The funniest joke in history

1, before getting married, people were embarrassed to go out without a thousand and eight hundred. After getting married, I feel that it is very hard to go out and install hundreds of couples!

2, three stupid things in life: one is to reason with the boss, the other is to reason with the mother, and the third is to reason with the wife.

3, a school scum puppy love, was called to the office by the class teacher to talk. After several hours of gradual enlightenment and persuasion, the class teacher finally understood the reason why he had been unable to find a girlfriend in his thirties.

The most classic sentence my mother said is: I have bad luck in my life and met you two liars! Your dad cheated on you! You cheat money!

Get up in the morning and say to my mother, "I will buy a pair of sunglasses tomorrow to cover my ugliness!" " My mother directly replied to me: "There are not enough sunglasses. It is almost enough to buy a helmet. "

6. A girl broke up with her boyfriend, and the classmate next to her comforted her: "What's so good about that man? He is a civil engineer. As soon as you listen, you know that he is both "rustic" and "wooden"! Hearing this, the male student of software engineering next to him felt cold all over.

7. There are a group of great candidates in the college entrance examination. They know that their grades are poor and they can't afford to go to college, but they still insist on the college entrance examination. They just want to lower your grade and get you into a good school. This spirit of self-sacrifice is worth buying a bottle of AD calcium milk for someone who has been admitted to you!

8. I ordered takeout from KFC on a whim and told the customer service that I hoped to deliver it quickly, or I would starve to death. Results 15 minute delivery, and the tragedy happened after paying the money. The customer's message column on the document is printed directly: deliver the goods quickly, and the customer will starve to death.

9. In the second day of junior high school, the teacher asked to write a composition entitled "My deskmate". As a result, a male classmate in the class wrote: "My deskmate's hair is black and bright, just like a cow." Flies will flash when they fall! "

10, a teacher said: The sentence of naked marriage: I have no car, no money, no house and no diamond ring, but I have a heart to accompany you to your old age. Its degree of unreliability is similar to: although I didn't study, attend classes, review or do problems, I have an unyielding heart. The biggest misunderstanding about love is that love is omnipotent.