Classic humorous chat sentences

In our daily study, work or life, we all know some classic sentences, which can be divided into declarative sentences, interrogative sentences, imperative sentences and exclamatory sentences according to different moods. So what types of sentences are there? The following are the classic humorous chat sentences I compiled for you, hoping to help you.

1. Don't call me if you have nothing to do, and don't call me if you have anything to do.

2. How to lose weight if you are not full?

You are from Yuanmou, Yunnan, and I am from Zhoukou, Beijing. Let me hold your hairy hand! Love! Let's walk upright!

4, the effect of contraception: unsuccessful, adult.

Wear other people's shoes, go your own way and let them take a taxi to find it.

6. Are you tired? Just tired. Comfort is for the dead.

7. Late at night, Boeing pilots came home and knocked at the door. The wife asked: Who? The pilot said humorously, request landing! Suddenly a man in the room shouted: Roger that, take off immediately and make room for you!

8, play hey, think about it, take a small picture.

9. You are really creative and have the courage to live!

10, even believe in advertisements, are you stupid to study?

1 1, not afraid of being used, but afraid that you are useless.

12, counting sheep until the mouth cramps, and the nightmare really wakes up naturally.

13, happiness is a comparative level, and something can only be felt at the bottom.

14. My name in my girlfriend's mobile phone is "He". After breaking up, I became "it".

15, take the newspaper to the toilet, I am a scholar.

16, can two people with type B blood produce type B?

17. Without toads, swans would be lonely.

18, if I burn incense for one year to meet you, incense for three years to know you, and incense for ten years to cherish you, I am willing to convert to Catholicism for the happiness of my next life.

19, if a drop of water falls from the sky, it is a tear I miss you; If two drops of water fall from the sky, it is that I love you and am ecstatic; If there are countless water drops in the sky, don't think about it, it's raining!

20, riding a white horse is not necessarily a prince, he may be a Tang priest; The one with wings is not necessarily an angel, he may be a bird man.

2 1, in addition to love, there are radishes in other people's fields.

22, exercise muscles to prevent being beaten!

There are many ways to destroy friendship, and the most thorough way is to borrow money.

24. A knowledgeable person is exquisite in all directions, a knowledgeable person is wise to protect himself, and a knowledgeable person is bleak all his life.

25, a man when he doesn't belong to you, let you sigh what is perfect, when he belongs to you, let you sigh what is true.

26, it was still very easy to mix in ancient times. Cut it and you can be a civil servant.

27. After studying for more than ten years, I think it is better to mix kindergartens!

28. Close my eyes and I see my future.

29. When they are in love, they promise to get married again in their next life. After marriage, they often suspect that destiny takes a hand's love was made in a previous life.

30, since I got mental illness, my spirit is much better!

3 1, women chasing men, laminated yarn. Men chase women, mezzanine mom.

32. The early bird catches the worm, and the early worm is eaten by the bird!

33. The highest state of shameless people is that they are completely unaware of their shameless.

34. If you listen to sweet words, you will get diabetes.

You can live like a pig, but you can never be as happy as a pig.

36, the sea is wide with diving, and the drums are broken.

37. Do you know why we are predestined friends? We knew each other as early as 1000 years ago. It was autumn, and you ran with me in the wind, leaving your teeth marks on me. This has become an eternal story. At that time, my name was Lv Dongbin.

38. Behind a successful man, there is always a woman, and behind a rich woman, there is always a group of men.

39. When the road is rough, shout and move on.

I won't tell you if I kill you.

4 1, I eat and lose weight every day, and you say I have no perseverance?

42, water does not taste the depth, people do not know how good.

43. You are a well, you are both!

44. The teacher is ruthless and I have feelings.

45. Buying a computer without broadband is like being a monk without eating.

46. The old ladies on Naihe Bridge have sold Pepsi. How can I forget you?

47, vulnerabilities and patches Qi Fei, blue screen * * * crash color!

48. The milkman is healthier than the milkman.

49. Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it.

Boss, is money really that important to you? You talked for more than three hours and didn't leave a penny behind?

5 1, format yourself just to delete you!

52. My life is not decided by heaven, and heaven will destroy me.

53, unreasonable, there must be a plan.

