How do women get rid of the predicament of being kidnapped by the outside world?

Have you ever found women kidnapped by the outside world and their own high standards? For example:

Low academic qualifications will be considered as inferior to boys. If you have a high degree, you will be excellent, and you may be said to be difficult to marry.

As a stay-at-home mother, you always take care of your children at home and clean up the housework, which will be considered too comfortable, but going out to work will be said to be irresponsible to your family and children.

When we face these rumors, have we really explored our inner world? Have you ever combed emotions and conflicts? Do you doubt yourself?

What should we do to better deal with different opinions from outside?

Zhao Han, a well-known reading promoter, gave us the answer in her new book Understanding: The Fearless Truth.

The author believes that when women are bound by multiple identities, they should learn to break their inner limitations and let their self-esteem and self-confidence circulate, instead of objectifying themselves and attaching too much importance to other people's evaluation.

In the face of mixed comments from the outside world, we can squeeze bad comments and remarks into a sweet lemon juice.

0 1 lemon is bitter, but lemon juice is sweet.

In life, there are many people who are "sour", especially on the Internet.

For example, Sister Han once said on the Internet that she was very fat when she was a child and ate a lot of hamburgers at one meal. It meant that she ate more hamburgers.

Because most people are full after eating one hamburger, they can't eat any more, but Sister Han ate a lot of hamburgers by herself.

But it was commented by netizens: "Is this family too rich? I can afford so many hamburgers from a small meal. "

For example, Sister Han said that she was 38 years old, married and childless, but she was told that "I will never be happy without children."

Even if the video sent by Sister Han is good, the copy content and camera sense are good, and the traffic is large, it will still be "sour" by "detective" netizens.

Say, "Is this eyebrow fake? This makeup is too old. It must be ugly without makeup. " Wait, unfriendly remarks.

You see, no matter what you do or how you do it, someone will always tell you what to do.

So there is no need to rack one's brains to please others in order to get recognition and praise from others.

But have the courage to be hated, be yourself, and don't worry that others don't like it.

face life with a smile

When you are wronged, smile calmly. Smile when you are in pain. When you are despised, smile calmly.

Laugh at life, have the ability to integrate and become a confident, comfortable, independent and stable self.

Infinite possibilities are self-achievement.

In the book Infinite Possibility, he said: "If an egg is broken by external force, it is the end of life; If the egg is broken by internal force, that is the beginning of life. "

It can be seen that the beginning of a miracle is always inside things.

When we are told by the voices around us that our abilities are limited and we have no achievements, we may also doubt ourselves. For example, after reading a book and remembering only a little content, you will feel that you are not the material for reading and have self-limitation.

Actually, it's just because we have less training.

Memory is the same as body muscles. A person who exercises more will have strong muscles.

On the other hand, if you can exercise more reading speed and remember more reading content, you will have a strong memory like fitness.

Therefore, it's not that you are not intelligent, but that you lack growth thinking and are limited by the inherent thinking of daily life. Here are some examples to see if this is the case.

For example, if you make a small mistake at work, you will feel that you are not careful enough. If you fail in the exam, you will regret it. If you can't read a book without reading a few pages, you will feel that you are not serious enough and don't work hard enough.

And if he is a person with growth thinking, he will look for reasons from himself and from the failed events. After analyzing the reasons, I began to look for ways to solve dyslexia.

For example, work mistakes may be due to lack of ability, then analyze the reasons for lack of ability and find solutions to avoid making the same mistakes in the next job.

In the "infinite possibility", there are too many possibilities in itself, including failure and evaluation by others.

If I can't face it well, I will be easily restricted and will struggle in the quagmire of failure. I have been thinking hard about why I have achieved nothing. Why can't I always do it well?

In fact, failure, failure and so on. Everything is just an experience, and infinity may be a kind of self-achievement.

It is not life that chooses you, but you choose life.

We always envy excellent people and wonder why they are so powerful. It seems that they are full of wings and have been making rapid progress. However, we never thought that we could actually become excellent.

There is a very good saying, "knowledge changes fate, cognition determines our future, because the radius of cognition determines our ability."

Therefore, when you want to be an excellent person, you can change your cognition and eliminate cognitive mistakes by studying and reading.

Because sober cognition can let us know what is good, what we are thinking and what we need, and then make the right choice.

In our daily life, we will inevitably encounter some things that violate our principles. When we meet them, if we just face them with the old model, we may collapse ourselves.

For example, when others have few comments, they are biased and mistakenly think that he is right.

And if we know what we are doing is right, let other people's comments go with the wind, we don't care. But to live your own life and choose the life you want.

Write it at the end

There is only one kind of heroism in life, and that is to love life after recognizing the truth of life.

In life, there are many problems that have no correct answers, and some problems can be easily solved because we never give up exploring the truth in our own life background.

In her new book Understanding: The Fearless Truth, Sister Han tells us how to be a true self, dare to be true and live in an imperfect world with real personal growth and frank and detached narration.

In this book, you can solve many problems you will encounter in your personal growth. For example:

How to gain more transparency after being hurt?

How to form an aura of not being hurt when bullied by the campus?

When denied, how to break the thick wall of denial and win affirmation?

If you want to know more exciting contents in the book, you need to pick up this book and read it carefully. Calm down in the book and gain the courage to face life.

Above. I hope you can find the bright spot in yourself, be your best self with confidence, and laugh at the hardships of life when facing the challenges of life.