Classic funny sayings, sphere is also a kind of figure.

1, when everyone can use each other, it's because the other side is not strong enough.

2. I am convinced that your musical talent is definitely not a mere display of sound.

3, alive, just to leap in embarrassment.

The reason why Pig Bajie has to learn from the scriptures is because he has never met Chang 'e like you.

You are a frog in the well, or you haven't even reached the well.

6. I really want to now, but my mood is salty and fragrant.

7. I tried to control the magic in my heart, but I ignored that you might just be the ghost who played soy sauce.

8. If you are drunk, you will know that your friend is stupid. If you have loved, you will know your stupid hat.

9. Who said that the power of zero money is small? You know, two dollars can't stop a new life from being born smoothly.

10, I don't like her, I like my script, but my script is that I love her deeply.

1 1. I once missed my love and couldn't change it, but I never really loved it.

12, a good horse never turns back to the grass, so I never turned back and walked around in circles, only to meet the grass again.

13, I think you are a professional weaver, specializing in catching penguins.

14, you are nothing special, but your face is strong enough.

15, my advantage is that I can correct my mistakes ... My disadvantage is that I keep a low profile.

16, if something happens, don't let your feelings sow at will, or they will take root and sprout. If you want to pull, you have to toss and turn, but you can't pull.

17, your outstanding, cross-description: exquisite facial features, vague combination.

18, a sphere is also a figure!

19, nonsense is the first sentence in interpersonal relationship.

20. Nothing that can be solved with money is a problem, but I am poor.

2 1, people say it's romantic to do ghosts under peony flowers. Now there are no peonies, only a bunch of hibiscus flowers, but I don't want to be romantic even if I live.

22. It's perfect to combine so many bad habits of human beings. I believe that it is a pity that Raytheon can't touch you when you go out in the rain.

23. Spring comes, young trees sprout and the stock market turns green.

24. I live in a humble abode and live a timid and angry life.

25. Going out for a walk is not for me. My biggest wish is to sit in front of the computer and meditate on Sunday.

26, a rose is long, 99 roses are still long, not 99 roses are relatively extravagant for a long time.

27. Even though I am small, I am still great when I try to live for myself, but I don't know the size of greatness.

28. It is said that beauty matches the beast, so I will be a beast for a while.

Vulgarity is a breakthrough, especially when elegance and nobility don't work.

30. It's not that my happiness must be based on your pain, but that you should let your pain make me happy.

3 1, there was once a woman who wanted to transform me. As a result, she only dismantled my parts and never put them on me again.

Why do we all give darkness to the devil? Because they are brave and not afraid of the dark.

You are very kind, especially when you are sorry for others.

34. The first love is beautiful because it tells us that there will be more next love.

35. When you chase the prince charming in your heart, the frog waiting for you is actually a prince and will be caught.

36. Ugliness is not your fault, nor is stupidity your fault. However, taking ugliness and stupidity to the extreme cannot be used to flaunt one's great cause. Be modest.

Lying is a man's privilege and being cheated is a woman's patent.

Talking about Daquan obesity is also a kind of figure.

1, with your understanding, you may not understand what I explained. So, your legacy is very small.

2. Me Before You, my world is black and white. After knowing you, wow, it's all black.

Among good friends, you must cultivate a bosom friend. Don't think you are so versatile and have many friends. In the end, there is only one person who is sincere to you. Trust me.

4. The internet makes me ignore the reality, but I have been struggling, but no one understands how tired I am. I won't stay, I will be fine. ...

Life will not be kind to us forever, and there will be setbacks and failures. We should learn to face it calmly with a philosophical attitude towards life and meet it with a calm and indifferent attitude. When we regard these as precious wealth of life, the sky in our hearts will not be overcast all the time. Cherish these experiences, treat your life well, and believe that the bright sunshine will definitely fall in every corner of the world.

No matter how bad your grades are, you can still smile. This is the dignity of a school scum.

7. Fat is attitude, meat is spirit, and fat is also figure.

8. At that time, you were a butterfly, I was a fallen flower, my heart was broken, and the butterfly's wings were far away; At that time, you were a clear spring, and I was a crescent moon, inseparable and empty; At that time, you were a pipa, and I was a string, singing in troubled times and feeling deeply in the world. The blood-stained paintings in Jiangshan are not as good as the vermilion in your brow, but they are just prosperous. As long as you smile like a flower, I would like to abandon the picturesque scenery and return to the imperial armor, and I will lose a drunken battle with you.

9. Don't read what you shouldn't, don't say what you shouldn't say, don't listen to what you shouldn't hear, and don't think about what you should do.

10, people's looks are divided into two categories: one is natural beauty and the other is natural inspiration.

1 1, I lost myself unconsciously. When will the people who love me come back?

