There are four types of speech

There are four types of speaking.

There are four types of speaking. No matter how high your speaking skills are, they are not as high as the word "reason". Speeches must be reasonable and allow others to accept and accept them. A real master should communicate with you from a deep spiritual perspective. Let’s take a look at the four types of speech and the four types of speech1

The first type: likes to express, talk endlessly, be optimistic, expressive, etc.

People of this type like to talk very much, and they will talk endlessly when they see people. This kind of person is naturally very optimistic, so There is no problem with his expressive ability, but the biggest problem is that he has no focus in his speech. He just loves to show off and express, so after the other party listens to his long speech, he will often ask: What exactly are you talking about? Do we often encounter such people in our daily lives?

If you are such a person, what you need to practice is not speaking, but your ability to listen. Your listening will determine your speaking, so we compare people with this way of expression to red People who speak very quickly and like to talk need to practice listening and understand the key points of practicing their true expression.

Most of these people will start chatting when they have a place to talk, and get out of control. They want to talk when they see people, and they want to express themselves when they see people. They are the only one in the room. sound, so if you are a red person like this and like to express yourself, what should you pay attention to? That is, when you speak in the future, you should calm down for three minutes and listen to the other person's point of view before you can express it. After you have listened, you can make an effective suggestion for his point of view. In this way, it will be easier for you. Able to impress the other party.

The second type: restrained and low-key, very logical in what they say and do.

This type of person is very logical when he speaks, and he thinks very logically in everything he does. We People with this way of expression are likened to blue. This type of person has data, theories, and arguments for any point of view. He has all these things. Precisely because he has all the arguments and prefers research, his logical thinking is more trustworthy, but he lacks a little enthusiasm when you speak, so a skill that needs to be cultivated is that you have to learn to be like us The first type of red people I just mentioned would be better off learning with more enthusiasm.

The third type: firm in goal, strong and decisive, and highly critical.

This type of person speaks with a very sense of purpose and knows very clearly what he wants to say. What, but they are very strong in daily life. We compare people with this expression to yellow. In fact, strong people are not dominant, because you obviously have good intentions and want to help others, but just because Your strong expression will be rejected by others

If you want to get into the other person's heart, you need to have more sympathetic chats with others. If you really want to get into the other person's heart, People who have a sense of purpose and speak strongly must learn to be soft, because soft communication is the most powerful, because your strength will make others feel uncomfortable, so if you want to get into the other person's heart, you must be full of emotion and gentleness to listen.

The fourth type: willing to be a green leaf, very popular, and the best listener

This type of person may not like to talk much at ordinary times, but as long as someone speaks, he can If you don’t want to speak, try not to speak, so we compare people with this expression to green. He doesn’t like to express or talk. He thinks about everything in his head. If he is not good at expressing, he is actually at a disadvantage. Because you have many opinions that are not known by others, but you are a good listener because you can hear what the other person wants, but what you need to learn is to speak bravely. There are four kinds of speaking 2

Four realms of speaking

The first realm: killing people when you open your mouth

In the world, there is a kind of person who speaks straightforwardly, We call this kind of person a bastard without any restraint. People who speak this kind of bastard often do not think carefully and just say whatever they want. They do not distinguish between occasions, places, men, women, old and young, and they do not consider themselves. Whether your words will be accepted by the other party, let it go as fast as you want. Although it sounds pleasant, it hurts the feelings of many people intentionally or unintentionally.

When a gunman speaks hurtfully, there are two consequences for different people.

If the person being hurt is a well-educated person, you will generally ignore him and not get along with him. But in subsequent interactions, they often adopt an avoidant attitude. If the person being hurt is a serious person or has a bad temper, he will often have to argue tit for tat, and he will also become an enemy.

It is said that it is better to dissolve enemies than to make enemies, and this way of speaking that kills people at the first word will only have two results: either you will miss a true friend, or you will get another one for no reason. enemy.

The second state: annoying as soon as you open your mouth

There is a joke: As soon as a slightly fat woman entered a clothing store, the sales girl said to her: Madam, You're too fat and we don't have anything for you to wear. Just as the lady was about to retort, the young lady added: In fact, it is better to be fatter when you are old. The woman was so angry that she didn't know how to react. At this time, the boss's wife came out from behind. The lady immediately complained: I provoked someone today. Why did you just enter the store and your clerk said I was fat and old?

The proprietress quickly apologized, but it was a second degree of harm, because she said: Our clerk is from the countryside and can’t speak very well, but what she said is all the truth.

People who speak straightforwardly say that they are telling the truth without any bad intentions, but they can also easily hurt others. In real life, many people are outspoken, have no pretensions, and never beat around the bush. Sometimes, such a person will be very popular because people think he is straightforward and easy to interact with. However, sometimes such a person is very troublesome because he always hurts others unintentionally and often puts others in trouble. , you blame him, he did it unintentionally; don’t blame him, he made you angry many times. This guy is a real headache.

The third realm: convince people by opening your mouth

There is a story in "Warring States Policy" "Touch the Dragon and Talk about the Queen Mother of Zhao". It is said that just after the Queen Mother Zhao came to power, the Qin State rushed to attack the Zhao State. At the critical moment, the Zhao State had to ask Qi for help, but the Qi State proposed a rescue condition that the Chang'an Lord should be sent to Qi State as a hostage. Empress Dowager Zhao, who doted on her children and lacked political foresight, refused to agree to this condition.

