An interesting poem about drivers.

1. What are the classic jokes about drivers? 1 once the master asked me, miss, can you drive? I said no, it's hard to ask the master. It is not difficult for a master to pat the steering wheel. Tell him that if you hang a bone on the steering wheel, a dog can drive it!

It is said that drivers in Xi, Beijing and Shanghai will have different reactions after being caught by traffic police in violation of regulations: drivers in Xi generally have to argue with each other and get red in the face. The Shanghai driver admitted that he was unlucky. Drivers in Beijing have a good sense of humor. Generally, I beg for mercy and say, "Let me go as a fart, uncle, aunt and aunt of the police."

3. A passenger travels by taxi. On the way, he patted the driver on the shoulder and asked something. The driver screamed in horror. "Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't expect to scare you ... "The passenger said apologetically. "Never mind, a little misunderstanding." The driver replied, "I've been driving a hearse, but I changed to a taxi."

2. Poems praising drivers, whether in the early morning or at dusk,

Whether it's cold winter or hot summer,

It's dawn, and you've embarked on a journey.

Night arrival, you still haven't stopped.

You have skilled driving skills,

You have rich road experience,

You have a serious work attitude,

You have a strict work style.

You won the trust of customers,

Shouldering the responsibility and mission of ensuring commodity safety,

Adhering to the service tenet of "I will deliver the goods, I am the fastest",

Perfect completion of every transportation task.

Facing the monotonous highway,

Facing the bustling city,

No scenery of the past can make you slack off,

The security alarm went off,

While shouldering the great trust, it also attracts people's concern and gratitude.

Thank you for your dedication,

Thank you for your hard work,

Travel long distances, wind and rain,

You deserve the respect and respect of every employee.

3. Ask for a classic humorous sketch about the driver. The article "Driver who caused the accident" is the basis of a comedy sketch. The story happened before the traffic police, the driver and the woman on the street. It is based on life and shows the humorous elements in life.

People: traffic police, the driver who caused the accident, the driver's wife, the lady on the road. Scene: Traffic Police: "Stop the car!" "The driver and his wife were involved. Driver: "What's the matter?" The traffic police (with a painful expression) said, "Hey! Your wheel is pressing on my shoes. Fortunately, the shoes I wear today are bigger ... Driver: "Why are your shoes under my wheel?" Policeman: Hey, didn't you see the red light? Driver: "no, sorry, I saw the red light, but I didn't see you." "Traffic Police:" Why don't you use your seat belt? Driver: "used, otherwise so many bottles of wine would have been broken!" " "Traffic Police:" Another drunk driver. "

The driver tried to stand firm and said, "No, I didn't drink, just a little carsick." Traffic police: "Will the driver get carsick?" The driver then explained, "I just drank some beer."

The traffic police asked, "isn't beer wine?" The driver asked, "Is soy sauce also oil?" Traffic police: "Running a red light and drunk driving must be severely punished." The driver burped and said, "Penalty!" Three or five? "Traffic Police:" Please show me your driver's license. "

Driver: "I hope you police will discuss everything in the future, and don't always get upset, okay?" ! I just got my driver's license yesterday. Let me show it today! "Traffic Police:" driving without a license will be severely punished. This is a ticket. Please pay! "The driver knelt down and said," Uncle policeman, consider me a fart! " "The traffic police politely said to the driver with an alcohol tester,' Sir, please exhale into this funnel. "Driver:" Sorry, officer, I can't do this because I have severe asthma. Doing so will cause a severe cough, even my lungs will cough up! " "The driver refused.

The wife on the side said, "honey, I didn't know you had severe asthma." The driver glared at his wife when he heard it. Traffic police: "In that case, please come to my side. I have a finger blood test device in my car, just a drop of blood on your finger. "

The traffic police changed a trick. Driver: "sorry, officer, I can't have a blood test either, because I am a hemophiliac." If I do this, my blood will drip dry because it can't condense, so I will die of blood dryness! " "The driver made another excuse.

Traffic police: "well, we have to do a urine test." Please provide a urine sample with this small plastic bottle. " The traffic police did not give up at all.