12 I suddenly found an interesting rule: whether we watch a love drama or a youth idol drama, at the end of the day, the hero and heroine get married, and the TV or movie will be over. What does this mean? This profound explanation: as long as a man and a woman get married, there is no future!

13, I didn't know until I entered the examination room. What do you mean, I can cry without tears, and I can't shit.

14, I didn't know how ugly it was to follow someone else's ass until I was wishful thinking.

15, as long as you think it's right, do it, stick to it, don't care about other people's opinions, even if it's wrong, at least you have done it to prove that you have tried.

16, the distance between people should be kept well, too close will stab people, too far will hurt people.

17, I hope that the telephone, Internet, high-speed rail and plane will not be invented, so you may not miss it, so you come to see me.

18, study hard and want to go to school every day.

19, the poppy is beautiful, but I have lost the courage to approach it.

20. The deadly winter is coming. If anyone can install air conditioning in our classroom, we will marry the head teacher.

Network classic quotations: the second complete works;

1, just because the crowd looked at you one more time, I was blind.

2. Let me tell you some terms about 1: 1 is Little Singles Day, 1 is1and 1 1 is Middle Singles Day. Male bachelors are called bachelors, female bachelors are called bachelors, and right is right. The mascot of Singles' Day is four fried dough sticks and 1 egg. Starting from 1, it is11. Recently, friends on the Internet are discussing the possibility that the lunar calendar 1 1 and October 1 1 coincide.

I didn't know until I finished the exam that I had so many things I couldn't do.

4, waiting for a discovery, waiting for a touch, let love boil again.

Everyone has inertia, which is innate, but we can change this inertia the day after tomorrow, because many people are changing. Don't wait for someone else to do something or business before I think of it. Don't wait for others to make money before I want to do it. No one believes in markets and opportunities, but everyone believes in inflation.

6. I will not give up and continue to preview; I don't doubt that a miracle will happen. I want to light a dazzling red light for myself in the future! I'm going to die anyway. So what? At least I'm strong, I'm open!

7. Go to a martial arts restaurant for lunch, where the taste is average and the price is relatively cheap. The characteristic is that everything there has a martial arts style. Call the customer a guest officer and the waiter a junior. The name of the dish is also a martial arts style. Braised pig's trotters are eighteen palms of the dragon, and the mutton pot is called Jiuyang Magic. At noon, while eating magic of Jiuyang, a Xiao Qiang ran around the table. As soon as he got angry, he called Xiao Er over. When Xiao Er saw it, he shouted: There is an assassin!

8. You bitch like to take advantage too much. If you took someone else's real hand short, you would have been paraplegic.

9. I will hold the audience! The cook thought viciously, picked up a packet of salt and poured it all into the soup.

10. Don't often surf the Internet to do boring things and play meaningless games in your spare time. Read some literary works and learn some business processes, management norms, international current affairs and legal knowledge. This will ensure that you have something to talk about at any party.

1 1, people who are willing to suffer losses, after all, can't eat losses, suffer more losses, and there is always a thick report; People who love to take advantage will definitely not take advantage of it, winning small profits but losing big money. No matter how good things are, they can't be owned for a long time, and they can't be returned for a while. Nothing can win people's hearts more than always showing sympathy and love. Don't think that success or failure has no cause. Today's bitter fruit is yesterday's sowing. What you give now is what you get tomorrow.

12, the inspiration is what God whispered to you, but God is too busy to tell you again.

13, stress is inevitable, insomnia is helpless, so don't worry, don't be upset, accept it calmly. If you can't hide, go on. Can't sleep at night, sleep during the day.

14, you are gold, I am coal, you will glow and I will heat up. Don't mess with me, or I will melt you.

15, [The so-called Singles' Day is an early warning signal the day before the mid-term exam]

16, you have the right to remain silent, and everything you say will be archived. You can find a proxy server. If you can't afford it, the network will assign one to you.

17. A man who doesn't prepare lucky money for his wife is not a good husband, and a woman who doesn't buy new clothes for her husband is not a good wife.

18, everyone has his own destiny, don't be jealous of people and things he won't touch. Lucky one.

19, proverbs of life ① An open enemy is better than a despicable friend; (2) honest dissidents are better than treacherous confidants; 3 I would rather be looked down upon at first than be hated later; Communication without trust is like a mobile phone without network signal, which is only suitable for playing games by itself.

20. Jiang Zhishu, Hu Yifei, Guli and Gu Yuan, four great scholars, blessed me to turn over in the senior high school entrance examination.

Classical quotations about the network;

1, old advice: Daughter, you should eat properly to lose weight!

2. What is personality disharmony? Because you don't like this person's excuse anymore. When you fall in love, what is right, and when you don't fall in love, what is wrong.