Zuo Shichulong knew that the Empress Dowager Zhao had just come into power, lacked political experience, was short-sighted, and had a unique female doting mentality. In a rage, any discussion of hostage issues would be difficult for the Empress Dowager to accept. Therefore, Chulong changed the subject, first asking about the Queen Mother's food, housing and transportation, then talking about her love for her children, and finally talking about the succession to the throne. Unconsciously, the Queen Mother lost all her anger, repented, and arranged for Lord Chang'an to be taken as a hostage in Qi.

No matter how high your speaking skills are, they are not as high as the word "reason". Speeches must be reasonable, acceptable to others, credible, and impeccable. The key to why Chulong's words finally convinced the Empress Dowager Zhao and was willing to arrange for Lord Chang'an to go to Qi as a hostage was that he was able to convince people with reason on the basis of emotion. Anyone who doesn't love their children should think long-term for the children. They should let the children have a foundation and not just rely on power and parents.

From an objective point of view, Chulong guides step by step, makes insinuations, understands the truth, and understands the reason. Not a word of the entire dialogue involves the hostage, but every sentence is inseparable from the hostage. The subtleties of language are revealed in the twists and turns, and the inevitability of things is highlighted while following the instructions.

The fourth realm: Make fun of others by opening your mouth.

There is a kind of person who speaks with his life. People in this state rarely say anything and don't need to say anything. He didn't say anything, and didn't make a sound at all. However, in the days to come, you will discover bit by bit that he actually said a lot. In fact, he is not far from convincing people with reason, but the former is a forced sale, while the latter is a free gift.

When you get something you don’t know yet. When you know that you have benefited and want to thank him, he has just drifted away. He doesn't even mean to give you anything, and he doesn't even know what he has given you, so you can regard all of this as your own insights. This is like a good movie. Everyone will have different insights and experiences after watching it, but the movie does not impose these insights and principles of life on you.

The highest state of speaking is "the unity of nature and man". A real master should communicate with you from a deep spiritual perspective, which is an emotional communication. At this time, language may be the most important. The ordinary and most inconspicuous ones are also the simplest and most touching. Perhaps his language is not fancy at all, but it can penetrate directly into people's hearts and express it appropriately without unnecessary elaboration. They have rich experience, are extremely cultivated and understanding, and can recommend themselves to others. Their words are based on their own accumulation and improvement, which can be heard by people around them and be extremely convincing. There are four types of speech 3

What a person says can be divided into four types

⑴Facts

Facts are only true or false, and are objective and independent of personal judgment. exist.

Facts are also the objective existence that is least likely to be disputed. Everyone can only agree in the face of facts.

Now it is a fact that it is raining, and it is also a fact that the clock points to 12 o'clock.

But in some cases, different people think that they have the facts and deny the other party’s facts. This makes it difficult to identify the facts. This situation can only show the understanding of the facts. , not comprehensive enough.

⑵Opinion

There is no right or wrong opinion.

Because opinion is your subjective view of a fact. It reflects the thoughts and ideas that are instilled in your mind, and it also explains what kind of person you are.

For example, if you say that work is tiring or the weather is hot, this is your personal opinion and a subjective judgment made from your own perspective.

And everyone’s thinking and ideas about things, as well as their knowledge and experience are different. Therefore, everyone is different, so their views on things are also different.

There is no right or wrong in opinion itself. This also reminds us not to argue with others about the right or wrong of opinions in life, but to discuss the facts.

⑶ Stance

Stance is the position and attitude you have when understanding and dealing with problems.

Position can affect a person's point of view.

Because everyone has a firm attitude toward their own position and is unwilling to be outdone.

Therefore, it is useless to argue about right and wrong with people who have a position, because the existence of the position involves the interests of the other party, and the other party will not admit that they are wrong no matter what.

Just like a lawyer’s position is to defend the defender and the purpose is to obtain attorney fees, then he must try his best to use all evidence that is favorable to his position and ignore, distort or slander all evidence that is unfavorable to him. , the only goal is to win the argument.

So don’t argue about right or wrong with people who have a position, but just win or lose.

Unless you have the same status and interests as the person asking you, it is impossible for you to achieve consciousness.

　⑷Faith

Although the word faith is a bit old, in fact everyone has his own faith.

Because faith is an individual’s internalization and compliance with a certain idea, or it is a belief or motto.

If a person believes that happiness and enjoyment are the most important things in life, or that people should live a positive life, this is belief.

If you think you have no faith, it can only mean that you have not discovered your faith yet, because faith is hidden deep in the subconscious mind.

And faith needs to be defended and firmly followed, so when talking to people with faith, do not judge the other person’s faith, as this is likely to anger others.

Because faith is the source of guidance for everyone’s life and words and deeds. If you deny the other person’s belief and say that the other person’s belief is wrong, unreliable and problematic, then the other person will definitely be angry. I'll have a big fight with you.

Because your comments are actually saying that what the other party has done and thought so far are wrong. As long as you are an ordinary person, the other party will definitely not accept this.

So if what the other person says is based on his or her own beliefs, then you’d better not argue with him about right or wrong. First of all, you will anger the other person, and secondly, you will not be able to win.