Make you laugh. Tell me something interesting.

1, we agreed not to make me cry, but you smoked me with fucking onions.

I only drink pure water when drinking water and pure milk when drinking milk, so I am very simple.

I can't miss myself, I can't take care of myself, I can't take care of myself, I can't take my own results, I can't give myself happiness.

4. The so-called surprise is that the rabbit you are waiting for is coming, followed by the wolf!

5. People who run around brothels are not old. Please use Huiren Shenbao.

Titanic told me that I would rather eat instant noodles at home than spend that spare money on a romantic cruise.

7. I feel like two pigs, because one pig can't describe your stupidity.

8. Sleep is an art, and no one can stop me from pursuing it.

9. Water can carry a boat and cook porridge.

10, we have some differences: she wants me to turn dung into gold, and I hope she treats gold as dung.

1 1. Besides teeth, there is love.

12, which is gold, will always be spent; This is a mirror. It always reflects light.

13, if anyone bothers me, I will change my avatar to his photo, often online and offline! Curse him

14, I just eat and lose weight every day, and you still say I have no perseverance?

15, if class is a hypnotic, surfing the Internet is a refreshing agent.

16, each of us is a dreamer. When dreams disappear, we will miss home.

17, if a person is not serious, even a headache is partial.

18, keep the egg fixed in the case of considerable egg pain!

19, the function of the school is to do whatever you want and not let you do anything.

20. There are a lot of herbs in the world, so why look for them online? Small quantity and poor quality.

2 1. Men are like Bluetooth. He was in touch when you were there. But as soon as you walk away, he goes to find other peripherals! !

Women are like wi-fi. They can see all the devices they can connect, but they will choose the best one!

22. Women's fears: First, they are afraid of being a sophomore and having a big waist; third, they are afraid of not having pocket money; fourth, they are afraid that their clothes are out of date; fifth, they are afraid that their children will not go home in bars; and finally, they are afraid that their husbands will be too extravagant.

23. Love without trust is like a cell phone without a signal, so you can only play games.

24. Love is like socks. The more unpleasant socks look, the more likely they are to stay with you forever. The more beautiful socks they like, the less socks they often have.

25. When you lose love, you gain experience; When you get love, you will lose yourself.

26. Women want to be men's treasures, and men want to be women's mascots.

27, what is a secret love, that is, like but dare not approach; What is love, that is, there are beautiful women next to you but turn a blind eye; What is lovelorn? It was a face full of tears and a runny nose.

28. If you can't be a bad guy, be a good guy who tickles the bad guy.

29. Your advantage is that it is useless at critical times.

30. Promise Chairman Mao: I will never pinch the flowers of my motherland again. I can pinch flowers and bones.

Funny quotations that make you laugh.

Riddle: Wedding night. Guess the five names of Water Margin ... Answer: Lin Chong, Shi Jin, Song Jiang, Ruan Xiaoer and Wu Yong.

Your underwear is almost the same as bin Laden's, and the American army has been eyeing you. For safety, please take off your clothes immediately and run naked to the mall to buy clothes!

First-class beauty across the ocean, second-class beauty in Shenzhen and Zhuhai, third-class beauty in Shanghai, fourth-class beauty waiting in the country, and fifth-class beauty sent to reform-through-labor camp!

A baby smiled at birth. Everyone wants to know why the other children are crying, but he is laughing. So the baby opened his hand with a pill in his hand and said, you want to fuck me! No way!

A doctor has been very careless and once wrote "anal speech" in his medical record. The chief physician was very angry when he found out and criticized "nonsense" in the bottom.

The first part: the person I love was taken away; Bottom line: people who love me are terrible; Horizontal criticism: Life is hard.

Love is music, first love is light music, passionate love is rock music, marriage is pop music and divorce is pop music.

Dressed in a hairless Caesar, holding a wireless phone, sitting alone in Santana, people call me the boss of the Beggars' Sect.

One cup and two cups stride, three cups and four cups hold the wall, five cups and six cups hold the wall. If I don't leave, my sister will hug me after drinking a catty!

Campus version of Li Qingzhao's words: I drank too much last night, strayed into the depths of the playground, vomited, vomited, woke up countless men and women, and quickly searched for clothes and pants.

A 20-year-old man is a futures, a 30-year-old man is a hot commodity, a 40-year-old man is a spot, and a 50-year-old man is a jumper. Treasure your youth!

A thunder woke Bush up in the middle of the night and shouted, "Quick, turn on the light!" " The bodyguard lit the candle tacitly. Looking at the heavy rain outside the window, Bush hissed, "I'm all over Afghanistan."

