What do you mean by "sour when you can't eat grapes"?

"If you can't eat grapes, you say that grapes are sour" is the "sour grape effect", which means that when you feel depressed because your real needs are not met, in order to alleviate your inner anxiety, you make up some "reasons" to comfort yourself, so as to eliminate tension, relieve stress, free yourself from negative psychological states such as dissatisfaction and anxiety, and protect yourself from harm.

Sour grape effect

The story in Aesop's fable "sour grapes" is well known: the fox wants to eat grapes, but because the grapes are too high to eat, they say that the grapes are sour and there is nothing delicious. In psychology, taking this as an example, individuals often belittle their goals and say that they are not worth pursuing in order to dilute their inner anxiety, which is called the "sour grapes" mechanism or the "sour grapes" effect. On the contrary, some people can't eat grapes, only lemons, so they say lemons are sweet. This psychological phenomenon is called the "sweet lemon" mechanism. It doesn't mean that the goals you can't reach or the things you can't get are bad, but it emphasizes that all the lower goals you have are good, so as to alleviate your inner loss and pain.

"Sour grapes" and "sweet lemons" are common psychological phenomena in daily life. It is a typical manifestation of psychological rationalization. It means that the individual's behavior does not meet the social value standard or fails to achieve the pursued goal. In order to reduce or avoid the anxiety caused by frustration and maintain self-esteem, he gave a reasonable explanation for his unreasonable behavior in order to accept the reality.