How do you comfort people who complain to you?

Whether eating, drinking or chatting together, you should stay with him and vent your emotions with him.

2.***, identify with his emotions

Agree with the other party's dissatisfaction and complaints about the status quo, and even agree with some of his remarks that "the world is not good." Don't be serious with him, go against him.

(2) agree with his emotions, agree that the occurrence of this incident is indeed what we don't want to see, and don't deny his emotions.

Emotions are quite powerful and real. Don't deny others' emotions, help them accept their own. Just like a child crying because his toy is broken, do you think he is naive? Everyone's emotions are real, and everyone has something they care about. Don't deny other people's emotions.

When a friend complains, try to understand/feel the pain and emotions of others. If you say: I understand your feelings/pain/sadness, I think you must be very sad. More useful than saying "nothing" a hundred times.

3. Real response

Some people will say, when friends complain to you, don't talk about yourself. Some people start talking about themselves when they hear their friends complain because they don't do well. I completely turned the topic to myself.

You can do it in after making love. Tell me more about yourself. For example, when you hear a friend's story, you have some feelings in your body, or what pictures appear in your mind, or what stories come to mind, you can share them.

For example, you feel that your stomach is a little blocked;

For example, you remember one thing you experienced when you were a child, and how you finally got out;

For example, a sentence suddenly appears in your mind: "We are not so eager for fairness in our hearts, but are eager for the flow of love, eager for love to flow through my life, and then flow to other lives with the temperature of my life." At a high level, everything is connected. 」

Because what you said is the real you at this moment. You are unreasonable and don't shout slogans. You are responding to life with life, and your story will let him see himself.

Companionship+* * * emotion+real response will help you become a better listener.