221 The funniest good copywriting

1. I often see people talking about foodies! Tell me about my son! When my son was eating, I said one sentence repeatedly: Son, raise your head and take a breath!

2. What qualifications do today's men have to say that they will grow old together with their girls? Even before my hair turns gray, I am completely bald.

3. Mom and I were lying on the sofa eating snacks. Dad came over and scolded me. I said weakly: Mom is eating too, why didn’t you tell her? Dad: No matter how fat your mom is, I still want her. What about you?

4. The relationship between people always starts with "Can I get to know you?" and ends with "I fucking know you!"

5. "I am a good-tempered person. If one day someone steps on my bottom line." "What will happen?" Then I will lower the bottom line again. ”

6. From the first few thousand to the later tens of thousands and then hundreds of thousands and millions, I worked hard step by step. Beijing is really a good place. If you don’t work hard, you will I had no idea that I could owe so much.

7. What we can’t get up to is our grades, what we can’t get down is our weight, what we can’t pick up and put down are chopsticks, and what we can’t get in and out of. It’s the quilt!

8. “Do you like my angelic face or my devilish figure? "I just like your sense of humor." ”

9. During the Chinese New Year, every family pastes blessings upside down, which means that blessings have arrived. Today, I had a whim and wrote a piece of money and pasted it upside down on the door, which means that the money has arrived. My daughter-in-law saw it. , slapped him over, and said, I will let you give money back, let you give money back, give money back...

10. Appearance is given by the previous generation, education is set by the previous generation, and concepts are set by the previous generation. It was taught by the previous generation, and the environment was left by the previous generation. I actually had the nerve to say: one generation is not as good as the other. 11. The teacher said that a wrong question is a kind of wealth. I looked at my paper. Only then did I realize that I am a wealthy person.

Twelve. A girl was called to the office for wearing a midriff-baring dress. A group of teachers criticized her and tried to persuade her. The girl’s face remained calm and her heart did not beat. The director only said one sentence and the girl immediately cried. He said, "You are the only one wearing a navel-baring dress!" Look how dirty your belly button is, it’s full of dust! "

Thirteen. I dismantled the TV, and my dad said to me: If you are well, it will be sunny. If you are not well, I will hammer you to death.

14. I just saw a figure that looked like you, and I ran after him like crazy. Then I remembered that you were not in this city, and I stopped. I almost hit the wrong person.

< p>15. I went to a restaurant with my friends. I took the menu and looked at the drinks list and found that there were several kinds of beer, so I asked the waiting waiter: "Sister, can you tell me which beer tastes best?" point. The waiter replied fiercely: "It's all the same. If you drink too much, you'll vomit it!" ”

15. Those who are good-looking and like to eat are called foodies. Those who are ugly and like to eat are called foodies!

17. I remember that I used to be picked on from behind in school. I didn’t dare to resist or tell my teacher or parents because I was the only boy in the class wearing this.

18. My mother: My colleague Lao Zhang’s. The child is fine. You can go and see her tomorrow. Me: Okay. My mother hesitated: No, you better not go. Me: Why? My mother: I have a good relationship with you, so you can’t harm others...

Nineteen. No matter how beautiful you are, one day you will grow old. I think I may not be able to bear this loss, so I have never looked good.

Twenty. I spent the first half of my life wandering. , I spent the rest of my life making soup, staying up late, applying eye cream, adding wolfberry to my beer, adding ginseng to my cola, drinking the strongest wine, and taking the most expensive ambulance. 21. When I was a child, I made a mistake and was beaten by my mother. I didn’t shed a single tear! After that, my mother stroked my head: Silly boy! Why don’t you run? Does it hurt? I cried after hearing this! You chased me for two streets, tell me where else can I run? !

Twenty-two. An obstetrician and gynecologist started his own practice. After returning home on the first day, his wife asked him: "How was your result today?" The doctor replied: "It's not too bad. Although the mother and the baby were not saved, the baby's father was finally saved." ”

Twenty-three. The person I love is a rich woman. One day she will drive a Rolls-Royce Phantom to pick me up. I guessed the beginning, but I didn’t guess that day would be her 80th. Happy birthday.

Twenty-four. Two days ago at the class reunion, a buddy was very upset and said that he had fallen in love with a girl, and finally waited until Valentine's Day to confess to her, but the girl didn't listen at all, thinking about April Fool's Day. I will confess my love again. If the girl doesn’t believe it, then she can only wait for the Qingming Festival.