Tell me: you are so sarcastic. Are you born with essential balm and cool oil?

1, men's anger is similar to shooting, and it's only a little bit. It's okay to sweep the floor after the bombing. A woman's anger is like the integral of a membership card. It's no big deal to add a few points at a time, but if the score is above 100, you will be cuckolded.

2. My friend's screen name is "Because the egg hurts", and then when he logs off, the system will prompt me: Your friend logs off because of the egg pain!

3. If you are looking for a girlfriend, you should find someone who doesn't like makeup. Occasionally, I feel heartache! Find an ordinary makeup artist, and if you don't draw once in a while, you will die suddenly!

4. If your husband cheats. I can only learn to cook. Grab a man's heart. We have to grab his stomach first. For example, you peel an orange for him and cook seafood for him later. Let him be chronically poisoned. Another example is to make him a cup of honey water, and then make shallots and tofu for lunch. Make him more and more deaf. People can't be killed. So I can only try to help him eat something wrong. Believe me, as long as you are willing to work hard, there is no revenge in this world ~

Don't envy others who are more mature than you, because they meet more bad people than you along the way.

6. You like to talk sarcastically. Are you born with essential balm and cool oil?

7. After taking the exam for so many years, why not have an anniversary celebration? For example, if you take 40, you will take two subjects and one subject, and you can choose not to take two subjects.

8. The real feeling of sitting in more than 10 million luxury cars: let's not talk about the displacement for the time being. I'm not a professional, so I can't comment. It's big anyway. Let's start with speed, 70 yards? That's the starting speed, 120? Very neutral, full speed and steady speed are over 400, not like Maibakh at all. Ferrari can compete with it. There is a lot of space, so you can sleep directly in it without any grievances. Lengthening Lincoln and Audi Q7 is just like golf in front. It's simply too big. The noise is so low that you can't hear the sound of the engine at all. You can only hear the wind outside and the wiping sound of the ground. People can talk calmly inside. A luxury car, the most important thing is stability. Sitting inside, I feel nothing, even a box of instant noodles won't spill. Ok, I'm going to the station.

9. Girls are not afraid of confession. If one doesn't accept you, she will confess with ten, and if ten don't accept you, she will confess with one hundred, and persist for a long time. One of them is blind.

10, if you are well, I would like to spare my old age.

1 1. When one person's spare tire is a spare tire, when one hundred people's spare tire is a spare tire, this is a qualitative change caused by quantitative change!

12, every time I walk alone at night, I am so scared. It's so dark and I'm so beautiful. I'm afraid others can't see me.

13. My son has a fever. Take her for an injection. He was so scared that he cried when he got to the clinic. The nurse quickly said, "I'm not giving you an injection, I'm giving your mother an injection." As he spoke, he quietly shot him in the ass. Unexpectedly, this time he stopped crying and said to the doctor seriously, "Aunt, you have the wrong number."

14, a pair of younger brothers and sisters are fighting, and the younger sister is fierce. When she flew, she kicked her brother's ass. As a result, her brother ducked, and her sister fell to the ground because she kicked empty. At this time, GC happened, and I saw my sister crying and rolling on the ground: "Just hide! Drop me to death! You just want to kill me! " Then my brother froze for a while and came back with a soft ass. . .

Humorous talk: life is: life, life.

Don't touch my girlfriend, don't mess with my friends, and don't blame me for hitting you.

My intuition tells me that you are not only mean, but also mean in your bones.

Who will shine in life? Who the fuck do you love?

Who broke my best friend's wing? I ruined his whole heaven.

I just like you. Bite me if you dare.

Sleeping is an art. You can sleep for a week without eating or drinking.

Eating food is also a profession. Don't stop me from struggling.

Although the old employer is a woman, the employer has a man's heart.

Don't tell me the background. We are all the same. We only have one life.

I found that two people have nothing in common together, which is a painful thing.

My world, it's not your turn to tell me what to do now.

Bai's upgrade standard is idiot, losing money and loving beauty.

Men look at women, don't say love or not, just look at a face.

When breaking up, don't be inappropriate with me. Are you fucking compatible with aliens?

As long as you are not kneeling, no one in the world is taller than you.

Don't think that you are tall, I will look up to you.

Put on a mask and talk to me. I have no energy to guess whether what you said is true or not.

It doesn't matter where I am in your heart, what matters is that I am still opposite you.

I can't be the heroine, but I can treat you like a thief.

I know what I want, and no one can take it away without my consent.

Don't say that others are mentally ill. If they are sick, they must have brains.

Don't slander my purity with your dirty eyes.

Don't insult others, boy. I'm afraid you won't have a good result in the end

You'd better not regret missing me, because I will find someone better than you.

I fell in love with you, an addictive poison. How can I leave you?

Talking to you is a waste of saliva, and you have to pay with me.

Cicadas in summer praise and mosquitoes in summer give red envelopes.

I'm going to take your luggage, so you are a happy pauper now.

Do you think you are short? Step on your right foot with your left foot to see if you have grown taller.

The world belongs to us and our sons, but it will eventually belong to our grandchildren.

The car is a bicycle, the house is a rental house, and I also have a house and a car.

What is a daughter-in-law for? It was fun.

Don't play with me, or I will make you cry rhythmically in the end.

There is a shadow in front, don't be afraid, that's because there is sunshine behind.

Life is: birth and life.

Are you happy now? Laugh when you are happy, and laugh later when you are unhappy.

When I get along with people and dogs in my life, I find that people are sometimes worse than dogs.

Don't say hello to me when you break up, Cao, so you'd better break up with me.

Although you look like a person, you are rotten inside.

Talk about teasing couples and showing love.

Say 1. The world I have seen has always been gray and has never been brilliant.

