Two difficult years after the operation.

In May, all the Sophora japonica flowers fell, and another summer arrived. Unconsciously, my radical tumor surgery has passed the second anniversary.

These two years have experienced the pain of surgery and the side effects of cancer treatment.

Two years after operation, one and a half years of chemotherapy and nearly one year of targeted therapy. I have suffered a lot, and I don't know how I got through it.

In retrospect, those painful feelings are still there, and their struggle is still vivid. People who have experienced pain don't want to talk about it again, because the past is unbearable.

A serious illness struck, such as a landslide. After a few months, I became weak and exhausted. I couldn't lift a bucket of oil or do small things. After a short walk, I was panting and could do nothing. ...

I thought I was finished. I confessed.

Surrender! I heard that tumor jun got carried away.

Never.

I am still strong-willed, not scared, not crushed.

Unable to be overwhelmed by the disease, I chose to take the initiative, do what I can in treatment, and strive to do everything well.

Do things seriously, don't think about whether you can achieve any effect, just do it.

Listen to the doctor's advice, standardize treatment, review regularly, take medicine on time, exercise actively, live a regular life (such as going to bed early and getting up early, controlling diet), and do something interesting to enrich yourself. This is my daily portrayal for two years.

As a terminal cancer patient, I dare not plan for tomorrow, but I can live every day in front of me and every day within my power.

In this way, day after day.

Last August, with the cessation of chemotherapy, my body slowly recovered and became stronger day by day. The speed of recovery is very slow, and the illness is like a dizzy spell. So far, the physical quality is not as good as a normal person, but it is always changing in a good direction. Compared with my physical condition during chemotherapy, I am completely different.

I have advanced intestinal cancer, liver metastasis and serious condition. After half a year of chemotherapy, my physical indicators have returned to normal, but the doctor still doesn't trust me and let me have another year of chemotherapy.

Now that chemotherapy has stopped, it is really a question whether there are still cancer cells in the body that have not been killed and whether the physical condition can continue to be normal.

Because cancer is too complicated, sometimes the recurrence of many cancer patients after operation is unclear, especially within two years after operation, which is a high incidence period.

So according to my condition, the doctor told me to go to the hospital for a comprehensive review every two or three months after operation, which lasted for five years.

Is there any trouble?

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But as long as you can ensure that your body is fine, then the trouble is worth it.

I used to be too afraid to go to the hospital, too troublesome, and a minor illness dragged into a serious illness.

Let's not mention those painful things here, but let's talk about post-operative review.

My initial physical examination, which lasted nearly a year, has been in the hospital.

In-hospital reexamination has many advantages. Obviously, it is convenient and the patient is not tired.

On the day of the review, the hospital will call you, and you can go through the formalities and live in the ward. Then you don't care about anything. The hospital will make an appointment for you. Patients don't have to get up early and be greedy for the dark, as long as they do all kinds of tests according to the arrangement and requirements.

The examination results of hospitalized patients will come out soon, and we will know the examination situation on the same day. The doctor in charge will immediately communicate with the patient, inform the examination results, prescribe future treatment plans and precautions, and determine the date of the next review.

But everything has two sides, both advantages and disadvantages. The disadvantage is that patients can never get rid of their mentality. People are strange. Once they put on the hospital gown, they are not sick. They think they are patients. They always seem to have problems.

This is especially true for me, because I am often hospitalized, and I can't get rid of the patient's mentality.

Then everything suddenly changed.

At the beginning of 2020, due to the body's intolerance to targeted drugs, the use was stopped. No targeted drugs, no infusion, no hospitalization. That year, when COVID-19 was raging, hospitalization became extremely difficult and complicated.

I won't go to the hospital without infusion. Anyway, the re-examination can be done in the outpatient clinic.

Since then, my reexamination has been carried out in the outpatient department.

If you are not hospitalized, your mentality will be much easier and your mentality will gradually become normal.

With the normal results of reexamination again and again, I gradually got rid of my patient status and pretended to be a normal person.

But it's very tiring to go to the clinic for examination by yourself. A comprehensive physical examination involves many items and procedures. You have to go back and forth to the hospital many times. First of all, you have to register, make a list, then make an appointment for inspection, and then complete all kinds of inspections according to the agreement, and the results are slow. There is still a waiting period. You have to consult an expert when you get the inspection report.

Because the recurrence or metastasis of cancer after operation is a matter that every cancer patient is very worried about, I have become a little sensitive and a little uncomfortable, so I am suspicious and prone to paranoia. Is it a recurrence?

Every time I arrive at the date of regular review, I feel particularly uneasy and anxious, especially when waiting for the results of the inspection, just like a suspect waiting for a verdict, for fear of waiting for bad news.

In the past, my body was stronger and my personality was more extensive. I didn't take my physical pain seriously because I was still young. I didn't expect any serious problems. Who knows, I suddenly fell into a big pit and got a terminal illness.

In this way, I have to be hehe to myself.

Fortunately, I have received many years of formal scientific education and rational thinking. No matter how messy things are, I will sort things out slowly and always find a solution to the problem.

It's not easy to stumble these two years.

In medicine, five years after surgery is regarded as a criterion for cancer patients, and no recurrence after five years after surgery is called clinical cure.

I am two years old now.

Next goal, three years.

Then there is another target. ...

One by one.