Old age: Does the end of life have to be gray? How do we old people face death …

We are young and healthy, so what should the elderly do in the face of various problems of old age and physical decline?

We are still young, and we will be extremely afraid of sudden death. So, what about the old man who is about to come to the end of his life?

At the end of life, what is the mentality of the old man in the face of the scheduled death?

This problem has been bothering me for a long time.

A proposition that no life can escape.

In the face of this problem, what we actually think is the way we face death ourselves.

2

Let's start with my grandfather.

Grandpa was born in 193 1, almost 9 1. I have a good mouth and a good physique. I can go out for a walk after dinner every day. But more often, grandpa always sits at the door alone, watching the traffic on the road, taking out cigarettes from time to time, and can't help smoking a few mouthfuls.

Many times, I went to see my grandfather and pushed the room open. There is a dim light in it. I thought I wasn't at home. When I looked carefully, a lonely figure was sitting in a chair, facing the TV. The TV was off and the lights were off, so I just sat alone. Every time I encounter such a scene, I always feel inexplicably sad.

The younger generations have grown up, but our parents and grandchildren are struggling in their own lives and can't stop. In particular, almost all grandchildren have left their hometown to work hard, and neither time, space nor financial resources can provide too much support, let alone too much company for grandpa.

Grandma died in a foreign country last year, and the younger generation didn't dare to tell grandpa after handling it.

Grandpa asked about grandma several times, and we all lied. The family also tacitly unified the caliber, fearing that it would have too much influence on the elderly.

But from grandpa's lonely expression again and again, I can clearly feel that grandpa is perceptive. Later, he didn't ask anything about grandma, and even kept silent. From this escape silence, I see that there seems to be another corner missing from Grandpa's aging life.

Grandpa's life has been maintained for many years, especially in the last ten years. Grandpa's physique gradually lost its former toughness, and the grandfather who appeared in my field of vision the most was such a lonely figure.

Sitting alone, smoking or dozing off.

When I was young, colorful life, on my deathbed, will inevitably turn gray.

Every time I go home, I try to find time to sit down and chat with my grandfather and listen to his life memories and past events that I have heard countless times.

However, such companionship is rare and has become a hole in my life. There's nothing I can do, and I don't know how to fill it.

That hole is empty, right there. Don't say anything

three

Some time ago, by chance, my friends and I transferred to several nursing homes in the city.

I'm impressed.

Comparing several nursing homes, whether public or private, no matter the environment is good or bad, no matter how cheap the nursing home is, the charging standard is more than 3,000 yuan per person per month. The charging mode is basically divided into different levels according to self-care ability, and the basic expenses do not include TV fees, air conditioning fees, meals, haircuts, medicines, medical care and other inevitable expenses in life.

There is a big room. If you want to live in a better single room or couple suite, you have to continue to add money, ranging from 6000 to 10000.

It's better to take care of yourself. If their self-care ability is slightly weak, they will have to pay a lot of nursing fees and medicine fees.

Some nursing homes have good environmental conditions and a yard where people can walk. More is a small building, similar to a school dormitory. The sunshine and lighting are not very good, and the supporting handrails and the access conditions for the disabled are also uneven. Some nursing homes will also take in elderly people with poor spirits, shouting and wandering around during the day and night, and there is no guarantee of rest and quiet at ordinary times.

Recreation and leisure activities depend entirely on the sense of responsibility and management ability of nursing homes. Some of them have activities occasionally, but most of them are just a formality. It's hard to say whether the service personnel are professional or patient enough.

What's more, the elderly have to endure the blame, ridicule and even difficulties of nursing staff. People with weak self-care ability may make you have to wait a long time to get to the bathroom even if you change diapers.

Of course, not all nurses have bad attitudes, but it is really extravagant to expect all nurses to speak softly, tenderly and considerate. After all, it is difficult for people who are willing to do this job to have high academic qualifications, including professional level.

So the operator of a nursing home said: In fact, children are very important to these old people. Even the children of unfilial grandchildren can make nursing staff feel a little scared. Don't bully these old people with children too much, or someone will settle accounts with them.

When you are old, you have no money and no children. It's really a risky thing.

four

After transferring to these nursing homes, I fell into deep thinking.

It turns out that it is so difficult to have a sense of security and support for the elderly.

With the development of society, many people's lifestyles, family composition, people's ideas, the gap between the rich and the poor and so on. Will bring many unpredictable changes, affecting our lives until the end of our lives.

This contrast, like my grandfather's situation, is not bad.

But the good is still the same. Can you imagine the bad?

Who can guarantee that our generation can live well when they are old? You can rely on your old age.

Who can guarantee that we will be strong and healthy when we get old?

Who can guarantee that if we want a sip of water and a bite of rice after our legs and feet are inconvenient, someone can pass it up?

After thinking, these thoughts even turned into fear.

five

There is another reality that I haven't seen, but it will definitely appear: I died when I was old.

There will be a list at the back of the charging standard of each nursing home: hospice care. Prices range from 1000 to 2000. Does not include ambulance, urn and other expenses.

When I first saw this word, I couldn't help shivering. The death of a life, originally on paper, is just a few words and a string of prices behind it. It turned out to be just normal business practices and profit-making projects.

As a care worker, I don't know how many times I've faced you like this, where will you go? And all this, in their eyes, is a state of life. Or just a normal work project. This has nothing to do with emotion.

These old people have great difficulty in turning over, sitting up and even breathing and swallowing every day. When they suffer from illness every day, they have to accept the anxiety and fear that an old friend is about to die.

People are afraid of death when they are young. Aren't they afraid when they get old?

And after the ups and downs of their lives, what kind of psychological construction and self-healing do they have to go through on the threshold of bidding farewell to this world before they can wave goodbye to this world safely?

This is a sensitive and unavoidable topic in life.

six

Back in time, these old people in front of us, without exception, used to be the same as we are now. They are just the right age, walk like flies, eat a lot of meat, drink in a big bowl and are full of energy. They are the pillars of a family or even a larger team, and they are full of high fighting spirit.

But in the past, all the precipitation was not necessarily beautiful, and everyone felt different joys and sorrows in their own destiny.

Maybe they didn't do anything wrong, maybe they are better and harder than we are now, but time and years have pushed the wheel of life forward step by step, here and to the next unknown distance.

Fate is an inescapable truth for everyone.

If it's us, what will we look like in a few decades, when we get old, when our bodies are no longer young, and when we inevitably face aging and disease? What kind of life can you achieve?

Can we enjoy our old age in peace?

Now, what should we do to resist this destructive life cycle when we are young?

I don't know the answer, and I think no one can give us the answer.

I hope I can do this problem well.

May everyone get what they want.