Funny and tasteful classic funny sentences (selected 62 sentences)

1, keep a low profile! Is the most awesome show off!

2. The happiness of ostrich is just a pile of sand.

I am not cool at all, but I am handsome.

4. Take a newspaper to the toilet. I am a scholar.

Sometimes, I dream that I am full.

6. Roses are cheap, so you can give them to your wife.

7. If I become an emperor, I will make you a prince!

8. If I can't beat you, I will turn against you.

9. As long as the hoe jumps well, is there a corner that can't be dug down?

10, there is no trace of wings in the sky, but birds have flown by.

1 1. I didn't mean to be different. How can I have outstanding taste?

12, who didn't meet two scum when he was young?

13, I can't help but want to smoke …

14, not afraid of enemies like tigers, but afraid of teammates like pigs.

15, you are not an idiot, but why do you pretend to be an idiot?

16, I heard that you are not doing well. I sat at the door and enjoyed the whole day.

17. Live the blues spirit of hip-hop like erhu.

18, the highest level of fat people is to wear school pants into jeans.

19, honey, I can shelter you from the wind, and don't block my electric fan.

20. Being a handsome person is very tiring, which I really know.

2 1, don't always be hot and cold to me, in that case I'm afraid of catching a cold.

22. As soon as others praise me, I am worried that others will not praise me enough.

23, don't discharge at me, my daughter-in-law has a caller ID.

24. It was a flower heart to get married at first, but it was a mistake to divorce later.

25. I want to be a female hooligan in thought and a good girl in life.

Love is always more sacred than marriage, and marriage is always more affordable than love.

27. Being beautiful is annoying. If I were a boy, I would marry myself.

28. The sunshine is warm and the years are quiet. How can I get old before you come?

29. Besides love, there are radishes in other people's fields.

30. I shine in this beautiful moment with the attitude of God. Mortals do not disturb.

3 1. The best way to ruin a good song is to set it as an alarm.

32. Because I am not an ordinary person, I have never spoken Mandarin.

I won't watch you jump into the fire pit, I'll close my eyes.

34. I scared you to death when I said it. I have majored in selling cute since kindergarten.

I have never told you my true identity. Actually, I'm Snow White.

36. In the next life, I must be your heart, so if I don't jump, you will die.

37. China's good voice, in the eyes of primary school students, is the best ringtone for class.

38. You look ok, but I think you look good when you make a mask.

Sighing is the most time-wasting thing, and crying is the most energy-wasting behavior.

40. I heard that there would be radiation when the mobile phone was placed under the pillow, which scared me to throw away the pillow immediately.

4 1, I was afraid of the dark since I was a child, and I didn't study well when I was a child because I didn't dare to look at the blackboard.

42. Every woman has one of the most common mistakes, and that is capriciousness.

A liar is the most sincere person in the world, but he wants to cheat you.

44. What is happiness? Happiness is that you eat fish, I eat meat and watch others chew bones.

45. Not everyone can keep a low profile. The basis of keeping a low profile is to keep a high profile at all times.

46. I am always alienated by ordinary people because I am too handsome. You see, no one was watching when I said it.

The only way to get happiness is to cherish what you have and forget what you don't have.

48. Look in the mirror when you look good. After all, this illusion does not exist every day.

49, accumulate over a long period, may lead to an outbreak; And if it breaks out for a long time, it may lead to collapse.

50. Don't say love to others easily, don't stubbornly open other people's doors, just make a joke and leave.

5 1. The most famous woman in history is not Pan Jinlian or Wu Zetian, but Rong Mammy.

52. Don't tell me what I like about you, just change it. I like you and I don't like you, but you change it!

53. Every time the aunt in the canteen hears the class is over, she will silently say: The enemy has not yet arrived at the battlefield.

54. I always comfort myself when you suddenly don't reply to my message. It's okay. You may be dead.

55. I suddenly want to rely on my handsome face to go out and cheat money to eat and drink and live a comfortable and relaxed life.

56. None of the women who participated in the beauty pageant can find a good man, because all the good men are married, such as me.

57. Today, a girl praised me for being thin. I slapped her in the face. Can't you see how handsome I am? !

58. Love is mean, and it is mean again and again. When you stop being a bitch, women come!

59. Occasionally, one or two funny jokes can make the communication atmosphere relaxed and happy, and also show the humor and wisdom of the confidante.

60. What happened? Let's talk openly. Don't always call me beautiful and lovely behind my back. Are you bored? Like no one knows.

6 1, unpacking a pack of snacks in the classroom is like feeding pigeons in People's Square, and bringing a pack of tissues in school is like handing out leaflets in the city square.

62. There are countless spare tires and they are constantly embarrassed. This does not mean that they are excellent, but only that they are cheap and universal. And usually very good people are more likely to be single, such as me.