Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Humorous poem

Humorous poem

1, I saw the sun, and I was so glorious that I just got divorced again. The mountain blocks the day, and there is no ticket. Only the boundless universe, boundless, can't stop the tears full of sadness. Ask me how much sadness I can have, just like endless gutter oil.

I worked too much overtime last night, so I felt dizzy and didn't know the way home. I was confused under the street lamp, strayed into the depths of garbage, exclaimed and exclaimed, and shocked countless mice.

3, a natural language will last forever, and the gift will be melatonin; When spring flowers and autumn moon, use Dabao skin care; I am a teenager, going to a technical school and going to Lan Xiang. I hope you will buy Mori Yoshiro for a long time!

This morning in spring, I woke up easily and happily, and I was bitten by mosquitoes every night. I used dichlorvos and bit immediately.

5, a spring is often rainy and windy, waking up all the leeks and onions in the garden. A tearful, frightened and lonely dream. Lazy enough to get drunk with two bottles of sand, shallots enjoy spring. I hate poverty because it is inflation.

6. The foot of my bed is so bright that it is suspected to be a grass nest. The grass nest is good and sheltered from the wind and rain. I recently lived in a grass nest, free and comfortable. Can I not love the grass nest!

7, the sunshine window is purple smoke, watching flies hanging on the wall. Seeing goodbye, my heart gave up, and several slaps were loud. Anger, anger, killing countless flies.

8, hammering the mountain, Dadu Bridge is cold. Sing my songs loudly, drink my wine, cold night. Every holiday season, Jiang Fengchou can't sleep.

9, nothing to surf the Internet at home, boring to find someone to chat with. The vast network is green and red, and the heart of chatting and meeting becomes empty. I made an appointment 480 times. How many dinosaurs were there?

10, when is your girlfriend? Turn around and ask your friend. I wonder if the beauty in the palace is smiling. I want to find a girlfriend, but I don't know where to go, so I have to cry.

1 1, when those red berries came in spring, they planted some trees in the yard to make the canal smooth, so a group of geese passed by the door, and the apes on both sides couldn't stop barking, and an apricot came out of the wall.

The sky is gray and wild, and there are no cattle and sheep in sight. The mountains are green, the water is Ying Ying, and the fallen flowers and mud are ground into ashes. True or false, false is true, true is false.

12, the sky is gray and the wilderness is vast. Looking up, I found that it was moonlight and sank back. I suddenly remembered my home, and then I shed tears and looked at the grass under my feet and the endless twilight. ...

In the spring morning, I woke up easily, and the job was too hard to find; Adventure to Shenzhen, the treatment is really small; Prices are rising year by year, and this year is the craziest; Life goes by slowly, leaving a secret sadness.

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15, after getting up, the company went and suddenly heard something in the kitchen. There are thousands of delicious foods, which are not as good as my relatives.

16, last night, the spring breeze swept the building, and the upstairs was brightly lit; Wine meets a thousand cups of friends, and friendship lasts forever; I'd like to propose a toast to you. I hope that friendship will have an afterlife.

Funny quotations from online humor

1, planting grass doesn't make people lie down, so plant cactus instead!

2. I have a little thought, but I don't lack it; I have a good temper, but not without it!

3. The difference between people and pigs is that pigs have always been pigs, but people are sometimes not people!

It turns out that as long as people are separated, people who are familiar with each other will gradually alienate.

5, go to the pizza shop to buy pizza! The waiter asked me whether to cut it into 8 pieces or 12 pieces. I thought about it and said: 8 yuan! 12 can't eat!

6, men fool women, called flirting; Women fool men, called seduction; Men and women fool each other, which is called love.

7. The government thinks about how to tax reasonably, the boss thinks about how to avoid taxes reasonably, and I think about how to sleep reasonably!

8. Time is for wandering, body is for loving, life is for forgetting, and soul is for singing.

9. Love is like a ghost. Many people believe it, but few people see it.

10, how far is it forever? Get out, boy!

1 1. It may seem so, but it may not. Give me a girl and I can create a country.

12, no one has stepped on my head since I turned into shit.

13, I want to puppy love, but it's already late. ...

14, my god! My clothes have lost weight again.

The important task after 15 and 80 is to manufacture 08.

16, people have plenty of backgrounds, but I only have my back ~ ~.

17, gold always shines, but when there is gold everywhere, I don't know which one I am.

18, reminding everyone that it is very important to learn how to repair notebooks! Once upon a time, there was a man who couldn't repair his notebook ... and everyone knows what happened afterwards.

19, I'm not a fortune teller in the square, so I can't say so much as you like.

