I want to find an article about my mother. I have seen it before, but I forgot. This may mean that when children grow up to be parents,

My mother in the rice field opened the curtains, and I held the night in my arms, often thinking of my mother at that time.

My mother had just turned 30 at that time. Mother put me on the ridge of the field and then walked into the rice field alone. She held a hoe in her hand, raised it above her head, and then fell heavily, and the black mud under her feet turned over and scattered all over the floor. A cold spring breeze blew from the ridge, and the mist seemed to devour mother's face. I stood on the edge of the ridge, feeling scared, cold and uneasy. I don't know why my mother works in the paddy field from morning till night, and I don't know what the sudden departure of my father means. I can only vaguely feel that my mother has haggard a lot overnight, and the blood bubbles on her hands are also very painful. It was dark that day, and my mother came out of the paddy field and saw me standing on the edge of the ridge and smiling. My mother smiled, too, completely forgetting the fact that my pants were wet with mud and my clothes were soaked with tears. My mother held my hand tightly and walked to the adobe house not far away. A series of footprints, large and small, were left on the slippery mud road, which was still legible even at night.

At that time, I was only three years old, and my hazy memory made me not know the pain and injury of losing my father. How many bits and pieces have blurred, even withered and faded, and suddenly disappeared. So far, how many details about my mother remain in my memory, and how many childhood dreams can be reproduced? I don't know. Only in the dark, when the blue sky and the stars are densely covered, I can see that it is the reflection of the rice field, and my mother is standing in the middle of the rice field, helplessly giving in to reality.

Why did the mother in the paddy field succumb to reality? My mother told me, but that was when I grew up. The pain of bereavement is like a ruthless sword inserted into the mother's spinal cord, and the mother is too painful to shout out. It is not the long night of life that tears overflow, but the hungry mouth on her knees. Mother couldn't forgive herself for giving in until she was in her sixties. ...

At the end of the Cultural Revolution. Mother is twenty-one years old. Unequal marriage pushed mother to the abyss. When the daughter of a "traitor spy" marries a peasant family, it is a beautiful thing that many people envy. Mom and dad don't have any feelings. Perhaps, the wedding night is the first time my mother saw her thin father. Mother got rid of the oppression of countless people, but she could not get rid of the oppression of poor life. Fortunately, at that time, my father knew how to hurt people. Mother giggled when her father passed on the warmth of her palm to her mother. In the evening, my mother sewed clothes under the kerosene lamp, and my father was knitting straw sandals. My father also asked someone to find a job for my mother-to substitute for the primary school in the village. Although there are only a few dollars a month, it ignites my mother's desire to study and allows the whole family to taste some meat every month. Father is the mother's only best support.

At that time, my mother's beautiful big eyes were like two paddy fields, watery and beautiful. Mother's watery eyes are like a bright lamp, illuminating those dark days. Unfortunately, before dawn, the bright lights went out, leaving mother in darkness again. No matter how dark the night is, mom must be awake. She knew she couldn't die of pain and follow in her father's footsteps. Big brother and big sister have become my mother's new pillar. As long as we are here, my mother can only try her best to live. Mother stayed up all night, her watery eyes became dim, but she kept waiting for the dawn.

In the third year after his father died, his mother married his stepfather. This became the slogan of the stepfather's villagers. How ridiculous it is for a widow to live with three children in the village. Mother and stepfather walked into the same rice field, and countless fingers were pointing, which made people's backs cold. But mother can't think about that. In her heart, no matter how tired she is, she can't let her child starve to death.

My older brothers and sisters are all growing up. Big brother and big sister also walked into the paddy field and stood side by side with their mother. I bring them water and rice. Because of the children's growth, the mother's hilly paddy field is getting wider and wider, as if to accommodate her life. Mother wants to get some spare money from that mountainous rice field, thinking that this spare money can improve the children's lives. Mother's sister often comes to the paddy field to help, and brings some candy or a handful of fried peanuts when she comes. Later, my mother learned that it was from my grandfather. Every once in a while, he wanted to know if his evil daughter and her children were still alive. So, grandpa was included in the paddy field.

My mother never dreamed that my stepfather was not only an animal, but also a good smoker with a cruel personality. The most important thing is that the stepfather is unwilling to give some money to his stepson to study. Mothers have to shoulder the burden of making money for their children to study. In addition to tending paddy fields in that hilly area, she must also grow vegetables, raise pigs and engage in the sideline of mountain people. Mother became more and more silent, and her words were almost replaced by tears and even blood. Mother gritted her teeth, that is, 100 Jin of courage was on her shoulders, but she still couldn't shout out the pain and swallowed her broken teeth. The mother can't cross the paddy field cultivated by herself on that hill, so she can only entrust the dream of crossing the paddy field to her children and look forward to it day and night.

