Love is the meanest and meanest sad mood phrase.

1, want to see the past clearly, and then look down. That's all!

2. Your world has nothing to do with me; You only deserve to see my world.

Happiness is not given by others, but mastered by yourself.

4. Forget a person, not without thinking about it, but once you think about it, there will be no waves in your heart.

I have seen thousands of people who like your hair and eyes, but not your face.

6, you don't love me, it doesn't matter! I can always make you love me.

7, sister, very generous! I'm happy to fulfill your shameless happiness!

8, a person, just a person! Nothing, I'm fine!

9. I often change your signature, but you never look at it.

10, don't take the reason why I love you as your despicable reason-you don't deserve it.

My heart is lost in your world.

12, whisper to yourself: I'm fine, I don't hurt!

13, it will clear up after the rain, but when will my love clear up!

14, I'm not as gentle as you want, as considerate as you want, and I don't blame you for not loving me.

15, falling in love will not delay your study. If you find a good partner, your study will progress. What really delays learning is lovelorn and unrequited love.

16, sometimes, what we miss is not time, but feeling.

17, I love you, but I despise you, I won't care about you!

18, I don't need to compromise myself to please anyone, and I'm not that great. I don't care whether I like it or hate it.

19, a man who can bend down to help you tie your shoelaces is always better than a man who can only help you undress.

20, I don't understand, you marry (marry) then don't marry (marry), marry (marry) I will die!

2 1, ok! You don't love me, it doesn't matter! You will regret it one day.

22. When I don't want you, I just squat in the corner and cry!

23. Even the best things will always expire. So is love.

24. Isn't it just lovelorn? Who has never been lovelorn when he was young!

25. Your value to me is that I still love you. When I don't love you, you are worthless to me!

Talk a little cheap.

Talk a little cheap.

1. My husband and his daughter-in-law are sleeping in bed. He saw his daughter-in-law lose a hair, so he picked it up and put it on himself. Daughter-in-law said: Why are you pulling my hair? Husband said: pretend you interrogate me and ask me where this hair came from! She said seriously: Tell me honestly, where did this hair come from? The husband said calmly, What's on the pig?

Second, mom, give me some money to spend! Why? Today is Children's Day! You little brat, who said that Children's Day costs money? Don't! But when Grandpa Tomb-Sweeping Day was here, you burned money!

The doctor told the patient earnestly: If you want to live a long life, you really should give up smoking. Patient: It's too late to quit now. Doctor: How come! It's never too late to quit smoking! Patient: Well, then there is no need to worry.

Fourth, married for two years, no children. One day when I was shopping, I saw a pregnant woman passing by, and some envied to show my wife at once. My wife took a look and said that she was so big when she was full. I am speechless. .

My son is looking at the bear. I saw that the scene was winter, so I asked: Why don't bears hibernate in winter? Son: I have no time to film all day!

Sixth, the life of high-end people, ordinary people like me really can't enjoy it. Yesterday in a star-rated hotel, it was clear that I had finished defecation and wiped it clean, and the waiter at the door handed me a towel. I had no choice but to go back and wipe it with a towel, fold it and return it to him. . .

7. My colleague drives a new BMW to work. An unmarried female colleague asked whose BMW it was, and her colleague said it was his brother-in-law's. Hearing this, she immediately asked: Is your brother-in-law seeing someone? Introduce me.

Eight, when shopping, I bought a scratch music and won 400. I ran home happily all the way and told my wife that after a long time of happiness, my wife said, hand it over.

9. Take my nephew to our company to play. Colleague Xiao Zhang warmly brought my nephew juice to drink. I said to my nephew: Uncle brought you delicious food. What do you want to say to your uncle? Unexpectedly, my nephew pointed to Xiao Zhang and said that a drink is not enough. Go ~ ~ and bring me something delicious.

Ten, the neighbor child, that is, when he was seven or eight years old, his grandfather died, and his father cried. His brother ran over and said to his father: Dad, you don't have a father, I can be your father. . . It was a heavy blow for his father to hold him.

Eleven, received a phone call: eldest brother, I just got into a fight, you call 20 brothers to come over. Okay, who? Buy some fruit baskets and sincerely apologize.

12. I met the manager of a construction company and was told that there is no project that our company can't eat! Gai Lou, install the elevator and paste all the tiles related to the building! I asked weakly, big brother, I want to install an elevator for Mount Everest. Make a price! Manager: Me: If you really can't do it, tile the Great Wall! As much as you want.