54. To tell the truth, all are black and blue. Those liars were covered up before the resumption.

55. Women's clothes are called capital, and men's clothes are called perverts.

If I were a fox and you were a hunter, would you chase me? If I were tea and you were boiling water, would you soak me? If I were a car and you were a driver, would you drive me? If you are money and I am a passbook, I will definitely take yours.

57. Men's outlook on development: play with beautiful women, associate with rich women, show love to powerful women, talk to smart women, cooperate with successful women, sleep with healthy women and marry ordinary women.

If the smoke is not obedient, I will "smoke".

59. Your future depends on your dreams now, so go to sleep!

60. People are not smart, but dare to be bald like others?

6 1. What are you doing up so early? The nightclub hasn't opened yet!

62. Water can carry a boat and cook porridge.

63. A person is a stranger in a foreign land, and he is homesick every time he works overtime.

64. Don't look for me if you have nothing to do, and don't look for me if you have anything to do!

65. Whether you are stupid or not depends mainly on whether you will be stupid.

66. Men spend money to make women happy and women spend money because men make them unhappy.

67. It's not who can't live without who, but who can't let go of who.

68. Women's outlook on development: play with handsome men, have sex with generous men, chat with talented men, flirt with rich men, please powerful men, sleep with romantic men and marry honest men.

69. Not afraid of enemies like tigers, but teammates like pigs.

70. I can't help myself. Besides teeth, there is love!

7 1. Missing after breaking up is not missing, but being mean.

72. The best years in my life are these years. I can't find anyone to spend money on me. Can't I spend my own money?

73. As long as you dare to die, I dare to bury it!

74. A bean fell. It's discouraging and frustrating. This bean is me. What can encourage it to stand up? The answer is you! Because there is something called "pigs encourage beans".

75, social cable, brothers have seed. But I'm not your date.

God, my clothes have lost weight again!

77. Advertising is telling others that money can be spent in this way.

78. When I am drunk, I refuse to obey anyone. I only hold the wall.

79. I don't wash my heart very much. I wash my feet all over the street. Virtue is rare, and beauty is everywhere.

80, wearing Prada's devil wears Prada, life is "lifelike". Walking dead, the living live "vividly".

8 1. If you look up often, you will grow taller. If you always pick up bargains with your head down, you will bow down.

82. No one has blown cowhide so fresh and refined for a long time!

83. The most romantic thing I can think of is that you are getting older day by day while I am still young.

84. Don't panic when you meet a dog on the road. Fight bravely. There will be at most three results: first, you win, you are better than the dog; Second, if you lose, you are even worse than a dog; Third, you are even. You are like a dog.

85. Life is simple. Live, relax. Life is not easy.

86. Life is short because it is forgotten when you are alive and suddenly realized when you are dead.

87, a small watch with a big gold chain, three small barbecues a day.

88. The role of power is mutual, except the power of love.

89. For the rich, everything is fine if it ends well.

90. It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. In retrospect, this thousand-handed Guanyin has been streaking for many years!

9 1, my god, did you let summer and winter share a room? This kind of weather!

92. No matter how bad the mud is, as long as it turns to the wall, something can always stick.

93. It doesn't matter if your head is empty. The key is not to get into the water.

94. Watch yourself go through ups and downs and watch your friends go through ups and downs.

When I woke up, it was already dark.

96. When I was dizzy, I finally understood what love was.

In the middle of the night, George W. Bush saw bin Laden standing in front of his bed, criticizing his head and distributing it. Bush was startled and said, How dare you break into the White House at night! Bin Laden shook his chest-long beard and said with a gloomy smile, it's so soft and confident!

98. Actually, I am a genius, but unfortunately I am jealous of talents!

99. If I don't hit you, you won't know that I am both civil and military.

100, close your eyes, I see my future.

10 1. According to the aesthetics of pigs, I am basically a handsome guy.

102, I am not a casual person, I am not a casual person.

103, sleep is an art-no one can stop me from pursuing art.

104, don't swear to me, I'm afraid you will be struck by lightning.

105, women are trouble, men like to ask for trouble.

106, as long as the hoe jumps well, how can a corner be dug down?

107, praising cows because they care about milk. Praise the sheep because of the aftertaste of mutton.

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