Funny copywriting in a circle of friends

1. I have a feeling close to Ma Yun: making money is not as powerful as him, at least uglier than him.

When I met her, I finally let Xiao Wang end a person's life. At first it was cows and horses.

3. Bargaining is a comprehensive language ability including philosophy, negotiation, debate and diplomacy.

I practiced reversing into the warehouse two days ago. I can't get in either side. Finally, the coach said, "Come on, get off! Let's go in! "

Buy medicine for dad online and wait.

It took more than ten days to arrive and my father recovered. This is the legendary medicine for curing diseases.

One day, my mobile phone rang, and my mother picked it up and shouted, "Come and answer the phone, there is a monk looking for you."

7. "Doctor, tell me what's wrong?" "It's disgusting!" "How heavy is it?" "

eight

4 kg

Eight. Sometimes I hate myself, I can't talk, I'm too kind, heartless and cute.

9. I heard a girl talking to her boyfriend on the subway. She said this: "I have arrived in Xizhimen, come out and walk to the subway station." If you arrive, I haven't arrived yet, you wait first. If I arrive and you haven't, just wait. "

I quarreled with my boyfriend for many days, but he ignored me. Just now, I suddenly sent a sigma symbol to me. What does he mean?

Have you ever been afraid of your wife? B: Yes. Can you tell me what you fear most about your wife? B: I'm most afraid of my wife leaking air.

12. A word proves that you are still single? I'll go first: the back seat of the battery car is full of dirt!

13. Today is a week.

Go home from school. Send a message to ask mom what's at home? My mother replied, "One.

A woman who is still beautiful at the age of 36. "

14. Some people make friends because of hobbies, while others make friends because they are useful and unnecessary. I'm different. The one who can grab the bill is my best friend for life!

15. Let's talk it over. We can't look up at each other, can we? ! !

Sixteen years old. "Ray, I heard that your major in college is fluid mechanics?" "Yes, leader." "Well, go and get me a glass of water." "Leader, please respect this major, fluid mechanics is …" "Please talk about the application of non-isentropic steady-state compressible magnetohydrodynamic equation in continuous plasma confined controlled thermonuclear fusion." "Leader, where is the water dispenser?"

17. The fastest person in the world is the Flash, and even faster than the Flash is the southerner who took off his clothes and got into bed in winter.

18. In short, Michelle Chen is the most like the little dragon girl Nezha I have ever seen.