The baby has been in my belly for 6 months, but I have been diagnosed with cancer. What should I do?

Sister, I want to tell you my story. I discovered an ovarian tumor about six months ago, but it was not confirmed to be cancer at the time. However, the doctor said that my situation was not optimistic at the time and that I needed to do something immediately. Surgery, but the doctor also said that the surgery might lead to miscarriage. I thought about it again and again, and the baby would move in my belly. I was very reluctant to let it go, so I chose to wait. As a result, the baby was more than seven months old after the surgery. He weighed only three pounds when he was born, which was very pitiful. He stayed in the incubator for about twenty days. Now he is over two years old, very healthy, and no different from a child born normally! And I was also diagnosed with ovarian cancer when my child was born. My child is my spiritual pillar and a gift from God. No matter what happens tomorrow, I firmly believe that I made the right choice. Of course, my child may face various postmenstrual problems. During this test, discuss it with your husband, listen to your family’s opinions, stay in a good mood, and hope that a miracle will happen to you, mother and son!

I am not a doctor. I am telling you as a cancer patient who has been fighting cancer for two years and seven months, kid! Don't give birth! If you have an early-stage cancer that can be operated on and has a good prognosis, such as cervical cancer, thyroid cancer, etc., consult your doctor and consider giving birth to a child, because you still have hope of recovery! This is not to say that other cancers cannot be cured at all, but the hope is too slim! I have lung cancer! I can’t even think about recovery, I just hope that the medicine will be effective and not resistant! I have a daughter who is almost five years old. After I got sick, I always thought, how wonderful it would be if I didn’t have a child. I would have no worries and I could leave with peace of mind! But reality is often cruel! When I think about my children, I feel extremely uncomfortable! I can't take care of her when I'm sick! I can't grow up with her! That feeling makes my heart twitch every time I think about it! real! Only those who have experienced it will understand! Although the child is already six months old, he is still alive! But were you really kind to her by bringing her into the world? It is a very cruel thing for a child to have no mother! If you are not sure that you can grow up with her, then don't bring her into the world. Although it is cruel, there is nothing you can do! I once saw a cancer-fighting mother who was also pregnant with cancer and had to give birth to her child! By the way, it is also dangerous for cancer patients to give birth to children. If something unexpected happens, how will your children celebrate their birthdays in the future? That mother got a lot of praise for what she did and said how brave she was! I'm not saying she's bad, but I don't agree with her behavior at all! Record videos for your children until their 25th birthday! I said, what's the use? What if in the future, this child has a stepmother who is very good to her? Should you watch this video or not? What will the children think after watching it? What if she has no memory of her biological mother and treats her stepmother as her biological mother? Do you want to watch the video once a year and make your children sad? I discussed this issue with my patient and she had the same idea as me! She hopes that the child will stay with her stepmother, which is also good for the child! She was 36 years old, her child was four years old, and she left in June! Who knows how helpless she is! ? She is very strong, but I know she still can't let go of the child! So don't be emotional when you have a choice! What is called life, you are going to die! This is how I feel since I got sick! Cancer is really painful, you can’t imagine it! I am now suffering from the side effects of the medicine and all kinds of physical discomfort! All kinds of pain! You also have to bear the pressure of dying at any time! But I still want to persevere and don't want to die. I really can't let go of my child! Without her, it doesn't matter when I die. Rather than suffer the pain and suffering, it would be better to die! Okay, let’s not talk anymore. The more we talk, the more negative we become! I can’t hold back my tears! I don’t know what kind of cancer you have, but I sincerely hope that it is relatively mild and not serious. You can give birth to a child and accompany her to grow up. She is indeed the continuation of life! Good luck to you!

It will take another month to cut it out. Although it is premature, the survival rate is quite high. If you think about it for a moment, if it were me, I would choose to give birth. My family and loved ones will take good care of this baby after I leave. But the child is the continuation of life. Of course you also need to evaluate your own family situation.

The ninth episode of "Human World" tells about a 26-year-old young mother who was unfortunately diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer when she was 5 months pregnant. The doctor said that surgery had no meaning for her. , it was recommended that she induce labor first and then receive treatment immediately, otherwise the longer she delayed, the smaller her hope of life would be.

Her first reaction was to ask: "Will my tumor infect the child?" The doctor said no. She said, "Then I want to give birth to the child. If anyone asks me to induce labor, I will do it." Jump off the stairs."

