Romantic love, humorous sentences

1, people who know food will not eat well-done steak; People who know how to love will not promise eternity. 2. Red beans don't grow in the south, but grow on my face. I miss you so much! I am a passer-by who you turn around and forget. Why should I spend time with you on earth? Boy, you are my sister's man, so hang a card with me today! 5, dear, help me sign the household registration book, just in the spouse column ... 6, if someone pursues, there is no woman who is not on cloud nine. This is why women are so charming. 7, boy, in order to stop hurting the relationship between men and women in the world, my sister will accept you as a grievance. From now on, remember to be on call, don't entangle ... 8. Good men let women know the world, and bad men let women misunderstand the world. 9. The temperature of love is like bath water. It's not that the hotter the better, but that you feel comfortable. 10, if you and I are separated, then this world will cease to exist. For the sake of the 6.4 billion people in the world, come with me! 1 1, love, just say it out loud, because you never know, tomorrow or accident will come first! 12, love is cheap, and it is cheap again and again. When you stop being a bitch, women will come. 13. The deeper and more mature the husband is, the more spoiled the wife is. 14, wife: "Please! For me, stop drinking! " Husband: "Nonsense! I didn't drink it for you. " 15, where there is marriage, there are rivers and lakes. You and I are in the Jianghu together. How can there be no gossip about us in the Jianghu? Marry me quickly and let those paparazzi gossip about others! 16, I like you so much, you can die if you love me! I love you so much that if you like me, I will live forever! 17, you will know what comedy is when you meet me! Do not believe, you try! 18, you are the most beautiful in my eyes: aquiline nose, toad mouth, round-legged mouse eyes, nose and mouth, dripping and drooling. 19, outside the Qingshan building outside the mountain, my brother is as strong as an ox. The spring breeze makes my brother drunk and only treats dinosaurs as beautiful girls. Dear, Happy Valentine's Day! 20, you are my bread when I am hungry, you are my suicide fruit knife, you are my heart, you are my liver, you are three quarters of my life! 2 1, when love talks, like the chorus of the gods, the whole heaven is intoxicated with Yue Xian. 22. I am very excited to see your name; Hear your voice; Please go out three times and five times; Afraid of acting rashly; Hey! ... I didn't move when I saw you. 23. Do you know what I want to eat on Valentine's Day? Boil you, fry you, steam you; Roast you, stew you and braise you in soy sauce; Fried you, fried you, cold salad you! 24. That day you flew in front of the crow in the sky, and I was chased by the hairy dog on the ground; You come from the sea. Crabs climb up and down, and I am a pea on the ground. 25, stupid man+stupid woman = marriage; Stupid man+smart woman = divorce; Smart man+stupid woman = extramarital affairs; Smart man+smart woman = romantic love. Romantic talk about love sentence humor 2 1, occasionally thinking of pain is only a moment, and years will gradually make you heartless. 2. In friendship, I do better than anyone else; In love, I do worse than anyone else. 3. A woman who wants to be the first man must want to be the only one. I like you to dig my ear. I like it when you call me wheat. I prefer to call you baby. 5, there are many small things, in fact, nothing, if you feel sad in your heart, just say it. 6. Many people come into your life. Just to teach you a lesson. Then turn around and leave. 7. After a man falls in love with a woman, he will write poems; When a woman falls in love with a man, she dreams. 8, the crowd looked for her thousands of Baidu, suddenly looking back, that person still shrugged off me. 9. Experiencing love is like eating chocolate. Even if you don't have to pay for chocolate, you have to pay for weight loss. 10, the sky is blue, the sea is deep, I am true to you, love you is eternal, and it is impossible to marry you. 1 1, men pretend to understand if they don't understand, but women are just the opposite. 12, women must understand and remember that men-as long as they are men, regardless of age, they love beautiful women. 13, love is like a photo, which needs a lot of darkroom time to cultivate. 14, there is love besides teeth. 15. Love is like a train. Even if you buy a ticket, the train will leave if you are late. 16, just love, more like a beautiful and desolate gesture after a grand occasion. 17, my love, don't listen to me, but you must do what you promised me! 18, if missing is the appendix, at least it can be removed, but for me, missing is the heart! 19, I love your appearance, but you don't love mine. 20. Don't be coquettish and shock the world with lewdness. If I were a judge, I would sentence you to life imprisonment. Confined in my heart. 22. If you can't dress your woman in a wedding dress, don't stop you from unbuttoning her clothes! Before getting married, the man said that he dared to go to hell for her. After getting married, he found that he really went to hell. 24. Love is like an elevator, which is convenient and quick, but occasionally you have to climb the stairs to go home in the dark. 25. When I love you, you are a stone; When I hate you, you are a zombie! Romantically talking about love sentence humor 3 1, God created women, and women hurt men. 2. Love makes you think, and marriage makes you worry. 3. I was pulled out before I had time to get involved with the flowers. 4. Love is a judgment, and marriage is a judgment. There are two ways to end love: breaking up or getting married. 6. The purpose of marriage is to give men a goal of making money. 7. Love is buried in your heart, not in your mouth. 8. Love ends in the blink of an eye and marriage begins in the blink of an eye. 9. Women are like cats, men are like dogs, and marriage is a cat-dog war. 10, love is countless meals, marriage is a meal. 1 1. Men don't like labyrinth marriage, but prefer harem marriage. 