Funny short sentences (funny short sentences that make you laugh)

1. Do you know why beautiful women have been unlucky since ancient times? Because no one cares how long an ugly person lives.

Second, other people's faces are destined to be seven points, three points by dressing up, one point by your face, and nine points by the filter.

Third, men can't find a girlfriend, so they can only tell their fortune. Fortune teller: You are doomed to have no women in the first half of your life. The man's eyes lit up: What about the rest of his life? Fortune teller: You'll get used to it for the rest of your life.

Fourthly, I finally know why I wear a mask, not because of germs, but because I am afraid of meeting people with bad breath.

5. If you are fat, you love to eat meat. What happened? It took tens of millions of years to climb to the top of the food chain, not to eat vegetables.

6. My wife asked me: If a female colleague seduces you, will you listen? I smiled and shook my head, ha ha, who do you take me for? Am I the kind of person who will tell you what you really think?

I asked Buddha Zu: Is there true love in this world? Buddha said: am I still a monk?

Eight, go to the bank in summer, one is to rub the air conditioner, and the other is to look at the balance, and the body and mind will suddenly be much cooler.

One day, I was driving through a residential area, and a little boy kicked my car. When I got off the bus, I gave him 5 yuan to encourage him to fly and kick the big truck next time.

10. What do you mean, do not hesitate to die? Is to be angry 10 thousand times a day, but still don't give up.

1 1. I saw an old woman lying on the ground today. I don't know if I should help her. I just want to go up and help her The old lady said, "Go away, poor boy, and don't disturb my business."

12. My son failed in the middle school entrance examination and was scolded by his wife. I went to comfort my son: "study hard and you will definitely surpass your father in the future." The son came weakly: "I can't guarantee anything else. However, it is still very sure to find a better wife than you in the future. "

Thirteen, there are many things that you couldn't figure out at that time. Don't worry. Think about it later, and I won't remember.

Fourteen, the boudoir quarreled with her boyfriend and gave me the fruit she bought for her boyfriend. I said, "Don't leave some for my boyfriend?" She said, "Give it to the beast, not to him!" "

Fifteen, I feel that this society is getting better and better, and everyone is very sensible. Boys are very sensible and want to take care of more girls as soon as they have money. Girls are also very sensible, knowing that boys have no money and will not be with this boy, fearing that he will work hard.

Sixteen, why do you want to quarrel? Can't we just sit down calmly and cut each other a few times?

Seventeen, the mentality of "just a dozen dollars, just buy it, don't worry" has cost me tens of thousands so far!

18. I went shopping in the supermarket today and saw that the shopping carts of two monks were full. I thought monks were really rich. When I checked out, the cashier asked him if he would pay in cash or by credit card. A monk said, we are here for alms.

A friend described his reason for leaving his job like this: My job is cheap and plentiful.

Twenty, some people say that life is daily necessities, some people say that life is a mess, and I am more special. One is struggling to survive and hasn't lived yet.

Twenty-one, forever strong mother finally admitted her mistake to me today! She said helplessly, "I really regret not letting you fall in love earlier." It used to be an opportunity, but now it is a good thing! "

Twenty-two, there are only three things that hurt people: troubles, quarrels, and empty wallets. And the most hurtful thing is an empty wallet.

Twenty-three, I have lived for twenty years, and now I know that it is the fallen leaves that can represent autumn. What can represent winter is snowflakes. It is flowers that can represent spring. Can represent summer, you will know if you don't order mosquito-repellent incense tonight!

My mother works in the kitchen and tells me to take out the garbage. I don't want to, because my dad is idle, he mumbles, "My husband doesn't need to use someone else's husband." My mother looked back at me and said, "Your own son doesn't need it. Why use someone else's son?"