Fortunately, with the full rescue efforts of the doctors, a premature baby was born, named "Xiao Long Bao", and then this The new mother cheered up, put on a festive red coat, and started recording a birthday video for Xiao Long Bao. There were 18 videos, from the child's age of 1 to 18, so that the child would always see her young look... ··

Welcoming the arrival of a new life is a happy thing, but data shows that about one in every one thousand pregnant women will If a baby is diagnosed with cancer, will the fetus be infected with cancer?

Biological theory believes that most cancers will not infect the fetus. The placenta is like a strong barrier between the mother and the fetus, which will prevent cancer cells, even if a cancer cell can cross the placenta. The barrier is also rejected and destroyed by the fetus's immune system.

However, there will be special cases. The "Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences" once published a case of "cancer in pregnant women will be inherited in the fetus":

Professor Greaves found through research: " In the leukemia cells that affected the mother and daughter, a large piece of the short arm of chromosome 6 was missing, where the major histocompatibility complex (MHC) family happens to be distributed, and its main function is to encode cell surface antigens. These antigen markers allow the immune system to distinguish whether a cell is a foreign object. However, the missing piece of chromosome caused the mother's cancer cells to slip into her daughter's body and not be recognized by the immune system, eventually remaining in the baby. Causes in the body. ”

Although there are cases, the chance of a pregnant woman passing cancer cells to her fetus is quite small, mainly blood cancer and skin cancer, because these cancer cells are prone to mutation.

Let me tell you a story. Although it is a story, it is actually true:

My neighbor’s daughter-in-law was 25 years old and pregnant the year before last. Breast cancer was diagnosed when she was five months old. At that time, the doctor said that it was possible to survive or extend life after stopping the pregnancy. Her husband's family, my neighbor's wife, and her son thought about it and asked her to keep the baby. They persisted for a few months. I also had the same mentality. I felt reluctant to lose a little life halfway, so I refused the doctor's advice. When the child was less than eight months old, the cancer cells became more serious. It was best to have an early caesarean section to take out the baby. She was a girl. The baby survived, but due to delayed treatment, she was unable to save her life, and her young life ended at the age of 25.

In fact, if she had started listening to the doctor, she would not have left so early. The stimulation of estrogen during pregnancy made the cancer cells develop very quickly. She gave up treatment month after month. Her husband's family was selfish because of her. There are the bones and blood of his own family in his belly, and a woman is a great love. A woman is weak by nature, but a mother is strong.

Shortly after the woman’s death, the man married her, bought a house in Qingdao, and gave birth to a daughter. They lived a leisurely life without feeling the pain of losing his wife at all. The key point is that the couple It's not good to treat the eldest daughter at all. Think about it, can a stepmother be too attentive to other people's children?

Isn’t it a pity?

So people should be more selfish or selfish. As the saying goes, if you don't worry about leaving green hills without firewood, it is better to save your life first.

I always think about the good and don’t want the bad. It’s understandable and I hope so, but it’s not in line with objective reality.

Dear, we all understand your pain right now. But I tell you, don’t give birth to the child.

You know your situation very well. Even if you try your best to give birth to a child, there is a high chance that you will not be able to raise the child. Have you ever seen a child without a mother when he was a child? Really like grass. Do you know how painful it is for a child to be without a mother? This pain lasts a lifetime. Every mother tries her best to give her child the happiest life, but you can't give it now, so don't be obsessed and don't give birth to the child.

I believe you love your husband and family too. If you can no longer be with them in the future, why not give them a chance to start over? If you don’t have children, your husband may be able to start a new life, get married, and have children after experiencing the pain of losing his wife. But if you have children, I believe the sadness of your death will accompany your husband and children throughout your life. So, really, stop obsessing.

What you have to do now is to relax and take good treatment. Medical science is relatively advanced now. If your health gets better in the future, you may have a chance to have a baby again. A stranger is cheering for you, many strangers are cheering for you!

It must be raw. I don’t know what kind of cancer it is, but it’s been six months, and I still have three months to go until I give birth. Maybe I can have a caesarean section at seven months, so the doctor will decide. It’s better to have a longer pregnancy. Don’t induce labor, because cancer needs to be treated for a long time. I don’t know what kind of cancer it is. If it is a medical breakthrough and there are drugs that can treat it, the best and best results will take two years of treatment, and some cancers require drugs to maintain life. Even if you don’t need medication to maintain your condition, you still have to wait for a year or two before you can have children after the cancer is cured. There is a chance of getting pregnant and having children in the future, but the risks are there. The key is to have money at home, confidence in yourself, and optimism to defeat cancer. Of course, it also depends on what kind of cancer it is. It's not a big deal if there are medicines for some cancers, as long as you have money. The key is to find out what kind of cancer you have, understand it, and ask the doctor.

