Hot and funny classic quotations - The teacher is a pig demon, we are angry birds

Only the feeling of love belongs to me, the person I love does not belong to me

If I live a happy life and go to school, I don’t ask for happiness anymore, as long as I live!

You are a madman and I am a fool. We are crazy together.

There is a cold in the class, and I am at the forefront of fashion.

Today’s men are becoming more and more feminine.

As a child, I would blush whenever someone stared at me. Now, whenever someone stares at me, I make them blush.

Oh my god, teachers are all educated hooligans.

Ah hum, what if the world was without me. Let’s see how you can still live

Drinking and suffering from stomach bleeding and stomach pain until your eyes turn white

I said that I saw that the world of mortals is a flower on the cliff, but now I realize that you are just a human being A grain of slag in the sea

You said that the youth I spent with you has no moisture, but you don’t have to push me into the crater

I like it when I’m unhappy When I eat, I gain weight. When I gain weight, I feel unhappy.

In my next life I will be an onion, and I will make anyone who bullies me burst into tears.

Hey, stop thinking about it. The man who loves you most in this world has married your mother.

Boss, give me a chic haircut, I want to walk around in style.

When I have a girlfriend, I will run over and give her a mouthful, and then say: Where have you been all these years!

He said that we should be together. She said that we should be together early in the next life. He said that you said the same thing in the previous life, and you lied to me again.

The funny column is the best embrace for friends who need comfort. Please leave sad things next door.

Only after I got a fever did I realize that the earth rotates

People are unlucky, drinking cold water will clog their teeth; water is even more unlucky, even if it is drunk, it will be trapped in the teeth .

I want to spread my wings and fly to a foreign country for fun!

There are only two ways to realize your dream. One is to rely on dreams, and the other is to rely on imagination.

I really like others to use space comments to chat with me. Do you also have it?

You are very 2, you are 2, I am speechless, you 2 are incomparable

Repeat, repeat, repeat. Repeating the same thing! Are you annoyed?

Life is like a journey. No matter where I go, I can’t live without Liqun.

When you first get to know me, you will feel that I speak very softly and gently. After getting along with you for a long time, You will feel that I am being reserved from the beginning.

The night gave me a black mouse, but I used it to play games until dawn.

I accept your confession, but I don’t know whether I love you or not!

Not everyone has beauty, and no one has ugliness.

Then, if anyone bothers you, slap the wall and fill it with murals.

The teacher is a pig demon, we are angry birds

Don’t mess with me, I will even scare myself when I go crazy!

I have said it so many times, please don’t say sorry!

The waves behind the Yangtze River push the waves in front, and the waves in front die on the beach.

I bought a bottle of mineral water, took a sip and cursed: Fake! "Why is it fake?" It's watered down.

Everyone is a prisoner, and the phone number is the number.

Although I cannot save sentient beings, I can harm them.

The high-voltage electricity in your eyes is enough to last my mobile phone for a year.

It doesn’t matter if there is no traffic. You can access it secretly without telling the mobile company.

There is a famous saying that flowers often belong not to the people admiring them, but to cow dung.

Life is indeed a live broadcast, not only the ratings are low, but the salary is not high!

Use lies to verify lies and you will still get lies.

﹏, Can you please stop running around in my mind, aren’t you tired?

I have been waiting in front of the Buddha for thousands of years, but I just can’t wait for you to look back. Take a look at me.

Life is so delicate that it attracts countless heroes to bow down. 2020 classic saying: Life is like an angry bird, there are always a few pigs laughing when you fail

1. Life is like an angry bird, there are always a few pigs laughing when you fail. Life, after all, is still a state of mind. Different realms, different moods. Those who value it are bitter, those who despise it are free and easy; those who are persistent are confused, those who understand are empty; those who have many desires are tired, and those who have no desires are at ease. Have a cup of tea and look at the changes in the wind and clouds indifferently. If your heart becomes calmer, you will be happier.

2. If you live in the eyes of others, you will be lost in your own heart. Let go of yesterday, cherish today, and look toward the future. Since time will never go back, life should also be without regrets. Doing the present well is the best choice in life.

3. The lack of trust is like a mobile phone without signal, which can only play games. Love and hate are clear, but not excessive; have desire, but know satisfaction; know how to enjoy, but not extravagant; a little selfish, but not greedy. There is no need to be too harsh on yourself when you are in mortal flesh. The pursuit of perfection is a kind of imperfection because it goes against the grain. Be a complete person and experience life completely.

4. In life, you must learn to be tolerant. Your world will be bigger. When you get along, you must also learn to understand others. You will have fewer enemies. Sometimes in life, you must be relatively rational. Your regrets It's also less. If you deal with things more wisely, your success will be more certain. Of course, the mentality and thoughts such as wisdom, tolerance, understanding, rationality, and tolerance used in our lives are indispensable in life, and they can improve our lives.

5. Chewing pain is punishment for the past, and choosing to forget is an escape from reality. Cultivation means perfecting yourself and being tolerant of others. The pain in life lies partly in one's own shortcomings and partly in not being able to tolerate others. Cultivation is to increase happiness by perfecting oneself, and to dilute pain by tolerating others.