It was that night, in the boiling and warm pool water and the advanced LED electroluminescence under the water, that I suddenly understood what the adults had said before: life is force majeure, which is the only overlord clause in the contract that no one can ever change. -Jing M.Guo's Tiny Times 3

4. A bachelor's signature was changed to: People who secretly love me, how can you be so calm! ! !

5. Transferred from Cauchy: Transferred from Taylor: Transferred from Weierstrass: Transferred from Leibniz: Transferred from L'H?pital: Transferred from Newton: Transferred from Lagrange: Transferred from Fermat: Transferred from Rolle: Young man, I hope you won't fail the final grade.

6. Outside this cloud nine, he is the only one for me. I have been thinking about holding the child's hand with him after the birth, watching the sea of clouds churn and the golden sky flow. He doesn't know how important light is to me. -to the sky kingdom, seven sons of the Tang Dynasty.

Mother gave me a toothpick, and I want to pry the earth.

8. We are always looking for ourselves. In movies, novels and plays, people there have their own shadows, and then they sit down accordingly. In my heart, I am getting farther and farther away, and I am already blurred. Anyway, don't lose yourself, remember the way you came. We all have to find ourselves and be ourselves. No eyes, no ears, no tongue, no body, no sound, no smell, no touch, only when you find yourself will others find you!

9. I once told myself that if you can't move your heart, try not to move. If I really move my heart, I should at least keep silent, so that at least I can not hurt my self-esteem. However, at that moment, I was in tears. Turn around and run away, afraid to look again. -Canoe "Stars in the Deep Sea"

10, the price of success ① The world is not in the hands of people who laugh at it, but in the hands of people who can stand ridicule and criticism and keep moving forward; ② Work needs cost, and time is also a kind of cost. Cherishing time means saving costs; ③ Action is a good medicine to cure fear, and hesitation and procrastination will constantly nourish fear; It is wise to invest in knowledge, and it is even more wise to invest in the knowledge in the network.

1 1. Sexy women are not coquettish, and playboy men are the meanest.

12, the philosopher said that the difference between wisdom and cleverness is that smart people know how to choose and get rid of entanglements, which can make us more open-minded and live more freely. When you are struggling, tell yourself that you are going to lose something. Choose watermelon and bravely throw away sesame seeds.

13. Everything has a shelf life. Can there be love after the shelf life?

14, San Xiao is the greatest woman in the world. She takes responsibility to help you recognize the true face of a man.

15, A: Sister, if someone hurts you, how long will you forgive him? B: It's God's business to forgive her. My task is to send her to God. . . .

16, tired, often hovering between persistence and giving up, indecisive. The trouble is that you have a good memory. What should be remembered and what should not be remembered will remain in memory.

17, in this life, I am afraid that two teachers and doctors, teachers, thugs and doctors will play PP.

18, I stood alone in the lost street, but the vague past gradually became clear.

19, footprint is a silent language, greetings are the blooming of flowers, blessings are the rushing of hearts, messages are the sails of friendship, and meeting you online is a kind of fate. May fate maintain our friendship; Meeting your blog is a kind of beauty. May it shine in your life. Knowing you in life is a kind of happiness. I sincerely wish my friends happiness and always accompany you!

20. Linking Gong Rulu on thin ice with a series of Qing Dynasty dramas is a living movie "Girls Chased in Yongzheng Years".

Classic love quotations: fooling around is also a kind of dependence.

1. Modern people live in illusion. He thinks she knows what she wants, but in fact, he just wants what he is expected to want.

No matter how you choose, as long as it is your own choice, there is no right or wrong regret. The past you will not satisfy the present you, and the present you will not satisfy the future you. Have the courage to choose, but also have the courage to bear the consequences. When a person grows up, he dares to face himself bitterly: before choosing, he has a sincere and firm face; After choosing, there is a heart that will never change.

3, I only love to lose my temper with you, because I subconsciously believe that you will not leave me. Pranks are also a kind of dependence.

I drew a ring on the ring finger of my left hand, dreaming that one day, I can't bear my joys and sorrows alone any more.

I am willing to shake hands with the world and make peace with it gently. Perhaps it was witnessing life and death that made me suddenly realize how much I wanted to meet someone and become a useful person. Principles are not so important, the bottom line is not so rigid, and compromise does not mean weakness. Let yourself relax and you can get rid of the heavy past.

I got seven smiles and three dirty eyes along the way. I use 70% of my strength to respond to a smile and 30% of my strength to respond to a supercilious look; The food I eat is delicious for 7 times and unpleasant for 3 times, so I enjoy it with 70% taste and endure bitterness with 30% taste. I have no intention of amplifying the goodwill or malice of the world. I just receive sunny and rainy days in proportion at the scene. The world and I, only each other. Kevin Tsai

7. I want to talk about an aboveboard love. My parents know, and so do his parents. When I am bored, my mother will naturally say, "Call him and ask him to take you out to play."

