It's funny when you're in a bad mood. I said: the moral integrity is too heavy. Hang it on my body and I will throw it away.

1. If teachers of Chinese, mathematics, English, physics, history, geography and politics come into the classroom at the same time, what will you think of? "Eight-Nation Alliance's war of aggression against China. "

2. It was too heavy to hang on my body, so I threw it away.

3, the old vine is faint, there are fish and shrimp for dinner, air-conditioned WiFi watermelon, sunset, are you ugly? Nothing! I am blind!

4. Some people say that I am handsome. I stood on the balcony and thought about it all night. Who leaked the news?

It is foolish to do good deeds without leaving a name. Lei Feng also knows that it is written in his diary.

6. When summer comes, I find that "staying in a cool place" is really not a swear word. It is definitely the most sincere concern and the deepest love.

7. If you don't listen, you don't understand, if you understand, you don't do it, you make a mistake, you don't recognize it, you don't change it, you don't accept it, and you don't say it! What do you want me to say about you?

There are no roads in the world, and there are too many people wandering around, so I don't know how to get there.

9. I always feel that I was British when I took the Chinese exam, China when I took the English exam, and I found myself an alien when I took the math exam.

10, God opened a window, ready to give me wisdom; But god didn't want to give me a good face. He wanted to close a window, so I rushed over. It was too late, and my face hit the window, and it became like this!

1 1. God closed the door for you. When he forgets to open the window for you, you can open the ceiling yourself.

12, I don't like to tidy my room. They all call me a messy room hero.

13. Why don't I have an extremely handsome deskmate, but my deskmate does?

14, we haven't eaten for several days, and everyone looks like pancakes.

Watch funny when you are in a bad mood. Tell me about it.

Uncle, you look great, like a stick.

When buying baked sweet potatoes, please ask the boss loudly, what is this stuffing?

What should I do? My first kiss is gone again.

Why didn't the big bottle of drinks come again?

Who told me that you are terrible when you are old, and dinosaurs are still extinct?

Elder sister was so low-key, but the robbers discovered the existence of my family's silver.

He knows that twisted melons are not sweet, but he doesn't like eating melons.

There is a heart with a tube, but there is a periodic body. Actually, I should be handsome.

I watched a very funny TV series today, and went to see a thunderstorm together.

Donor, put down the butcher knife and become a Buddha and shave your head.

There are two kinds of poisons in the world, one is Shakespeare and the other is Qiong Yao.

I am not a dissolute woman, and I am not a person when I am dissolute.

I want you to know that I am born beautiful without any preservatives.

Men who are bad to women will make sanitary napkins in their next life.

I can't think of my sister, my wife and sister, and I can't ride my sister.

Don't miss me when you are distressed, only when your eggs hurt.

Behind every woman you miss very much, there is always a man who wants to throw up every day.

It's not just romance, it's adultery, and you can expect pornography further.

You are shameless. You think the whole world is your mother and everyone wants to spoil you.

A fox is a woman who makes a man look like a dog.

Powerful women are not necessarily attractive, such as extinct teachers.

Appearance is not outstanding, performance is not outstanding, lumbar disc herniation.

Pretending to be cute can solve the problem of population expansion in an instant

Don't believe in love at first sight, because you can't see how much money the other person earns at a glance.

If I need pain in exchange for your touch, fuck you.

When you are young, you can be full of energy, affectation, creativity, luxury and vitality.

Just because you show half your ass doesn't mean you're sexy, it only means your underwear is small.

You say you treat women like dogs, so can you treat dogs like women?

I will be a man in the next life, without much blood, being fucked and having children.

You know, women are less likely to die of excessive blood loss than men.

Why do I smell leucorrhea when you open your mouth?

Don't dislike my small breasts, you are less than 8cm.

So you like her because she has a big mouth.

Watch it when you are in a bad mood. Tell me something interesting.

My relationship with the media is very unusual. The food I ate was reported in the news.

"Doctor, what about big pores?" "The pixel drops."

I really want to eat a set meal for girls without worries in Meng Dan.

The sentence "one step at a time" is definitely the most pungent satire on fat people.

No one has died since ancient times, and the rivers are vast.

The simplest emotion between people is mutual contempt.

The funniest thing is to step on the carpet of "safe passage" and fall down.

People are really stupid when they are full, but smart from the inside out when they are hungry.

Youth is a dandelion, seemingly at ease, but actually it can't help itself.

The partial eclipse of the sun is actually caused by children not eating well every day.

Society is a carriage. Those without seats encourage rebellion, while those with seats call for stability.

Beauty and ugliness have a life, fat and thin in the sky, and live by this sentence.

The main contradictions faced by contemporary youth are: food and weight loss.

If you can be meticulous with me, I will be naked with you!

I want to be a bully, but I can't. I want to stop studying, but I can't. It's fucking pathetic.

My love for you is as vigorous as a tractor climbing a hill.

At best, you are supercilious; In the worst case, you are blind.

A flat chest is poor for three generations, but a thick waist destroys a lifetime. Big face is not a disease, but thick legs are fatal.

My clients have abused me thousands of times, and I regard them as my first love.

Can you stop being angry with me and have a baby?

Some stick to the end, some stick to the bottom, and some stick to Detroit.

Although I don't like seafood, mermaids are acceptable.

It is mine. Do not move. It's not mine. You put it there.

Facing the sea, spring is blooming, so I can only set it as my screensaver.

You must have serious procrastination, otherwise, you are still alive.

Others live a life, but they live an adventure.

No neck is changing with each passing day, and there is nothing the cosmetic industry can do.

Just each other's spare tires, really confidantes.

If Tencent Weibo is a vegetable versus a zombie, then Sina Weibo is an angry bird.

