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A classic joke sentence with a happy smile. Talk about Daquan 100 sentence.
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A classic joke sentence with a happy smile
Tell a happy joke
Funny and humorous sentences
A classic joke sentence with a happy smile
1. The bee fell in love with the mouse. Mother bee disagreed anyway, saying: women are afraid of marrying the wrong man. She is short-sighted, so it is difficult for you to marry him. Mother Mouse disagreed and said, Son, all the nurses are dressed like angels in white. You see, it doesn't suit her to wear a tiger skin skirt.
2. A police dog met an ordinary dog on the road and asked, "Which side are you from? I haven't seen you at the station. " The ordinary dog replied: You are all positive people. We all went behind enemy lines and went undercover. That's why you're sure
In order to be cool in summer, dogs and kittens hang a rectangular box on the wall and close the doors and windows. After a long time, the puppy said to the kitten, "Why is it still so hot?" Kitten: "Strange, how can the box hung by human beings make the temperature drop?"
It was very cold in winter, so the puppy moved an electric heater to keep the cock warm. The rooster said, "thank you,no." Its light is like sunlight. When you wake up in the middle of the night, you will mistakenly think that it is dawn and it is time to crow. "
The bear wants to make a duster to dust. Hearing that the rooster's feathers are beautiful, he happily went to the rooster and prepared to borrow some feathers from it. The cock proudly said, "You have the wrong person. I won't lend you my beautiful feathers. " The bear asked, "Why?" The cock said, "haven't you heard the legend that the iron cock is broke?"
6. A gecko was wandering in the swamp when a crocodile came from a distance. His mouth is wide open and he wants to eat gecko. Gecko used his quick wits, hugged the crocodile's leg and shouted "Mom". The old crocodile paused, took off his reading glasses and burst into tears: Son, stop losing weight. Look how thin you are.
7. Frog joke Toad: People say you want to eat swan meat without looking at what you look like. Toad said: I have a dream, you know, a frog in the well.
8. A hen laid a very big egg. The reporter went to interview the hen and asked how it was born. The hen hung her head and said nothing. The reporter asked the rooster, and the rooster said angrily, I'm really depressed. I'll kill the ostrich if I catch it!
9. Fox: It is obviously a high-grade perfume, but they say it is "body odor". Pig: I have a cold, my nose is upset and I can't smell it. However, if I pass by you, I won't cover my nose, lest I be knocked down by you!
10. It's hot, and the dog is lying on the floor shaking all over. Mother dog saw it and asked with concern, "Baby, are you sick?" Dog: "I found it cold in the refrigerator, so I got into it to escape the heat." I didn't expect it to be so cold inside, and I almost froze into a popsicle. "
1 1. Piglets and chickens were playing in the forest when they suddenly found a hungry Xiaohua Mall. The pig said, "It's pathetic. Shall we give it something to eat? " The chicken nodded: "Then make a bowl of preserved egg lean porridge!" " After listening to this, the pig shook his head very excitedly: "How is it possible! You just contributed a by-product, but I want to put my life on it! "
12. One day, a cat and its owner went fishing, and the earthworm family living by the pond were watching the fun. At this moment, I saw the cat staring at the fish caught by its owner and jumping repeatedly. The earthworm son was puzzled and asked his mother, What is the cat doing? Mother earthworm said: bounce off crow's feet! ! !
13. Shrimp and crab * * *, entered the final, and the scores of the competition were the same. Finally, according to their performance, the shrimp won the first place for the simple reason that the crab is too high-profile and has been bullying people, while the shrimp is very low-key and often bows its head forward.
14. The hen gave birth to a duck egg. The rooster was very angry and questioned the hen. The hen said unjustly, it's all my fault. I love beauty so much. My mouth was flat before, so I sharpened it for the sake of beauty. Rooster: ...
15. The lion and the bear shit under the tree respectively. A month later, the lion found that the tree next to his stool was thicker than the bear's, so he said a philosophy full of vicissitudes-lion shit is better than bear shit!
16. "An animal talent show contest was held in the forest. The kitten performed painting plum blossoms, the puppy performed housekeeping skills, the deer performed picking leaves from a tall tree, and the pig performed reading aloud. Now I am familiar with the content. "
17. Owl became a judge, but soon he was forced to take the blame and resign, because the animals reported it one after another, because during the day, he closed his eyes and didn't care about anything; At night, he turned a blind eye, or nothing!
18. I looked east, west, south, north and up and down. I've looked everywhere, but I can't find my heart. Suddenly I understood that you stole it.
19. A middle-aged couple is having a rest and chatting. Wife: Honey, I heard on the news that another boy of 18 years old jumped off a building recently, which is really puzzling! Husband: You think the post-90s generation is a joke!