When I was in junior high school, my family was too poor to make ends meet, and my mother and stepfather often fought. Although my mother has been trying to save family expenses, she has not won the sympathy of her stepfather at all, and the fighting has not decreased at all. Over time, there are countless scars on my mother's body because of the fight. Some of them have not recovered. Even if their appearance is healed, is there still blood in their hearts? Later, when my stepfather was old and his parents died one after another, my stepfather remembered that he should have a support. My stepfather was better to my mother. At this time, my mother has been nagging my stepfather in my ear and grinding my auricle into a cocoon. The problem of my stepfather's providing for the aged naturally pushed to me until my stepfather was old.

My mother has been standing in the paddy field on the hill all her life, and there is nowhere to escape. Mother wants to stay away from the hilly paddy fields, but the paddy fields are getting wider and wider. In order to raise three children, my mother stood in that hilly paddy field with unimaginable pain.

Many years later, my mother and I once again walked by the ridge of a paddy field in a small hill when we were children, but neither of us walked into the paddy field. The mother deeply knows that since the child has left the hilly paddy field, there is no reason to go in again. But I know that my mother's heart is still not out of the hilly paddy field, and her face is full of grievances and pains, revealing her heart at the moment.

In fact, with the passage of time and natural changes, hilly paddy fields have long dried up, and some weeds are faintly visible. My mother's life can't be repeated. Only when I am old, if my mother is still standing in that hilly paddy field, will I bow my back and carry my mother out as far away as possible, even if I am already white-haired!

In those years, the persistence of mother's guardianship

In those years, the persistence of mother's guardianship

She has been in Beijing for one hundred days, one hundred days of living in Beijing, and one hundred days of ups and downs, but it is no longer so profound.

If she has any goals or selfishness, the only ones worthy of her are her family, her children and her husband. For this simple and moving dream, she devoted her life to supporting her beliefs. Now, she is in Beijing, the richest Beijing. She stayed for one hundred days.

She comes from a village, from the foot of a mountain. In that poor but happy place, at the foot of that mountain, she stayed for 20 years, guarding the acres of fields and hills with her children and only children, 20 years of ups and downs, 20 years of unforgettable, 20 years of glory and 20 years of hard work. Write down a mother's myth in obscurity and without interest, and this myth will be priceless and accompany the child for life. Don't forget. ...

Twenty years ago, she came to Lianzi Lake, a family home surrounded by bamboo. She didn't have a flashy wedding, nor was it so formal. It's just a bicycle, some new boxes, a dowry, and the furniture of her new home. He made it himself, and it took several months ... The only thing that can make sense is the room full of guests, and the families of both sides are happily sitting together, getting together and being intimate. At the foot of Hushan Mountain in 2008, a shabby but helpless home, a few new tiles and a few adobe bricks, can be regarded as a place of home. The only thing I can say is the newly posted red happy character, which is particularly festive and eye-catching. She can't be so happy, she can't be so lucky, her time is doomed to pay, to pay to that side of the water and soil, to be happy for half her life, to support that family, to tear down the old ... but she is really happy and satisfied ... From the moment she stepped into the house, she was doomed to be incomplete ... This is life, and I don't know if it is a blessing or a tear ... It's just that she thinks all this is enough, the best, and the best.

In the following year, she didn't stay in that new home. She left and went to Guangzhou with him. Because of the pressure of life, he had to go out to work to support his family. /kloc-at the age of 0/7, he went out with an axe and a backpack. Now, the only difference is that he set off again with the joy of the wedding and went to that one. That year, she was in Guangzhou, living in a foreign land and sharing joys and sorrows with him. It was the first time for her to go to such a far place, the first time to leave home, not only by train, but also by sea boat, suffering from carsickness and seasickness. That year, they were very happy because he had endless work. Carpenter's job is particularly popular in Guangzhou. Because it is handmade furniture, they finally have a life. ...

The next year, perhaps because she loved to be born in the place where she grew up, she didn't go back to Guangzhou or go with him. At home, she became a full-time housewife, because a little life was coming. In order to make a living, he was still wandering outside, just worried. The child who is about to be born, is she okay at home? Maybe that's her choice. From the moment she decided to stay at home, she was ready to be an ordinary person. What is ordinary? Maybe it's boundless happiness. To live flatly is to be satisfied.