12, God created husband and wife, and husband and wife created a third party. 13, marriage is like a maze, and the people who built it have lost their way first. 14, men never regret getting married, but regret not marrying another woman. 15, stay calm before marriage, stay calm after marriage-a woman said. 16, regret falling in love for four years in college, and regret not falling in love for a lifetime in college! 17, the hope of life is marriage, and the only hope after marriage is divorce. 18, when a man foresees a woman, he will get lost; When a man foresees his wife, he will be confused. 19, love is like playing bridge, it all depends on calculation; Marriage is like playing mahjong, all by luck. 20, the perfect marriage is: let the husband live in hell, but feel like in heaven. 2 1. Marriage without love will become a pantomime, and marriage with love will become a farce. 22. If you ignore me, I will become a steamed stuffed bun … and it is the most famous in Tianjin … hehe. What makes you tired is not the distant mountain, but a grain of sand in your shoe. If you see a shadow in front of you, don't be afraid, it's because there is sunshine behind you. 25. Marriage is the grave of love, but if you don't get married, love will have no good end. 26. When arguing with others, take a step back and broaden your horizons; When chasing a girlfriend, take a step back and go to an empty building. 27. There are two kinds of wives: lovely and hateful. There are two kinds of husbands: poor and ok. 28. If everyone looked down on their own joys and sorrows, there would be no Romeo and Oedipus. 29. We were too young before BC and too old after AD. No one can witness the true beauty! 30. Memories are sad, expectations are lost, and the current passion is mixed with ecstasy and despair. 3 1, in love, some people "feel like they are dead"; In marriage, some people "see death as death". Take good care of your wife and be a civilized husband, so that you won't fight back, scold you and greet your cold face with a smile. 33. When a man needs a challenge, he will get married. Once he gets married, all he needs is to bear the burden. 34. Mom said that people had better not miss two things, the last bus home and someone who loves you deeply. 35. I heard that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. Looking back, I actually streaked in Too Many Cooks for 20 years. 36. The best revenge is not to destroy each other or yourself, but to live happier and happier than him. 37. If you love someone, what you need is to show love; If you marry someone, what you need is weakness. There are two kinds of modern people: those who are unmarried but want to get married. One is a person who is married but wishes to remain unmarried. 39. Most men and women feel cheated after marriage. The only difference is that the wife decided to continue to let her husband be fooled. 40. The only knife that a woman should practice is the knife that cuts vegetables. For women, this knife method is more effective than any other knife method. 4 1. Whether the marriage is a tragedy or a comedy, the audience always feels that they are watching a comedy, and the actors always feel that they are acting a tragedy. 42. Adhere to the absolute leadership of your wife. Wife always comes first, children second, dogs third and I fourth. 43. If a man gives up his boss, he will lose his wife; When a woman gives up her boss, she will get a husband. When people stop believing in the myth of love, they get married. But they don't know that there is no apotheosis in marriage. 45. No one in this world is worth your tears, and the only one who is, won't make you cry! 46. Your life is divided into past tense and future tense. Your marriage is only the present perfect tense, that is, to complete everything your wife told you. 47. Rabbits don't eat grass beside their nests, old cows like to eat tender grass, and good horses don't eat grass back. There is plenty of grass in the world. Once you get married, it becomes grass. 48. Love is like a diamond, bright but expensive; Marriage is like real estate. After impulse purchase, it is easy to get stuck if you have to repay the loan for a long time. 49. Marriage is not 1+ 1=2 but 0.5+0.5= 1. That is, two people cut off their respective personalities and shortcomings and then make do together. Regret is an emotion that enervates our spirit, causing a greater loss than loss and making a bigger mistake than mistake, so don't regret it. 5 1, what is love? Love is a treasure of nature, a treasure house of happiness, the greatest happiness and an inexhaustible blessing. 52. Before getting married, women will compare their current lovers with their former lovers. After marriage, a woman can only compare her current husband with the husband next door. 53. Marriage is like a magic show. It ended before you found the flaw, leaving only a suspicious mind and an invalid ticket. 54. I have known you for two years. These two years are my happiest time. My world is wonderful because of you, and my mood is turning because of you. 55. I like people who are "half-hearted": they have love, confidence and responsibility for me; Talking creatively makes me "satisfied"! 56, adhere to all the salary and bonus system. Don't tamper with your salary and don't hide your money in the closet. But you can apply for 500 yuan change every month. 57. If you are separated from Sanqiu, it is because of missing; The night is long because I miss you; The exhibition turned to the opposite side because of loneliness; I sleep alone because I'm counting sheep. 58. A good marriage gives you a good experience, a bad marriage gives you a bad experience, and a bad marriage gives you a pair of children and bills. 59. It's getting late. Now I'm walking alone in the street. I wonder what it's like to watch couples coming and going on the road late at night. Do you understand my heart? 60. Love is a kind of mental work, and marriage is a kind of physical work. Love is like playing bridge, it all depends on calculation; Marriage is like playing mahjong, all by luck.