I don't deserve to talk about it.

I should be very happy to see myself lose weight and get better skin, but what I have done and said these days makes me excited.

The two biggest failures of 20 19 are the failure of starting a business and the self-righteous pursuit of the person you like. In the face of such myself, I don't feel sorry, but sad! I still don't understand what kind of psychology a man needs to be so "good to me".

I like him. He knows I like him. To what extent? When starting a business failed, I owed hundreds of thousands, I didn't know where to go, I was extremely depressed, and I wanted to stand up again and try again. He needed help, too, so I gave up my job and worked for him. I enjoyed it. You can call me stupid, because there are more stupid behaviors. But during this time, he asked me for a meal every day. I'm not happy that he will coax me. The voice is one day, he likes to call himself dad, and so on. I am immersed in this kind of happiness myself. My best friend said she liked me, and I told her to wait until the work was finished. Maybe he just did it because I wanted to work for him. After work, maybe because he thanked me, he still treated me like that, so I thought he liked me, so I stepped on the plane to find him!

The night before I boarded the plane, I was very nervous. I was afraid that he wouldn't want me to go and I was afraid that I would be rejected again. I really wanted to test whether he was expecting me, but at that time, my professional knowledge was mixed with too many personal feelings, so I couldn't judge! So I had a series of messy conversations with him, and he didn't come to pick me up the next day naively. Can you imagine getting up at four o'clock to catch a plane, flying to another city in a daze with joy, and taking a taxi until he was disappointed and waited in the cold wind for more than ten minutes?

I won't say much in the next few days. The important thing is that we talked all night at my compulsion. He thinks it's a friend's behavior to order takeout for me every day, good morning and good night every day. Don't like it, don't like it? Nani? Am I romantic again? The next morning, for various reasons, he didn't come. He and I talked a lot, including his ex-girlfriend, and almost all talked about getting married. What he said suddenly made me sick. Yes, it's really disgusting. The picture of my brain filling makes me really sick. Then I went back to Xi 'an!

At the moment I arrived in Xi 'an, I looked at the blue sky and white clouds and smiled with relief, which was more relaxed than ever! You think this is over, don't you? I thought he would disappear from my world!

However, later, I forgot when and how to start. We are the same as before, and he is still so kind to me. During the epidemic, we share happy or unhappy things together like friends! I always tell myself that we are not friends! I told myself that I don't like him! I told myself that I can't be with people who don't like me! I seem to be deceiving myself again. ......

I don't know why it is so difficult for me to stop loss in time. Wait for someone who is kind to you because you are kind to him rather than like you, and treat you just to avoid being too ashamed of this good person, until one day he finds out that he actually likes you? Girl, wash and sleep! Feelings are not to be talked about or traded. What hormonal love do you play when you are old?

Brother, you are very good, but I am too humble to have the sacred "feeling" of wanting to have you!

If you are unfortunate enough to see my messy articles, please wake me up in the comments section!