Is it okay if we don't talk to the township chief about such a big matter?

Zhao Benshan: It’s useless to talk now that it’s expired!

Gao Xiumin: Let’s fight for it in the end!

Zhao Benshan: You are too stingy to fight for this Chinese New Year. It is embarrassing to lead two bastards.

Gao Xiumin: As for relying on me, I won’t take either of them.

Zhao Benshan: What are you going to get?

Gao Xiumin: It’s not fashionable to give gifts now. It’s all about communicating with emotions.

Zhao Benshan: Zhagou?

Gao Xiumin: Use words and say something nice.

Zhao Benshan: It’s over. Let me play fish pond and let me play with languages.

Gao Xiumin: What is the comparison?

Zhao Benshan: You can’t find the North Pole even if you go to the South Pole with a blind pestle. You can’t split your legs even if you have a cerebral thrombosis. You can’t see the beauty of a monkey wearing a cheongsam. You asked Pan Changjiang to kiss Zheng Haixia. Can't even reach my mouth.

Gao Xiumin: I said you, you, you are doing this useless thing. Old man, listen to me. Let’s stop talking about things when we enter the house. We should wear Gao for him vigorously. Hats off, say a few more words of New Year greetings. As long as the mayor is happy, the communication will be almost the same.

Zhao Benshan: People wearing high hats just give you fun?

Gao Xiumin: Well, let alone the head of a foreign town, he would be happy even if the president put a high hat on him, de Gaulle!

Zhao Benshan: Oh~

Gao Xiumin: Knock on the door

Zhao Benshan: Oh, I am afraid of meeting the leader~~~

Gao Xiumin: You Remember, don't talk about anything when you enter the house. Act according to my eyes.

Zhao Benshan: Yes, you can knock on it~

Fan Wei: Oh, you are back~~~~You are

Gao Xiumin: I am your aunt ,

Fan Wei: Old lady?

Gao Xiumin: Ah, we used to be from the same family, fellow villagers. Xiaomi raised you, and your beard is full of stories. Have you remembered?

Fan Wei: Which family are you from?

Gao Xiumin: The Gao family in Dongtou is the first gatekeeper. It has three large tile-roofed houses, and my father Gao Mantang lives in the house.

Zhao Benshan: Nicknamed Tall Maozi!

Fan Wei: Ouch~is this?

Gao Xiumin: He is my old man.

Zhao Benshan: Gao Da Maozi is my uncle, no, I am his father’s father-in-law, no, his father is my father-in-law, we are the first couple.

Gao Xiumin: Township chief, if you were to discuss it here, you would still have to call him uncle! Come and get to know each other.

Zhao Benshan: Old uncle~Happy New Year~

Gao Xiumin: On the contrary, he calls you old uncle.

Zhao Benshan: Haha

Gao Xiumin: Hahahahahahahahaha

Fan Wei: Haha

Zhao Benshan: Are you letting in?

Fan Wei: This old man?

Gao Xiumin: Mayor, please come in. What are you doing outside?

Fan Wei: Whose house is this?

Zhao Benshan: Sit down!

Fan Wei: Oh

Gao Xiumin: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Zhao Benshan: Hahahaha

Gao Xiumin: Mayor, what do you want? Are you up yet?

Fan Wei: Oops, I still didn’t think of it.

Gao Xiumin: Did I see you off on the day you left for middle school? When I saw you off on your way, you turned around and waved to the villagers. At that time, my heart was filled with tears of silence.

Zhao Benshan: Is the camel bell ringing in your ears?

Gao Xiumin: Don’t you remember this?

Fan Wei: Ah~I have remembered the lyrics~but you still haven’t remembered it.

Gao Xiumin: No wonder you can’t remember it. You said that when you left middle school, I was in my 30s and I am 50 this year.

Zhao Benshan: I am 56.

Gao Xiumin: Who asked you?

Zhao Benshan: If you ask me, I am 56, born in the Year of the Rooster~

Gao Xiumin: You said you want to talk about this person, but there is nowhere to look. We haven’t seen each other in 20 years, you say Now that you are the head of the township, why should you go there to reason?

Fan Wei: As a township leader, I still haven’t been able to reason with you?

Zhao Benshan: What are you talking about? Township Chief Fan was born to be an official. Have you forgotten, Township Chief? Was I the village representative when I elected you as the township head?

