How to politely decline an event invitation

How to tactfully refuse event invitations

How to tactfully refuse event invitations. Sometimes you don’t want to go to an event, but you don’t know how to refuse. A friend invites you to play or eat with you. , but sometimes depending on your mood, there may be times when you don’t want to go. Or even if they are not friends, they don’t want to say hurtful words and just want to politely refuse. Here's how to politely decline an event invitation. How to tactfully refuse an event invitation 1

1. Let the other party cancel on their own

When we want to refuse someone else's invitation, it is best to be able to get ahead of the other person's thinking, break the rules, and devise clever plans , let the other party cancel on their own. For example, if you are studying and your classmates invite you to go out to play together, you can say: I have set a goal for myself. I will spend three hours today to familiarize myself with the content in the book. I will never go out to play until I complete it. .

Your attitude must be firm. Even if the other party guesses that you are looking for excuses, they will be too embarrassed to forcefully invite you out, so they will have to cancel the invitation on their own.

2. Speak out and persuade

In most cases, when we do have reasons why it is inconvenient to accept an invitation, we can directly explain it. As long as your attitude is sincere and the reason is appropriate, let the other party I believe that the reasons you stated are true and that your refusal was out of helplessness. Even if you fail to agree to his invitation, I can still understand you.

3. Delay and pushback

Under normal circumstances, the tone should be tactful and the meaning should be firm when refusing, but sometimes, when we are undecided or When you don't want to ruin the relationship by refusing outright, you can use delaying tactics when the opportunity arises.

4. Pre-emptively

When someone invites you, you always hope to accept it smoothly. Once you open your mouth, if you reject it directly, it will make him feel "unsatisfied" Give face" and cause dissatisfaction with you.

Using offense as defense and striking first is a good strategy for rejection. Before the other party opens his mouth, you speak first. As if unintentionally, you have blocked the other party's mouth, making it impossible for the other party to say any more words of invitation. Moreover, because the other party has not made it clear to you, your refusal is not valid. It will embarrass him. How to tactfully refuse event invitations 2

First, a friend is invited to a real estate event and he doesn’t want to go, so he just says that the time is not right. I thought it was okay, but a few days later, they came again and said that we had changed the time and it would be okay now. He then said, "I really don't have time. Thank you for the invitation." They were unhappy and said that we had changed the time for you.

Whether the other party changed the time for him remains to be verified, but his refusal to refuse others simply gave others an excuse.

This friend is a bit like me a few years ago. When I was young at that time, I always felt that I had high emotional intelligence and didn't need to make rejection look too ugly. The routine often used is to promise others first, and then make up various reasons to express that they really want to go but can't.

Finally, one time, I angered a friend, saying that if you go, you can go, and if you don’t go, you won’t go. He is always so hesitant. It’s really annoying. I was shocked and hesitant. I didn’t want to go in the first place. Later, I observed a lot of people and found that no matter how many excuses they make up or how many backing ups they give to so-called rejections with high emotional intelligence, they give others the impression that they are unreliable and easy to change. Rejecting this matter is the highest expression of emotional intelligence: just do it if it works, don't do it if you don't, and don't pretend.

Second, you don’t dare to reject others outright. On the surface, you are thinking of others and don’t want to embarrass them. In fact, you take yourself too seriously and feel that if you refuse, their hearts will be broken.

In fact, anyone who makes a request is mentally prepared to be rejected. He may even recognize the option of rejection more than you.

Don’t think that the other person has high hopes and has to ask you to speak. The world is full of people who have a try mentality and make unreliable demands. Every time they cast the net, they may catch a few merciless and merciless people.

There is a story circulating in the real estate industry about how happy the eldest brother Wang Shi is. He sold a piece of land to someone else and had already paid the deposit. When everyone was having dinner together, the buyer had a serious expression and felt uncomfortable on one side and uncomfortable on the other, but he would not say why he felt uncomfortable.

Wang Shi said considerately, if you still feel uncomfortable after we finish the meal, I will return the money to you. After the meal, he asked the man if he felt comfortable. The man said he still felt uncomfortable, so he refunded the money.

In fact, the location and shape of that piece of land were not very good. It was left there for many years but was not sold. In other words, it is natural that this piece of land cannot be sold, and selling it is an unexpected surprise. Wang Shi will never doubt his life because this piece of land cannot be sold, let alone block friends who reject him.

Not everyone is as lucky as this buyer. In reality, for many people, if you don’t refuse flatly, they will slowly convince you to do something you don’t want to do. And when you actually do it, the other party will not be grateful to you. On the contrary, they will make excuses for your attitude.

Third, rejection does not require explanation. The more you explain, the easier it is to give others the wrong impression: You are deliberately rejecting me, or you are deliberately raising your status in order to make me keep begging you.

If you leave hope to others, you will induce others to pay. This is an objective fact.

When someone asks you for help, you don’t say you can’t help, but say you are busy today. The next day, someone else asks you to help, and you say you will talk about it tomorrow. On the third day, they want to treat you to dinner. On the fourth day, if you say that I really can't help, that person will definitely be furious. If you can't help, you should have said it earlier. It's a waste of expression.

Another reason why we don’t reject others simply is that we are afraid of leaving the impression of being unsympathetic to our friends.

