Why does the husband always favor the mother-in-law in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law

Why does the husband always favor the mother-in-law in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law

Why does the husband always favor the mother-in-law in the mother-in-law relationship? The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has always been the most important in marriage and family. If the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is very close, then the later marriage life will not be happy. How should the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law be handled? The following is the reason why the husband always favors the mother-in-law in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, for your reference.

Why does the husband always favor the mother-in-law in the mother-in-law relationship? Under normal circumstances, you and your husband have been together for several years, while your husband and your mother-in-law have been together for decades. It was her mother-in-law who brought up her first husband. Unless your mother-in-law is indifferent to your husband since childhood, your mother is generally eccentric. If you don't see the situation clearly and start complaining rashly, you may not get your husband's support, but you will make your husband feel that you are not sensible.

2, summed up in a cold sentence "none of your business, hang high", everyone has a common fault, that is, as long as it does not affect their own vital interests, they can avoid it. For example, it is normal for a mother-in-law to ask her daughter-in-law to wash dishes every day in her son's mind. It's just a matter of washing some bowls for a few minutes. Why do you think so? First of all, it's easy to wash the dishes for a few minutes, but most importantly, it's not him who washes the dishes every day, but his wife. So he thought it was simple. No big deal. If the mother-in-law or his wife says: xx, you have washed all the dishes this month. At this time, husbands will say with one voice: Why, why. Therefore, a clever daughter-in-law should not always complain, but let her husband feel the same way, and her direct interests will be affected. They will understand you and stand on your side.

3, do a face project, talk more about your mother-in-law in front of your husband, anyway, good words don't cost money. I often buy small gifts for my mother-in-law with my husband. Anyway, my husband pays them. Sure, heart for heart. Many things have nothing to do with me, so I told my husband that I wanted to wash the dishes, but I was uncomfortable. It's so cold, you wash the dishes, honey, don't let mom wash them. This pushes my husband out. It's not that I don't want to wash the dishes, but that I feel uncomfortable. You are in good health, but you let your mother do the dishes. A diligent husband washes himself, but a lazy husband won't move. Let his mother wash it. It's just a few bowls anyway. The mother-in-law complains in front of the children, and the husband will think it is just a few bowls.

4. The daughter-in-law's repeated complaints will also make her husband biased towards her mother-in-law. One thing has been made clear. My mother-in-law did something wrong, but my daughter-in-law still doesn't have the eye to complain repeatedly. Even if she says it in front of many outsiders, it will cause her husband's dissatisfaction and think that her parents and herself have no face. Even if he didn't say it at the time, he would still keep it in mind. A thoughtful man will find opportunities to help his parents get it back, which also triggers her husband's rebellious mentality.

5. An old saying ruined many daughters-in-law, "inherit the wind". In the hearts of many husbands, there is a belief that parents will not hurt their children and want them to be happy. But the husband forgot that the mother-in-law does not harm the child and hopes that the child will be happy, but the daughter-in-law is not her own. I even think my daughter-in-law took their son. Since then, the son has accompanied his daughter-in-law to eat, sleep and play. The son's hard-earned money was spent by his wife. I didn't expect my husband's money to be spent on his wife. These husbands don't think about it, and the daughter-in-law can't explain it clearly, and she is sad.

6. Many daughters-in-law have been doing all the housework, which is a tragedy, because no one will think you have worked hard, but that's what you should do. At this time, my mother-in-law was saying something. This is not done well, and that is not done well. Daughter-in-law will be unbalanced and complain. But in my husband's heart, I already think this is what you should do. If you can't do it well, of course you should make suggestions. So at this time, my husband will be biased towards her mother-in-law and think that you can't even do the most basic housework well. Therefore, in the family, if you want to do it, you should do it yourself, not let your husband do it. Let your husband participate in the daily housework, which will not only make him realize that housework is not so easy, but also increase his feelings. Mother-in-law can't bear her son's hard work, and she will also argue with you about housework. Kill three birds with one stone, be smart!