It was in the year when the child was born that she was at home, and she met all the needs of her family by herself, and a son supported all her family. Because she was a housewife in the countryside, she was always very bitter and tired, but the fate of all the left-behind women in rural Qian Qian was not so easy, which seemed to be no less than the fate of all those vagrants. However, people who are called mother-in-law are always confused. Use clearer words to describe her confusion, because she is confused, because she is still alive, everything seems to have nothing to do with her, hanging high ... including the upcoming child, it seems to have nothing to do with her! Therefore, summer, rural life and busy farming season are almost the time when everyone is scared when they hear it. It was in that season that all the fields were carrying the burden of rice, a few hundred kilograms of burden, and they were pregnant all the way, staggering and carrying the burden one step at a time. It's just that the mother-in-law never cares or can live like that, because in her eyes, the daughter-in-law seems to be doing those things. ...

So/kloc-I didn't eat a chicken or a tonic during the pregnancy in October. Although it is very bitter in the countryside, it is especially lucky for women with children, at least at home, with care and a good mother-in-law. This is a constant custom handed down from generation to generation ... and all this seems to be the opposite of her. She doesn't seem to have a chance, and she doesn't have a name.

In the end, the child came to this world with joy. There was not such a grand scene and not so much appreciation, but she was very happy and smiled knowingly. I don't know whether it was tears of relief or tears of satisfaction. At this moment, the whole family will live together, maybe it will be so happy in the future, or in the coming future ... This is her plan, beautiful thinking, and a reason for happiness that will not be far-fetched. For her, all this is enough to face the challenge of life, even if she does not have much material wealth to live a rich life, but in that case, it is also a kind of attachment.

In such a life scene, their family has experienced a lot, beautiful and painful, which is really not easy. Later that life, from two or three thatched cottages to a new building, was a two-story house, which she picked from a distance, so she had special feelings for that building, and it was to be used to raise an only child. After a year, the house was finally completed, just an empty shelf. Because for this house, the whole family is heavily in debt and has no money to decorate it, so they live that life on that shelf, waiting for the day when the economy is affluent, and then continue the grand home ... At least in her eyes, that home is unique. ...

Under such circumstances, life goes on and children grow up day by day. It's just that place, it's a remote mountain village, with no traffic and nothing. There are only mountains, bamboo forests, a small pond at the door, and endless rice fields in front of the door. It's boring. There are many animals and livestock as companions. There is no regret ... Those livestock at home have been with the children for a spring and autumn. Because of the remoteness, children have no playmates and are locked at home every day. There are two gates in the countryside, and children can never squeeze out, so several years have passed. ...

In a blink of an eye, it's time for children to go to school. That year, the child was seven years old and ran around with his newly bought schoolbag, but he didn't adapt. The children in the neighboring village are hot and cold to him, and he is also stubborn. Every time I cry, I go to school three miles away alone. But every time she doesn't feel at ease, she waits for the dawn to send her child to the neighboring village ... That's the way it is, every time she doesn't know what the child is thinking, and every time the child walks here or there alone, no one, always alone. No more, no less, but still alone. It's just that she doesn't know that children are destined to be lonely. Until later, loneliness belonged to him. It's just that she doesn't know that this child will face the same difficult fate as her ... maybe she will never forget this child ... her only child. Because the child is persistent, because the child is always alone, she is particularly dependent on her, but more often, she is still in the field ... the child will only come back late every night! It's just that she doesn't know that children often get lost because of unsociable reasons, so they will find their way home step by step very late. But in her eyes, children are always playful. The only strange thing is that every time, the children came back crying ... without saying a word, even if she picked up the broom, it was in vain ... once, because of the teacher's instructions, every student had to bring a broom and cleaning tools. Because I am young, I can't carry those things to the school three miles away, so I am very tired and have nothing. Because of this, she went to school to talk, but was called back by the teacher word by word. She doesn't read many books, and the culture of the second grade of primary school can't make children study hard. At least, those so-called tutors are nothing to children!

Being alone all the time, children are particularly afraid of teachers. For the sake of the teacher's words, he even dared to confront his mother, so every time her mother used bamboo poles to drive one paddy field after another ... It was another change of years from the time when the child could not outrun her to the time when she could not outrun the child. It's just that maybe one day she will know that the child always has to go his own way. She just improves her life and the life of her children, so every time she is in the field, she is working hard.

Later, the school changed, and the school became a place at home. It was particularly convenient for the children to come back, and she was relieved to go back and forth! Only that year, the child was always like that, and every time she seemed to be bullied, but that year, the unreasonable mother-in-law came to the end of her life ... silently. ...

Later, when the children went to junior high school, they basically didn't have to worry too much. Children are no longer as lonely as they were when they were young, and they are smiling every day ... In those years of junior high school, children became excellent and their grades became excellent. Everything seemed wonderful that year. Speaking of children, the child who went to junior high school, she is always very proud and her eyes are shining with happiness. This is her only pride, even if her parents are not good, so what? Enough, there is no reason to be unhappy, so every time, her eyes are always so satisfied, just a child … that lonely road continues …

Because each time is unique, she always has endless words for her children. Every time, she told them to study hard. The only thing she does every day is not to let them watch TV. She has no good culture, but she just understands that as long as the children study every day, everything seems perfect, simple and helpless. ...