20. It's not that the ending of the story is not good enough, but that we are too demanding of the story!

2 1, flowers often do not belong to people who appreciate flowers, but to cow dung.

The difference between a lie and an oath is that the listener takes it seriously and the speaker takes it seriously.

23. It's not difficult to be single, but it's difficult to deal with people who try their best to get you to end it.

Sometimes, it's not that the other person doesn't care about you, but that you take the other person too seriously.

25. Even if you believe it, there are lies hidden in the middle.

Humorous adaptation of ancient poems and sentences

1, light rain in Weicheng, heavy rain kills people. Apes on both sides of the strait keep crying, so they take two steps if they have nothing to do. Peach Blossom Pond is deep in thousands of feet, not as good as Xiaomi's affection for you.

2. When the thief lit a ray at the foot of my bed, the thief climbed into the window. Open the safe. It looks like a refrigerator. I miss the bright line at the foot of the bed at night. Li Bai is naked. Jump on a bed and have fun.

3, looking at the mountains from a distance, perverting; Close listening to water is silent, parallel imports; Spring has gone and flowers are still there, flower monk; Birds are not surprised when people come. Birds are people. Ha ha ha ha.

4, the restaurant owner laughed at me, laughed at me now, don't pay, just drink vegetable soup. Recently, I dare not say what happened that day. People went to the building and there was no bowl of soup. Where can I find delicious vegetable soup?

5. Enter the freshman year, determined to travel thousands of miles. When I graduated from my senior year, I was full of courage. A friendship between gentlemen is as light as water, just like a farmer's mineral water. Mochow has no confidant in the road ahead, and they are all brothers who failed.

6, the paper is shallow, since ancient times, the melon is bitter and sweet, and there are shocking people on the Internet. We have been leading the way for dozens of days, and neither of us is happy-we will go to the ends of the earth, berth the Wu Dong Wan Li boat at the door, talk naked about dew points, and stay on earth!

The foot of my bed is shining with such bright light. What is the flicker? The sky is full of little stars. Is there frost already? But when I looked up, I found it was moonlight. I bowed my head and thought of my wife. Listening to love songs made me cry.

8. I want to go home by wind, but I don't have to go home by oblique wind and drizzle. I wanted to go by boat again, but the boat was late, and it was windy. The house leaked rain and it rained all night. Life is gloomy and frustrated, and it is more difficult to get rid of it after several storms.

9, chirp, reading is tasteless. I can't smell reading, only women sigh. Ask a woman what she thinks and what she remembers. I'm afraid the vegetables I planted last night are not on the ground.

10, weeding is at noon, and mahjong is hard all day. Hands can pick stars, but flowers touch each other on the bar. Spring is gone, flowers are still there, and three yuan and four joys touch cards by themselves. People are not surprised when they come, and they never care about winning or losing.

1 1, last year today, in this door, some guns touched themselves and touched each other; People don't know where to go, and pork prices skyrocket; Close to the water tower, you get the moon first, and let him go southeast and northwest; People in Qian Fan, near the shipwreck, are different every year!

12, the weekend has passed, so we need to wait. It's hard to go to work. Think about how wonderful college life is. Get up at ten o'clock, skip class, or find an internet cafe. The campus is picturesque, and heroes come forth in large numbers for a time. Only by studying in the evening before the exam can we find the key points at the critical moment.

13, Roche has a good daughter who calls herself Yufeng. Yufeng is good at surfing the Internet and posting marriage invitation cards directly. He must have a bad smile when he saw Yufeng in his later years. When he saw Yufeng, he ran away.

14, asking how much sadness you can have, let me strangle your tenderness. Without words, I went to the west wing alone. I'll leave when I say, and I won't let go all the way.

15, such a bright line is at the foot of my bed. Li Bai was so hungry that he looked down at the mouse and looked up at the cockroach. It was really heartbreaking.

16, barking is terrible. Beauty is not afraid of pain when bitten. Bite marks as deep as thousands of feet, not as fast as a puppy. Excuse me, where did the puppy come from? Passers-by show handsome guys!

17, Yishui, Guazhou, Jingkou, a line of egrets went to heaven, just like walking gently, waving your sleeves, leaving innocence on earth without taking away a cloud.

18, when are the spring flowers and the autumn moon? How much do you know in your heart? The small building was easterly again last night, and acacia was always in the wind and rain. Carved jade fence should still exist, but the name will be changed. Ask how much sadness you can have, just like my heart and blood are flowing everywhere.

19, Zhang San didn't give money by boat, and the boatman got off the boat, and the Peach Blossom Lake was deep in thousands of feet. I don't know whether Zhang San is dead or not, but I don't understand the boatman's heart.

