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What are the three things that parents must do to cultivate children who have their own opinions?
1, to cultivate children's listening ability from an early age. Listening ability affects children's learning and training ability. When children are young, the initial training is mainly based on listening methods, such as listening to teachers and parents telling stories. In addition, listening is conducive to the development of children's social media professional skills. Listening is an essential ability in interpersonal communication. In the process of communicating with others, the most worth learning is how to listen to each other.
Children with listening ability can also be independent. After listening, they don't necessarily need to accept it completely, and they don't necessarily need to listen completely. Instead, they react according to their own judgment. The ultimate goal of cultivating listening ability is to cultivate children's independence, learn to think when dealing with problems, and learn to be independent when dealing with daily life.
How to cultivate children's listening ability? Parents should first pay attention to their children's opinions and choices. Paying attention to children's opinions does not mean that they can do whatever they want. The basic principle is not to harm social development, not to harm yourself and others. For example, when buying clothes and snacks, they can make their own decisions. Some parents may think that their children are too young to know anything and how to match them. In fact, this is the main manifestation of not paying attention to your children. Parents are good at listening to their children's voices, and children also know how to listen to others with empathy.
2. To cultivate children's "independence", we need to respect the law of children's development. For example, some parents let their children take the train and cook alone very early in order to leave them alone. However, this practice is likely to endanger the safety of children's lives, which is contrary to the law of children's development. To cultivate children's independence, we need to go from shallow to deep. After watching TV, children aged 5-6 cook for their parents and asking children aged 8-9 to learn how to cook is really inappropriate.
Therefore, when parents ask their children to do something to cultivate independence, they must take into account their own situation, life cycle and ability to solve accidents. Instead of blindly pursuing perfect surface isolation.
3. Parents need to negotiate with their children from an early age and establish good behavior rules. Speaking of rules, many parents think that "rules" will destroy children's casual nature. But freedom is uncertain, and there is no certainty in this world. Everyone is under the control of rules every day, so should children.
"Rules" and "free development" are not contradictory, but closely related. The rule for children before the age of 3 should be to maintain their own safety, with the boundary of not hurting others and public property. In that way, children can play and explore under safe conditions, without causing harm to themselves and others, which is more conducive to their healthy and happy growth.
Establishing rules with children from an early age, children will be more clear about the boundaries between themselves and others when they grow up, which will give them a lot of sense of belonging and better release their nature. "Rules" are "self-cultivation", not suppressing children's nature. What parents need to do is to make a rule to explain and attach importance to their children, and to maintain their character and characteristics in the rules.
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