Should parents accompany their children to do homework?

My personal opinion is that parents should not accompany their children to do homework.

From the first day of elementary school, many parents will be asked by teachers to accompany their children to do homework every day, check their children's homework and sign their names. Everyone knows that developing good study and living habits for children from the first grade is the most important thing at this stage. Therefore, many parents give up a lot of their precious time to accompany their children to do homework every day.

Writing accompaniment will inhibit children’s brain potential

What is the purpose of parents to accompany homework? It’s nothing more than supervising the children, lest they make mistakes! When the child was doing homework, the mother sitting next to him said that the writing was crooked, that the question was wrong, and that the sitting posture was wrong. What was the result? When children are doing homework, there is always a "supervisor" around them, and their mental state is always in a state of tension, uneasiness, and even fear. This state will inhibit the use and development of the child's brain potential.

In order to let parents understand how to deal with their children's learning, Teacher Rong once tutored a fourth-grade boy who gave up studying mathematics.

At first, Teacher Rong gave the boy a very simple question. The boy looked at her while doing it, and she had no expression on her face. The boy tried to finish it and got it right. Then he looked at Teacher Rong again. At this time, Teacher Rong had a dissatisfied expression on his face. As a result, the child quickly found an eraser to erase the answer he had just made, and looked at Teacher Rong while wiping it. face. After repeating it three times, he said frustratedly: "I can't do it!" Later, Teacher Rong told him: "You did it right the first time, but if you think my face is wrong, just change it. In fact, you are very good at it." Do the questions, but you are too afraid of your mother’s criticism!

Now, the teacher will give you 4 more questions. I believe you can do it well, but it doesn’t matter even if you don’t do it well. Everyone makes mistakes when studying. Let’s just try to make fewer mistakes! Now, you can do it by yourself, I’ll go do something, and I’ll come back later to see how well you did!” After 30 minutes, Teacher Rong walked to the child’s side, and his question was already there. Done. He hesitated and said: "Teacher Rong, see if I did it right?" Teacher Rong said with a smile: "It's your business to check whether it's correct or not. Can you check it for me after you finish it?"

The child checked for another 10 minutes, and then said firmly: "I've finished checking, it should be right!" Teacher Rong took it and took a look, and it turned out that it was all right. Teacher Rong called the child's mother in and told her the good news. At this time, the boy's face lit up and he looked at his mother proudly. After the mother understood the whole process, she said guiltily: "It was me who hurt him by accompanying him with his homework every day!" Later, the child's academic performance continued to improve and he became a good student who studied consciously.

? Accompanying you when doing homework makes your child “aging prematurely”

“My son, who is in the first grade, is very slow in doing the questions and makes mistakes. I am accompanying him and he does it quickly and correctly. But he is not independent, he is dependent, and he always looks at my face. He can do the 40-minute questions for two hours..." "Sometimes I am anxious and say that I can't do it before 9 o'clock. If it’s done, don’t do it. If the child is afraid of not having to hand in the homework, it will be a little faster.”

Many parents have the same feeling when it comes to accompanying their children to do homework. Faced with the confusion of many parents, Rong Heling, the director of Zhengzhou Zhiling Children's Kindergarten who has many years of research on early childhood education, made a surprising statement: "Which one is more likely to become successful, a thriving sapling or a wilting sapling? Everyone knows the answer. , the same is true for our children. A happy, confident, and interested in everything will be more likely to become successful! However, actual surveys have found that a considerable number of children age before they are old - have no interest in anything, are listless, and have poor expressions. Being numb and feeling like there is no meaning in life is a very scary phenomenon, and one of the important reasons for this phenomenon is doing homework together.”

The teacher believes that doing homework with others has four major dangers:

1. Kill the child’s self-confidence and interest;

2. Harm the child’s independence;

3. Obliterate the child’s sense of responsibility;

4. Deprive children of their happiness.

Originally, learning was the child’s own business, but as a result, the child learns for his parents. The child has no sense of responsibility for the learning task and just wants to avoid punishment.

The high frequency of accusations, punishments, and scolding during homework assignments directly harms children's happiness. Because the child will think that "my parents cannot accept me or like me, I am a failure, I am incompetent." Such children will not like themselves or accept themselves throughout their lives, and will be in conflict and pain throughout their lives.

Yin Jianli, an education expert engaged in family education research and consulting in my country, also believes that accompanying homework does not cultivate children’s good habits, but breaks down good habits and wears down children’s self-control. The habits created by "accompanying" are only physical. "Not accompanying" only leaves space for children to let habits grow in their hearts.

?Mobilize internal energy to learn

First of all, let the child understand that homework is his own business.

Secondly, for questions with a lot of text, let the child guess by himself before doing it. For many questions, although the child cannot read the words, he knows how to do them. He will develop the child's visual understanding through seeing and feeling. ability; when the guess is wrong, read it to him, but do not advocate explaining it to him. Hearing a passage and actively understanding it is also a kind of auditory comprehension learning. Improving visual and auditory abilities is an effective way to improve lecture efficiency and learning efficiency.

Third, parents should do their own thing and let their children do their homework in a room alone. If the child is inattentive and prone to procrastination, remove all possible interference factors in the room.

Fourth, after the child has finished his homework, let him check it by himself.

Fifth, the parents check, explain the questions that the children really cannot solve, check the children's knowledge deficiencies, and finally sign.

In addition, in the process of children's growth, they should always encourage them positively, do not criticize, and downplay bad behaviors. If the children make a little progress, they should be recognized in time. Accompanying children to do homework is a method of using external force to act on children, which has little effect and may even be counterproductive. Once a child's internal strength is mobilized, it will have a lifelong impact. Why don't parents use role models and take measures such as telling their children about the growth experiences of successful people to encourage their children to make progress, not be afraid of setbacks and be willing to learn?