20. You are a brick tempered in the mountains. Sunrise in the east and rain in the west finally killed Saddam. The dragon will get water one day, which will make you boast every day.

2 1, I went to the west building alone without saying a word, and the lonely phoenix tree stream of people kept cutting and the reason was chaotic. It was a parting from sorrow, and I didn't have a trace of acacia in my heart.

22, the road is long, Xiu Yuan Xi, but God thundered and the door broke a hole, so I asked for a "lock" up and down. When I am old, I am lonely and no one loves me. I only blame puppy love in those days. If there is love in the sky, it will be old. Puppy love made me die early. Alas.

When those red berries come in spring, spring is very suitable for feeding chickens. The moon, now round at sea, is just right for feeding chickens. And 1000 kinds of voices were quiet, only the sound of chicken pecking was heard. I will raise my sail tomorrow, and the chicken feathers are falling.

24, two orioles singing green willows, a snail crawling, two orioles laughing, the grapes are still early, what should we do now, stupid birds fly to the forest early and climb step by step.

25-year-old, met his grandson, prosperous, and just divorced. The mountain blocks the day, and there is no ticket. Only the boundless universe, boundless, can't stop the tears full of sadness. Ask me how much sadness I can have, just like endless gutter oil.

26. I worked too much overtime last night and didn't know the way home. I was confused under the street lamp, strayed into the depths of garbage, exclaimed and exclaimed, and shocked countless mice.

27. A natural language will last forever, and the gift will be melatonin; When spring flowers and autumn moon, use Dabao skin care; I am a teenager, going to a technical school and going to Lan Xiang. I hope you will buy Mori Yoshiro for a long time!

28. This morning in spring, I woke up carefree, and I was bitten by mosquitoes every night. I used dichlorvos and immediately bit it.

29. It often rains and windy in spring, which wakes up all the leeks and onions in the garden. A tearful, frightened and lonely dream. Lazy enough to get drunk with two bottles of sand, shallots enjoy spring. I hate poverty because it is inflation.

30, the foot of my bed is so bright that it looks like a grass nest. The grass nest is good and sheltered from wind and rain. I recently lived in a grass nest, free and comfortable. Can I not love the grass nest!

3 1, purple smoke in the sunshine window, looking at the flies hanging on the wall from a distance. Seeing goodbye, my heart gave up, and several slaps were loud. Anger, anger, killing countless flies.

32, hammering the mountain, Dadu Bridge is cold. Sing my songs loudly, drink my wine, cold night. Every holiday season, Jiang Fengchou can't sleep.

humorous

1, it's not difficult to drive, and I'm afraid there will be new people.

2, drink a catty of white wine, I absolutely don't feel it, because I have already drunk half a catty.

3, laying hens, cockfighting.

4. Either live well or die quickly.

5. There is no rehearsal in life, but live broadcast every day.

6, the four steps of a successful life: 1, can withstand loneliness; 2. boycott * *; 3. Know how to give up; 4. Learn to choose.

7. Loneliness is said without love, and loneliness is said with love.

8. I studied sacred knowledge, and you actually measured it by scores, which is simply a stain on academics!

9. Men fantasize about me and I fantasize about heaven.

10, parents fool their children into calling education; Children fool their parents and say that their parents are derailed; Fooling each other is called the generation gap.

1 1. Men don't make money, women are anxious, and men make money and women regret it.

12, to be honest, I don't know if my children will inherit my funny temperament when they grow up.

13, the road is bumpy, give a shout and go on.

14, save the last sip of water for comrades in need, and give me that bottle of orange juice.

15, tears are meaningless and futile liquids, and people who shed tears are stupid and pathetic.

16, computer, come on, let me go, I am a person with homework.

17, protect yourself and love others, please don't come out in the middle of the night to scare people.

18, coming to school early every day, seems to love learning, but several people know that we are here to copy homework.

19, marry a chicken and follow it; Marry a dog and follow the dog; Marry a monkey and run all over the mountain; Marry me and treat you to roast goose!

20. In ancient times, Guan Yunchang played chess and scraped bones for healing. Today, I watched a belt stop bullets.

2 1, I want to be an onion in my next life, and whoever bullies me will burst into tears.

22. I have a little mind, but I don't lack it; I have a good temper, but not without it!

23. I can't stand you! You are so ugly, do me a favor, everyone is a fairy, and stop sexually harassing me, okay?

24. When there is no money, there are a group of friends; There are a group of bodyguards when you have money.

25. Tell the person you like. If the person you like rejects you, your heart will be cold! It won't be hot!

26. The math teacher took us swimming in the ocean of problems. As a result, she went ashore and we all drowned.

27. Women's clothes are called capital, and men's clothes are called perverts.

28. Better fight with wise men than talk to SB!

29, smelly smelly smelly really smelly, strange leather, toad mouth, tiger nose, pig ears, see how smelly you are!