I have good news for you. After a period of hard study, one of my exercises was finally adopted by an evening newspaper. B: what article is it? A: The missing statement.
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Tell a happy joke
1. A snake in the jungle likes to swallow the sparrow's nest around the trunk. Other snakes thought it was strange and asked why it wanted to eat Nestle. Only this snake gave the other snakes a white look: "Didn't you listen to what humans said?" Then I closed my eyes as if I had an endless aftertaste, slowly exhaled and sighed, "Nestle coffee is delicious!" " "
There is a young mosquito in the air. The spider saw it and said, "handsome boy, come to my house and have a rest." Mosquito said, "Do you have anything interesting there?" The spider said, "Yes, I opened an Internet cafe. Please go online! " "Hearing this, the mosquito plunged into the past.
3. Don't play with rabbits, be careful not to get pink eye, don't play with spiders, do nothing on the Internet all day, don't play with pandas, wear sunglasses and God knows if he is a good man, don't play with pale ropes, and chirp silently all day.
4. Animal testimony: Zebra: I have eaten grass all my life, but I didn't expect to take pictures on the roads of the city. Earthworm: I have been working underground for a long time, and there are more and more ways. Mother: I believe my direction is bright. Python: I am old, but I still can't learn the right path. Owl: When catching mice in the dark at night!
A chicken laughed at the ugly duck, and the duck said unhappily, "I am not as knowledgeable as a slutty chicken." The chicken said disdainfully, "You are not much better. You are just a duck who eats soft rice! " "
6. A group of animals got together and were born. Gecko: "I lost weight among crocodiles." Toad: "I am allergic to frogs." Octopus: "I am innocent among squid."
7. When mosquitoes reach marriageable age, mother said, "Find a spider-like person, at least engage in the Internet!" Dad said, "Find a bat, at least a pilot!" " "At this time, the fly flew over and said," The most important thing is to solve the problem of food and clothing. Look at the one who is reading the short message, which can feast your eyes for a lifetime! " "
8. A woodpecker was catching insects in a big tree when a fox came up and said, "Miss beautiful woodpecker, can you kiss me?" The woodpecker said, "Honey, can I have dinner?"
9. Animals hold low-carbon environmental protection conferences. Kangaroo said, "I bring my own environmental protection bag every time I go shopping, and I never use plastic bags that pollute the environment"; Spider said: "Now the low-carbon era rarely surf the Internet, concentrate on cross-stitch!" " " ; Mosquitoes randomly pressed the silent firefly next to them, and the firefly got angry. "What are you doing? "? I'm looking for the power switch, save electricity! "
10. The donkey and the pony are husband and wife, and they have lived together all their lives. Before he died, the pony asked the donkey, "Do you love me or not? Why have you never kissed me? " The donkey felt like a knife, and said helplessly, "Alas! I love you, but there is a family rule in my family,' the donkey's lips are not right for the horse's mouth'! "
1 1. At the class reunion, the cat led the panda and introduced to everyone: "This is my child." Everyone screamed, "You married a bear." Seeing that the snake didn't get any children, the cat asked, "Why didn't you get children?" Snack: "My family has too many children and I don't know this." Everyone was puzzled. The snake said shyly, "I married a mouse." "A nest of snakes and mice" Everyone screamed.
12. The nightingale sings beautifully. Xiao Lv went to the teacher, but the nightingale refused without thinking. Xiao Lv asked the nightingale angrily, "You really have no talent for singing. The idiom dictionary says that the donkey barks and doesn't change (repeated instructions)! "
13. On Christmas Day, Santa Claus was welcomed in the forest. Santa Claus with a long white beard granted a wish to the animals in the forest. The animals in the forest shouted, "We want to go back to 10 million years ago!" "Santa Claus asked incredulously," why? "All the animals in the forest pointed to the monkeys in the trees and said," Because we want to drive the apes out of the earth! " "
14. A goose and a hen are selling eggs in the market. The hen shouted: double yellow eggs, come and buy them. The goose's mouth was stupid, and it took a long time to shout: big. I took a sip of rice and found that everyone bought eggs. The goose was puzzled and asked why. The egg buyer said: Look, even if people don't sell double yellow eggs, at least they are still in the original ecology, and they are all "squeaky".
15, your round face, so white, curved eyebrows, so slender; A pair of watery eyes, so bright and affectionate voice, so sweet: Wang! Woof! Woof!
16, roses are my passion, candy is my taste, stars are my eyes, moonlight is my kiss, I give them to you, my love, Happy New Year! You are the most beautiful in my heart.