Hello, I am honored to inform you that your mobile phone number won the first prize in the prize-winning network access activity in our city. The bonus is 5 million yuan. Please take a pistol to any bank to collect it. The password is "Don't move".

Handsome boy, I'm eighteen or nineteen this year and I haven't found a girlfriend yet. People go to the streets hand in hand, and I hold hands with my left hand!

There are many fish in the sea. If you want to find it, don't find it at work. The quantity is small and the quality is not good!

Look at the pig opposite, look at it, look at it! Don't stare at your mobile phone in a daze. You look so strange! ? Hahaha! !

You are cool. You drink water in the reservoir, sleep in the ancient tomb, have a waterfall in your mouth, and your limbs are like sleepers. You think you are The Story Of Diu Sim Lu Bu, but you are actually a native of Antarctica.

Children's humor makes you laugh.

1, in elementary school, lying for the first time. Once the school asked for money, my mother gave it to 100, but it was confiscated in the class that day. After school, I saw that there were snacks on the roadside, so I couldn't help but buy three yuan to eat. After returning home, my mother asked: Have you paid the money? Confiscated today. Mom: Oh, what about the money? Take out the money: here it is! Mom: Why are there 97 left? Bow down: Oh, I accidentally lost three dollars when I came back. Mother smiled, and then touched her face with her palm. 2. Teacher: Do you know, Xiao Yong, if Uncle Lei Feng is still alive and now he is over 70 years old, how can you call him Brother Lei Feng in your composition book? Xiao Yong: This shows that Lei Feng is always young. Teacher: No, the teacher hasn't mentioned Brother Lei Feng yet. How could you? Xiao Yong: OK, I will write about Grandpa Lei Feng in the future.

On the main road of a big city, a snail crawled slowly on the expressway. A man drove past him in a car driver and said contemptuously to the snail, I want to laugh when I see your speed! Three hours later, the snail proudly climbed over the car of the man just now and said contemptuously, I want to laugh when I see you stuck here! I passed the traffic lights first! After that, the snail whistled and crawled forward slowly.

Funny classic quotations that make you laugh.

You are cool. You drink water in the reservoir, sleep in the ancient tomb, have a waterfall in your mouth, and your limbs are like sleepers. You think you are The Story Of Diu Sim Lu Bu, but you are actually a native of Antarctica.

Riddle: Wedding night. Guess the five names of Water Margin ... Answer: Lin Chong, Shi Jin, Song Jiang, Ruan Xiaoer and Wu Yong.

Your underwear is almost the same as bin Laden's, and the American army has been eyeing you. For safety, please take off your clothes immediately and run naked to the mall to buy clothes!

First-class beauty across the ocean, second-class beauty in Shenzhen and Zhuhai, third-class beauty in Shanghai, fourth-class beauty waiting in the country, and fifth-class beauty sent to reform-through-labor camp!

A baby smiled at birth. Everyone wants to know why the other children are crying, but he is laughing. So the baby opened his hand with a pill in his hand and said, you want to fuck me! No way!

A doctor has been very careless and once wrote "anal speech" in his medical record. The chief physician was very angry when he found out and criticized "nonsense" in the bottom.

The first part: the person I love was taken away; Bottom line: people who love me are terrible; Horizontal criticism: Life is hard.

Love is music, first love is light music, passionate love is rock music, marriage is pop music and divorce is pop music.

Dressed in a hairless Caesar, holding a wireless phone, sitting alone in Santana, people call me the boss of the Beggars' Sect.

One cup and two cups stride, three cups and four cups hold the wall, five cups and six cups hold the wall. If I don't leave, my sister will hug me after drinking a catty!

Campus version of Li Qingzhao's words: I drank too much last night, strayed into the depths of the playground, vomited, vomited, woke up countless men and women, and quickly searched for clothes and pants.

A 20-year-old man is a futures, a 30-year-old man is a hot commodity, a 40-year-old man is a spot, and a 50-year-old man is a jumper. Treasure your youth!

A thunder woke Bush up in the middle of the night and shouted, "Quick, turn on the light!" " The bodyguard lit the candle tacitly. Looking at the heavy rain outside the window, Bush hissed, "I'm all over Afghanistan."

Hello, I am honored to inform you that your mobile phone number won the first prize in the prize-winning network access activity in our city. The bonus is 5 million yuan. Please take a pistol to any bank to collect it. The password is "Don't move".

Handsome boy, I'm eighteen or nineteen this year and I haven't found a girlfriend yet. People go to the streets hand in hand, and I hold hands with my left hand!

There are many fish in the sea. If you want to find it, don't find it at work. The quantity is small and the quality is not good!

Look at the pig opposite, look at it, look at it! Don't stare at your mobile phone in a daze. You look so strange! ? Hahaha! !