Fan Wei: Ah, yes, yes,

Zhao Benshan: I remember it was raining continuously in July that year, and that guy never It rained all day long until noon, then there was a loud crack of thunder, and Mayor Fan was born

Fan Wei: Didn’t you mean that I was struck by lightning?

Gao Xiumin: Oh, the township chief didn’t mean that. What he meant was: with a thunderous thunder, Xiao Fan came to be the township chief and led the farmers to make a revolution~

< p>Zhao Benshan: Ah, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh.

Fan Wei: Hehehehe~ Old uncle, what are you talking about? It’s not you, there must be something wrong.

Gao Xiumin: No, no, we have nothing to do, it’s all trivial matters. Head of the township, you said you have had too many things happen this year, why don’t you give me the answer? How many good things have been done in our entire township? You said that from popularizing scientific farming to developing grain projects, you go to the bank today and go to the Science and Technology Commission tomorrow. You have really broken your heart, worn out your mouth, and almost destroyed your body from exhaustion.

Zhao Benshan: I even carried water for the widow! ~The whole town knows this.

Fan Wei: Ah, those are all small things, oh~

Gao Xiumin: There are also big things, big things~

Zhao Benshan: Big things happen in a year You're old. Hong Kong's return, the Three Gorges flood control, the 15th National Congress, and Chairman Jiang's visit to the United States have kept you busy this year~~~~~~~Isn't this what he did?

Gao Xiumin: That's not right, he has radiated energy~

Zhao Benshan: Yes, when you get nervous, we all go crazy~

Fan Wei: Why am I so nervous?

Zhao Benshan: Keep your spirits up,

Fan Wei: I’m telling you, you don’t need to wear a hat on me, just tell me if you have something to do.

Zhao Benshan: He won’t let me tell you.

Gao Xiumin: It’s nothing, isn’t it? It’s the new year, your old uncle and I put it together, you said that Mayor Fan will be here for one year Since we have led our entire township so well, we, on behalf of the basic masses, come to wish Mayor Fan a happy New Year~

Fan Wei: Thank you, thank you, thank you

Zhao Benshan: Happy New Year~ < /p>

Gao Xiumin: We sincerely wish the mayor good health and peace every year, happiness as high as the East China Sea, and longevity as long as the Southern Mountains.

Zhao Benshan: Will always live in our hearts.

Fan Wei: Haha~ No~ You always use your words inappropriately. If you have something to do, just talk about it. If there is nothing, hey, I have to go——

Zhao Benshan: Which of my words is wrong?

Gao Xiumin: Don’t keep talking nonsense,

Zhao Benshan: I said it has no other meaning,

Gao Xiumin: Go sit there and wait. , the defeat was noisy.

Zhao Benshan: Let’s talk quickly, we have to leave~

Gao Xiumin: Township chief, we have something~

Fan Wei: Look, I I know you must have something going on, come on, talk about it.

Gao Xiumin: So what? Your brother-in-law went to our house yesterday.

Fan Wei: What did he do?

Gao Xiumin: He gave us an ultimatum, saying that we would not be allowed to raise turtles, and that if we didn’t agree to this, he would fish out our bastard and have him bled.

Zhao Benshan: So what~ Township chief, let me tell you, hee~ I don’t know if it’s a good idea or not.

Fan Wei: It’s okay, just say it~

Zhao Benshan: Your brother-in-law has a bad influence on you, hee hee~ He is a bit power-hungry~ Hee hee~ It’s hard to say, but it’s just a bad influence. He went to my house that day, and as soon as the guy came in, he told me, who is that? Are the old wimpa and the old lady at home? Get me two bastards! The two of us were just simmering together. We drank more than a kilogram, and there was no way to listen to what we said.

Gao Xiumin: Oh, that guy is bragging, saying that he is negotiating in Russia to buy an aircraft carrier.

Zhao Benshan: Quickly empty the fish pond, so that I can come back and seize the time to train.

Fan Wei: Are you always the fish farming king Zhao Laowei?

Zhao Benshan: It is Your Majesty.

Fan Wei: I recognized you as soon as you came in~

Zhao Benshan: Oh my god, the township chief recognized me~

Gao Xiumin: Township Sir, this is something about this fish pond that we are here to ask. Isn’t it due? Let’s ask who will be awarded the next issue?