Driver: "I'm very sorry, officer." I can't do that either. I have diabetes. The doctor said it would cause hypoglycemia and I would faint! " "The driver to push to take off again. The driver's wife said, "honey, I didn't know you had diabetes." The driver glared at his wife after hearing this.

Traffic police: "well, then come out in the most primitive way and walk along this white line." The traffic police looked very helpless.

Driver: "I'm really sorry, officer, I can't do it." I can't do this because I, this ... "The driver tried to find a reasonable excuse in his sleepy mind. Traffic police "Why not? ! "Asked the traffic police.

Driver: "because I, I, I am so drunk that I can't even walk steadily, sir, I will fall!" " "The driver said. Traffic police: "Why didn't you stop immediately when you ran a red light just now? The driver looked at the red light in surprise, then at the traffic police, and argued loudly, "Your red light is above and my car is below. How can we meet? "Traffic Police:" Let me ask you, what should I do when I meet the green light? " Driver: "Breakthrough.

Traffic police: "What should I do if I encounter a red light?" Driver: "Stop." Traffic police: "What about the yellow light?" Driver: "Fight him!" Traffic police: "You saw a chicken, a dog and a man. What did you run over?" Driver: "Of course!" The driver replied.

Traffic police shake their heads! Driver's wife: "Run over the dog!" The traffic police still shook their heads! The driver was unconvinced: "If you don't run over the dog, do you want me to run over someone?" Traffic police: "No, you should brake!" " "The traffic police said," you said you just drank some beer, and now you almost had an accident. What lessons should be learned? " Driver: "It seems that I have to practice more in the future. If only I had a dozen drinks. On the way, the lady stood in the middle of a busy road and shouted, "Hello, officer, how can I get to the hospital?" "Traffic Police:" If you stand a little longer, someone will take you to the hospital. "

Lady: "Mr. policeman, a car just hit me and ran away!" " "The traffic police said," you said a car hit you and ran away? Did you see the car number of that car? "Lady:" I didn't see it clearly. " Traffic police: "What brand? "Lady:" I didn't see it clearly, "policeman:" What color? " .

4. What are the poems praising the driver? 1. You are the angels in white of automobiles, and it is your bounden duty to rejuvenate yourself.

2. Dirt yourself and be happy with others.

3. A dynamic vehicle is entrusted with your tenderness.

4. strive for perfection, race against time,

5. So that the vehicle can drive safely.

6. Think what people think and be anxious.

I often forget myself in my mind.

8. Your efforts are close at hand.

9. Your efforts have cheered thousands of families;

10. Your sweat makes your dream come true;

1 1. Your true feelings are exchanged for sleeping lions.

12. You are so ordinary, you are so simple.

5. What poems describe the driver? There are few poems describing "drivers", only "Tianjingsha Qiu Si", the original text is as follows:

Tianjin Sha Qiu Si

Yuan Dynasty: Ma Zhiyuan

Dead vines, old trees, faint crows,

Small bridges and flowing water,

The ancient road and the west wind are thin.

The sun went down,

Heartbroken people are at the end of the world.

Translation:

At dusk, a group of crows landed on an old tree with withered vines and made a piercing cry.

Under the small bridge, the running water jingles, and the farmhouse next to the small bridge raises smoke.

On the ancient road, a thin horse struggled against the west wind.

The sunset gradually lost its luster and set from the west.

On a cold night, only lonely travelers wander in the distance.

Brief introduction of poet

Ma Zhiyuan (about 1250- 132 1 to 1324) is called Dongli (it is said that the word is far-reaching, and later called "Dongli"). Han nationality, mostly from (present-day Beijing), said another (Ma Zhiyuan is from Macitang Village, Dongguang County, Hebei Province, whose real name is Dongli, to show Tao Yuanming's ambition). His age was later than Guan Hanqing and Bai Pu, and his birth year was before Zhiyuan (starting at 1264). His death year was between Zhi Zhi and Taiding's first year (132 1- 1324), and he was called "the four masters of Yuanqu" with Guan Hanqing, Zheng Guangzu and Bai Pu. He is a famous writer in the famous Liyuan and an important figure in the Yuan Dynasty. He is known as the "four masters of the Yuan Dynasty". He is known as the "champion of Qu" and enjoys a high reputation in the literary history of the Yuan Dynasty.