Thirteen, the miser's wife died, and the miser cried her eyes out. A undertaker was very moved and said to the miser: Look at you like this, I know you and your wife have a good relationship. Miser: Can you? When she was alive, she nagged about something every day, so I didn't have to buy TV and radio. Now that she is dead, who can let me watch TV and listen to the radio for free?

Fourteen, watching TV with my wife at home during the holiday, she suddenly said to me, dear, can we not be apart in this life? I was moved to nod, only to see that she took a pear from behind and chewed it herself. It was the first time that she was paralyzed, saying that eating alone was so sensational that life was all routine!

Fifteen, one day my father and brother went to pull goods, and when it was time to eat, they went to a restaurant for dinner. Dad fell down loudly as soon as he entered the restaurant; Boss, two bowls of Daoxiao Noodles. After a while, the boss brought two bowls of noodles. While eating, my brother looked at the menu posted on the dining room wall. When he saw that it said egg soup and ribs soup, he said, Dad, let's have a bowl of soup. My dad didn't look up and said loudly; Boss, a bowl of noodle soup.

Sixteen, Jiang Taigong was fishing. A passerby saw it and asked curiously: Why do you fish with a straight hook? Jiang Taigong gave him a white look and said, You haven't studied physics, have you? It will bend in water!

Seventeen, a man has a crush on a woman for a long time, and one day he finally got up the courage to confess to the girl. M: Please accept my love and be my girlfriend. Woman: Sorry, I don't like you! Man: I had feelings for you the first time I saw you. Don't you have any feelings for me? Woman: Yes! Thank god! Woman: It's just that I feel nauseous!

Eighteen, the doctor said that at 3: 30 in the afternoon, we should hold our urine and do color Doppler ultrasound. I am obedient, and I can't hold it any longer. . . Why are you telling me in front of more than 20 people? You want to suffocate me! ! !

Nineteen, a sister paper broke up with her boyfriend because of greed. I asked her: How do you feel now? She said: My heart is broken like a potato chip!

Twenty, my cousin is in hospital for surgery, and I will accompany him. At noon, the nurse took his temperature and asked him how many times he peed in 24 hours. He slept in a daze and asked, does the urine he took when defecating count?

On February1day, a new bath center was opened nearby. The guest asked the boss: Why is there no water in the swimming pool or in the shower? The boss said: the bathhouse I run is a dry cleaner.

22. A man wanted to go to the railway station, but he got lost. He asked a child with a schoolbag on his back: Hello, little friend, can you tell my uncle how you got to the railway station? Child: My parents took me there.

Twenty-three I went to buy a bag and gave him twenty dollars. The boss insisted on 2 1 dollar. I have no choice but to open a cigarette and hand it to him. I'll never forget the way the shopkeeper looked at me leaving.

Twenty-four, pick up the bride, be stopped, ask the groom to kneel down and bark like a dog. The groom relented and knelt down and cried. The woman continues to make trouble and has to pay 88888 to get in! Begging for a long time, the door won't open. The groom is helpless, bite his teeth and say, go home, don't pick up! So I really have to go! The woman was dumbfounded and quickly called the groom. The groom's father answered the phone and told her directly: Let the two children go to the Civil Affairs Bureau to get the divorce certificate tomorrow! The bride is in pain.

Twenty-five, Lu Yu female colleagues on the way to work, female colleagues happily carrying a brand-new mink bag and I walked together on the road. I pointed to her bag, and she proudly said, new! I pointed to her bag again, and she said, it's not expensive, only over 20 thousand! I said, the phone in your bag has been ringing for a long time. Are you deaf? !

Twenty-six. Mrs. Li is 70 years old and her wife has been dead for many years. Not long ago, the neighbor wanted to introduce her to an object of similar age. Mrs. Li asked her neighbor: What's his personality like? Neighbor replied: character is absolutely no problem! Mrs. Li then asked, What does it look like? Neighbor replied: he is also very handsome! Mrs. Li asked again: Is it high? Neighbor replied: high, three high!

Twenty-seven, people with more money go home less, people with more looks wear less, people with more ideas succeed less, people with more success live less, people who study more have less thoughts, lovers have more peace and less sleep, friends have more difficulties, and jokes have more depression.

Twenty-eight, I finally got home after sitting on the train for eight hours. I can finally celebrate the New Year with my parents this year. My parents don't seem to like me very much. Just entering the door, my parents said, what are you doing back? Why don't you go back to the construction site? Me: I will accompany you for the New Year when you come back! Dad was angry and said, it's only May, so you don't want to go out to work?

