Why do mom and dad always quarrel?

Why do mom and dad always quarrel? Quarrel is actually a very common phenomenon in our life. Basically all parents will quarrel, but there are actually many different solutions. Why do mom and dad always quarrel?

Why do mom and dad always quarrel 1? This is because there is a problem.

Maybe it's emotion;

Perhaps it is a family matter;

Or life;

Adjust your emotions.

Parents often quarrel, which may be a way for them to mediate contradictions in their lives in this way. We just need to adjust our emotions and make ourselves as little affected as possible.

Go away silently, no matter what.

If your mom and dad are always arguing about unimportant things, you can turn a blind eye and just walk away silently. You can comfort them after their quarrel.

Stay neutral.

When your parents quarrel, you should not deliberately help one of them quarrel with the other, just stay neutral.

Parents often quarrel, what influence and harm will it cause to their children?

1, children feel insecure: living in a family where parents often quarrel, children will become extremely insecure. They will worry about their parents' divorce, worry that they will be neglected in the future, face the threat of death in their hearts, and often feel fear in their hearts.

2, easy to make children grumpy: often living in a family environment where parents quarrel, children do not feel love, lack of communication and communication when things happen, which will make children grumpy and may often use force to solve problems.

But we all know that force can't solve the problem, it will only make the problem more serious, and even have unexpected consequences and tragedies.

3. Children are easy to rebel or even run away from home: whether in our life or on the Internet, we have seen many examples of children running away from home.

Most of the children who run away from home come from families that often quarrel.

In a family that often quarrels, children can't feel the warmth and love of their parents.

Living in such a family will only make children feel suffocated, so it is easy for children to run away from home because they want to escape and avoid this painful and suffocating environment.

4, children's academic performance decline: parents quarrel, children can not study with peace of mind because of fear, class will be uneasy, simply can not listen to the teacher's lectures, resulting in children's academic performance decline, resulting in a sense of disgust for learning.

5, extreme inferiority: Parents often quarrel, which will lead to children's lack of self-confidence and a feeling of extreme inferiority. Sometimes children will blame themselves, thinking that their parents quarrel because they are not good, which makes them look inferior in front of their classmates. He feels that he is inferior to others everywhere, and his interpersonal relationship will be hindered, which will affect his future work and life.

6. Affect children's views on marriage and love: Parents often quarrel, and children will have fear and distrust of marriage.

Xiaoguang is a handsome boy. Although I have worked for many years, I have never dared to fall in love or get married.

He said that he was very painful and scared when he saw his parents quarreling since he was a child.

Whenever mom and dad quarrel, he secretly swears in his heart that he will never fall in love again, never get married again, never hurt each other or hurt himself.

Later, one of his colleagues who had a good relationship with him realized his psychology and wanted to help him, so he called him home for dinner every weekend.

This colleague has a very good relationship with his wife. Every time Xiaoguang goes to their house to play, the couple will cook together, cook a good table and entertain Xiaoguang to eat and drink together.

Perhaps Xiaoguang was infected by this loving couple, and he also wanted to have such a warm and happy family atmosphere.

Later, he met a woman he could talk to, so he established a love relationship and entered marriage.

However, in the process of getting along with husband and wife, Xiaoguang's parents always quarrel, which leads him to never have confidence in his marriage.

This performance of Xiaoguang, over time, will always make his wife have some bad feelings, so after a short period of happiness, there was a rift between them, and the marriage gradually appeared disharmony, and later they divorced.

After the divorce, Xiaoguang has been single, and now he is over 40 years old. Xiaoguang has no idea of remarriage and may spend his life alone.

Write it at the end

In fact, the best parent-child relationship is that dad loves mom and mom loves the whole family. If you really love your children, love your other half.

When mom and dad have harmonious feelings, the family will be full of laughter and love. Mom and dad have a harmonious relationship, and there is warmth in the family to be happy and sweet.

Why do mom and dad always quarrel? Parents often quarrel in front of their children. What's the effect on their children?

1, affecting children's future marriage views.

If parents often quarrel in front of their children when they are young, they may think it's nothing, but children will look at it and watch their parents blush or even fight for a little thing all day.

When children grow up, they will be afraid of getting married, because they are afraid that they will become like their parents after marriage and dare not think about it. Therefore, children are too late to enter the marriage hall, preferring to be alone.

2, affect the child's personality

Parents often quarrel in front of their children, which will affect their character. Because sometimes parents will involve their emotions in their children, and the children will lie down for no reason. Every time children see their parents hysterical, they are particularly scared, and some even want to find a place to hide. Slowly, the child's courage is getting smaller and smaller in the quarrel between parents, and the child is becoming more and more unwilling to talk.

3. Give the child a psychological shadow.

Parents often quarrel in front of their children, which will leave a psychological shadow on them. The angry look of parents is printed in the child's mind and will not disappear.

Some children have nightmares when they see their parents quarreling during the day. What's more, every time a child sees a picture of a quarrel, he will be particularly nervous and afraid. If children argue with others when they grow up, they will tremble all over. Because the psychological shadow left by parents has always surrounded the children.

So parents should never quarrel in front of their children, no matter how big it is. If there is a real conflict between parents, parents should also avoid their children.

What should parents do to avoid hurting their children when they want to quarrel?

