Good and bad words for children

Good and bad words for children

Good and bad words for children. The power of language is magical. A person may be positive for a lifetime because of one sentence, or it may be because of Losing self-confidence with just one word. Therefore, when talking to children in life, you should pay attention to what is good and bad for the child. Good and bad words for children 1

1. "You decide..."

If you want your child to do something, or if you want to prevent him from doing something At this time, you can say something like this - "You decide,..." to give him a clear understanding: I decide my actions myself, and at the same time I am responsible for my own actions.

For example, if your child is making a fuss with his friends at home, you can say to them: "Such a loud sound will affect the neighbors' rest, so you decide whether to be quieter or go to the house." "Go outside to play?"

If they have chosen to go out to play, but they are still yelling in the house after 5 minutes, you can continue to say: "You just agreed to go outside Let’s go play, right?”

In this way, children can be taught to understand that making choices means bearing consequences, and it can also prevent parents from always playing the role of a bad policeman who restrains them. You choose and you are responsible for it, and that is true freedom.

2. "I love you, but I don't like your behavior."

Teaching and restraint are always necessary for children of. But you must separate his bad behavior from the person he is - this will help both you and him understand that bad behavior does not mean the person who did it is a "bad person."

While you are disciplining him, tell him: "I point out bad and unacceptable behavior for you because I love you, even though I don't like this behavior, but I love you! ”

This can also remind yourself that your purpose is to correct and guide your child’s naivety and ignorance to make him more lovely and outstanding, not just to teach or punish. .

At the same time, this will also enable you to remain calm and peaceful when facing your children, instead of showing low-quality roars that do not serve as a role model.

3. "You have to know that different people have different needs."

When your child repeats the phrase "This is not fair!" What you need to do is not to scold or ignore him, but to patiently let him understand this truth:

In fact, everyone does not necessarily get equal treatment. In this case, The true meaning of "fairness" is actually "everyone gets this thing when he needs it."

So, if you buy a gift for a relative’s child, don’t buy another gift for your own child to show “fairness” or “comfort.” Just imagine if another child is sick, does your child also need to take medicine?

4. "Tell me what you really think!"

When your child is irritated, he is likely to say those ugly words: " You bastard!” or “I hate you!” Because these are the most “brutal” and most relieving words they can think of (or imitate) when they are emotionally intense.

But as a parent, you need to help your child understand his own emotions more deeply - what exactly irritates him and makes him feel angry (or uneasy, aggrieved, etc.), and help him Analyze the entire facts.

For example, when he is temporarily confused, you can give him some help: "Are you unhappy because Nana told others the little secret you told her?"

Based on the facts, help your child control his emotions and teach him what to think at such moments, so that he can be at peace and be able to have a good relationship with others. In this way, they can learn to control and ease their emotions when their parents are not around in the future.

There are four things you should not say:

1. "Is this something a child your age would do!"

When When a 5-year-old cries because he can't get what he wants, or a 4-year-old refuses to sit still on the bus, he is actually being a child his age." Things that should be done.

Of course, if the child behaves more mature, sensible, and decent, the parents will be very satisfied and happy, but when you ask him to be "reasonable", you are actually not figuring out why he is there. The reason for such "unreasonable" behavior was that he said such reproachful words before.

At this time, what you really care about is the impact your child has on you (making you embarrassed or embarrassed). Really care about his feelings, understand him and give him enough consideration and sympathy - is he feeling bored staying here? Or is he hungry?

2. "You are such a useless child!"

Joking with your child seems to be a good way to develop his humorous ability, but words such as "You forgot again" "If you don't tighten the bottle cap, are you brainless?" Such "jokes" are likely to make children feel hurt or discouraged.

Although some parents think that laughing at their children in this way may help them endure more complex interpersonal relationships in the future - they will become "strong" because of such "training" !

This is wrong. As the child's parent, your task is to love him, support him, help him, and teach him, instead of hiding this kind of pretentious "frustration training" in a "joke." If you don't really think he is stupid and useless, then please don't say that.