The first time I went to a restaurant with my girlfriend, I was a little nervous. My girlfriend asked for a cold cucumber. After serving, I put a cucumber on my girlfriend's plate and said, come on, eat it while it's hot.

Wife: The woman in front is very beautiful. Dave: I don't think so. Wife: You are so lacking in aesthetics. Dave: Yes, that's why I often praise you for your beauty.

3 1. Pick a mobile phone. Later, the owner sent me a message saying: The mobile phone is yours, please give me the card back. Then I sent him a message saying: you can take the card, please give me the charger! He agreed, and we made an appointment to meet in the park, and then I was beaten and my cell phone was gone.

Thirty-two, a suspension spring. I dropped the second hand of my watch and took it to be repaired. After the repair, I asked the watch repairer: How could the second hand lose the master's eyes for no reason? You are shaking too much. Change hands over there in the future.

Wife: Honey, the season has changed. I want to buy clothes. Me: Are you obedient? Wife: disobedient! Me: I won't buy you a wife if I don't listen: then I will listen! Me: Be obedient! We won't buy it. Wife: Ni Mei, I haven't changed the season. It’s your turn. I dare say, buy buy, buy it.

Thirty-four, my niece is over 4 years old, and she often speaks amazingly. One day, her father was watching ghost movies in his arms, and my little niece probably didn't dare to sleep at night. After going in and out of the room several times, I went to see my parents, and then pointed to her father's nose and said, today you sleep on the sofa, and I want to sleep with your wife!

I'll never forget what the photographer told me when I took a photo: Beauty, please stretch your neck as far as possible. We can't repair your double chin.

Thirty-six. I went to see a doctor when I was ill. The doctor prescribed several medicines for me, but I was too bitter to eat. The doctor persuaded: How can I refuse to accept it? Then I still refuse to accept my stubbornness. I didn't expect him to hit me on the head with a brick: why the fuck did you hit me! The doctor sneered, hehe, bricks cure all diseases.

Thirty-seven, physical examination, urine test, everyone sent a small cup, just a little inside. But I saw a young man with a full cup in his hand, struggling to go to the doctor and carefully putting the cup down. The doctor looked at him straight and said, young man, are you here to propose a toast?

Wife: Honey, go down and turn off the lights. Husband: I have taken off all my clothes. Go down and turn it off. Wife: Oh, oh, you close your eyes for a minute. Wife: Well, I'm undressed now. You can go down and turn it off.

39. I haven't had a girlfriend before, and it's nice to see someone else have a girlfriend to persuade me to quit smoking. So I started smoking, waiting for the person who told me to quit smoking to appear. It was not until many years later that I met my present partner. I still remember that she opened the mouth first: hey! Give me a light.

M: I like coffee. W: I like drinking water. M: I like playing CS. W: I like reading novels. M: I like to look at beautiful women. Woman: Me too. M: We always have something in common. Woman: Yes. Man: I'm telling you, once I bumped into a beautiful woman and ran into a post. Woman: What's this? In order to see beautiful women conveniently, I even had sex change surgery.

Hello, I live in room 8 16. The quilt in my room is a little damp. Thank you, sir. You have a good eye. This is really the latest style this year.

Forty-two, blind date with my buddies, pure diaosi, and I won't say anything when I see a beautiful woman. As a result, I had a heated conversation with that girl. It was very cold and the girl sneezed. As soon as I saw the opportunity, I poked my brother: Show something. The goods scratched their heads for a long time and said, it will clear up when dogs sneeze. . .

Forty-three, a man went out and met a flower seller in Xiong Haizi. . Child: Uncle, uncle, buy a flower for your sister. Me:. . . It's my brother's child: uncle, uncle, buy a flower for my brother. Me. . .

Those cheap networks

1, mental patients have a wide range of ideas, and mentally retarded children have more fun.

2, since I hacked you, the internet speed is fast! ! !

3, cheese is power-bacon

If you are healthy, it will be a bolt from the blue.

My quilt is sick today, so I will stay in bed and take care of her.

6. Don't shock the world with coquettish, but seek shameless action.

7. Many people eat by their faces. I don't know. I depend on my mouth.

8. Every woman who laughed and said poof was a hard-working pea shooter in her last life.

9. I don't believe that my rural cucurbit can't be the Altman of your city.

10, do you want a straight coffin or a sliding coffin?

1 1. Women's paper like me has no weight that can't stand beauty.

12, computer, come on! Let me go! I have homework! ! !