1, not in front of the children

If parents are really angry and can't control it, parents should not be in front of their children. Both parents can avoid their children and find a space where they can't see. Don't make too much noise and don't disturb the children. Don't come out until your parents' affairs are settled Moreover, after coming out, children can't see the changes of their parents' emotions.

2. Cold treatment on both sides

When parents want to quarrel, parents can choose to treat it coldly, and both sides will ignore anyone for the time being. When the child falls asleep or the child is not at home, parents will take things out to discuss. At this time, the parents' emotions have calmed down, and there will be no waves to solve the problem.

Don't leave your children alone.

Children are the most easily overlooked when parents quarrel. Some parents slam the door when they get angry and leave their children alone, which is the biggest harm to their children. So parents should stay away from their children when they quarrel, because it really scares them.

If parents don't want to hurt their children and leave a shadow on them, it's best not to quarrel, no matter when and where they have children. What's more, parents may forget it soon after quarreling, but children don't know that children will always remember their parents' state and even affect their lives.

So, if there are problems between parents, please live in peace. If you have any questions, let's discuss them together. Don't get angry easily. This will not only hurt the feelings between parents, but also hurt the atmosphere of the whole family. Moreover, it is easy for people to say some malicious words that hurt others in their emotions. It's easy to say these words, but it's not so easy to take them back!

Why do mom and dad always quarrel? Why do children always protect their mothers when they quarrel? There are three factors behind it.

Answer 1: by instinct.

In fact, the child's protection for the mother has been formed since the fetal period, and pregnant mothers can't eat it, fearing that their illness will bring risks to the baby. It turns out that after pregnancy, the chance of getting sick is greatly reduced.

This is because when the fetus develops in the mother's body, it will produce a special substance, which can not only protect the mother's heart, but also improve the resistance and help the mother's physical quality become stronger.

Moreover, from October of pregnancy to birth check-up, almost all of them are mainly mothers. The mother is the most familiar person to the child, so in the instinctive reaction, the child will choose to protect the mother at the first time.

Answer 2: the influence of dad's words and deeds

Dad's concern, love and tolerance for his mother in daily life will be seen by children, and he will learn to respect and love his mother like his father.

When he realized that his mother would be hurt, he immediately chose to protect him, even if the other party was his father.

Answer 3: I think my mother is weak.

In the eyes of children, compared with a strong father, the mother is weak and naturally gives birth to a desire to protect. My family is like this. If my father and I have an argument, the balance between my brother and sister will be biased in my favor. No matter who is right or wrong, they will choose to protect me first and give my father a reason: mom is so hard, can't you give up?

Behavioral influence of family background

Although children will choose to protect their mothers without hesitation, young parents are advised not to quarrel in front of their children, let alone pretend to test them. For a long time, his subconscious thought that it was dangerous for "dad to hit mom".

1, affecting the feelings of children and fathers.

Originally, dad spent less time with his children, so he would be closer to his mother. If there are often some "hands-on" or quarreling problems, children will be more alienated from their fathers subconsciously, affecting the feelings between father and son/father and daughter.

Tips: Children's growth can't be separated from their fathers' companionship and guidance. If it causes a knot, it is very unfavorable for the child's growth, so some behaviors should be cautious.

2. Children will form a violent way to solve problems.

When a child is very young, he subconsciously watches "Dad Beats Mom", and this picture will always exist in his mind.

One of my sister's kindergarten classmates often beats other children. Only after communicating with parents did I know that some parents' behaviors affected their children. When he meets some problems, he will think that "hands-on" can solve them.

Satya, a famous American family therapist, believes that a person is inextricably linked with his family, which may affect his life.

Therefore, parents should not easily try "slapstick" behavior in front of their children to test his reaction.

Three elements of cultivating excellent children

In fact, as long as children are actively cultivated, there is no need for temptation, and children will try their best to protect their mothers and other family members. But the premise needs parents to give them positive education and guidance.

Element 1: Cultivate children's sense of responsibility and responsibility.

I once saw this scene in the park: my son accidentally spilled potato chips all over the floor, and grandma had to help pick them up after seeing it. The mother stopped grandma's action and told the child, "This is your own business, you have to bear it yourself." .

This is a very small thing, but mothers are teaching their children to take responsibility and responsibility from small things. In a subtle way, children can be responsible for their actions and take care of their families.

Element 2: Set an example.

Educator Tao Xingzhi said: "I want my son to stand on his own feet, and I want to stand on my own feet." I want my son to help himself, and I want to help myself. "

Everyone knows that a child is a blank sheet of paper, and all his words and deeds are influenced by people around him, especially his parents. If parents can't control their words and deeds, then this influence will penetrate into their children's consciousness every day and be copied without reservation.

Tips: The influence of family background on children begins from birth. Parents' words and deeds will shape children's character, outlook on life and values.

Element 3: Parents' executive power

There are many families around me who love their children's education. Although I have repeatedly warned myself to educate my children well, I often give up because of insufficient execution.

Looking at many children's bad behaviors, they all come from the failure of family education. The failure of family education is not that parents don't understand education, let alone love their children, but that they love too much, which leads to connivance and problems in "execution".

Educating children depends more on the influence of parents than on temptation. Especially for younger children, they have no ability to distinguish right from wrong, and some tentative behaviors of their parents will have a great influence on their children.