He raises you as his daughter. Is this really the best form of love?

(1)

"If a man loves you, he will raise you as his daughter. You have to find such a person to get married."

This sentence The words captured the hearts of countless girls.

You don’t have to think twice when you go out with him. He is a living nanny. He will take care of you like a three-year-old daughter. He will give you meat when you eat hot pot and give you when you sweat. Hand him a tissue. No matter what you say or what you don't say, he will understand. Moreover, it will give you a surprise when you are not paying attention.

Before marriage, he raised you as his daughter. You didn’t have to worry about anything, just be as happy as an idiot. After you get married, you have your own children, the plot changes, and you find that you can't handle it at all.

One day, your husband is on a business trip and your child has a severe fever in the middle of the night. You call him. But he was far away in another city and couldn't fly back even if he spread his wings. At this time, you realize that you, who was raised as a "daughter", don't know how to get to the nearest hospital, which department to go to, or how to deal with emergencies for your child. You are so incompetent because of your love. Even if he shows it to the best of his ability, it doesn't matter, but how do you face the child's gaze?

A primary school student wrote in the essay "My mother is a useless middle-aged woman": She can't do anything well, the food she cooks is super unpalatable, the house is a mess, and everything is unclean . She doesn't know how to play all day long, but she still complains about being tired every day, saying it's all because of me, and she's almost exhausted. Among the classmates I play with, Xiaoqing’s mother can drive, but she can’t, Xiaolin’s mother can play table tennis with Xiaolin, but she can’t, Xiaoyu’s mother can draw, and Yaoyao’s mother can make beautiful clothes. Looks good. I'm so jealous, but she can't do anything.

You can be a daughter in the eyes of your husband with peace of mind, but you may also be a useless mother in the eyes of your daughter. This is a thorn in your heart that you cannot remove no matter what.

(2)

Let us think about this question, is there such a kind of man who can raise his girlfriend/wife as a daughter?

Let’s make a hypothesis:

The first hypothesis: There is no such man in the world. Well, the conditions for dreaming do not exist. It’s time to wake up from the dream and face reality.

The second hypothesis: There are such men in the world.

A. There is such a man in the world, but you meet him, and you like each other.

He holds you in his hands for fear of falling, and holds you in his mouth for fear of melting. He treats you like a daughter.

He has a deceitful demeanor, a gentle man, a gentle man, and a compassionate man. For such a good man, even if he doesn't cheat on himself, can he guarantee that others won't poach him? At that time, what did you use to fight against others?

And since he can be so kind to you, why can't he be so kind to others.

His favor is not the reason for your fall. Only by constantly increasing your bargaining chips will you be able to move with ease in love, and you will be able to cover up the water with the help of soldiers.

B. There are such good men in the world, but they don’t look down on you at all. They are looking for someone who is evenly matched, fair-skinned, beautiful, with good EQ and IQ, who can help him. woman. The plot of the domineering president liking silly girls can only appear in TV series, and the story of the prince and Cinderella has never appeared in reality.

Therefore, meeting a good man who treats you like a daughter and treats you wholeheartedly is not only an extremely small probability event, but also does not guarantee that it will happen once and for all.

(3)

What is the best love? Everyone has their own answer.

I think it should be: two people of equal strength, supporting each other, making each other better, just like Qian Zhongshu and Yang Jiang, just like Sima Xiangru and Zhuo Wenjun, just like Chiang Kai-shek and Soong Meiling.

He has his career and you have your life. They do not interfere with each other and rely on each other.

When he is tired, you can give her a shoulder; when you are tired, you can nestle in his arms.

You are not his daughter, and he is not your father. You are husband and wife, and you are running your marriage and life together, just like a pair of partners running a company. You will have children in the future, and you will work together to take care of a new life.

Although fathers are now more and more involved in the growth of their children, in the six months to one year before the child is weaned, in most cases it is the mother who is most involved. At that time, how could you, who were used to being given and cared for, take care of your children? How could you assume the role of mother?

Yang Lan once said: Find a husband who can help you realize your dreams.

The same applies in reverse, find a wife who will help you realize your dreams. After being married for more than 20 years, Yang Lan and Wu Zheng not only gave birth to a son and a daughter, but they also helped each other, their careers continued to rise, and their lives were enviable to others.

I have a friend whose husband doted on her so much before marriage that she didn’t have to do anything. However, after giving birth to a child, her husband was busy with work and could not take care of the family, so she had to shoulder the burden of taking care of the children and housework. At first, she was used to being taken care of, and she complained all day long about the hardships of life and her husband's incomprehension. Later, she thought that she had become a mother and could no longer be as willful as before. So while tidying up the house, I raised my baby to be smart and smart. When I have free time, I can still write and draw. I plan to wait for my baby to go to kindergarten before I can find a job again. Her husband also saw the changes in her and was very supportive of him, and their relationship became better and better.

(4)

Walking in the world, everyone is longing for love and understanding. As a woman, it is understandable that she longs for a warm support and someone to protect her from wind and rain. However, there are too many risks in placing your future completely in the hands of a man.

If he can pamper you for a lifetime, that will be your blessing.

If he only pampers you for a while, how will you face the rest of your life.

We can enjoy the sweet words from men occasionally, but we don’t need to regard those so-called sweet words as a vow of love, just listen.

I really like a poem by Shu Ting: If I love you, I will never be like the climbing flower in the sky, borrowing your high branches to show off; if I love you, I will never be like the infatuated bird, serving as a shade of greenery. Repeating monotonous songs. I must be a kapok tree near you, standing with you as the image of a tree. The roots are clenched in the ground; the leaves are touching in the clouds.

Perhaps this is the best look of love, and this is the attitude that a woman should have. I love you, but I will never cling to you; we stand side by side, resisting the wind and frost, bathing in the sunshine, and feeling the beauty of this world together.