What kind of existence is an ex-girlfriend?

My ex-girlfriend is like a white moonlight.

As the sharp-tongued Zhang Ailing said, even if it is a white and red rose, after getting it, over time, it will be nothing more than rice sticks on the clothes and a smear of mosquito blood on the wall. What the man always thinks about is the white moonlight and the cinnabar mole on his heart. A lyric by Eason Chan has stung the hearts of many current incumbents: Those who cannot get it are always in turmoil, and those who are favored are confident.

In the hearts of some men, they have not completely let go of their previous relationship, and their ex-girlfriend is unfinished business. The reason for the initial separation may be due to objective reality, such as going their separate ways after graduation, or opposition from parents, or because they are young and energetic and do not know how to communicate and forgive, and do not know how to recover.

In short, even if it ended in a breakup, I still felt unwilling and reluctant to let go. So I would often dream back at midnight in the future, and I would always think of the early years we walked with her, the sad love songs we listened to together, the midnight movies we watched together, the smiles and gentle bows of her heads that made me miss her, "How much I want to I want to meet you and see how you have changed recently. I don’t talk about the past anymore. I just say hello to you. Just say, long time no see.” It is easy to forget things that have been completed and have achieved results, while things that have been interrupted, unfinished, and have not reached the goal are always fleeting. Topological psychologist Lewin also believes that humans have a natural tendency to complete a unit of behavior, such as answering a riddle, reading a book, etc. This is "psychological tension."

The psychological needs that are triggered but not satisfied form such a tension system, prompting individuals to take action to achieve their goals. So the unfinished work makes people miss it even more.

This kind of "unfinished complex" causes people to consciously and unconsciously seek compensation for not completing a certain task. The person involved develops a disconnected feeling, so he is always seeking to get double the benefits from it. satisfy.

It is not difficult to understand why men occasionally chat with their ex-girlfriends to see how she is doing recently, or secretly go to her QQ space to read her logs and then delete the traces, or otherwise send messages to both parties. A friend who was traveling with her asked her about her current situation in a roundabout way.

Especially when a man sees his radiant, gentle and beautiful ex-girlfriend, for a moment, he will have an idea, what if the person next to her is still me? Regarding unknown things, we often Make the mistake of thinking you can do better.

As everyone knows, if there is such a thing, the reason that made you break up in the first place may not be the reason, and now even if you get back together, you will still encounter other problems. Therefore, it is better to accept it peacefully. You are destined but not destined.