"Life is like playing poker. If you are not lucky enough, you will always get a few bad cards. When you catch some bad cards, you will know that you have lost."

——Documentary "The Human World"

The day before yesterday, someone in a mother's group sent a link to the documentary "The Human World", just casually, and then I burst into tears that afternoon dog.

From beginning to end, I could hardly stop my tears. It hit the softest part of my heart, because the protagonist of this true story is also a mother.

This girl is Zhang Lijun, 25 years old, just 5 months pregnant, a time full of expectations and joy, but she caught the bad card of cancer and was diagnosed with terminal pancreatic cancer.

I think no one can accept such a fate, especially when a girl is about to become a mother.

She was confused, panicked, and even desperate. The first thing she had to face was whether to keep the child.

The doctor suggested that she induce labor first and then receive treatment immediately, otherwise the longer she delayed, the smaller her hope of life would be.

Her first reaction was to ask: "Will my tumor infect the child?" The doctor said no. She said,

"Then I want to give birth to the child. If anyone asks me to induce labor, I will jump off the building."

Men may not be able to do anything We understand why her decision was so firm and decisive, but as a mother, we all understand how every little noise of the baby in the belly affects the mother.

Although she was not born yet, how could she give up that kind of fusion of flesh and blood?

Perhaps, her children are the biggest force that supports her going forward.

At this point in the documentary, it was because of the child that I saw Zhang Lijun's smile. She said, "Whenever I have negative emotions, the baby will kick me twice. I was in a daze, and suddenly it seemed like there was nothing to think about. I could still eat and sleep, the baby was very active in my belly, and the mother and son seemed to be in tune with each other."

I stayed in the hospital for 2 months. When the child was 7 months old, the doctors consulted and said it would be too late. If it was too late, it would be too dangerous for adults.

When Zhang Lijun’s relatives discussed with the doctor, everyone agreed to have the child born by caesarean section immediately. Her mother-in-law cried and said that if an adult and a child could only protect one person, of course it would be the adult.

Despite the advice of doctors and relatives, Zhang Lijun is still full of contradictions, because if she waits another week, the child's chance of survival will be much greater.

What finally convinced her was her concern for her children. She wondered who could take care of the children in her place if she was gone. She cried and said, "I'm not worried!"

She couldn’t let go of her husband. They had only been married for a year, and the happy words on the new house had not yet been torn off.

A 26-year-old girl who has not experienced many setbacks, when facing such hardships, she only thinks about the people around her.

The child came into the world when he was 7 months old. Due to premature birth and underdevelopment, doctors worked hard to save the baby, which weighed just over 2 pounds. Zhang Lijun and her husband called him Xiaolongbao.

A few days later, she was transferred from obstetrics and gynecology to pancreatic surgery. Maybe it was all good luck to Xiao Long Bao. After a more detailed examination, the doctor determined that her condition was more serious than imagined.

She had signet ring cell carcinoma, a very rare and dangerous tumor.

The doctor said that there was no point in surgery. All he could do now was to relieve her pain and prolong her life as much as possible.

After receiving this bad news, my husband almost collapsed and kept blaming himself to no avail. But in front of his wife, he kept suppressing his emotions and did not tell Zhang Lijun the truth.

The desperate situation magnified everything. While magnifying the girl's pain, it also magnified her light and the infinite love for her from her lover and family.

Every interaction with my husband is always filled with love. In such a desperate situation, her husband's love supported her, and her strong optimism also became her husband's support.

When Zhang Lijun was encouraged to undergo chemotherapy, she was worried that her hair would fall out and there would be no chance of growing it back.

Looking at her husband, she held back her tears and said it didn’t matter, she could still wear a wig even if it didn’t grow out.

“I’m going to get Lady Gaga, she has a white Bobo. She has a lot of colorful hair on her head."

After she was taken home, she was taken care of by her husband and her parents-in-law. Her father-in-law said, "I hope that in the next life, Zhang Lijun is my daughter and my son is my son-in-law."

Surrounded by love, Zhang Lijun becomes more and more optimistic. We are all praying for a miracle to happen.

After living in the hospital incubator for 2 months, her child Xiaolongbao is finally going home. But Zhang Lijun's condition suddenly worsened. Just the day before the child went home, she suddenly lost sight of one eye.

