In the world of adults, an "sorry" is as heavy as a thousand words.

No one is perfect, and mistakes are inevitable. Although everyone knows this truth, when mistakes happen, most people are still unwilling to admit them and apologize for them.

My good friend A Yu had a big fight with his girlfriend recently, and I was shocked when I learned, because they are both very gentle characters. Things are simple, too. When Ayu came home from work, she forgot to buy bread. When her girlfriend complained, Ayu held back. When you come and go, contradictions become conflicts.

"I care about every little thing, as for it." He sounds sad.

"Did she tell you to bring bread when you go out?"

"yes."

"Then why didn't you bring it?"

"I forgot, I was too busy and had too many things to do, so I forgot." He scratched his head.

"Isn't that an apology? After all, it is really your fault. "

He opened his mouth and said nothing.

"Very simple, I'm sorry, I forgot to bring bread, and I will remember it later. Isn't everything solved? " I'm a little in distress situation.

"It's a shame to apologize. I don't like it." He curled his lips.

Indeed, the act of apologizing is an admission of one's own mistakes and also an injury to self-confidence. Subconsciously, no one wants to do it. Even for the people around me, I don't want to ruin my "perfect image".

"You accuse me" will be replaced by another concept in the eyes of most people-"You don't think I'm good enough". Then, we felt wronged and resentful and began to quarrel. Right and wrong are meaningless, let alone apologizing.

And those close to them still refuse to bow their heads. To strangers, apologizing is like going to Shu Dao.

I took the bus two days ago and witnessed a fight. A middle-aged man pushed a young man hard, and the young man fought back decisively and then tore it violently. The police arrived soon after the bus stopped.

When asked about the reason, the middle-aged man said angrily, "He stepped on my shoes and pretended nothing happened. I looked at him and he glared at me. " The onlookers immediately talked about it. "stepping on a shoe is worth hitting?" "How big is it?" "People are still so impulsive in middle age." ……

It's normal to say sorry when stepping on someone else's shoes, but there are still some choices that can be ignored.

Sometimes, when you make a mistake, people will not respect you because you don't apologize. If you don't apologize, it's like the mistake never happened, which is even more nonsense.

It seems that all successful studies are teaching us never to bow our heads. So in the face of mistakes, many people still think highly of them, and the mistakes will get deeper and deeper.

"I'm sorry" has become an awkward sentence. I feel sorry in my heart, but I don't want to express it.

I went to Lingyin Temple once when I was a teenager. On the mountain road, I saw monks bow to the tree.

"Master, what is this?"

"I forgot to water it yesterday, and today I apologize to it." Monks have solemn faces.

"But it's just a tree. I won't blame you." My little mind can't understand.

"Others blame you, and it doesn't matter if you apologize or not." Monks put their hands together.

"Can it understand your apology?"

"yes."

"I don't believe it." I skipped away, and the monk was not angry. He just smiled and watched me leave.

At that time, I thought the monk was carrying coals to Newcastle, and the tree couldn't talk, so there was no need to put on airs. Now that I think about it, there is no end to Buddhism.

Sometimes, yes, I know it very well. Whether people want to apologize to you is one thing, and whether to say it or not is another.

Everyone is born with the need to create a good image and wants to win. And admitting mistakes is self-destruction. Especially in the fierce competition environment, the wrong personal image will be destroyed, and it is difficult to maintain self-confidence. It is very difficult to admit mistakes out of instinctive self-protection consciousness.

There are two classmates who used to be very close, and recently it is rumored that they broke up.

Curious to ask why. It is said that A and B are business partners. The company lost a lot of money because of A's mistake.

A message "I'll pay you." I just left.

B confided to us, "He didn't even say he was sorry."

Some students asked, "What's the use of saying sorry for such a big mistake?" Will you forgive him? "

B shook his head. "Of course not, but I think he should say it."

Many people said they didn't understand.

Apologizing can't make up for the loss, so don't say it?

Remedy is a behavior problem, and apology is an attitude problem.

A correct apology requires three conditions (from rework):

1. Take responsibility.

2. Avoid assumptions.

3. Mention details to avoid mistakes from happening again.

Provide negative teaching materials.

In public, we often hear such a insincere apology:

"We apologize for any inconvenience caused."

1. Using "we" instead of "I" as the subject is obviously the rhetoric of the responsible person to evade responsibility.

2. "Possibility" is a hypothesis.

3. "Any inconvenience" is vague. There is no mention of measures to avoid recurrence.

So this kind of apology makes people listen to it without any sense of existence. Because it lacks the minimum sincerity.

If you really did something wrong, apologize sincerely and try your best to make up for it. It is better to save, and it cannot and is not a reason to ignore it.

For those who are close, don't think that if you are close, you won't be hurt.

For strangers, your proper apology will only show your high quality and will not damage your image.

In the adult world, it is really difficult to apologize, but you can't be absent.