Why does the husband always favor the mother-in-law in the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law

1. No matter how unreasonable your mother-in-law is, don't quarrel with her.

Even if your mother-in-law is wrong again, it's your fault if you go to war with her. This is not asking you to be an ostrich. Although you are a woman in the new era, you can despise all stereotypes, but please don't forget that this is China, and this society still can't tolerate disobedient people. Although quarreling with her mother-in-law is not necessarily disobedient, in the eyes of others, being a younger daughter-in-law who spits on her old woman is disobedient! They will think that you have no tutor! If you say that you don't have a tutor, the target is not you alone, but your parents. Do you want to hear your parents being talked about for their own reasons?

The meaner your mother-in-law is to you, the more generous you are to her.

Mother-in-law's generation went through a very difficult period, so there will be a kind of meanness about money that people in the 1970s and 1980s can't understand. She usually lives frugally, and hopes that her son and daughter-in-law will get what they want, especially for their daughter-in-law. If you buy something for your husband, she may not say anything, but if you buy it for yourself, she will say that you spend money indiscriminately, or that what you buy is too expensive. This kind of mother-in-law is really hateful, but the daughter-in-law doesn't have to wronged herself for it. She can buy whatever she should, spend as much as she should, and don't have to bear a grudge against her mother-in-law, thinking that you are abusing me, and see how I deal with you in the future. In fact, many mothers-in-law do this not only because they are distressed by money, but also because of psychological imbalance. Think about how much they have suffered before, and they can't bear to eat or wear. The whole province came down to give it to their children, and the effect was good. What contribution does the son's wife make to his son? Now I eat well, dress well and use it well ... Even if my daughter-in-law spends her own money, my mother-in-law will have the feeling of "planting trees by herself and enjoying the cool by herself". For such a mother-in-law, the best way is to buy a gift for her mother-in-law, even if it is a very cheap small object, which can block her mouth. Although her mother-in-law will still say that you don't have to spend money for her, you can save some money or something, but you will be very happy.

Don't speak ill of your mother-in-law in front of your husband.

We don't like mother-in-law to speak ill of herself in front of her husband. Similarly, as mother-in-law, we don't like the daughter-in-law gossiping in her son's ear.

Especially now, many men are very filial. Even if he knew that his mother-in-law was wrong, he would say, bear with it, that's his mother! Unfortunately, it seems that many daughters-in-law, including myself, have met such a gnashing husband! In this case, you can't achieve your goal by speaking ill of your mother-in-law, and it is more likely to make your husband feel disgusted with you. After all, you love your parents very much, and your husband speaks ill of them in front of you. Can you promise that you won't jump up? But that doesn't mean we have to swallow our pride. At this time, we need to use our wisdom. You can create an opportunity for your husband to see how her mother-in-law bullies you. If you can, you might as well shed tears of injustice in front of him and leave the rest to him. If your husband is still so insensitive, don't mention it. Double the anger your mother-in-law gave you and vent it on him! Such a husband would be too sorry for his filial piety if he didn't invite him to eat "sandwich cookies" and was full!

If you live with your mother-in-law, don't run back to your mother's house because you are angry.

When writing this article, I actually envy my sisters who have a home to go back to. Because the home is in the field, there is basically no home to go back to, but it also saves parents' worries. Although I sometimes run back to my parents' home in a wronged way, it's quite refreshing that my husband can come and take you home humbly. Maybe your parents won't scold him, maybe they will condemn him with their eyes at most, but have you thought about his feelings? If this happens many times, every man will get bored and decide not to get used to your problems in the future, and this trick will not work. Especially the daughter-in-law who lives with her mother-in-law, don't make such a move easily. If her mother-in-law throws you a word, don't come back out of this door! Or your husband wants to show authority and say this to you in front of her mother-in-law. Are you going to walk out of this house without hesitation, or are you going to put down your luggage and go back to your room and cry? Even if you can go through the door and finally come back, aren't you afraid that the first thing your mother-in-law said to her husband after going out was "divorce her"? When a man who lives with his mother encounters this situation, even if he really wants to keep you or take you home early, he usually slaps his face and pretends to be fat in order to prove to his mother that he is a man. Not only will he not leave you, but he will say something more rude, or he will not take you home at all. Will you divorce him or pack up and go home? If you really don't want to go there and divorce him, then say something else. If you don't want to give him up, you have to go home by yourself. Isn't that shameful?