Wife: Boss, give my husband a bottle of rice wine. Boss: Is one bottle enough? Your husband is famous for his drinking. Wife: Drinking may not be enough, but smashing a bottle should be enough.
18, urgent reminder: there is tornado weather recently. When going out, be sure to carry two dumbbells weighing 10 kg with you to avoid being blown to the west by strong winds. Those who weigh less than 50 kilograms must be doubled.
19. On the first night when I moved to my new home, a man broke in in the dark. I can't resist. He stole all my things ... damn grave robbers, and he didn't cover the coffin when he left.
20. The mobile phone can be recharged when placed in the sun. The mobile phone can be soaked in water to prevent aging, and the mobile phone can be placed in the toilet to prevent radiation. These are little-known secrets, and I won't tell most people!
2 1, Daughter: Dad said there was no wild flowers at home. Aren't you jealous, mom? Mother replied: Why are you so narrow-minded? Domestic flowers are wild flowers, and I am also a wild flower in the eyes of others.
22. It is said that there are golden arrows, iron arrows and bronze arrows, but you must learn from silver arrows! It is said that there are 18 kinds of 360 martial arts moves, but you must learn drunken arrows, so soon there appeared in the Jianghu: drunken silver arrows!
23. I spent 150 to get a haircut today. After returning to the dormitory, roommates strongly criticized. At this time, a classmate who has been silent for a long time concluded that this hairstyle is cost-effective. It only took 150, and I also got a haircut of 250.
24. You are standing on the side of the road, waiting anxiously. I rushed to you, and you seemed to close your eyes happily! I am both excited and sorry to say: I am sorry! My headlights are shining on you!
25. A diner deliberately made things difficult for the store and ordered a scrambled egg with duck eggs. I only heard Xiao Er shouting in the kitchen: "The guest officer sitting by the door reading mobile phone messages is really an asshole?
26. Do you fascinate me? I don't feel tired watching you all day. I don't need to blink. I will look at you and accompany you every day. I'm so happy! My favorite mobile phone!
27. When the fat mother applied for the membership card, she said: I am 29 years old now ... The staff looked at it and said doubtfully: How many months? Fat mother struggled for a long time and said that it has been 66 months.
28, Monday, discharged. Tuesday, hand in hand. Wednesday, "First Kiss". Thursday, in love. Friday, beautiful lies. Saturday, romantic "kiss goodbye". Sunday, rotation.
29, the arrival of hot summer, recall the past. The drizzle turned into acacia and fell into sleep. The breeze turns into a blessing, smoothing your busyness. Years are long, I just want to say to you: Have a good mood!
30. I am afraid of the dark. I want your comfort. I am very haggard. I want your comfort. I can't sleep without your concern. I can't face tomorrow without you. I will never learn without you!
3 1, the falling raindrops are tears of missing, and the falling snowflakes are frozen tears. My friend, I will never forget you who once sucked your fingers to wet the bed, hehe.
32. Second brother, fourth brother and starling all like Yang Mi for a reason, because they are the first power, second power and third power of two respectively. They are not afraid to learn math and physics well and travel all over the world!
I saw you in Beidaihe that day. Really, I can't believe my eyes. You stand by the blue sea. I stabbed you with a stick. Hey, this little bastard, his shell is quite hard!
34. Since you were hit by youth, I wish you: hit by happiness on the head, trampled by happiness, searched by health, and kicked around by good luck. I am a good friend!
35. The wolf committed rape. It is said that he will be sentenced to 10 years in prison. He sent a bag of feces to the presiding judge, and the next day he was sentenced to six months' imprisonment with a suspended sentence.
36. Someone asked Picasso, "Why can't I understand your paintings?" Picasso asked him, "Have you ever heard birds chirping?" "yes." "Is it nice?" "Not bad." "Do you understand?
37, small tea and wine to drink, good friends and friends get together. Speak in a small tone, play cards and mahjong. The TV and movies are playing and living a romantic life. Have a good life. I wish you a happy life.
38. Valentine's Day wish: Be a koala and sleep on a big eucalyptus tree. I am a koala and you are a eucalyptus. Amen! Stick to you all my life, love you and need you!
39. The next time I meet you, I will definitely pull you to the bedroom, lock the door, quickly push you down on the bed, cover your head with a quilt, and extend my big hand ... Look, my mobile phone is blue.
40. Banana caught a cold and went to see a doctor. The doctor said: Take off your clothes first! Banana ripped off clothes, and the doctor made a fuss: What's cold? You obviously have a bent spine, so buy a good back!
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Funny and humorous sentences
First, try to get to know those people you hate, and you will find that the more you look at them, the more you hate them.
Second, in the past, mail was very slow, and I only loved one person in my life. Now the network technology is developed, and 50 people can be green in one day.