6. Humorous sentences describing traffic jams 1. The wide and open road became crowded for a while.

2, the car is crowded into a knot in one's heart, the drivers are fidgeting and the horn is ringing.

Most of them are middle-aged women. They looked at the mobile phone time over and over again, and kept looking at the front of the car, as if their hearts were screened by machine guns. The mobile phone in my hand is not idle for a moment, constantly exaggerating the vastness of traffic jams to friends or leaders.

4, another landscape of traffic jams, couples have nothing urgent anyway, so use this time to talk about love with the environment.

5. when can this be moved to the place slowly ~

6, I have practiced, the car is blocked, and the mood is not blocked!

7. What sentences describe the driver? 1. The driver held the steering wheel and drove carefully. lady

Please tell the driver to wait for me at the gate of the meeting.

Third, the literary programs played on the radio can help the driver's uncle relax his loneliness during the journey.

Fourth, Uncle Du skillfully operated the crane to pull the boulder off the ground.

5. An old man fell on the road. Fortunately, the driver was quick-witted and avoided an accident.

Six, illegal vehicles were stopped by the traffic police, the driver was punished.

Seventh, drivers are quick in hand and quick in eye, and brake in time to avoid accidents.

Uncle Zhang, the driver, always polishes his car.

After a while, the fault of this car was eliminated by the driver's uncle. broadsword

The traffic police punished the driver for driving illegally, and the onlookers dispersed.

Eleven, the driver uncle firmly grasp the steering wheel, driving a version of the truck on the highway.

In order to help the compatriots in the disaster area get rescue in time, the driver's uncle worked day and night.

The traffic accident was caused by the driver's drunk driving.

Recently, my father hired a new driver in his factory.

At dawn, the driver started the car.

8. What poems describe "old drivers"? I smelled a faint breath as soon as I opened the door! As soon as my left foot got into the car, I heard the voice of "Welcome the most handsome man in the world ~ ~ ~" in the car for a long time. It turned out that Tuji had been waiting for me for a long time. He knelt on the ground humbly, with a face of piety and worship. I calmly kicked the rabbit in front of me and looked at him critically. He buried his head and dared not look at me.

I sat in my seat and started driving. The envious eyes of the rabbit were behind me. I drove so fast and turned so hard that the rabbit foamed with fear and fainted to the ground. He can't believe I'm so powerful.

After parking, I kicked Tuji, who was still unconscious in the car, shook my sleeves and strode out the door. Tuji excited roar came from the car. I smiled. I know he is licking my used steering wheel because it smells like a strong man.

The word "old driver" comes from Yunnan folk song "Old driver takes me".

It is not an ordinary folk song, but a magical, evil, shocking and classic Yunnan folk song. Once published, it was well received by the audience and won the reputation of "King of Hundred Songs" and "Father of Divine Comedy".

The word "old driver" is also widely spread with the fire of songs.

extensive use

Old drivers and friends who have heard Yunnan folk songs know that this song itself has an indescribable dirty feeling. Therefore, the word "old driver" will always be associated with people when it first appears. In addition, most of the network resources in the hands of very few people are dirty resources.

Therefore, even if the meaning of "old driver" has now extended to various cultural and even scientific fields, it is still difficult to get rid of a dirty connotation.

Due to the wide spread and universal applicability of the word "old driver", an old driver culture has gradually evolved in the network world. Under the influence of this culture, some jargon that only insiders can understand has gradually emerged.

Key words:

The old driver took me: popularizing knowledge and developing resources.

There is no time to explain, get on the bus quickly: since you sincerely ask me for advice, I will be merciful to teach you knowledge and resources!

Old drivers should start/drive: old drivers should invest resources.

Lexical features

The resources of old drivers are absolutely large.

I am willing to share my resources with you.

Read more resources, can quickly identify information, and collect and share information.

The category of collection resources is special and unique.

There are special resources to find channels, it is easy to find rare resources, and often share them in time.

It means that you are good at something or familiar with something and can give guidance to new people.