13, if my life is a movie, you are a pop-up advertisement.

14, you must have been homeless in your last life, and you have to live like this in your life.

15, hello, I am very busy now, and I can't contact you in my life!

16, I have never met, I have never been masked, I have never met you, but I passed you by, I have never met you without a mask. Life is so wonderful!

17, I like that confident, proud and beautiful self, but I don't like this self-abased, sad and unattractive self now! Always helping others, disgusting yourself, so lucky to do anything, it is better to disgust others and help yourself.

18, one day, I got used to your frankness, and you guessed my duplicity. We smile at each other, hold hands and grow old together.

19, life is really short, I really want to cherish the present, but I can't stay in the past!

20. With a person, if the energy he gives you is to get up happily every day, sleep peacefully every day, be motivated to do everything, and be full of expectations for the future, then you don't love the wrong person. The most appropriate feelings will never torture each other in the name of love, but accompany each other and become each other's sunshine.

2 1, I hope to have a job that is not boring, meet an ugly person at a very old age, have a leisurely love, have a quiet wedding, have a lovely baby and spend my life peacefully. What I want is always simple.

22. People will meet about 29.2 million people in their lifetime, and the probability of two people falling in love is 0.000049. So you don't love me, I don't blame you.

23. Life is to joke with me again and again. Although it is not a thrilling life, it is also a hundred days of trauma.

24. There is no direction in my heart, and I am escaping everywhere.

25. The only thing you can't cheat in the world is your own heart, which always exposes your joys and sorrows when you least expect it.

26. Be brave enough to give up something for the life you want. There is no justice in this world, and you will never please both sides. If you want freedom, you have to sacrifice safety. If you want to loaf around, you won't get the grades evaluated by others. If you want to be happy, you don't have to care about the attitude of people around you. If you want to move forward, you must leave your present position.

27. When you have no choice but to be under too much pressure, remember to smile at yourself in the mirror and say: I'm sorry, but I will definitely make you happy.

28. Don't always evaluate your position in the eyes of others. To live in the eyes of others is equivalent to losing yourself.

Very cheap, very cheap.

Very cheap, very cheap.

First, the queen is unwell, her face is pale and her abdominal pain is unbearable. After the diagnosis, the doctor thinks that the queen is ectopic pregnancy and must be operated immediately! The emperor said: the queen accompanied Lian every day and never went out of the palace. How can it be an ectopic pregnancy? Somebody please. Pull this nonsense quack out and cut it!

Second, go shopping with my sister and her daughter, and the little guy is sitting in the shopping cart! While my sister was looking at the goods, I pushed the shopping cart away! Who expected this little guy to shout for help! Other people's eyes wronged me.

I went to daming temple to burn incense. When I make a wish, I silently think about my loved ones and ask the Bodhisattva to bless me. When I got home, I found that I forgot to ask the Bodhisattva to bless my wife. . . Later, I thought, my wife is so tenacious that she should not need the blessing of a bodhisattva. . . .

My wife used to be cruel to me, so I let her learn Sanda and judo. What about now? Much better now. Give me a bow before you hit me!

5. Go for a walk in the park with my friends. When I was turning the corner, a child ran out of the flower stand next to me, then hit him in the face with a water gun and ran away. Then the buddy chased him. I said, forget it, that boy doesn't understand, so why argue with him? No big deal. Who knows my buddy is even more excited and says to me: Shit! It's urine

6. When I saw a beautiful woman in the library, I went forward to strike up a conversation: Hello, classmate, introduce myself. I'm in the computer department, and you? She looked at me and smiled: I have nothing to do with you. Damn, what a witty sister.

7. My girlfriend's best friend is a real witch. She often asks me about my girlfriend's bed. When she's bored, say she's menstruating. This girl suddenly said that I would take you to my house to play and make sure you float downstairs! I just want to ask, can I go?

8. In the morning, the couple went to the street. Wife: Honey, the cold wind is howling. Where is the coldest place on your body? Husband: Face Wife: But why doesn't my face feel cold? Dave: Why don't you try it without makeup tomorrow morning?

9. Ms. Lin came to the electronics store and asked: The car has a car remote control, the mahjong has a mahjong remote control, and the fan has a fan remote control. Do you sell your husband's remote control? Shop assistant: The remote control is an accessory, not sold separately. It is equipped by the machine manufacturer. Ms. Lin: Then where can I buy it? Shop assistant: of course, go to your husband's factory and buy it at your mother-in-law's house!