Sometimes memory is the root of pain, and forgetting it is my blessing.

When I was in the street yesterday, I saw a woman who looked like you. If he wasn't a little short, I really thought it was you. She was as beautiful as a fairy.

4. "What you need is someone who is interested in all your nonsense", right?

I'm not born with thorns. Don't touch me if you know I'm bad.

6. When the years are quiet, you become the only poem in my heart that is so unprepared.

7. I heard that you stubbornly didn't look back when you left, saying that your eyes were in the sand, just rub them.

8. I have three things that are not three minutes of enthusiasm, dreaming of friendship and liking you.

9. The old deskmate is not an old lover, but the youth I share with you is no less than the first love.

10. Drink my passion like water and it will burn your tongue one day. -Zhang

The space for couples to show their love is 1. Every time you say those strange sad and gloomy words, I silently feel that it is my fault that I failed to warm you.

Maybe you haven't experienced the feeling of being choked by water and being spicy by Chili, so you don't understand the helplessness.

Time will not go backwards to bother me, and I will not look back.

You care what others think of you, but a lion doesn't care what a sheep thinks.

No matter how many times you are embarrassed, you will eventually make up because you can't bear it. It feels good.

6. Who said that the instant noodle partner is ham sausage? I think it's the TV.

7. When is the right time! When no one is around, you are really drunk ... you forget the moment and lose the whole world!

8. You know I'm in pain and you ask me what's wrong.

9. Thank you for your kindness to me, but now I want to cherish you, but I have gone far.

10. If you don't care, how can you have so many emotions?

1 1. Waterfall-like long hair, elegant dress, standard oval face, smart almond eyes, that kind of sedate and dignified temperament, even naughty people will be cautious when they see you.

12. Every time I open the chat record, I will think of the little things in my heart.

13. You skipped in. A red coat with a tight belt looks so light and vigorous, just like a red cloud floating in the sky.

14. You are a butterfly among flowers and a bud among lilies. No matter what clothes you wear, you are always so dignified and beautiful.

15. There is always a person, no matter how many times he wants to give up, he still can't bear it.

16. You walked into the living room from the outside with a bunch of laughter and casually wore a red sweatshirt. It was so beautiful, so passionate and so simple.

17. Along the way with you, I thought there was no disagreement at the end of love.

18. I don't know how to express the strongest and deepest impression you left in my heart. Is it your plump and tall figure? Fair skin? Dark and deep eyes? Small and rosy lips?

19. Spring flowers and autumn moon are scenes praised by poets, but I feel very ordinary about them. Only your smile embedded with pear vortex is the most beautiful idol in my eyes.

20. On the road of life, most people, most of the time, can only rely on themselves.

Couples show love and talk about romantic space 2 1. You came to me slowly: a brown-green spring shirt with white lace on the neckline; Dark green pants, two pants like knives; Milky white high heels ... Ah, Jane is really an elegant and sad statue!

22. When the wind blew your hair dry, I was simply fascinated: in the shiny shawl soft hair, in the faint eyebrows, in the clear eyes like water … you are so beautiful!

23. Your beauty is transferred from bone to skin, and this moment should last forever.

24. Only lotus can be worthy of your holiness, and you can be worthy of your ice and moon.

25. An unspeakable love suddenly rises in my heart.

26. Maybe I am really stupid, knowing that you don't love me, and I don't want to look back.

27. But there is still an indescribable and elusive instrument that stirs my heart.

28. You are a bit like the moon and twinkling stars in the sky. Unfortunately, I'm not a poet. Otherwise, you will write 10,000 poems to describe your beauty.

29. Where were you when my heart ached?

30. From a distance, I looked at your back. Your black hair tied behind your head with a big red ribbon is like a waterfall pouring down from a mountain stream at the foot of a quiet mountain.

3 1. Your elegant manners, charming and beautiful appearance, charming and decent manners and elegant and generous speech left a deep impression on me from the beginning.

32. Between lovers, talking about feelings hurts money.

33. I'm dead. Would you please leave me some dignity?

34. You are wearing a purple cheongsam. Seen from a distance, it really flies like a small butterfly. It's beautiful and the color is soft.

35. comely figure, elegant and charming manner, especially raven hair, have an indescribable charm.

36. There is quite a feeling of "clear water gives birth to hibiscus". The moment I first touched you, I strongly felt that you exuded a wonderful gentle atmosphere.

I'm sorry, I thought too much. You take it for granted that you are good to me.

38. I found you in the crowd at a glance. I dare not say that you are the most beautiful among them, but I dare say that you are the best among them.

39. When I first fell in love, I didn't understand love. When I did, there would be no first love.

40. Footprints are left, but what I can't let go of is that sad heart. When I turn around and walk forward, what you will never see is my blurred eyes.

4 1. Although I walk slowly, I never walk backwards!

In a word, simple and inspirational: life is: born to live.

1, put away the envy of others and work hard by yourself.

2, life is: born to live.

If God doesn't help you, he must believe that you can.

As long as you have confidence, people will never be defeated.

Life is a gamble, and those who are afraid of losing will never win.

6, don't cry casually, because even if you cry, you can't keep anything.

7. I will continue to write tomorrow's spectrum with strength and walk the road of the future with perseverance.

8. If you want to walk fast, walk alone; If you want to go far away, I will go with you.

9. Fantasy will come up with many wonderful ideas, but nothing can be done.

10, unless a person has confidence in himself, he will bring confidence to others.

1 1. Self-defeating is the saddest failure, and self-defeating is the most precious victory.

12, let's turn our worries into thinking and planning beforehand!

13, nothing is more powerful than habit.

14, people live to expect. When you are tired and heartbroken, think about your expectations, and you will have the idea of moving on, so it is not good to abandon any perfect expectations.