Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - The story of Zhang Fei, the third brother of Taoyuan Sanjieyi
The story of Zhang Fei, the third brother of Taoyuan Sanjieyi
Guan Gong is at the tofu seller's house. He had a long-term success and soon grew up. The tofu seller asked him to help sell tofu. Guan Gong is too powerful. He thinks the tofu shelf is too light. He said, "Dad, you have to build an iron shelf and an iron rod to stand up to my choice!" " "
"ok." Tofu guy immediately agreed.
Duke Guan provoked the burden of tofu and ran to Zhang Fei's door. Zhang Fei sells meat at home, and the meat table is iron. There is a golden signboard on the top of the door: "Whoever handles the meat case will cut three pounds of meat for free." Guan Yu thought, "What's the point of this meat case? Let me do it! " He put tofu on his shoulders, rolled up his sleeves, put his hands on the meat table, raised his head, and then slammed it on the ground. Then he chopped three Jin of meat and threw it at the bean curd residue, picked it up and ran away. When Zhang Fei's wife saw it, she was too scared to move in the room.
Zhang Fei came home and asked the woman, "Who has come to my house?" The woman said, "It's a tofu seller, big red face." I said it again in detail.
"How long have you been gone?"
"Wait a minute."
"ah! Let me chase! "
When he saw Guan Gong shopping in the grocery store, he went up and said, "You handled my meat case?"
"What does your sign say: Who will move the meat table and cut three catties of meat for free? I cut three pounds of meat, you weigh it! "
"You have to wait for me, too."
"Hey? How to cut the meat until you come back? I have no time to wait! "
Two people talk about it. If there is a fire, they can't bear it and will fight. Guan Gong said, "If you want to make a phone call, go to the street and don't interfere with other people's shops."
As soon as these two people go to the streets, they will behave themselves! Zhang Fei was carrying an axe and an iron shoulder pole. The noise was so loud that even the green flag in the street was trampled.
At this moment, Liu Beizheng with seven sandals is sitting in the teahouse drinking tea and playing tricks. Someone asked him, "Why did you bring seven sandals?"
"Oh, which one is less than a good match? Hey, there is a fight in the street, why don't you pull it? "
Someone said, "Who dares to pull? The two men fought, and even the bluestone tablets in the street were crushed. "
Liu Bei went and stood between them: "Stop fighting, both of you. Tell me about it. "
Two people just said it again. Liu Bei said, "Guys, stop fighting. Is it not good for the three of us to become brothers? "
"okay! Where are we going to worship? "
Zhang Fei said, "Come and worship in my back garden."
Three people invited incense, bought a pig's head, invited a piece of bodhisattva paper and an ingot, knelt in the garden and swore that they would be half-hearted in the future. On second thought, which is the elder brother and which is the younger brother?
Zhang Fei said, "We climb peach trees. My brother climbs fast and my brother climbs slowly. " Just then, although he was climbing, he climbed to the top of the tree. Guan Gong is very slow. He is the second child. As for Liu Bei, he didn't climb, so he took a chair and sat under the tree.
Zhang Fei said; "I am my brother."
Liu Bei said, "Are you a brother? I am a brother! I ask you: Where did this tree grow, from the roots up, or from the top into the mud? "
Zhang Fei couldn't beat him, so he had to say, "All right, I'll be the third. Since we have become sworn brothers, we will get together to drink every day! "
"Not bad, just come to eat wine every day."
This Liu Bei is a heavy drinker and eats every day. He got up and ran as soon as he ate his beard. Zhang Fei thought to himself, "It's no use eating every day. My butcher shop will suffer from your poverty." He quietly said to Guan Gong, "We will go to the river boat tomorrow to drink wine from the Ming Dynasty."
The next day, Liu Bei looked for them, but he couldn't find them. We had a good talk yesterday, he thought. Where did they go today? Let me cross the river to find it. He jumped on the ferry and a strange wind blew it into the middle of the river, next to their boat! "
"Oh, you two are not ugly, and you are still hiding here to eat."
"Oh, eldest brother, you are here! Sit down and have a drink together! "
After drinking the wine, Zhang Fei quietly said to Guan Gong, "This is no good. We can't escape. We must find a way to kill him. There is a dry well in my backyard. We laid a reed leaf on the well, put a chair on the reed leaf, and asked him to sit down and drink. When he gets to the first seat, he will fall into the well, and then pick up a basket of stones, sand and mud to cover it, and he will be fine. " After the two discussed it, Zhang Fei said to Liu Bei, "I will come to my back garden to drink in the Ming Dynasty."
"ok."
The next day, three people have been to the backyard, tables and chairs are ready-made. Zhang Fei said, "Brother, please sit facing south. I'll pour the wine. " "
Liu Bei said, "All right." Everyone will eat slowly. When Liu Bei was drunk, he fell asleep on the table. Zhang Fei and Guan Yu secretly said, "Strange! It's just a reed leaf with a recliner on it. Why didn't he fall into the well at this time? "
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