10. Watching the Romance of the Three Kingdoms with my wife, I said smoothly: What do you think I can do in the Three Kingdoms? The wife said leisurely: Tie it to the grass boat and borrow an arrow! Me. . . .

In class, the absent-minded Luca was named by the teacher. The teacher said, Luca, why don't you answer? Is my question difficult? Luca said: Oh, no, I totally understand this question, but the answer is very difficult for me.

Twelve, today's children really can't teach. Today, I told my son: People only have one life, so we should cherish it. The son actually replied: Don't you know how to cherish it if you lose it?

Thirteen, roommate bask in the quilt, the static electricity on the quilt shocked him. I didn't expect the goods to say: Don't you dare to shock me, believe it or not, I'll sleep with you at night. .

14. Sister-in-law took her little niece who was obsessed with money to the clinic for an injection. The doctor prescribed three bottles of intravenous drip, and my niece began to play. After drinking two bottles, my niece began to make trouble and said nothing. Sister-in-law had a brainwave and said to her niece, I'll buy one of the two bottles. The niece bowed her head and thought for a moment and said, OK!

Fifteen, I asked a classmate who was a teacher: Everyone said that there was any love between teachers and students. Did I chase you? The teacher said: whether anyone pursues is a matter of level, and accepting or not is a matter of personality; To be a teacher, one should not be low in level or bad in character.

Sixteen, quarreling with my girlfriend, I said angrily: There are thousands of women in Qian Qian, and I have money to change every day! That stupid x actually said: men in the world are looking for it casually, and I still do it without money. I'll go. .

Just the other day, I chased a girl and bought her breakfast. I knew her dormitory number, so I sent it to the dormitory door. My sister just didn't come out to get it, so I left it outside her dormitory. After I left, she came out to get it and found it next to her dormitory. Did I put it in the wrong place?

When dating, the girl asked: What do you do? Me: I'm in charge of all the people who come in and out of the company. That girl hasn't contacted me since. Later, I heard that she thought I was a janitor, but I was actually HR.

Nineteen, go to dinner with friends and meet a great waiter. I ordered a stewed chicken with mushrooms. My friend asked: Are you serious about chicken? The waiter said: Chai Chicken is indeed Chai Chicken. I really don't know if it's serious.

Twenty, the company draws a lottery and draws a water margin card. Lao Wang shouted: I got the glory of Xiao Lihua! Manager: Send a pair of bows and arrows! Lao Li shouted: I drew Lu! Manager: Send a string of beads! I shouted: I have drawn Wu Dalang, manager, will you find me a beautiful wife? The manager said with a smile, send a cuckold!

Twenty-one, the front is dark bicycles and tricycles. The car finally found a tractor in the crowd. I quickly stepped forward and patted him on the shoulder: Brother, I finally found someone to talk to. The tractor knocked off his hand and said, Come on! Who is your brother? I talked about it earlier. Look at you, you can only breathe with your ass!

Twenty-two, I think my mother is crazy. For physical reasons, my period is always unpunctual. When I have a boyfriend, my mother asks me to be late n times a day. Are you there? ! I have no boyfriend now. I am ten days late. I told my mother that I wanted to take some Chinese medicine to recuperate. My mom told me it was okay. No conditioning is needed, and sanitary napkins can be saved. Ten times a year is good.

Twenty-three, go to a unit for an interview and go to the personnel department. When my ex-girlfriend was sitting there, we looked at each other meaningfully and passed by the planning department. I went and my ex-girlfriend was there. Boss, you don't want to tell me directly Why are you doing this whole thing?

Twenty-four, I took a taxi two days ago and talked with the driver in the car. Speaking of losing my mobile phone, the driver said, from the end of the year to now, I have found seven mobile phones and returned them to others. that this is not the important question. The point is that I left my cell phone in his car when I got off the bus. Call my cell phone. He hung up the first time it rang. When I call again, I'm so tired!

25. A painter wanted to paint a portrait of Wukong. Wukong took off his clothes and stood in front of the painter. The painter looked at Wukong and said, You'd better put on your clothes and I'll draw for you! Wukong asked: Why? The painter said: You don't have to draw this kind of monkey hair when you put on your clothes, it will be faster!

Twenty-six, boss, the unpaid workers are here again. What a bother. If it weren't for today's New Year's Day, we wouldn't even be able to move the broom. I really want to sweep them all out at once. However, the broom has been taken away by the cleaner and compensated!

27. The furthest distance in the world is that I look at you frequently on the bus and you look at me frequently. I fell in love with you at first sight, but you clung to your wallet.