Of course, every woman has the right to run away from home without being reasonable, but can you be a little creative and change the location to another place? Personally, I prefer high-end hotels, and then I called him and said I didn't want my parents to worry, so I came to the hotel ... and then I ordered myself a delicious meal and waited for him to pick you up, hehe! I bet that 90% of men will run to the hotel when they receive this call. After all, it costs hundreds of thousands every day! Few husbands or mothers-in-law are not distressed. Maybe other 10% husbands don't care if they have money! Then run away, such as Hong Kong, Paris, Hawaii, etc ..., so that running away from home once is enough to impress him, and see if he dares to provoke you next time?

Don't speak ill of your mother-in-law in front of outsiders.

Maybe someone will scold me. Are you kidding? Being angry with my mother-in-law, I can't tell my husband, nor can I tell outsiders. Is there justice? Yes, it seems difficult to do this. Look at the blood and tears of the sisters in the forum and you will know how many bitter tears there are in the world as a daughter-in-law! And when friends get together at ordinary times, it seems that the evil mother-in-law at home is the one who talks the most! China's daughter-in-law is bitter! But outsiders here are specific, that is, people who know both themselves and their mother-in-law can complain on the forum, but if you speak ill of your mother-in-law in front of these people, aren't you afraid that your words will be embellished and passed on to her mother-in-law one day? It's true that we should not wash our dirty linen in public, but it's more important not to be looked down upon as Sister Xianglin. Even if you know that your mother-in-law speaks ill of you in front of outsiders, don't answer blows with blows, an eye for an eye. What's the difference between you and your mother-in-law with a long tongue? A smart daughter-in-law will be like this: my mother-in-law says my' bad' in front of people, and I will say my mother-in-law's good in front of people! Don't worry about being accused by your mother-in-law. Please be sure to believe this sentence: "justice is free from people's hearts." Your mother-in-law criticized you in every way, but you returned good for evil. Isn't it clear at a glance what is right and wrong? Wait until those people return your words to your mother-in-law's ear and see if she is ashamed to death!

6. Don't exaggerate your grievances in your husband's family.

There is no denying that every daughter-in-law will be wronged more or less in her husband's family, perhaps because of the other party's unintentional mistakes or intentional actions. Many daughters-in-law themselves can't resolve this resentment, so they will think about it and feel that they have been greatly wronged, and in the process, they will infinitely magnify each other's mistakes and lose sight of their responsibilities in the incident.

This may be because many daughters-in-law are isolated in their in-laws and have an instinctive sense of defense, so they are too sensitive to events related to themselves. Another situation is that some daughters-in-law have a delusion of persecution and always feel that the other party is up to no good. She is like smart, beautiful and kind Snow White, and her mother-in-law is a vicious queen. She won't stop until she kills herself, so she feels sorry for herself. A woman is a delicate animal, but sometimes this delicate feeling is "narrow-minded" in the eyes of her husband's family. I also think that some trivial things at home are not worth making a fuss about. The careless daughter-in-law thing has disappeared before, and the relationship with in-laws may be the most harmonious. As long as the in-laws don't attack or insult themselves personally, a clever daughter-in-law can pretend not to understand or laugh it off. So, sometimes you might as well be a smart silly elder sister, which may make you happier.

7. Be sure to find a suitable opportunity to show the essence of your tigress in front of your mother-in-law.

Everyone has a bad habit of bullying and being afraid of hard work, especially many mother-in-law now. The more docile you are in front of her, the more she thinks you are a soft persimmon that can be pinched at will. Of course, you can't quarrel with her, but this doesn't necessarily mean that you can't quarrel with others, but this person had better not choose your husband or anyone who is related to her. Give him a good scolding if you have the chance to catch the unlucky guy! Even if it is unreasonable to insist, at this time, you should show the worst and most vicious side of your personality incisively and vividly. Don't be afraid to carry the notoriety of a bitch, a bitch will splash women! As long as your mother-in-law can see, we are not without temper. We don't lose our temper with her not because we are afraid of her, but because we respect her as an elder! Take this as a warning to her: the tiger doesn't show off, don't treat me like a sick cat!