How difficult is it to change to a city life?

I recently moved to another city due to work reasons, which is about 50 minutes’ drive from Changsha. I go back to the provincial capital every Friday to feel the mellowness of the hazy city, and then go to the countryside on Sunday evening to experience the cleanliness of the back garden. And cool.

When we graduated from college, everyone was looking for jobs. Some students went to other places, and some returned to the county. Like most people, I stayed in Fuzhou.

The biggest reason why I didn’t leave Fuzhou was because I couldn’t bear to leave those classmates. I felt that not staying in the same place would be disrespectful. Everyone is here, why do you go to other places?

Although these classmates did not really care about my existence, I gradually discovered that people who should go away would still go away quietly, and would not be reluctant to leave because of me.

They will leave because of work, love, marriage, any reason can lead them to leave, but they will not stay because of me.

There is really no one who can be by your side. Either people betray you, or you betray others.

When I decided to come to Changsha, I also asked myself a few tacky questions. What should I do if I become a wild dog in a strange city without family or friends? Mr. Tang asked me, Zhang Xiaoben, what would you do if you were dumped while you were in love in Changsha? You would be very pitiful.

Bah.

Let’s talk about a few things that everyone is afraid of.

The first thing is to find a job. When you arrive in a new city, you have no connections, no friends to help recommend, and you lose all your resources, so you have to start from scratch.

Wrong. As long as you are not a novice in the workplace, changing your job in another city means just changing to another company and continuing to start, not starting from scratch. It turns out that if you become a department manager, you can only start as a specialist in another city. That's obviously not the case.

Speaking of which, I am really lucky. Before I came to Changsha, I had received an offer from a Fortune 500 company. The position was not high and the salary was average, but first of all, I solved the first problem that everyone is afraid of when living in a different place. One thing, survival.

People who are afraid of not being able to find a job are actually not worried about whether they can find a job, but whether the job they find can satisfy their expectations to the greatest extent. If it does not greatly exceed expectations, it will appear that It's not that face-saving, that's all.

After all, everyone feels that arriving in a strange city seems like a huge price to pay. How many valuable things have you created for yourself in your original city?

The second thing is loneliness, no friends, and when you want to scold your ex and boss, you can’t find anyone.

Well, there is a solution to this matter. The circle of friends is gradually accumulated. In the circle of life, not everyone can be called a friend. Instead, there are many connections that cannot be refused due to human relationships, occupying unnecessary space.

Therefore, in the new life circle, you have the absolute initiative to manage your circle of friends, interact with the people you like, keep a distance from the people you don’t appreciate, and give yourself a piece of pure land.

Now is the Internet age. We miss our old friends. We can call, send WeChat, or video chat at any time. Physical distance can no longer prevent us from happily gossiping with the whole world.

Loneliness comes from the lack of some of your abilities, and the helplessness it brings does not come from having more or less friends.

The third thing is not having a sense of security. What to do if something goes wrong.

What should I do if I am sick and have no one to take care of me? So I want to practice the waistcoat line! Your body is your own, and no one has the obligation to take care of you every day. Even the best friends don’t want to buy you porridge and water every day.

What should you do if your car breaks down on the road and someone hits you? If you encounter a male driver who is aggressive, what should you do? This kind of thing happens everywhere, and it doesn't matter which city you are in. The best solution you can do is to take pictures, call the police, and wait for insurance.

Don’t think about what you will do if no one supports you or what you will do if no one stands up for you. If you are really capable, why do you need others to help you like this? If you are really capable, If you don’t have the ability, and no one will come to support you and stand up for you, if you don’t believe me, why don’t you go back to your original city and give it a try?

What should you do if you are dumped in a relationship? I personally think, let’s talk about another one.

The fourth thing is that being too far away from your parents is unfilial.

This is what Little A told me. My parents are here and I won’t travel far away. But she hid the last sentence, there must be a way to travel.

This is what Confucius said. In Confucius’ time, people used their feet to measure the world. At most, they could use wooden wheels to measure the world. It took several years to go out. He left home when he was a teenager, and when he was middle-aged, he left home. When you come back, you don’t have an ID card or anything, and your mother won’t even dare to recognize you.

Nowadays, transportation is convenient. From Changsha to Fuzhou, it only takes a few hours. If you live in Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou, the time it takes to travel from the south of the city to the north of the city is enough for me to fly from central China to east China.

When I was in Fuzhou, I couldn’t go back home twice a year. After coming to Changsha, I can go home three times a year. Tell me, where would it be better for me to stay?

The matter of filial piety or not is a bit sensitive. Anyone who is accused of being unfilial will get angry with you. Everyone should have their own life. Some people immigrate abroad and their parents live in China. Isn't that extremely unfilial?

The best parents love each other, live actively, and create a loving living environment for their children. Therefore, I think the most filial way is to take good care of yourself, live a decent life independently, and let your parents see what they want to see in you.

I don’t know where the confidence comes from. Anyway, when I left Fuzhou, I didn’t feel sad or have any special emotions.

I am so confident in myself, is there any place in this world that I can’t survive in? I am so talented! I will definitely become a blade of grass on Malan Mountain. . .

Later, I heard from a friend that Little A regretted not treating me well and not letting me feel the warmth of friendship for so many years, which made me leave Fuzhou without the slightest reluctance. She said He wanted to be nicer to me in the future, and then he gave me two badminton rackets.

Since I was given two, I didn’t think much about it. If it was three, I would have understood it to mean that when you go out alone, don’t forget to have sex frequently.

Everywhere except home is far away.

Everywhere except the placenta is a foreign place.

It’s really not a big deal to work and live in another city. At least, I enjoy it.

You are welcome.