8. I miss you, but I can't tell you, just like a tree full of pears, it will never bear apples. I miss you, but I can't tell you, just like a rainbow hanging high in the sky, no one can ever touch it. I miss you, but I can't tell you, just like the track of a train, there will never be a boat passing by. I miss you, but I really can't tell you. I'm scared. I'm scared. It's torture for you, too.

9. I believe that people who have been suppressed in this world are soft at heart. This softness is half kindness and half cowardice. When a person can't win the world and convince himself, weakness becomes a sharp weapon to torture himself and cut his life bit by bit.

10, I hope you are happy, because that is my greatest wish. I am afraid that you will be happy, because then you will forget me.

1 1, I think you are very happy, because you can choose to love me or not, and I can only choose to love you or love you more.

12, I clearly know that without despair of life, there will be no love for life. People can create within some prescribed boundaries. However, love has no boundaries. If I can embrace everything, what does it matter if I am clumsy?

13, I'd rather live a quiet and imperfect life than pretend to be perfect all my life.

14, we always meet the best love in an age when we know nothing about love.

15, we always think that we will find someone we love very much. But when we look back, we realize how naive we are. If you never start, how do you know if you will love that person very much?

16, we always like some people when we are unprepared. There is no reason, maybe it's just a gentle smile and a caring greeting. Maybe we have never met, maybe we have no common interests, maybe we are not at the same height, but we all keep it in mind. Just like liking a song, it is often because a melody or a lyric touched you. Like it or hate it is a puzzling thing.

17, in our life, we always see many people who are much better than ourselves. If you always see people worse than you, then you should reflect on whether your life is constantly sinking. If you often meet people you expect in the process of progress, congratulations, you are making progress. You will feel inferior, but this inferiority can be turned into motivation.

18, what we complain about later is often the first love. Things have not changed, the environment has changed, the scenery has not changed, the eyes have changed, others have not changed, and they have changed. Only when we complain, if we can look back and think about why we chose him, love him and appreciate him. If he is still the same as he was then, let's try to see it again with youthful eyes. -Liu Yong

We are all insecure people. Even though I know it's unreasonable, I just want to prove my importance.

20. We all thought there were some things we couldn't let go. Over time, when you look back on the past, you will find that what you once thought could not be put down was just a springboard of life. If you skip it, you can become more exciting. The most difficult thing for people on the springboard is not the moment of take-off, but the inner struggle and helplessness before take-off. We thought we couldn't jump, so we closed our eyes and got up the courage to jump.

Mood: forgetting is also a kind of happiness, and letting go is also a kind of deep love.

First, some lyrics are deeply rooted in people's hearts, whether we listen to songs or ourselves.

You should remember that he likes staying up late, smoking and being lonely, so you should urge him to sleep, smoke less and talk to him more every day.

Third, don't lose your future in the vast sea of people.

Fourth, sometimes, there are some words and things that I only hope people who want to know can understand.

Don't let the quiet and mellow life be defeated by bravado and excitement.

6. Don't let others get you casually, or you will be easily forgotten.

All my self-righteous pride is the light you projected into my heart and then reflected back.

Eight, when the rain quietly covered the tears, memories began to fade in my heart.

Memories make me stay in the sad past, so that I can't see the happiness now.

She cried and begged him not to go, okay? I won't quarrel with you again, and I won't quarrel with you again.

Sometimes I look back at my own story and feel sorry for myself.

I'm standing in the middle of the intersection, waiting for you to take me home.

Thirteen, give up what you should give up is helplessness, give up what you shouldn't give up is incompetence, don't give up what you should give up is ignorance, and don't give up what you shouldn't give up is persistence.

Fourteen, it has always been your own strong support, and you deserve it. No one was hurt.

Fifteen, forgetting is also a kind of happiness, and letting go is also a kind of deep love.

Our destination has been forgotten. Maybe I have arrived.

I believe you will be someone I will never forget, even if your heart belongs to someone else.

That girl is like a proud rose and never depends on anyone.

Nineteen, the place where you can't go out is your heart.

Twenty, time will not make people feel painless, nor will it make people forget the pain, but it will make people get used to it.

2 1. Look back once in a while, otherwise you will always be looking for it and never know what you have lost.

Life is getting more and more depressing, and you are becoming less and less like yourself. Where are you? You always like things you can't catch.

What saddens me more than losing you is that you have never tried to be with me.

Twenty-four, there is an impulse not to run this relationship, because the mind is trembling and the brain is in control.

No one comforted me when I was sad, so I learned to talk to myself.

Good love makes you see the whole world through one person, while bad love makes you abandon the world for one person.