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Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
The speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law are prone to contradictions, which have been difficult to solve since ancient times. So how should mother-in-law and daughter-in-law get along? In fact, a clever daughter-in-law can use some verbal skills to avoid conflicts. Let's share the speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law 1 speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
approve
We all know that elders and young people have different values, so there will be many conflicting ideas. The most common educational problems encountered by ordinary mothers always lead to the knot between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. When the opinions of the elders are different from yours, don't rush to leave, and don't bow your head and forbear. I suggest you agree with the opinions of your elders first. It's like "Mom, you're right" and "it's true" in words.
After approval, it is the highlight, but unconditional attachment to parliament is considered perfunctory, so try your best to make comments. For example, when asked by parents, why don't you have children? Answer: "but ... the economy doesn't allow it", "but ... we have other plans at present and have no time" and so on. Don't pretend to feel uncomfortable when asked, you will get better feedback by agreeing with the conversation you started.
Propose solution
Preparing for the exam requires review, and preparing for the debate on the stage requires preparation. If you want to convince your elders and gain recognition, you must of course have a practical plan. The relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is equal but not antagonistic. At this time, effective communication is very important. Abandon the preconceived idea that "the elders don't listen to me at all". Take choosing a kindergarten as an example. If you want the elders to agree with your choice, you must have the skills to prepare the plan.
If ABC has three choices now, you can accept all three choices at first, so that no matter which one you choose, there is not much loss, and the way of speaking is like giving a briefing to the chairman. Remember the options you want, polish them, and be a responsible salesman, so the chances of being selected by your elders will greatly increase. Give your elders the right to choose, and you will not only feel respect, but also save the trouble of disagreement.
A harmless lie
It is very important for a wife to adjust her mentality. Although it is said that after marriage, the two families are a family, and all mothers know it, the reality is not that simple. Remember that "mother-in-law is not a mother". This sentence is not to express the gap between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, but to pay more attention to words and deeds than parents.
If you live with your parents-in-law, whether you are at work or having dinner with friends, you must report your trip to them, so that your elders will feel respected and there will be no doubt: What is this daughter-in-law busy with every day? I don't know if I'm unhappy, but I will tell some white lies, such as wrapping red envelopes for the New Year. No matter whether the red envelopes are given together or separately, as long as they are given to parents-in-law, the husband will say that they are the daughter-in-law's wishes, and the woman will say that they are her husband's wishes. It is easier for husband and wife to help each other and integrate into each other's families.
Speaking skills between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law II. Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law taboo.
1, the vanity of mother-in-law
Everyone will like to listen to zan's kind words, which will make them very happy and comfortable. Old people, like children, have to be coaxed. Learn to praise her more in daily life, telling her that her mother looks much younger than her actual age, her home is really clean, and her cooking is delicious, which is beyond comparison. Just like this zan is beautiful, try to say more.
2. Call your husband
China has had the idea that men are superior to women since ancient times. You always tell your husband what to do, and your mother-in-law will be very uncomfortable. She feels that her son is oppressed by you and can't be the master of his own family, so she will have a sense of conflict in her heart. She can do whatever she wants where her mother-in-law can't see.
Step 3 make out with your husband
Just like being too intimate with her husband in front of outsiders is disrespectful to others, and it is even more taboo in front of her mother-in-law. My mother-in-law will think that my son was robbed by another woman, and she will be jealous. You must avoid her and close the door if you want to make out.
4. complain to your husband
If your mother-in-law complains to your husband, see if what she says makes sense. If it doesn't make sense, you guide your husband to mediate between them. Don't go against your mother-in-law, and your daughter-in-law shouldn't complain to her husband because of a little thing. Be more tolerant, so that your family will be harmonious and you will be happy.
What is the reason for the disharmony between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law
1, wife is too lazy
In the mother-in-law's view, in fact, the son married his daughter-in-law to share some housework properly, otherwise you think that with the so-called love, you can drink enough. After marriage, life is a little family, especially after having children, and more and more details need a careful and diligent daughter-in-law. First of all, don't say you are helping your mother-in-law, you are also one of her. There is nothing wrong with doing one thing on your own. Besides, my mother-in-law was also a daughter-in-law. They are all experienced people. If her nature is not too bad, in fact, no mother-in-law really likes swearing for no reason, right? And it is precisely because they are experienced people who know the difficulties of being a daughter-in-law, and it is even more impossible to deliberately embarrass their daughter-in-law (except those with psychological problems). In addition, don't many people think that a daughter-in-law should do housework diligently in exchange for her mother-in-law's favor?