Life lies in exercise? How can a turtle live so long without moving? !

Ass is the easiest place to get dirty, because there is a word called falling dust.

The fat man's song of youth is really the adventure of meat buns.

People who say I don't have to lose weight are bad people.

Thanks to my being a fat man, I can pinch my stomach when I am sad.

There is no road on the road, and there are more people walking, so there is a toll station.

I like exams so much that I basically take them twice in every course.

Wishes are made, not realized.

Secret love is even worse than mail, and the mail loss rate is 100%.

The man shed tears, but didn't cut the onion.

I will always have you in my heart, as long as you are not too crowded.

Writing poetry is actually very simple, just need to have the Enter key on the keyboard.

I must be smart when I am with you, lest others say: What a pair of fools.

Commitment is like fart, earth-shattering, and then it's gone.

So I put salt on your wound. That's because I'm hungry.

I lie prone on my book. It doesn't matter whether I study. The key is to have posture.

Sleep well, roommates are very important.

Before the exam: I will go! The exam is over! After the exam: I will take the exam! It's over.

Prices are rising so fast that I always pay in advance when I eat in restaurants.

Are people who play Tetris well better at cleaning up their rooms?

The rice is too hard, but fortunately there is a bowl of soup to serve.

Always walking by the river, how can you not wet your shoes? Since your shoes are wet, take a bath!

Standing in the bungee jumping place, what do you think most? I want to pee anyway!

Dare to change your brain capacity and stomach capacity!

Wukong said, "Except the clouds that follow, everything else is floating clouds." .

Cigarettes are naughty. Let's smoke them comically.

Live well, because we will die for a long time! ! !

We should keep quiet when listening to the sermon in the church. It is impolite to disturb others' sleep.

People are not smart and bald like others! !

I always wander between cow A and cow C.

So many people despise me. Who are you?

I love you! What do you care?

Chopin, no matter how awesome B is, it can't play out Lao Tzu's sadness!

As long as the hoe jumps well, where can you dig down the corner?

There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage or money!

The reason of constipation is that the gravity of the earth is too small.

I don't know if I went to college or if college fucked me.

Most people only do three things in their lives: deceive themselves, deceive others and be deceived by others.

Pain is an enjoyment that only sober people can have …

Don't be lazy with me, I'm too lazy to compete with you.

University is learning!

I have a left dragon, a right white tiger and Mickey Mouse tattooed on my shoulder.

Other people's money and wealth are things other than me.

Can't afford to sleep in the morning; Sleep at night!

I've been really busy recently, and it's hard to guarantee even 0/6 hours' sleep a day/kloc!

Why do you need to sleep for a long time to live? You will fall asleep after death.

What men say about inner beauty refers to inner beauty, not inner beauty.

If you have a pair of wings, you should be braised …

What's the use of being handsome? Can I swipe my card with my face at the bank?

It is said that men become bad when they have money. I have been a good person for more than 20 years!

When arguing with others, take a step back; When chasing a girlfriend, take a step back and go to an empty building.

It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually streaked in Too Many Cooks for 20 years!

Look at a beautiful MM, but there is no way to strike up a conversation. A brick on the side of the road, picked it up and went forward. "Classmate, did you drop this?"

A real warrior dares to face the balance on the bank card and the figures on the weighing scale.

The best way to encourage yourself is to appreciate yourself, and the best way to deceive yourself is to appreciate yourself.

People always want to let ghosts and gods know when they do good things, but they always feel that ghosts and gods don't know when they do bad things. We are too embarrassed for ghosts and gods.

I have done many stupid things, but I don't care at all. Friends call it "confidence".

Eating is not a crime, and people who are fatter have the right to gain weight! Slim is actually gaunt behind, and people who love you don't care about your waistline! Taste the long-lost food! Even death is a kind of beauty!

Tell a woman who likes sports: everything makes a pot.

Cigarettes are naughty, so we smoke.

Happiness is a serious little thing.

I'm pretty, so I don't need to boast.

Eat a candy when you are sad and tell yourself that life is sweet.

Life is a lamp and work is oil. If the light is on, come on!

Change is not innovation, no direction is not progress, only breaking is not development.

Cooking paste, cooking paste, playing cards is not paste; Hypertension, hyperlipidemia and low salary!

Modern people's living conditions: attend today's class, sleep yesterday's sleep and spend tomorrow's money.

What is a white-collar worker? Today, I got paid, paid the rent, utilities, bought oil, rice, instant noodles, felt the money left in my pocket, and lamented: this month's salary is white-collar again!

People have plenty of backgrounds, and I only have my back.

Now people who can earn 200 Jin of pork a month are barely white-collar.

It is said that when you meet love around the corner, TMD, if you are not careful, you will be hit by a car when you turn the corner!

Why go when there is no way out? Just take the bus

Do you think I'll watch you die? I'll close my eyes!

Tucao is used to count money, not to reason! !

If something goes wrong, look for the reason from yourself first. Don't blame the earth for its lack of gravity when you are constipated.

If one day I become a hooligan, please remember to remind me that I was innocent.

Looking for him in the crowd, suddenly looking back, that person still despises me …

The furthest distance in the world is not the ends of the earth, but I am in telecom and you are in Netcom. ...

God gave us acne while giving us youth!

Go to today's class and sleep yesterday's sleep!

After all, I can't outrun that BMW, so I can only watch it go away in the sunset. It's not that my engine is broken, but that my chain has fallen off.

Look into my eyes and you will see persistence and sincerity except chewing gum.

The boy next door finally vowed to lose weight-at the graduation job fair, someone said to him, "Sorry, buddy, you're blocking my cell phone signal.