Fan Wei: Oops~ Regarding this matter, you have to wait until the new year and the next township head will inform you~

Gao Xiumin: The next one?

Zhao Benshan: Just tell me~ Come on

Fan Wei: Didn’t the People’s Congress just finish? I’m no longer the township chief.

Gao Xiumin: Are you down?

Fan Wei: Ah, you’re down~hehehe~

Zhao Benshan: Oh my god, you’re down? Oh, my God, if you come down here, you should have told me earlier that you will make me and my wife tired~ This guy will be on the same level if he comes down, and I don’t have to be afraid of you~ Oh, he’s coming down.

Gao Xiumin: Can you give us some water? This guy said that his throat is dry~

Fan Wei: OK, OK~

Gao Xiumin: Oh my god, this guy is tired~

Zhao Benshan: Oops~ This guy can’t even take a breath,

Fan Wei: Pour some water~~~

Zhao Benshan: That’s enough, let’s share it~ No need~

Fan Wei: Haha~

Zhao Benshan: Do you have any cigarettes?

Fan Wei: Ahhh~ I don’t smoke, I’m sorry~

Zhao Benshan: Forget it.

Gao Xiumin: Oops, we’re down~

Zhao Benshan: Well, why are you supporting me? Corruption?

Fan Wei: Ah~ that’s the thing.

Gao Xiumin: Stop talking! We don’t care whether you can get down or not. The two of us here today just want to know who our village has contracted this fish pond to.

Fan Wei: Didn’t I say that after the New Year, you will understand.

Gao Xiumin: Oh no, don’t celebrate the New Year. Who doesn’t understand? Now I understand. Then you don’t have to ask. It must be for your brother-in-law. You two will do it together. ~ I said three fat guys,

Zhao Benshan: Three fat guys?

Fan Wei: Ahhhh~ My nickname is San Fatty, haha~

Zhao Benshan: Oh~ My nickname is Gou Shengzi.

Gao Xiumin: Third Fatty, I’m not talking about you. As a fellow villager, you are really not interesting. You said that you have had enough of being the township head for so many years. You made arrangements with your brother-in-law before you stepped down. I offended you Regarding human matters, let the next leader say, you pretend to be a good person on the outside, I am not saying that you are a fat man, a leading cadre like you,

Zhao Benshan: Hey, hey, hey~

Gao Xiumin: That’s right, I’ll jerk you off~ That’s right~

Zhao Benshan: What are you doing? This is too much. Why are you like this? What you said just now is no longer right. If you say those nasty things when people come down, I don’t like it, right? Since this eldest nephew has suddenly become a fat man from the township head, we shouldn't give him a slap in the face, right? At this time, people need understanding and comfort the most, right? Who hasn’t made some mistakes in their life? If you make a mistake, correct it, and make it again after you have corrected it.

Fan Wei: Huh?

Zhao Benshan: Isn’t it true that after making a mistake, you should correct it, and after correcting it, you should make a mistake again? fine! This~~~old uncle will communicate with you. I haven’t eaten yet, so why don’t we have two cups?

Gao Xiumin: Cough~

Fan Wei: Oh, oh, that’s great~ Come on, come on, come on, go on the kang, go on the kang~

Zhao Benshan: At this time, people are the emptiest. Don't do that to him.

Gao Xiumin: Why are you so big-hearted?

Zhao Benshan: How can life be so smooth?

Gao Xiumin: The money channels are blocked, so you still have the energy to drink?

Zhao Benshan: Just stay~

Gao Xiumin: Even if you give me Yunnan Baiyao now, you still can’t mend the trauma in our souls~ Go home

Zhao Benshan : Why are you like this?

Gao Xiumin: I let you go home~

Zhao Benshan: I let you - stay! Beautiful? I can't control you anymore, just sit there and be silent! Sit down! ...All good things come from the same family, right? The earth has to revolve around you, are you the sun? What's the use of those ozone layers?

Gao Xiumin: Does his brother-in-law know how to raise fish?

Zhao Benshan: Will I be able to do it in my next life? Let’s learn! It's okay, Fatty Three. If you tell your brother-in-law that there is something he doesn't know how to do, ask your old uncle. If your old uncle can't do anything else, this is definitely fish farming. Let me tell you, why don't you come down? You just have nothing to do. You raise fish, and you are tired from being the mayor of the township for a year - you are so tired. I'm suing you for nothing, you can't do it! You raise fish! I am - fifty or sixty thousand a year!