Her husband was extremely heartbroken, perhaps because she was thinking of her children back home, but she was so optimistic that it was heartbreaking, and said with a smile:

"I My husband is extremely weak. At least my eyes are still good now, so I feel that I have to cherish all my abilities, including speaking, including listening, and including normal thinking. Isn’t it great to be content? ”

Even though the torture of the disease became more and more cruel to her, she started to vomit when eating, was afraid of pain when taking a shower, and tumors began to grow all over her body.

But now that she had a child lying in her arms, she seemed so happy and content.

Now, she is worried about what she will do if her children grow up and remember what their mother looks like. She said that she really wished for a miracle to happen and that she could grow up with Xiao Long Bao.

But she also understood that miracles are too difficult, so there was a scene that would make all mothers cry.

The new mother steeled herself, put on a festive red coat, and started recording a birthday video for Xiao Long Bao.

She recorded 18 different videos, from the age of 1 to 18 years old, and she wanted to accompany her children in this way until they reach adulthood.

"Hey, Xiao Long Bao, today is December 3, 2016, right? Our Xiao Long Bao is one year old! Mom is here to wish you a happy birthday. Call Mom and she will give you a gift. Here it is, mom will spend it with you every birthday..."

Zhang Lijun also joked that in this way, all her children will always see is her young appearance. When the children are 20 years old, Even though he is 30 years old, his mother will always celebrate his birthday at such a young age.

But we would rather she not stay young forever, it would be nice to have a chance to grow old.

After watching the show, I almost stayed up all night. Looking at the daughter and husband next to me, I suddenly felt that I was so happy.

When you are alive, you are burdened not only with your own life, but also with the overwhelming love of those around you.

This world was originally turbulent, but it seemed so beautiful because of attachment.

Zhang Lijun posted a photo with a bright smile while she was ill. She wrote in the accompanying text:

"Fate is destined, and I am destined to encounter this disaster; Luck will change, please give me luck and let me spend more time with my husband and children. I want to hear my baby call me mommy, and I want to travel with my husband with long hair again. ”

Xiaolongbao is one month older than my Ningning. I wish that this optimistic mother could hear her child calling mommy. That is a moment that every mother will remember for the rest of her life. . I found the latest news about her on the Internet. She is still alive and continues to fight against the disease without giving up for a day.

She said, "The power of love is really strong, strong enough to support life."

I want to say to Zhang Lijun, lovely girl, the fragility of life will not By weakening the proportion of beauty, your life allows everyone to see a different precious meaning.

Also, you are also the best mother in the world!

If it were me, I would get rid of the child. I might think I am selfish and cold-blooded, but in the long run, if the child is born, the child will also be affected. If I have a disease, I will definitely take care of it. If you don't treat your child well, you won't be able to give her full maternal love, and you may even be unable to stay with your child for a few years before she's gone. What to do with the child in the future will be someone else's burden. Children without a mother will have a missing childhood.

Furthermore, raising children is very expensive, and medical treatment is also very expensive. How will you choose when the time comes?

If it were me, I wouldn’t want this child. Whether the disease is treated or not, the result is the same. I would rather spend the limited time with my parents and live the rest quietly by myself. Days, leaving no worries and no regrets.

There was once a mother just like you who had been married for many years but had never been able to conceive a child. After she became pregnant with the child, she discovered that she was ill, and the illness was particularly serious. The doctor said that she could only save the child or the adults. She could only choose one of the two. The family, especially her parents, cried and begged her on their knees to abort the child and try their best to treat the adult. But the pregnant woman refused and devoted herself to protecting the fetus.

In the third trimester of pregnancy, her cancer cells spread, so she used traditional Chinese medicine to treat the cancer conservatively while preserving the fetus. She did not even dare to take painkillers because she wanted her child to be healthy. Western medicine for cancer treatment is effective and relieves pain quickly, but it will definitely have many effects on the baby in the belly.

Thanks to the hard work of this cancer mother, the child was successfully born, and everything was fine. He was a baby boy. However, as a new mother, the cancer cells in her body had spread to every part of her body.

What I say here is not to suggest that you give up on being an adult after giving birth to a child. After all, you have to go through all kinds of hardships to give birth to a child, but you cannot take the child to school, start a family, or start a career. The child is born without a mother. ;

We do not encourage sick mothers to induce labor and treat their illnesses, because every fetus in the belly is a concentration of all the mother's love.

I just express my emotion at the greatness and selflessness of all mothers in the world.

I am @瑞宝 parenting, and I only focus on scientific parenting, so that both mother and baby can be healthy physically and mentally.