Jokes about campus life

1. When I was at school, I was going to change my pants in the dormitory one day. I just took off my belt. Unexpectedly, several female students came in. I had no choice but to come to the dormitory next door with my pants. I untied my button and was about to take it off. Unexpectedly, several female students came in. I had no choice but to carry my pants to the door of the dormitory next door. Because I was in a hurry with pants in my hand, I had to kick open the dormitory door and shout, "Is there a woman in it?" Is there a woman? "I saw many girls sitting in the room, looking at me in horror. ...

2. One day, the geography teacher asked the students, where does this river go?

A student suddenly stood up and sang: The river flows eastward.

The teacher ignored him and then said, how many stars are there in the sky?

That classmate sang again: the stars in the sky can participate in Beidou.

The teacher is short of breath: get out!

Student: Just leave.

The teacher said helplessly, are you sick?

Student: You have everything I have!

Teacher: Try again. .....

Student: shout when you see an uneven road!

Teacher: Do you believe I hit you?

Student: Do it when you should. ...

The teacher was angry: I told you to drop out of school!

Student: Rush into Kyushu!

Hehe, I wish my brothers and sisters who are wandering outside in advance.

Friends who are studying know that some students often set up some "sets" to make fun of you. I remember when I was studying Yueyang Tower, classmate A suddenly pointed to the word "poem" in the sentence "Tang Xian's modern poems are engraved on it" in the textbook and asked me, "How do you pronounce these two words?" I was caught off guard and blurted out, "Poetry!" A immediately replied, "Hey, disciple!" I don't know. I was fooled Now I think hard for a moment, and I have the law of revenge. I asked, "How do you pronounce these two words?" A said, "I don't know." I knew there was such an answer. I smiled and said, "You are so outrageous! You don't even know the' master'! "

At the end of the art class, the teacher collected a classmate's picture book in the local area. Kangkang said to the teacher when handing in the picture book, "Teacher, please don't put my book at the bottom." The teacher asked strangely, "Why?" "Because I draw an egg, if I put it under it, it will be crushed."

5. Once in an English class, the sound of starting a motorcycle came from outside. The sound lasted for a long time, making people fidgety. At this time, the teacher noticed everyone's irritability, shook his head and said, "China's motorcycle. Hey! " After class, we found out that it was the workers who were logging!

The absent-minded professor was ill and had to stay in the hospital. When the doctor came to the door of his ward, the nurse said, "Professor, the doctor is here." The poor professor snorted and said, "Tell him I can't see him now. I am too ill. "

7. My friends and I were very proud when we first entered the military training. We just got the uniform from the material supply office and saw a man in uniform coming towards us. We immediately saluted and said loudly, "Good morning, sir."

"Good morning," the other replied. "The post office staff are at your service."

8. In the anatomy class, there are five hearts on the anatomy table, one of which is at least four times larger than the others.

The classmate whispered, "This man must have died of pleural effusion."

"This person must have died of myocarditis. His heart has become so thick that he must be inflamed. "

"This person must be a myocardial infarction, and both left and right ventricles are hypertrophy."

The teacher said, "In order to let the students see more clearly, I specially prepared a big cow heart today ..."

Classmate:! @@$%^&； *

One day in anatomy class, the teacher couldn't find the pointer, so he picked out a person's upper arm from the anatomy table, held it up, pointed to the blackboard and said, "Let's talk about the next question." ....

9. Teacher: "If you have twenty marks in one pocket and fifty marks in the other, what does that mean?" Student: "That means I'm not wearing my own pants."

10. Teacher: Please rewrite the sentence "My brother goes to school" into the future tense. Student: My brother's son goes to school.

1 1. In the computer class, the absent-minded Luca was asked by the professor by name. "Why don't you answer, Luca? Is my question difficult? " "Oh, no, sir. I fully understand your question, but the answer stumped me. "

12. Several students get together to compare who worships foreign things the least. Wang Jia spoke first: I never buy foreign goods; Yi Lee shook his head: I never watch foreign movies; Zhang Bing stood up slowly and said, Hum, I have never failed a foreign language exam since I entered school!