2. Daughter-in-law doesn't respect her mother-in-law.
Why does the daughter-in-law not respect her mother-in-law? Although it has always been the fault of her mother-in-law to her daughter-in-law, her mother-in-law is not "black as a crow" and her mother-in-law is not unreasonable. Besides, who can rule out the situation that a daughter-in-law finds fault with her mother-in-law? Of course, what I'm talking about here mainly means that in normal communication, the daughter-in-law may not know how to speak. Young people are more straightforward and less experienced than their mother-in-law, and sometimes they may hurt their mother-in-law because of a rude word.
In fact, the best way to get along between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is to get along like mother and daughter. A woman is a mother's little cotton-padded jacket, so many friendly mother-in-law will treat her daughter-in-law as half a daughter, hoping to teach her more life experiences. Of course, if this is "consensual", it is naturally the best. If only her mother-in-law gives her strength, there may be contradictions because of her ignorance.
3. Lack of communication
This is extremely important in any kind of relationship. Husband and wife need communication, parents and children need communication, and mother-in-law and daughter-in-law should actually communicate more. There are two reasons. First, because of the distance between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, their living habits, interpersonal communication and life experience are different. As an elder, mother-in-law naturally wants her daughter-in-law to be close to herself, because in their eyes, her daughter-in-law is actually like her own child. Second, because the mother-in-law also needs to talk, some things can only be said to women. If the mother-in-law doesn't have a daughter, in fact, she usually chooses to talk to her daughter-in-law to reduce her psychological burden, especially when she is old. The son said that she can spend more time with her mother-in-law because of her busy work. If you treat your mother-in-law like your own, you will find that her mother-in-law is not so picky.
The daughter-in-law treats her mother-in-law as an outsider.
The war between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law has been staged for many centuries, and it is still a war without smoke. In the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, not only some mother-in-law treat her daughter-in-law as an outsider, but also some daughter-in-law treat her mother-in-law as an outsider. Otherwise, how can so many mother-in-law wander alone to make a living in her later years? When many people deal with their mother-in-law for their wronged daughter-in-law, in fact, their mother-in-law is also wronged. Because some daughters-in-law are possessive, they always feel that everything about their husbands is their own, and it has nothing to do with their mother-in-law. But daughters-in-law should know that your husband was brought up by her mother-in-law. How can they say that it has nothing to do with themselves? In fact, if the daughter-in-law can put herself in the other's shoes, what do you think it will be like for her son to listen to his wife and then ignore you after many years?
Three sentences will make the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law drop to freezing point.
At the same time, think about something when you say it. Many times you can hurt her inadvertently. If you want to improve the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I suggest you don't say these three words to your mother-in-law:
1, "Mom, you don't understand ..."
This is what young wives often say when dealing with housework or taking care of children. Maybe this is nothing in your eyes, but this kind of words hurt the old man's heart the most. Although she may not understand, it does not mean that she is incompetent and ignorant, nor does it affect her right to have her own son and grandson. But your "you don't understand" completely excluded her from the whole incident. In the eyes of your mother-in-law, you are telling her clearly: "If you don't know anything, don't get involved." To improve this relationship, I suggest you change this sentence to "Mom, please tell me ..."
2. "My baby ..."
Many mothers who love their children often say "how is my baby" in front of their mother-in-law. But once this kind of words is heard by her mother-in-law, it is likely to trigger a dispute between her mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law. My mother-in-law will whisper in her heart, "What is my son, is the baby still the great-grandson of my hometown?" . Therefore, although there is nothing wrong with this title of strong sense of belonging, it makes her mother-in-law feel a crisis. In order to avoid this contradiction between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, I suggest you change your words to "your grandson (your granddaughter) ..."
3. "Your mother ..."
For most daughter-in-law, it is almost impossible to regard her mother-in-law as her own mother. For example, after making a mistake, my mother-in-law will never tell you "what a silly child" like her mother. Therefore, many daughters-in-law often turn "how is your mother" into a spoken word when chatting with her husband. My mother-in-law must be very unhappy to hear you call her that. Therefore, as a daughter-in-law, it is best to call "our mother" more often to enhance the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.
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