An encyclopedia of humorous and signed sentences

Funny boys have quaint ideas because they have a good sense of humor. I carefully collected humorous signed sentences for everyone to enjoy and learn!

Humorous signature selected sentences

1. Try gold with fire, women with gold and men with women.

2. Being angry is to punish yourself with other people's mistakes.

3. Go to Google Baidu.

If you can't tolerate me, it means that you are either too narrow-minded or too great in personality.

Life is like a play, it all depends on acting.

6. A woman is like a book on the shelf. Although you bought her, before you bought her, she was more or less turned over by several men …

7. If you look in the mirror and pay taxes, I'm afraid some women will go bankrupt.

8. Women conquer men with stockings, and men conquer banks with stockings.

9. There are too many liars and obviously not enough fools.

10. Honey, you must believe me. I feel dizzy even by boat, let alone by two boats.

1 1. Youth is dedicated to the house and middle age to the children.

12. If you were a flower, cows wouldn't dare to shit in the future!

13. When I was a child, I was not sensible. I often dragged mm shopping and hurt a lot of MM. I don't pull it now, but I didn't expect it to hurt …

14. You take your overpass and I'll take my underpass.

15. The most important thing in life is not location, but direction. It's also a B. You can become a NB if you travel south, but you can only be a SB if you don't look back.

16. Melamine made a comeback and was immediately named "Amine-adding Gate" by netizens.

17. Wang Meng won the championship with four details: First, the race was like Bolt running 100 meters, and Wang had too much advantage; Second, after winning the championship, Wang knelt on the ice facing the coach; The third is to be interviewed by reporters. "Who are you most grateful for?" The personality girl who once wrote about the inspection and the ban said, thank you for your leadership, thank you for the people of the motherland, thank you for your coach, thank you for your parents, and thank you for myself!

18. Work of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs: expressing dissatisfaction on Monday; Protest on Tuesday; Strongly condemned on Wednesday; Solemn representations on Thursday; I'm sorry about Friday. Rest on Saturday and Sunday.

19. Spring Festival travel rush's unique trick to go home in the rush hour./kloc-Please don't imitate it when you are under 0/8 years old: a migrant worker in Beijing came to the State Bureau of Letters and Calls with more than a dozen pieces of paper with A written on it. Immediately, a van came from the Beijing office, sent him back to his hometown, and had two meals on the way.

20. Lang Xianping: If you say so, don't lose sleep! Per capita salary, the first place is Germany, USD/hour; The first place is the United States, dollars; Thailand is the dollar; Our hourly 10 cents! And the last one in the world.

Popular sentences with humorous signatures

1. After studying for more than ten years, I think kindergarten is better.

You eat yours, I eat yours, you don't eat mine, I only eat yours, after eating yours, you go!

3. Rural Credit Cooperatives: Rural Credit Cooperatives are intimate people of Lao Bai's sexual life.

4. Popularize compulsory education: it is better to adopt a daughter who doesn't study than to raise a pig! Raising a son who doesn't study is like raising a donkey!

5. What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman beats small monsters.

6. There are many ugly mobile phones in the world, and you can't find one uglier than yours!

7. Who held my hand and made me crazy for half my life; Who, kiss my eyes, cover my half-life displacement.

8. Who says crows are as black as crows? In fact, one is darker than the other!

9. I skipped classes too much. I wanted to go to class yesterday. Seeing the professor, the professor was surprised and said, I haven't seen you for so long, and I have grown so big.

10. Although I can't be a descendant of the rich, I must be an ancestor of the rich.

A humorous classic signature sentence

1. The old leader sighed. How happy you are! There are ladies everywhere. Not only was I on a business trip, but my family of seven were all crowded together. If I want to make out, I have to sprinkle candy outside the door and shout, "Little friend, I'll hold your mother down and grab the candy!" "

2. A neighbor lived with an old man who rode his bike to the seaside nursing home every day, and just went out and met him again. Say "good morning" to him and ask; "You go there by bike every day. What's the fun? " He rolled out his bike and answered; "There are many young single women in their seventies and eighties."

On the way, I heard an emotional phone call from an uncle: Yes! The national football team scored a goal! That's right! This is men's football! Yes, yes! It's a game with South Korea! What? Same to you? Right, right, right! The other side is also a men's football team!

Boeing of America and Airbus of France are a conspiracy. If the United States wants to sell planes, let the French president see _ _; If France wants to sell planes, let Obama of the United States see _ _. China bought a large number of planes in constant protests, and finally reached the world level of one plane per capita.

5. The most typical news expression in China: (1) The masses are in stable mood/the injured are in stable mood/the family members are in stable mood; () the broad masses of cadres and people have said; () people who don't know the truth; () A handful of people with ulterior motives; () deliver an important speech; () Meeting agreed: () Representative; () make irresponsible remarks; () Interfering in China's internal affairs; () Relevant departments.

6. The propaganda organization in China seems to have been captured by NB. For decades, I have been praising the following abnormal deeds: my wife didn't go to the hospital when she gave birth, but stayed in the factory to screw the screws; Parents died, not mourning for scientific research; I saved six or seven people in the river, but my wife drowned; Let your children drop out of school to support their ex-wife's children-these advanced people are animals.

7. The masses have crossed the river and the cadres are still pretending to touch the stones.

8. Life is a coffee table, and we are all in pain. When the harmonious sunshine hits our faces, everyone in pain laughs!

The important task of the post-9. After 80, it was created after 00.

10. Bajie, don't think you are a night pig standing under a street lamp.

1 1. Please don't ask him to use his brain-his left brain is full of water and his right brain is full of flour, so he just moves casually and everything is paste.

12. Loneliness is a person's carnival, and carnival is the loneliness of a group of people.

13. On the way to Fan Jing, Tongren, Guizhou, the slogan of a slaughterhouse reads: Use Theory of Three Represents Theory to guide our slaughter work!

14. I really want to have a quiet and serious secret love like Don Quixote.

15. Every time I miss a girl, I put a brick on the mountain, and the world has the Great Wall.

16. men-before engagement, they are obedient like grandchildren. After engagement, learn to talk back like a son. Give orders like Lao Zi after marriage.

17. You look peaceful, you look well-intentioned, you look weird, and you look heartless.

18. Are you missing or kidnapped? If you lose it, don't look for it. Might as well be kidnapped!

19. You are the wind, I am the sand, you are the leather shoes, I am the brush, you are the Hami, I am the melon, you ignore me and I commit suicide!

20.are you blind? You can't see such a big shield, but you want to throw stones at my head!