30. If you wake up at night, don't forget to cover your roommate with a quilt.

3 1, my mother told me when I was a child, don't be an irresponsible person, so now I'm stupid.

In today's society, it is useless to cook raw rice into mature rice. Even if it turns into popcorn, the runner will still run.

33. Shit, I've been complained! The client said that the mp3 file I gave him had no image!

34, go to hell, what will eventually die of youth, I bet on eternity!

35. Happiness is a comparative level. There's something at the bottom to feel it.

36. Life is like fighting the landlord. One minute you are a group, and the next you are enemies.

37, so desperately trying to make people who once looked down on me shut up.

38, sit with a big breast name and enjoy the treatment of * *!

39. The next time a man scolds you for having thick legs, you should answer him back, but your legs are thin and all three legs are thin.

40, men and men are really strange, with tickets will go bad; Take a sauna every day; He doesn't love his good wife at home; The more lovers, the more pies.

4 1, a woman has no so-called loyalty. As long as someone is better to her, she will change her mind.

42. When arguing, the difference between a man and a woman is like the difference between a rifle and a machine gun.

43, even believe in advertisements, you are stupid to read!

44. You must have serious procrastination, otherwise, you are still alive.

45, since I became a bubble excrement, no one dared to step on my head again.

46. In front of China, Thailand, wearing yellow jerseys, had the demeanor of Brazil in a trance.

47. Choosing a university doesn't care if it's the key, there is no air conditioning anyway!

I don't usually dump ugly girls, but you are an exception.

49. playing with feelings? I will make you cry rhythmically.

50. An old friend resigned from the Yellow Crane Tower and sent a bucket of oil before he left. As he walked, he thought, this boy is really awkward.

5 1. Freedom is not given by others, but pursued by ourselves.

52, on impulse, the later crisis!

53. When others look back, that person is already at the grating. I looked back to see where the man was.

54. You are a rose. I want to pick it, but you are afraid of pricking it.

When a woman tells you that she hates you, it means that she likes you. When a man tells you that he hates you, he really hates you.

56. Leader's voice: A wife is sincere and valuable, but the price of gold and silver is higher. If it's money, I'd rather let people soak it.

57. If being handsome is a crime, then I have committed a heinous crime. If fashion is a mistake, then I have been wrong again and again. What a miserable life!

58. The rice screen screens the Mimi center and tells my sister to really love Lang, instead of learning to screen thousands of eyes, learn to be a candle.

59. You are gold and I am coal. You will shine, and I will get hot. Don't mess with me, or I will melt you.

60, and you made me kneel and rub the washboard. Kneeling and electric heating really can't stand it!

6 1, I'd rather you hold another woman and miss me than you hold me and miss another woman.

62. If one day men all over the world menstruate, I will sell sanitary classics.

63. There is no right or wrong in the world, because there are more people who say right or wrong, so there is right or wrong.

64. Even if the world is out of balance, lies will get a good night's sleep.

65. We walked so fast that our souls couldn't keep up.

66. I finally realized in tears that some people can never come back once they are dark.

When I reached the top of the mountain, I found that the wrong road and the right road were only a few steps away.

68. Flowers often don't belong to people who appreciate them, but to cow dung.

69, handsome has a fart to use! Finally, I was eaten by a chess piece!

70. Looking back, you are expecting; Look sideways, you are disappointed; Look ahead, you're desperate.

7 1. A white lie is a good excuse for your deception.

72. We should be the most stubborn age and lack the courage to persist in love.

73. They said that the Internet was fake, and I laughed as if the reality was true.

74. A big woman can't live without electricity for a day, and a little woman can't live without money for a day!

75. Going to the toilet to read the newspaper is equivalent to wiping the stool, which is a process, otherwise it is not finished.

76, the same is swearing, beauty is true temperament, ugliness is no tutor!

77. In fact, the frequency of a day is very short, and the computer passes as soon as it is turned on and off.

78. What is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman hits small monsters!

79, it's raining, don't forget to bring an umbrella, wet body is small, gonorrhea is troublesome!

80. Lazy personality, interest is playing, specialty is eating, and skill is sleeping.

Humorous

Human nerves are very resilient. The dead can stretch for a long time after soaking in the formalin pool and then picking out the sciatic nerve. The following humorous sentences are arranged and shared, hoping to help you! 1, planting grass doesn't make people lie down, so plant cactus instead!