Gao Xiumin: Cough~

Zhao Benshan: If you cough, it’s also fifty or sixty thousand, so you don’t need to put that away~ Especially raising turtles, you can make a lot of money. I'm telling you, I'll get you two. This is all about keeping an eye on the water and mastering the feed. I prepare the feed entirely myself! After eating, you should love it for longer.

Fan Wei: Drink~

Zhao Benshan: Drinking is not good, drinking will get on your head. If you give it wine, it won’t even eat the lees!

Fan Wei: I said we were drinking!

Zhao Benshan: Ah~ we two, I was wondering if you were plying the bastard with wine! Hey, drink!

(The phone rings)

Zhao Benshan: You did that~

Fan Wei: No, I can’t drink that. Phone call~

Zhao Benshan: I’ll answer~ Who’s coming? You did that, uh uh uh, you drink, I’ll tell him to go. Who are you? Drinking.

I quit, don’t do it here, just raise fish~~~ Hey, if you say anything else is useless, you just quit! Report to County Magistrate Fan? You go to the county magistrate or go to the township head's house to stop working. It's useless to talk to me about it. He reports to County Magistrate Fan...

Fan Wei: It's me.

(Benshan lands)

Fan Wei: Hey~hey~It’s okay~It’s okay~There is a guest here~

Zhao Benshan: Where are my shoes? It's over, it's over, the good news comes from the delivery room, I've been promoted... It's time! I said I won't let you come and I won't let you come. What's going on this time? I think you are a rat and will die by working as an escort for a cat to make money!

Gao Xiumin: Then you blame me?

Zhao Benshan: If you don’t blame, who do you blame? Did I get on the bed just now?

Fan Wei: Yes,

Zhao Benshan: Did I drink?

Fan Wei: Yes,

Gao Xiumin: Why are you eating other people’s food?

Fan Wei: That’s right!

Zhao Benshan: How can this be done?

Fan Wei: Let’s deal with it later!

Zhao Benshan: Oh my god~

Gao Xiumin: What should we do?

Zhao Benshan: Let’s go back~

Gao Xiumin: Then our turtle is still in the house, and there is a basket!

Zhao Benshan: What turtle do you want!

Fan Wei: (comes out with shoes) Hey, here you go——

Zhao Benshan: You should stew this and eat it, it will taste so good, my God ~

Fan Wei: Hehe, put on your clothes and don’t catch a cold~ Let’s go into the house~

Gao Xiumin: We won’t cover that fish pond,

Fan Wei: Come inside!

Gao Xiumin: We really don’t want to cover the fish pond anymore.

Fan Wei: Come into the house!

Gao Xiumin: We really don’t care anymore. Now we go back to the shack to dig out the bastard and bleed it. No more contract~

Fan Wei: Auntie, you are forcing me. To tell you the truth, you will continue to contract the next fish pond!

Gao Xiumin: Impossible, then I asked you in the room and you didn’t say anything~

Fan Wei: Why didn’t I want to tell you that? You said that my brother-in-law wanted to cover up Fish pond, is he that kind of guy? He can’t do anything well and can’t eat enough. I’m afraid that if I tell you, the first year of the year, when word got out, he would drink some wine and go to this and that in our house. I’m annoying him. ! Auntie, I have been busy for a year, and I also want to have a quiet year! Aunt!

Gao Xiumin: Then won’t he still have to make trouble with you after the New Year?

Fan Wei: Who is going to make trouble? After the Chinese New Year, I went to work in the county. There was a new leader in the township. Who was he making trouble for?

Zhao Benshan: Yes, if he is making trouble, stop him!

Fan Wei: Ha, that’s right!

Gao Xiumin: Thank you so much, mayor.

Zhao Benshan: Good person.

Gao Xiumin: Thank you very much. Then why don’t you come to our house for some food?

Fan Wei: It’s okay~ Are you both relieved this time? Take everything~ I still have to report in.

Gao Xiumin: Hey, mayor, this is for you~you can eat it

Fan Wei: No, no, no, no, no, no~ Goodbye, old lady!

Zhao Benshan: Goodbye, old uncle!

(End)