In the third year of junior high school, she did a lot of work for her children to study hard. Among them, there is inevitably money running around. Even if her husband's money is enough for a family's life, his family is not the worst in that village! But for a better life, she still keeps looking for a job, and there are many things, including overtime. In the noodle shop, all day long, just for the salary of 20 yuan. She used all her money to buy milk and other nutrients, including good food, meat and many other things ... all of which she worked hard. But for this child who is told by the outside world, it is really generous ... It's just that it's not easy for children to know, so they always don't waste it. Every time he supports himself, he can't walk. That's the only thing he can repay, and the only thing that can make children have the motivation to learn. ...

In the third year, the child is in the third grade of junior high school. That year, the child finally left home. The child who is called the most promising key high school will eventually travel, because that kind of high school is the most promising, but in the end, the child will not be admitted smoothly. He failed completely. The only thing he doesn't understand is that a child who has always been excellent will face a life that doesn't belong to him because of one point. Since then, he is no longer excellent, he is no longer the most sensible child, in the senior high school entrance examination, failure is affecting the future, the family seems to be in trouble, tea does not think, rice does not think! All hopes were almost dashed at that time. ...

Later, because the child was still taking care of at home, he asked someone to find a relationship. For the first time, his family, proud of not asking others, humbly asked others for the first time. However, perhaps because of God's concern, life began. ...

From the moment the child went to high school, she began to live close to accompanying her. Because of the blow of the senior high school entrance examination, the child has been so cold and lonely. It doesn't seem to be angry, but fortunately, the child is no longer as sharp as before, and seems to have grown up coldly and quietly. From the first year of high school, the child goes home once a month, and she goes to school twice a week, Thursday and Sunday ... for three years, which is neither short nor long, but some of them know the blessings. ...

How many days and nights, she took on the big and small things at home alone, she had no elders, and there were only three of them left in this family. All the sustenance had gone to the grave, without thinking and love. Just like the stars and the moon, those moons and those lives seem so helpless in the face of many difficulties in life.

Among them, he is just an ordinary child, because she is afraid that she will have an impact on her children's future, so she always pays attention to every corner of her life and tries not to have an impact on her children. Because of the guilt in junior high school, she always thought that even if she was tired, she would not let her children go to work again. The only thing she can do is to keep her children at home.

Three years later, that summer, the child she trained for 20 years formally entered the sacred college entrance examination room. She was moved beyond words, perhaps because the child had left! Children don't stay around forever. ...

It's not three years ago, because she has thought a lot for three years, and there is no longer too much disappointment. It's just that she understands that sometimes life needs to be strong, and life is not so static. Just like her children, after experiencing many setbacks, he learned how to face what he missed, without tears or sadness, because at that time three years ago, he already knew what life was, the life of his mother.

The only unexpected thing is that the child really won't fail this time! So I no longer miss that home. This time, with the failure of previous years, he came, and he succeeded, completely, got everything back, and left with the highest score in the town, dozens of points higher than his peers. For family reunion, he chose a school in Beijing, where he has his father, a man who has devoted his life to his children. ...

On that day, the child left, went to Beijing, and went with him ... It was at that time that she smiled and was very happy, as if this was satisfaction. Both parents are happy in the end. How glorious it is for children to get what they don't have, what they lose and what they get. That smile, with 20 years of sadness and 20 years of pursuit and belief, seems to be the most relaxing time for her at that moment. However, there are countless tears in her eyes. Those memories, those times, really need to be remembered with heart. We are just floating grains of sand, at least she doesn't think so. For her, the so-called happiness means that the child is happy every day and he is healthy every day. In that case, she is particularly satisfied. ...

It was a very painful second half of the year, and I spent half my time adapting to life. If there is anything, it is that I don't have to worry about my children's study and future … it just seems that all this is not so pinned under such circumstances … what can a mother who has no goals and doesn't need to take care of her children do for herself? Perhaps it was at the end of 20 years that I discovered that I was not guarding that land. After all, I am still my own child and my own home. ...

Finally, a new year has begun. When the time started again that year, she finally put it down and went to the place where the children were … Beijing!

It's like going back to 20 years ago, when she came, but in the later time, those things she guarded, maybe ... even she didn't know. ...

There is a 20-year cycle. How many years can life be wasted and how many years can it be spent?

In those years, what my mother guarded was the persistence of that life? Even if you think hard, you have no regrets!