At twenty-eight, Xiao Ming came home from school and had guests at home. His mother introduced him: This is my cousin. Cousin. This is my cousin. Cousin, this is cousin. Why are they all ideograms? Dad, I was slapped by my mother. Xiaoming cried in grievance. Yes, Xiao Ming said while crying.

Twenty-nine, my son called his classmates' parents to take him to the haunted house. He also wanted to go. I said, no, you are too young to scare you. My son insisted on going to the haunted house on weekends. I thought the child would be scared, but I didn't expect to shout when I came out. I thought ghosts were terrible! Stop! Not as scary as when my mother is angry! ! !

Thirty, Xiong Haizi just went downstairs to school, very naughty. Grandparents told him to study hard, and he said, what should I do if I study hard and get admitted to Tsinghua? I heard that tuition is very valuable. Can we afford it? His grandfather said: study hard, if you can afford it, don't worry! Xiong Haizi: You are a liar. I asked you for a dollar this morning, and you said we had no money!

Thirty-one, a person interviews a college student. In fact, half of the boys said they had never seen av, and most of the girls also said they had never seen AV. They also said that although they haven't seen it, they know that all boys have seen it and all boys like it.

Wife: Honey, do you have joint contracture? Me: Why do you say that? Wife: Don't you think your arms are getting shorter and shorter? When we first got together, you could still hug my waist. Me. . .

Man: You are so beautiful that I don't know how to express my love for you. W: Use the money. Man: Our love is pure, how can it be related to money! W: Then use diamonds.

34. Dad, why don't you call me by my name and call me little thing every day? Why? Son, things just mean cute. Because you are young and lovely, I call you little thing. Oh, I think dad is cute, too. From now on, I'll call you old stuff. . .

Wife: Put it on! Husband: It's better not to wear it. Wife: It's safer to wear. Husband: Trust my skills. Wife: I won't let you go without it. Husband: You look like a man without it. Wife: Are you bored? Will riding a motorcycle and wearing a helmet kill you?

Thirty-six, the man went home on a business trip without telling his family. When he reached the door, he secretly put his ear to the door and eavesdropped on the conversation inside. The son said, mom, I miss dad so much! Mom: Come on, let's call dad! The man was moved to tears outside, so he took out his mobile phone and waited for half an hour, but the phone didn't come. . . But it's hot inside.

The difference between my husband and me is that he watches country love and I watch Korean dramas! The voice is louder than one. I want to wipe my tears with a paper towel when I watch it. He is laughing there! The contest between ice and fire!

A Guang bought a kitten and liked it very much. But the kitten is very naughty, so A Guang teaches it: all lambs know that they are kneeling to feed, and all crows know that they are feeding back. I feed you delicious food every day. Why don't you know how to repay me? Unexpectedly, the next day, A-guang's desk appeared, with half a mouse left.

Thirty-nine, just go to the toilet, next door to a wonderful work, while squatting on the phone. It says, "Honey, I'm eating. I'm eating. It's delicious. I'll take you to try it another day. All right. Goodbye, baby! "

Forty, in summer, the dog at home got a skin disease, and the wife washed it with Fuyanjie, and the effect was very good. One day, my wife went to buy Fuyanjie for the dog. The clerk came and said it would be faster to use some topical ointment after washing. My wife thought about it, and seriously said, you can't lick it with ointment! The clerk's eyes were about to drop, and the wife realized that she had been misunderstood and explained, I mean, my dog can lick! ! Honey, did you really explain it clearly? !

Forty-one, watch two kindergarten children play a guessing game. One child takes a ping-pong ball and three cups, covers the cups in turn, and lets another child guess after the ball moves. Another child can always guess every game! I looked at it and wanted to say: children, you can't play this game with a transparent cup!

42. Ask my husband: If you have money, will you buy me a plane to go to work? Husband said: Yes. I said, you have so much money and you still let me go to work? What if someone makes me angry? Husband said: if you see an unhappy person, hit him with a plane!

Forty-three, a buddy showed off his shiny watch to the opposite sister and said, Good watch. A few days ago, it was more than 20 minutes slow, less than five days! I hold back my internal injuries!

Forty-four, a husband and wife are at odds. The man didn't speak at first, but suddenly he spoke: First, we are husband and wife! Second, we have received higher education, knowledge, culture and literacy! Third, you said you were going shopping today, and you said you didn't want to go shopping! Why are you angry with me? The woman looked up: I am very happy.