I found that I am a coward, how can I make my courage bigger?

Timid retreat is indeed a big obstacle in one's life and a stumbling block on the road to growth and success. So, how can we kick this stumbling block and go forward bravely on the road of growth, maturity and success?

After realizing that timidity, shyness and retreat will have a bad influence on our study and future work and life, we should learn to help ourselves-help ourselves get rid of the troubles of timidity and retreat and become a confident, independent, brave in meeting challenges and difficulties, good at seizing opportunities and happy and relaxed person!

First, establishing self-confidence is an important magic weapon to overcome timidity and retreat.

A timid person is often a person who lacks confidence. They doubt whether they have the ability to finish something, and as a result, they may make things worse because of psychological tension and formality. Some of us may have experienced stage fright in the exam. I usually get good grades, but when I meet a major exam, I feel extremely nervous and my mind is blank. As a result, the questions I did before were also wrong. This is a sign of lack of self-confidence, which is often the case with timid people. People who are confident, bold and extroverted may do better in the big exam, because the latter have stronger self-confidence and don't think too much like timid and introverted people. Their brains are focused on how to answer questions, which makes it easier for them to play their level or even surpass it. Then, a timid person should cheer himself up before doing something, believe that he is at least capable of exerting his own level, and then work hard on his own, as the saying goes; Man proposes, God disposes; , hold this so-called; Facing some challenges with a normal heart, we will not leave any regrets for the result.

Second, make full preparations to lay a good foundation for building self-confidence.

Self-confidence is not innate. If you want to take the exam, but you haven't reviewed at all, no matter how bold and confident you are, you can't think that you will do well in the exam, let alone be a timid and unconfident person. Psychology is even more nervous. For another example, when you want to give a lecture in a place where there are many people, but you haven't prepared carefully, you will definitely doubt whether you can speak well before you go up. Of course, for people who are experienced in speaking, good at controlling scenes, adjusting atmosphere and improvising, it is another matter. But for people who are timid, every failure may be a major blow, so we should make full preparations before doing everything, which will lay the foundation for us to establish self-confidence and provide the possibility for our success. And every success becomes the driving force for timid people to try the next task, thus forming a virtuous circle, and finally making themselves more and more confident, more and more daring to try new things, meet more challenges, win more development opportunities and win more successful experiences for themselves.

Third, correctly attribute failure.

The so-called attribution, in layman's terms, is to attribute the cause of a thing to something, whether objective or subjective. Failure is often a heavy blow to the timid. Whenever encountering failure, timid people tend to be dejected and worried. This is because they always attribute their failures to subjective internal reasons, that is, they think they are not competent enough or they think they are not smart enough. This attribution will definitely make them doubt their abilities, which is undoubtedly a blow to their self-confidence. Then these timid people will choose to escape and give up when they encounter similar tasks or more challenging tasks in the future, because they have failed before because they think they are incompetent and incompetent. This will form a vicious circle, making timid people more timid, less confident and less courageous to try new tasks. Therefore, a person's attribution is very important, which directly affects a person's understanding of himself and his attitude towards other things, thus affecting his ability to handle some things.

On the contrary, if you can attribute the failure positively, that is, objectively, the situation may be very different. For example, when you don't do well in the exam, you don't have to be discouraged. It is important to calmly analyze what you did wrong and why. If you haven't reviewed it yourself, just make it clear next time; If you really work hard or fail to make it, then you must not post it for yourself; I am stupid; This label, this label is too heavy, which will suppress your courage and creativity invisibly. You can ask those students who have done the right thing, not only to learn how to solve this problem, but also to ask them to introduce their own learning methods for your reference. Even if those classmates are smarter than you, you don't need to feel inferior, because research shows that most people's intelligence is similar, which belongs to the middle level, so we can make up for it through our efforts the day after tomorrow, don't forget; Stupid birds fly first!

Let's talk about how timid people should better face and handle things in their daily lives.

Fourth, expand your communication range and actively communicate with others.

Timid and shy people are often afraid to associate with others because of timidity. As a result, they are confined to a small circle of friends and become more and more withdrawn and withdrawn. Timid people seldom associate with others, not because they are arrogant. On the contrary, they often think they are unlovable and unpopular, and others don't want to associate with them. If they form such a negative self-concept, that is, a stable understanding of themselves, then they will act intentionally or unintentionally, making it difficult for people to approach and communicate with each other.

In fact, when you feel cute and accepted by others, you will show confidence, and confident people are often cute and people are willing to associate with them. The more people you associate with, the more confident they will be, so they will not be so timid in front of others.

Fifth, pay attention to body language.

The so-called body language does not refer to the language we speak, but to the information conveyed by our body posture, movements and expressions. Shy people are embarrassed to talk to others, and dare not look directly into each other's eyes when facing others, so they give the impression of indifference and avoidance, but in essence, the message conveyed by this body language is that I am timid, I am afraid and I am uneasy. However, people who associate with it have not noticed this. They will misunderstand this kind of body language as indifference and conceit, thus avoiding it for thousands of miles and making timid people more hesitant. Actually, timid people don't.

Greeting or talking to people is not because they are rude or cold, but because they are afraid of saying inappropriate things.

Arthur Worms, an American psychologist, believes that as long as we make some adjustments to body language, we can have a surprising direct effect. He smiled,; Honesty, leaning forward, friendly handshake, eye contact and nodding give people the external impression of being kind and easy-going. He declared that it would be friendly in return, and strangers would not be so terrible.

Of course, it takes a long time to be bold and confident. Especially for a timid child, it takes courage and perseverance to become a confident and optimistic person who dares to try new fields and meet challenges!