6. If life is a grain of sand, desire is a bottomless pit; if life is a drop of water, desire is a long river. Using a short life to race against infinite desires, who can win? Desire in life, once it is hard, you cannot get it, and if it is hard again, you cannot let it go. Those who are greedy will get stuck in it, while those who are content will take advantage of it. Those who are destined to come, cherish it; those who are not destined to go, just let it go. Being tolerant is great, being without desire is strong.

7. Life has given us too much load, and we move forward tenaciously in a rickety posture. Personality is like gold, the higher the purity, the higher the taste. A lifelong life, character is the foundation. Morality can make up for deficiencies in wisdom, but wisdom can never make up for deficiencies in morality.

8. If you have a free heart, you will be more free and easy; if you have a normal heart, you will be more calm; if you have a compassionate heart, you will accumulate more kindness; if you have a grateful heart, you will be happier; if you have a grateful heart, you will be happier. With a heart of cause and effect, you will be more sensible; with a heart of tolerance, you will be happier; with a heart of detachment, you will be more indifferent; with a heart of practice, you will be wiser; with a heart of simplicity, you will be purer; with a heart of simplicity, you will be more pure. With a self-aware mind, you will be more awake.

9. When doing things, you have to keep your head down. How much thought you can put down and how much patience you can endure will determine what you can do; when you are a person, you have to keep your head high. How many gazes you can withstand and how much pressure you can withstand will determine who you can be. . Lowering one's head implies humility and low-keyness, which is a sign of grandeur; raising one's head indicates forging ahead and being unyielding, which is one's backbone. If you lower your head when things go well, you will go further; if you look up when things go wrong, confidence is the most valuable thing. If you lower your head, you can't hit the threshold; if you raise your head, you can see the sky.

10. Mature people don’t ask about the past; smart people don’t ask about the present; open-minded people don’t ask about the future. When you are above others, you must treat yourself as a human being; when you are below others, you must treat yourself as a human being. He who knows how to look behind people's backs is a gentleman; he who knows how to look behind people's backs is a villain. When you make a mistake, the one who waits for others to come and then scolds you is your enemy, and the one who waits for others to leave and scolds you is your friend. As long as a person can control himself, he will be a strong person in life. Pigs have always been pigs, funny phrases

Pigs have always been pigs, funny phrases

1. I say I am a filter, and everything that comes into my mouth is bleached! Understand

2. The night gave me a pair of black eyes, but I used them to roll my eyes

3. Not every cow has Deluxe, and not every dad is Li Gang.

4. You scold, you continue to scold, tell me when you have finished scolding, I will go to bed first

5. My mother told me: If your husband bullies you, let him Your grandfather took him away.

6. Brushing your teeth is a mixed blessing. Hold the cup in one hand and the washing utensil in the other

7. The difference between humans and pigs is that pigs are always pigs, while humans are sometimes not humans

8. Don’t brag, please. Give the awesome back to the cows because cows also need sex

9. People nowadays are following the trend. They all like to use deodorant socks to cover their mouths when talking.

10. It’s noon on the hoeing day, so school is really hard. After entering the school, I was forced to stand all afternoon.

11. Dear friends, I really envy you for meeting me at such a young age

12. People say that long hair makes you short-sighted, so I decided to cut my hair. short.

13. If you are in a bad mood, take the bus and sit behind someone with long hair to get a haircut

14. People cannot take money into the grave, but money can take people into the grave.

15. I am not a violent person. I don’t recognize people if I become violent.

16. If one day I go down. Remember, I will come to you

17. If gender equality is not implemented, why can’t I go to the women’s restroom?

18. I think I am a lunatic. A madman who can't even grasp love.

19. Is it itchy? Yes, it is itchy. When the wound grows flesh, nerve endings also grow.

20. Are you tired? Just be tired, comfort is for the dead. < /p>

23. In the spring I planted a girlfriend, and in the autumn I harvested a bunch of men

24. When looking at beautiful women on the street, the higher one is appreciation; the lower one is gangster.

25. I have never regretted it. If you miss it, you will miss it. It is very charming. If you miss it, try it again.

26. I watched the commercial very well... and suddenly a TV series popped up that was very funny. The whole person's mobile phone text message

1. I shouldn't have been so close to you at the beginning, so that I still can't adapt to our sudden distance. I should never have been so good with you, so now I feel so bad. Although you have disappeared from my side, I always think of you inadvertently, wondering how you are doing, how you are eating, and how you are sleeping. Okay, did you think of me at some point? If you hadn't been too noisy, how could I be willing to give away such a cute puppy.

2. I give you 12 zodiac animals, wishing you: smart as a mouse, strong as an ox, bold as a tiger, cute as a rabbit, confident as a dragon, charming as a snake, romantic as a horse, docile as a sheep, naughty Like a monkey, beautiful like a chicken, loyal like a dog, and looks like a pig!

3. Every midnight, I really want to ask you a question but I don’t dare to speak rashly. Especially in the quiet and lonely nights, my thoughts kept me tossing and turning, so I had no choice but to send a text message asking you if you still wet the bed?

