Widowed in his later years, can he afford not to give his children a No Country for Old Men party?

People always kidnap in the name of love. -"Chen Guo" There are many kinds of abuse of love. People always kidnap you in the name of love. True love will not turn you into the person you want to be. True love is to get to know you better and then let you be yourself.

Parents' love for their children is often unreserved, and this love will be reversed in the second half of life. "I raise you young and you raise me old" is also a normal thing.

However, is the love between parents and children really equal?

At the age of babbling, parents began to devote themselves to us. When they are old and on the edge of society, are we willing to pay the same love to our parents? Although many people don't want to admit it, the love we give back may not be as much as what our parents give.

Children should be filial, don't wait for relatives. Not all people can be lucky, but parents are still in the best state of life. Not all people are full of filial piety, grateful to their parents and willing to do their best to be filial to their parents.

Some people are even willing to be a third-rate neet, threatening their biological parents with "if you don't give me money, I won't give you pension".

There is a special group of people who are widowed in their later years and only children can rely on them. Then, if they have money but don't send flowers to their children, will they really go to No Country for Old Men in their later years? The three old people told their personal experiences in easy-to-understand language, which not only made their peers learn from them, but also alerted our younger generations.

Money can't buy a child's true filial piety.

Wang Aizhen, 66, doesn't live with her only son. She still lives in the house left by her wife and lives on a pension. She didn't give her son a penny of the pension left by her wife's death. She can still move her legs and feet now, and plans to hire a nanny when she can't move in the future.

There is not much contradiction between the old man and his son and daughter-in-law, but when his wife is still alive, one of their actions makes the old man chilling. My wife loves this only son very much, and almost all their life savings are spent on his son, including the cost of helping him buy a wedding room and raise grandchildren after marriage.

Every month, two-thirds of her and her husband's retirement salary will be borrowed by her son under various excuses. After the granddaughter goes to kindergarten, the son and daughter-in-law are still not financially independent and need the help of the old couple. My wife was ill in hospital and asked her son to borrow money, but her beloved son said, "Mom, it's not that I don't want to help you, but we really can't help it."

The son's "you" and "we" deeply hurt the old man's heart. Originally, I could operate on my wife as long as I raised enough 200 thousand, but my son didn't pay a penny, and my daughter-in-law was even cynical. From my father-in-law's hospitalization to his final death, my daughter-in-law never came to see me once, and my son left in a hurry after only coming twice.

However, when his wife died and his bones were not cold, his son's family of three came uninvited for a pension. A "mother" on the left and a "mother-in-law" on the right shouted very affectionately. As soon as my son's cold heart warmed up, he was cooled back by the next sentence: "Can dad lend me the money to buy a car first?"

Only then did she see her son's sincerity to herself. No matter how much she has paid for her son and daughter-in-law, in their eyes, she is just a cash cow. When they have money and no money, their attitudes towards themselves are completely different. Since money can't buy children's true filial piety, staying in your hands is at least a guarantee for the future. She doesn't want to go the same way for the rest of her life.

The old man kept his salary and savings and stopped spending money for his son. She doesn't want to live in the illusory "filial piety" for the rest of her life, waiting for her son to take the initiative to repent after she spent all her money. When licking calves is not really filial, it is also wise to take care of yourself with all your money after weighing the pros and cons.

Go your own way and let the children talk.

Zhou Dapeng, a 62-year-old man, has a laundry list of things about pensions. He said that he had a son and a daughter. After his wife died, they took turns to do ideological work for themselves and asked him to look after his retirement salary. Don't be cheated by other women after his mother died.

Before he lost his wife, he basically didn't know what it was like to be alone, because his wife lived with him for more than 30 years and never separated. But since his wife died, his life has only been lonely and empty. Both son and daughter have their own careers and families, so it is impossible to stay with him.

But after living in the children's home for a while, he moved back to his own home. Because both children want his salary card and take charge of his economic freedom, which makes him very angry. Simply don't rely on anyone to support yourself. But he is used to relying on his wife, and he is really not used to washing and cooking alone.

After his wife left for more than a year, he took a fancy to a widow in her fifties. The other child is not local. She also has a house and retirement salary. The two had a lot of trouble when they got the license, which means their father met a liar. In a rage, he stopped looking at his two children. In the past, when the two of them had any difficulties, the old man would pay. He hasn't spent a penny for his children since the accident.

The old man surnamed Zhou said that after he remarried, he also sincerely lived with his current lover, and their money was not divided. He doesn't want to spend money on children, and he doesn't want to live on their faces any more. Go your own way and let the children talk. After all, no one can accompany anyone for a lifetime.

The obligation to bring up children to adulthood has been fulfilled.

Finally, the 65-year-old man named Yang Guoliang moved back to his hometown and countryside according to his own wishes after his wife died. He only meets children during holidays and tries not to disturb them when he is free.

It is not that he has no money, on the contrary, he has saved a sum of money before he retired. Many old people like to spend money on their children, but he believes that children and grandchildren have their own blessings, and their obligations as adults have been fulfilled. A pair of children have their own jobs after they go to college, so they don't need to worry about spending money.

Uncle Yang is very open-minded, not only open-minded, but also open-minded. He said that if his children have a problem with not giving money, he can accept it. He doesn't expect them to understand this, but he wants his children to understand that their parents' money is not their own after all, and only when they have it can they really have it.

If he does everything for children when they are mature, they will feel at ease and do nothing. This will hinder the development of children's ability to resist family risks. He will leave one day. At that time, who can a child without survival skills expect?

Not counting the money of the elderly, it is also a kind of filial piety.

Parents love their children, so they have far-reaching influence. But this love can't last forever. As the old man finally said, an adult should learn to be responsible for his future, and practice the skills of making a living by himself all his life, whether he supports the elderly or not.

However, compared with the old people who need to make plans for their old age, as the younger generation, we should be alert: don't rely too much on parents and their money, and it is the old people's own decision to help or not. It is ungrateful to hold a grudge or even give up the original affection because the old man gave up.

The affection between children and parents is a rare fate that not everyone can have. It is a narrow and selfish idea to use parents to spend money on themselves to decide whether to support the elderly.

Old people will also have the right to privacy and independent spending. In fact, it is also a kind of filial piety for children not to interfere and calculate the pension money after their parents are old and weak.