Funny joke about your girlfriend?

Joke is an artistic language, taken from life. Therefore, it is easy to understand and always makes us laugh. It can add different colors to simple life and relieve daily stress. Next, I have carefully prepared for you. Welcome to watch!

* * * Hot articles * * *

1. The son asked his father, "Dad, how did you and your mother meet?" Dad: "Many years ago, your mother fell into the water and almost drowned. I happened to pass by and jumped into the water to save your mother because I could swim. " . Two months later, we got married. "Son" Dad, you are so brave. "Dad:" Son, you will never learn to swim in your life. "

2. You have the face of an angel, the figure of a devil, and even the posture of farting is so beautiful. But in public, can you control the rhythm?

3. One day, the company office needed to be stamped. Xiao Wang couldn't find the inkpad, so he asked his colleague, "Do you know where the inkpad is?" Colleague: "Southeast Asia".

During the negotiation, the foreign trader sneezed. Just as the translator sneezed, the manager said unhappily, "You don't need to translate, I understand."

5. Dancing is too tiring and singing is expensive, so it is better to get together with classmates, miss the campus flavor, avoid being single and heartbroken, and exchange information with each other.

6. A man's family has been poor since childhood. His mother made a rice bag, took off her pants in the bridal chamber at night, and his wife fainted on the spot. The front of * * * is impressively marked: net weight is 30 kg.

7. A beggar begged his hostess to say, Madam, I haven't seen meat for a whole week. The lady called the servant and quickly brought out a plate of meat pie for the man to see.

8. The wife goes out to follow, the wife orders obedience, and the wife makes mistakes and blindly follows; Wife waits for makeup, remembers birthdays, endures beatings and scolding, and is willing to spend money.

9. A little lion fairy flew over the grassland to catch passengers. Don't move. Mother lion scolded, didn't I always tell you? Don't joke about food!

10. 100 One day after the breakup, the girl sent a message to the boy: "I'll wait for you at the old place." Later, girls blew in Beihai all afternoon, and boys stayed in Super 8 for three days.

* * * Classic * * *

1. George wants to go to the bathroom. He was afraid that someone would steal his beer, so he wrote a note: I spit in the cup. He came back and found a sentence added to the paper: I threw up, too.

2. I once liked a girl who was young, with a little expectation and some helplessness. Although she is someone else's love, I hope she will always be lovely!

3. The young man farted, and the woman next to him put three bah, bah, bah! The young man asked unhurriedly, Comrade, why did you spit out the nuts when you ate fart?

4. If you want to have a happy day, drink more wine; If you want to be happy in January, you must find the feeling; If you want to be happy for a year, you must give up your troubles; If you want to be happy all your life, don't follow the new trend.

I am disgusted to see more and more * * actresses opening accounts on Sina Weibo. This is a group of Japanese who killed the most people in China, and their crimes are heinous!

6. Two frogs fell in love. After they got married, they gave birth to a clam. The male frog was furious and said, * * *. What happened? The mother frog cried and said, Dad, I had plastic surgery before I met you.

7. A friend asked the bat how he married a mouse. The bat has tears in his eyes, which is meaningful: alas! That day he * * *, powerful firepower, jumped on the ceiling and let him get his wish.

In the 1980s, fellow villagers met fellow villagers and went to sea to do business. In the 1990 s, when fellow villagers met fellow villagers, they lied to you without consulting; In the 2000 s, villagers met villagers and were busy with lawsuits.

9. During a military exercise, a shell accidentally fell into Gua Tian, and a soldier was sent to inspect it. A man in rags said with a sad face, this is not just stealing melons, but also peeling them.

10. Q: Recently, Mr. Guo finally surpassed Aoi sora in the number of fans. How does Mr. Guo feel about this? Degang Guo: The bald man is finally naked!

* * * Selected Articles * * *

1. A customer angrily ran into the tailor's shop, pointed to the fashion designed by the owner for him and said, "I was standing on the street corner yawning, and two messenger guys stuffed the letter into my mouth!"

2. Wife: I will get rid of the habit of swearing, so don't hit people easily, okay? Husband: OK, if you scold me again, I'll kill you! Wife: * * *! * * * Dare!

Wife: Boss, give my husband a bottle of rice wine. Boss: Is one bottle enough? Your husband is famous for his drinking. Wife: Drinking may not be enough, but smashing a bottle should be enough.

My little nephew was sick once. After he came back from the hospital, he kept crying and said, I want to be a turtle. Why did he become a turtle? Answer: The tortoise's shell is so big and hard that the needle can't get in.

A priest advised the poor to believe in religion. He asked a poor man, "Would you rather go to heaven or hell after death?" The poor man replied, "Alas! You see, where the corn flour is cheap, go there!

6. The father reprimanded his son: The neighbor was very unhappy because you broke his son's eyes. You said it was an accident. Is it true?/You don't say. The son said, of course it's true. I want to hit him on the nose.

When a country finds it difficult to recruit soldiers, it will post a notice saying that if it does military service, it will get a beautiful woman. An ugly woman stopped at the military station and said to the staff, excuse me, can a female soldier marry her husband?

8. A middle-aged man is buying a pair of trousers. He looked at it carefully and suddenly asked, does it look good on you? I only heard the salesgirl say angrily, Go home and ask your wife!

9. I can't eat in the morning because I miss you; I can't eat at noon because I miss you more; I can't eat at night because I miss you crazily; I can't sleep at night because ... I'm hungry.

10. When winter comes, men who go out to work will come back. She looked at the geese flying south in the sky and thought, Geese, Geese, those women waiting for men are actually the same name as you: migratory birds.