I am 29 years old, and my mother asked my brother for a bride price of 680,000 yuan. What should I do with my love?

Yu Jing kept crying when she told her love story. She didn't understand why she was just a "obedient boy", but she was finally abandoned by all the people who cared. It's useless for her mother to scold herself. Her lover wants to break up. Life is a mess, and the future is muddy.

Yu Jing said: "I am 29 years old this year. I really want to get married, but this 60 thousand or 80 thousand bride price ruined everything for me. I really don't know what I did wrong. "

In fact, Yu Jing is a typical "please personality". For her mother and brother, she always thinks that obedience and patience can get praise and love, but as everyone knows, the result of flattering can't get everything she wants. It is like an endless greed, which eventually devours all of Yujing.

Yu Jing was born in a single-parent family since childhood. His six-year-old brother was just born and his father died in an accident. His mother and daughter were not so much dependent on each other as his brother became his mother's life.

All smiles of mother belong to younger brother, and all love of mother belongs to younger brother. No matter how good Yu Jing studies, how good he takes exams and how much housework he does at home, he can't compare with his younger brother's position in his mother's heart.

In the long run, Yu Jing has a feeling in his heart that as long as he pleases his younger brother and listens to his mother, he will get the same smile from his mother.

In the year of college entrance examination, Yu Jingwen took the first place in liberal arts and applied for the university in Beijing, which is the honor of every mother. However, Yu Jing's mother mercilessly tore up the application form and asked Yu Jing to fill in a new volunteer. Because her brother is still at school, she asked Yu Jing to stay in this city and help him study, so she can only apply for the university in this city.

After graduating from college, Yu Jing still worked in the city with a monthly salary of 1000 yuan for five years. Meanwhile, her brother graduated from college and is looking for a job. Her mother asked Yu Jing to help her find it. So Yu Jing made a lot of connections and found his brother a job with a monthly salary of 4.5k in his own company, which is not low for a newly graduated college student, but his mother refused.

Mom said, "Your monthly salary is 10,000, but you found a job for your brother for less than 5,000. Are you embarrassed? "

Yu Jing said awkwardly, "I just worked for five years and I don't have that many contacts." In the end, the mother only left a "useless" evaluation for Yu Jing and began to find a job for her son.

Yu Jing has a boyfriend, Wang Jun, who talked for three years. The relationship is stable. According to Yu Jing's idea, she doesn't want to get married before the age of 30. I hope her career is more stable.

However, my mother doesn't agree. She asked Yu Jing when Wang Jun proposed to her. She can't play with her.

Yu Jing was also very nervous after listening to her mother. The next day, she asked Wang Jun if he had ever thought about getting married. Wang Jun said, "Yes, but there is no house at home now. I didn't want to mention marriage so early. "

Yu Jing said, "But my mother has been urging me." Wang Jun quickly calmed his girlfriend's mood: "My parents prepared some money for me to buy a down payment." Yu Jing immediately beamed and asked Wang Jun to propose this week.

In the static home, Wang Jun just said something to propose. My mother immediately threw out a sentence: "Marriage is ok, but the bride price needs 60,000 to 80,000."

This sentence not only frightened Wang Jun, but also frightened Yu Jing. Yu Jing was about to speak, but his mother blinked at once and told Yu Jing to shut up.

Wang Jun said, "Aunt, all my money has been spent on buying a house. I really can't get such a colorful gift. Now there are only about 80,000. "

However, my mother said beyond doubt, "I don't care." If I can't come up with 60 thousand or 80 thousand, don't think I agree. "

In order to ease the atmosphere, Wang Jun had to go home and discuss with his parents and then leave. As soon as he went out, Yu Jing quickly asked his mother why she was so colorful.

Mom said, "Your brother and his girlfriend have been talking for several years. If he has no money, how can he buy a house? Is it easy for me to bring you up alone? As a sister, you shouldn't think about your brother's future. You can't be selfish. "

Yu Jing said, "What if his family really doesn't have that much money?" The mother replied, "If you don't force his family, how do you know that his family can't get out?" A word blocked in static mouth.

In the evening, Wang Jun called Yu Jing, saying that the family could come up with 65,438+10,000 yuan at most, hoping that Yu Jing would discuss it with her mother again, but Yu Jing returned without thinking: "I don't care, my mother said it must be 680,000 yuan. If you really love me, I will take it out and don't have to buy a house first. "

Yu Jing thought that she could not buy a house until she got married. However, the next day, instead of buying a house, she said, "Let's break up."

Wang Jun said: "Not all because of the 680,000 bride price, but because of your feelings for these two years. You listen to your mother too much, but you never think about me and our future. In that case, you should live with your mother and brother. "

In fact, Yu Jing doesn't really want to break up, but Yu Jing doesn't understand that real happiness requires subjective efforts and independent thinking.

Yu Jing's problem is that his mother has always preferred sons to daughters since childhood, and most children who grow up in this environment will go to two extremes.

One is independence, going its own way and getting rid of the shadow of family background. Such people may have a hard time with their families, but life is their own. You have no reason to take care of your brothers and sisters other than your parents. Even if you take care of your parents, you should be reasonable and never be foolish.

The other is to let nature take its course and think that parents are right. As long as parents are happy, they must do it. Unfortunately, Yu Jing belongs to the latter. This character doomed Yu Jing's tragic life and unfortunate love.

After all, I still agree with Wang Jun's decision to break up. Yu Jing's mother prefers boys to girls, but Yu Jing is also a "brother's helper" and even a "marionette" from a family. It's really hard to be happy to marry such a woman.

I once heard a saying that reading is not for eloquence and refutation, nor for credulity and blind obedience, but for thinking and weighing.

Yu Jing's tragedy seems to be a mother's son preference and moral kidnapping, but in fact she is still a cognitive problem. Without the ability to think independently, she lost everything she wanted.

So as a woman, it is the right way to think more and understand what to do and what not to do.

To be a daughter and a sister, you must first be yourself. After all, there is only one life. In order to win others' smiles, it is a big mistake to feel confused.

After all, if you can't do well and be a bold person, then any love and marriage will only be empty talk and feeble.