3. "Why can't you be like other people's children!"

The most direct effect of this method of comparing children with others is to let the children themselves Feeling like a second-class citizen while exacerbating his antagonism towards others.

Perhaps parents want to use this comparison to make their children more obedient or study harder, but it will not have any better effect besides lowering their children's self-confidence.

The more you tell him that he is not good enough, the more he will feel that he is not good enough. Parents must believe in their children's strengths and at the same time face their children's weaknesses. The right way is to guide children to pay attention to their own behavior and promote or improve it.

4. "Don't run! You will fall down!"

Maybe parents think that their care and reminders are considerate, but your warning is actually telling them He said "I've already met you and you will fall" - this will make the child feel very frustrated. The harder he tries (to do better), the more he will fail ("if he runs, he will fall")!

In fact, you can tell him to "tie his shoelaces before going out to play." At this time, you are talking about his shoes and equipment preparation, not the child's "incompetence." Moreover, the more you try to warn something not to happen, the more your child will tend to ignore your reminder, because he feels that you don’t know what you are talking about! Good and bad words for children 2

What do children say the most to parents?

1. "I'm just teasing you."

You may think , it’s not a big deal to make a joke with your child, and it can also cultivate his sense of humor. But have you ever thought about it, when you say to your child: "If you don't listen carefully to what mom says, I will glue your ears together next time." Have you ever thought about it, your child may really believe that you will do this? .

As a parent, your responsibility is to love and help your children, not to appear humorous and interesting with words that may seem humorous but are actually insults. Therefore, if you don’t mean something you say, it’s best not to say it.

2. "Why are you getting bigger and bigger..."

If a six-year-old child cries because he can't get what he wants, it's because he is only six years old; If a four-year-old has trouble staying quiet in his car seat, it's because he's only four.

Although we always hope that children can behave more mature and obedient, the thing is: children will always go through those years when they are stubborn, naughty, self-centered, hyperactive and other behaviors. This is their growth. required.

Many parents easily forget this fact because their children's "unruly" behavior always annoys them. However, when you say such words to your child, what you are expressing is empty blame and ignores the reason why the child behaves as he does.

When you yell at your child: "Why are you becoming more disobedient as you get older?", all you are paying attention to is your own feelings. We recommend that you learn more about your young child's feelings.

When you are tempted to blame him, please start with some more sympathetic sentences: "You look very angry." Or "I know you are unhappy, but things like this are bound to happen."

3. "Don't run, you will fall."

< p>Of course you mean well. As a mother, you always want to protect your children. However, we still want to say that warnings like this are more likely to cause children to suffer setbacks. Did you know that when you say this, you are actually sending this message to your child: you are sure that he will fall.

For a child who is striving to become independent, such information is undoubtedly a heavy blow. So, a better statement might be: "Be sure to tie your shoelaces before you go out to play." That way you're emphasizing the shoelaces, not your child's clumsiness.

Moreover, when your warnings do not come true time and time again (be careful, the juice will spill! You will break the cup!), your children will slowly start to accept your suggestions. Show disapproval because he thinks you are just talking casually.

4. "Why can't you be like XX?"

Such comparisons can only lead to one result: making your child feel like a second-class citizen, while also May lead to hatred and fighting among children.

If you want your child to always get red flowers like the kid next door, or to be as polite as your little cousin, this comparison method will never work. The only effect is to undermine the child's self-confidence.

Remember, the more you tell your child that he is not as good as others, the more he will believe that he is not good enough. Therefore, the wiser approach is to accept the child's strengths and weaknesses with tolerance, and then encourage him to grow happily in a direction that is most suitable for him.

In short, in order to allow children to grow normally, we not only need to take care of them physically, but also need to take care of their fragile psychology at all times.

In addition to ensuring the physical health of the child, we must also pay attention to the mental health of the child. Only when the body and mind are healthy can children be more sunny, which is beneficial to their work and family life as adults.