Dude, you have to hit the south wall more often.

When doing psychological counseling, you will meet two kinds of people: one is that you have an idea to come to a psychological counselor, but you don't know what to say. The purpose of such people's consultation is only to find more reasons for a given choice, and then to strengthen their choice. There is another kind of person who has no answer in his heart and doesn't know how to choose. He is more willing to see what is the best choice with the help of a counselor and choose it.

The problem is that too many people belong to the former and too few to the latter. Therefore, for a psychological counselor with insufficient skills, he is full of frustration when he meets the former.

For example, A asked me to consult the troubles encountered by civil servants. What's bothering you? I'm worried about whether to have myopia surgery or not, and that I'm not tall enough. At that time, A had just passed the written test and had not interviewed yet, which was far from the qualification examination and physical examination. I tried my best to calm A's anxiety, while A tried to reinforce her negative suggestion. So, at the end of the consultation, A still had a lot of troubles, and I could only sigh helplessly.

Looking at the back of A's departure, I suddenly remembered myself. When I graduated from college, I boasted that I was "not going to be a teacher". As a result, I was picked and picked. The good company didn't pick me, and I missed the opportunity of a good school. Finally, I became a people's teacher, and I stood on the platform for five years. In these five years, my biggest gain is that I understand that people always have to hit the south wall several times before they are willing. It always takes a few times to hit the south wall before you forget it. You always have to hit the south wall several times to know what suits you. Therefore, even before hitting the south wall, there will be a psychological counselor to help you analyze the pros and cons of various options, and you will still choose to hit your head. Playing once is not enough. It takes more time to hit it. The so-called youth and ignorance, that's all. Hit the south wall a few more times and you'll get old.

Know what? Know right and wrong, know advantages and disadvantages, know gains and losses, and know the weight. ...

So I let go. If you meet another tourist who is going to hit the south wall, even if you can't bear it, you will calmly watch him walk on the road to hit the south wall. Because I already know how strong such people are, and their thoughts and actions are forced to be consistent.

In the novel The End of Prayer, Wu Kui Toyo wrote such a heroine. Her name is Asaju Bomei, and her parents have been at odds since childhood. When I was in junior high school, my mother took all the money from home and left my father a debt. In desperation, the father has considered letting his daughter commit suicide. Ironically, fate arranged for Bomei to kill the man who tried to rape her by mistake and let his father take his place. After that, Bomei entered an orphanage and was lucky enough to get in touch with drama and become an actor and director. She met the right person, got married, got pregnant, but ended up with abortion and divorce. The play she directed has been staged in the famous grand theater for two months in a row, and it is full, but she is getting farther and farther away from happiness.

The Japanese will define such stories as "fetters", but I understand that living in Bomei can actually lead to happiness. However, she has made a choice in her mind, that is, it is impossible to get happiness, as the book says: "I have worked hard to get the conclusion that I should never seek the love of my family in my life." Bomei has received the supreme gift from his father, and further extravagance will only make the crime deeper. "

It is precisely because people in reality are the same as those in his works that Dongye Wu Kui's novels are well written. There is stubbornness, knot and unreasonable persistence. ...

So, is there no way not to hit the south wall?

Of course there is. But what if there is a way? How many people would rather abandon the method and choose to hit the south wall. As far as I know about B, B has always been troubled by being caught between the boss and the manager, not people around. But when I told B the solution, B was still struggling to be loyal to the boss or follow the manager.

Say the method first. After all, a few people still exist.

First, let me go. If you want to ask how to put it down, I can only answer that letting go of your hand means putting it down. Opening your heart means letting go. Looking at the long term means letting go. i still don’t get it. Forget it.

Secondly, analyze the advantages and disadvantages. Let yourself be a snob, make a list, add points and subtract points for each option, and work out the total score at a glance. If you insist that you can't do math, won't you ask a math expert for help?

Again, try the choice with the highest total score and adjust it at any time. Of course, if you are procrastinating, obese or lazy, please hit the south wall. I tried to get up early and run with that fat man. After running twice, the fat man couldn't get up, which almost made me give up running in the morning.