Third, the new office, the bathroom in the corner, no wifi signal, no 4G signal, quickly cured my constipation for many years.
Fourth, I hope that in the future, you can walk well, and I will take the bus.
Five, don't puppy love. What you are talking about now is someone else's future husband or wife.
6. Research shows that men who love housework live longer because their wives play less.
Seven, the same is sick, other people's friends are caring and attentive, and send medicine to make money; Your friend: Stop bb and hurry up.
8. I just saw a news that both mother and daughter are flight attendants. I don't know what's good about this, just two generations of mother and daughter! Our ancestors were farmers for eighteen generations, and I never show off! Am I proud? Am I bloated?
Son, it doesn't matter if you don't do well in this exam. You are young, your father and I are young. We can have another child.
Ten, I am before the Double Eleven: Thousand Hands Guanyin; Me after the Double Eleven: Venus.
History is always strikingly similar: the year before last, you were single, and last year, this year, you are still single.
Twelve, selling Meng should also be divided into people. Only good-looking people can sell cute, and ugly people can only pretend to be crazy and sell silly.
Thirteen, try not to puppy love when you are young. Knowing that you are unattractive, ugly and short too early will affect the exam.
There are four bankbooks in life: health, emotion, career and money. If health disappears, all other passbooks will expire.
If life deceives you, don't be sad or impatient, because it will continue to deceive you tomorrow.
Sixteen, money can buy a house, but it can't buy a home. Marriage can be bought, but love cannot. You can buy a clock, but you can't buy time. Money is not everything, but it is the root of pain! Give me your money and let me suffer alone. ...
Seventeen, wardrobe clothes Qian Qian absolutely, only the new is the best!
Eighteen, a chubby girl, afraid to take the elevator because she is not confident, insists on taking the stairs to work every day. So, after nearly a month's hard work, she was fired because she was often late.
Nineteen, say what? Let's go on a trip. After work, even if it is a trip to go, it will not work.
Twenty, others look good when they smile, but you are different. You look funny.
2 1. In fact, people in ancient times were quite optimistic, and when they had a little leisure, they pondered how to live forever. After a busy day, modern people calm down and collapse in bed. There are only four words in their hearts: I don't want to live.
Twenty-two, I was busy pretending to be cute and growing up. When I grow up, I am busy dating and taking care of my hair.
Twenty-three, like our age, you must wear a helmet when driving an electric car, otherwise you will be recognized by your classmates when driving a BMW Mercedes-Benz.
Twenty-four, "How old can you accept the difference between your lover and you?" "As long as the face value. Up and down for five thousand years. "
If you think I'm fat, just say it. Don't beat around the bush and say, "You really walked one step at a time!" !
Twenty-six, my object is very good, elephants are also very good to me, and I am very good to horses, rabbits and dogs.
Twenty-seven, people's ideas will change: I used to want to get rich, but now I just want to get rid of poverty.
Twenty-eight, a woman's life-naughty as a child, grow up Taobao, work for gold, marry Taomi, old, eliminated. Women, act quickly while you are still young.
Twenty-nine, although you are already taken, as a senior gardener, what I am best at is replacing trees with flowers.
I am not good at getting pregnant, but I am good at making my stomach bigger and bigger.
If you hurt a girl who really loves you, God will give you a complete bitch.
Thirty-two, looking at beautiful women in the street in summer, looking up is appreciation, looking down is hooliganism.
33. Ambiguity is like "typing". If you wait for a long time, there may be nothing.
Thirty-four, it is said that girls are made of water, gentle and won't lose their temper. Me too. It's just that I'm an elf. I have to hold it. I can't get rid of it. I can't break it. Otherwise, it will explode easily.
Make up your mind every night to change from tomorrow, live a good life and work hard. Turn over under the covers at noon the next day: Shit, some other time.
Thirty-six, it is said that it is difficult for four kinds of girls to find a partner: first, they don't like makeup, second, they are more homely, third, they are men with character, and fourth, they don't act cute. I shed tears when I knew the truth.
Thirty-seven, I thought life was about cats eating fish, dogs eating meat, and Altman hitting monsters. The reality is that the mouse plays the cat, the sheep plays the wolf, and two bears play Logger Vick to death. It's not that we are not strong, but that the world is crazy!
When a man really falls in love with you, you will find: Hey! One more father; When a man falls in love with you falsely, you will find that he is still a rebel after having another son.
When girls go to worship Buddha, they must remember: no makeup! If it succeeds, the Bodhisattva will protect you, and I'm afraid she won't find you!
Forty, the sky didn't fall on my head, but it still hurts my heart and bones.
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