In fact, the interactions between the vast majority of people in the world do not rise to the level of friendship at all, but operate within rules. Rules are the only truth to test reliability. , if you can do it, do it with all your heart and joy, and if you can't do it, inform the other party as soon as possible. This is the rule of interpersonal communication with the lowest cost. Others choose you, and you simply refuse, which is giving the right of choice back to the other person.

I want you to be my girlfriend, but you refuse. The choice is in my hands. I can choose to continue chasing you or chase someone else without any psychological burden.

If you neither refuse nor agree, and delay for various reasons, the choice is in your hands. I don’t know when the boot will fall on your head.

This is the greatest selfishness and harm.

Even in love, we are not the only alternative, not to mention other things. In fact, you are not that important. There is no need to worry about the person rejected by you having nowhere to go. On the contrary, your rejection may make him feel happy. bloom. How to politely decline an event invitation 3

Don’t hesitate, answer immediately

A friend invites you to play, but you are not interested and don’t want to go. At this time, you did not clearly answer "go" or "no".

And your performance is:

① Silent for a few seconds (or more than ten seconds).

② Say "Let me think about it first, let me look at my schedule."

③"I don't know if I will be free that day. I won't know until that day."

Wait, similar behavior.

Well, from a psychological point of view, the other party has understood that you are subconsciously refusing, and the next time he asks you out, he will hesitate to ask you out again.

The longer the silence, the harder it is to say no. Your friend can't help but think to himself, "Why doesn't he answer me?", "Does he think I'm causing trouble for him?".

Even if you answer the other person "go" after being silent, your friend will think you are lying. "If you don't want to go, just say you don't want to go. It doesn't matter. Why lie?" and you will feel unhappy in your heart.

So don’t be silent. Answer the other party clearly from the beginning whether you are going to go or not, and then explain the reason why you can’t go, whether you have already made an appointment with someone else or you just have to go that day. "Business trip," etc., everything is fine. The other person will also be considerate.

Expressing an attitude of unwillingness to refuse

A very important point in politely declining a friend's invitation is to express "I actually really want to go, but I can't help it. I can't go this time." , what a pity!" language and attitude.

Although I really wanted to go, I had to refuse, and I had to say no reluctantly.

If you refuse in this way, the friend who invites you to play will not have a bad feeling, and the relationship with your friend will continue to be good.

03 Use work or family matters or unavoidable reasons to refuse

The most basic way to refuse an invitation is to cite the reasons why you cannot participate in the invitation. But it's hard to say "I'm not interested". After all, we are all adults, and it is really hurtful to reject people so nakedly.

Lying is also an expedient method at this time, so here are examples of "there is a meeting with the company that I can't refuse", "I have agreed to visit my relative when he is hospitalized", etc., so that friends can speak frankly It would be better to say "Then there is nothing we can do".

Never reject a friend on the grounds of "my boyfriend and I made an appointment that day" or "because I made an appointment with other female friends that day". In this way, the friend will subconsciously think, "Oh, I am not as important as them in your heart." He may not feel it immediately, but this idea has begun to take root in his heart.

Don't forget to say "Thank you for inviting me", "I'm sorry that I can't go this time" etc.

Just imagine that even if you are not interested Things, but having friends who think of you and invite you to hang out is a happy thing in itself, isn't it?

Friends have fun with you, so they want to play with you. If a friend like that invites you, you must be careful about how to refuse.

Be sure to express in words your gratitude for the invitation and your apology for not being able to attend the invitation.

If you are rejected and say something like "I can't go this time, I'm really sorry, but I'm really glad you invited me! Thank you", this way the other party won't be unhappy. Feel.

Even if you refuse, express concern

The type of person who refuses a friend’s invitation without any interest at all. Most of the time, they will say bluntly “I’m not interested, I won’t go.” , how does this make the friend who invited you feel?

A friend who is rejected will have two thoughts:

① Don’t look for him again.

②This person has a bad character.

So no matter what the situation is, it is a sign of high emotional intelligence to consider the other person's point of view and refuse with a considerate attitude.

Don’t be tough when refusing. You can tell the other person, “Although I can’t go this time, tell me what you had fun that day.” Expressing concern in this way can help the other person not feel uncomfortable even if they are rejected, let alone be disliked by friends.

Tell the other person, "You can come back to me next time when I am free."

The most difficult way to refuse is to invite yourself multiple times, but you keep refusing. The next time I'm invited, I still want to refuse.

In fact, it is already obvious that you don’t want to hang out with him.

However, this friend may not be aware of your idea, so he invites you repeatedly. It is also very embarrassing to refuse with reasons every time.

In this case, how should you refuse? I believe that many girls have been invited by more difficult boys in this way. Even if they refuse in every possible way, the other party will still continue to invite them.

At this time, the unconscious guidance in psychology can come in handy. You can use the signal "Don't invite me again" to contain the other party. Try saying "It's you who invites me all the time. I always can't go to the appointment because of the inconvenience. I'm really sorry. Next time when I'm free, Let me invite you instead.”

In this way, you don’t need to worry about how to refuse. He will wait for you to invite him and will not take the initiative to invite you during this period. If you are asked "Hey, why don't you ask me out yet?" in the future, just say "I've been very busy with work recently and can't spare any time."