4. Everything in life is not calculated, but felt. "It's not something you seek, it's something you cultivate." Seeking is just hoping for results, cultivating is cultivating karma, and feeling is to gain more help, which is just wishful thinking. I don't count on you, I'm so grateful to you. I'm grateful that you've been tricked again and again, and you still throw yourself into my arms. You are my pistachio. Whether I'm happy or not, I always want to tease you no matter what happens - Barbie doll.

5. The first thing I do every morning when I get up is to pinch your chest with my hands to make you ooze white stuff, and then take it into your mouth and taste it. Only in this way will I be energetic all day long. Thank you, my black girl toothpaste!

6. I sent a text message to a girl I like: In fact, I haven’t known you for too long, but I don’t know why I miss you every time. Have you ever experienced that feeling? Well, what is it like? I don’t know how to describe it to you. Just like saying, every time I miss you very much, I want to watch TV because I think there is a program on TV. , everyone on the show replied like you: Oh! What show. Answered.

Animal World

7. According to the aesthetic point of view of the pigeon, you can basically be regarded as a handsome guy; according to the aesthetic point of view of the sheep, you can basically be regarded as a fool; according to the aesthetic point of view of the monkey, you can basically be regarded as an intelligent orangutan. ;According to the aesthetics of a horse, you can basically be regarded as a sloppy person; according to the aesthetics of a donkey, you can basically be regarded as a donkey friend; according to the aesthetics of an ox, you can basically be regarded as a great person!

8. Buddy , what have you been busy with recently? I really miss the carefree and carefree days of chatting and chatting with you. Haha, I saw you that day - the day when you were the most adorable. You were sitting in the sun, feeling so uncomfortable. I asked you what you were doing, and you smiled mysteriously: Keep your voice down, no one will call me an idiot when I get tanned!

9. I looked into her eyes. My heart was pounding. My lips trembled and I was speechless. Beads of sweat gathered on my brows. Then, she opened her little cherry mouth and said, the nine words "Uncle Policeman" that I will never forget, this is this person!

10 , Five hundred times of looking back at the past life were exchanged for one passing by in this life. We have looked back tens of thousands of times in our previous life, and we have become friends in this life! If you cherish this friendship, treat me to a meal to show your appreciation!

11. You look like a pig from a distance, but up close you look like a pig. Think of a tiger, but if you look closely it turns out to be a rat; if you look at it it looks like a rabbit, if you look down it looks like a deer, if you look at the middle it turns out to be a fox; if you look to the left you look cool, if you look to the right you look rich, but if you look carefully it turns out to be rustic, you are Chinese Aboriginal.

12. Weather forecast: I miss you a little from tonight to tomorrow. It is expected that I will continue to miss you in the afternoon. Affected by this mood, I will turn to violent thoughts in the evening and my mood will continue to decrease. It is expected that this weather will continue until I see you. Until you. In order for me to sleep peacefully tomorrow and stop thinking about you, please return the money to me in person so that I won’t miss you so much.

13. You have a fierce face, your skin is covered with hair, and you poop everywhere, which really surprises me! Don’t get me wrong! My friend, I’m talking about the big yellow dog at your door, but it doesn’t have a mobile phone. I have no choice but to send it to you!

14. Yesterday I was talking about a deer as a horse, today I am flirting with a horse. I often work alone, occasionally recruit troops, abandon my childhood sweethearts, make friends with neither donkeys nor horses, be distracted at work, and be voluptuous after get off work. Brother, you are awesome, you are simply blind. Blind horse!

15. I like you very much because you are very cute! You are very good, really, but I have to choose to give up on you because you are too noble and I am not worthy of you! You You are really very noble, only those rich people can get you! You are really too expensive, a piglet is sold for 250 yuan!

16. A car crashed on a bridge; a thunderous high-speed train rear-ended you; Read a book and the whole family will suffer; in the blink of an eye, the price of meat will skyrocket; in the blink of an eye, the city management will be destroyed; in the stock market, you will regret it for the rest of your life; in a car, AIDS will enter your legs; in a scarf, you will delete the posts and seal your mouth; buddy, even though you are unlucky, luck will come your way. The coal truck has arrived home! However, don't be discouraged. I wish you keep up your efforts. I believe that one day, good luck will come from heaven and you will win the jackpot. The unlucky grand prize is yours.

17. Searching for people: This person’s genes are a bit ET, his personality is a bit BT, his weight is MT, he has been engaged in IT for a long time, and often OT at work. He once had a brain CT and found TNT in it! Does anyone know his whereabouts? , quickly dial 911.

18. You don’t understand the importance of learning deeply enough, but I understand it deeply. I heard that you often get distracted, dazed, and doze off in class. This is not okay! Look at me, since I got crazy, I have never dozed off in class again!

19. What a wonderful morning today, I wish you You can sleep in, some people are bored running on the street, some people clean the house diligently, some people take care of girls, some people shamelessly wash their feet, but you are the best friend, tied in a circle and sleep in, haha!

20. It makes me feel so sad to see you today. You have lost weight and look so haggard. I'm holding back my tears, but I still ask you to take good care of yourself! Pork is so expensive now, so every pound you gain is a pound!