NLP first-stage recovery

202 1 Mid-April, I studied the first course in China NLP University (Changsha) for four days. Thanks to Haiping Guo's wonderful lecture, I resumed my course after studying for nearly a month. Many of them seem to have forgotten, and many of them seem to have become subconscious. I will dig and summarize from the following aspects:

NLPNLP, N- nerve, l- language, P- programming program. Translated into Chinese is Richard's Psychosomatic Language Programming? Bender and John? Gerlind * * * founded together.

Starting with cracking the language and thinking patterns of successful people, they creatively decoded their thinking patterns, found the laws behind human thoughts, emotions and behaviors, and reduced them to a set of replicable and imitative programs.

NLP has created several ways to interpret thinking codes. These skills include belief change, sensory adjustment, the use of secondary sensory elements, post-language model, timeline, communication strategy, heart anchor, interaction management between mind and body system, understanding level, perceived position, twelve presuppositions, frame transformation, etc., all of which are methods to study people's internal system.

NLP is a comprehensive knowledge, which combines the knowledge of Bowles Gestalt Psychology, Satya Family Therapy, Eriksson Strategist Hypnosis, batson Communication, etc., and creates uniqueness that none of them have.

NLP studies how an individual's thinking determines a person's life!

1, no two people are the same;

2. One person cannot change another person;

3. Effective utilization is more important than significance;

4. We just live in a subjective world shaped by our own sensory experience;

5. The meaning of communication depends on the other party's response;

6, repeating the old practice will only get the old results;

7. There are at least three solutions to everything;

8. Everyone chooses the behavior that gives them the best interests;

9. Everyone has the resources to make himself successful and happy;

10, in any system, the most flexible part can influence the whole situation most;

1 1, no frustration, only feedback;

12, every action has its positive motivation behind it!

1) Zhong Zheng: Take abdominal breathing, focus on a certain part of the body or scan the body, tell yourself that I am here, focus on the center of the chest, tell yourself that I am open, focus on the center of the head, and tell myself that I am clear.

2) Being present: I understand that everything I think and see is in the present, right beside me, and I can do this. As the Buddhist said, when I carry water, I am carrying water, and when I burn firewood, I am cooking, not thinking, but I am not here. To achieve this state, my mind must be focused, attentive, keen and insightful.

3) Reflexivity: My understanding is that I can see the emotion behind the emotion, which is the root of the current emotion.

There are three things in the world, their own, their own care and responsibility, others', respect and acceptance, God's, and coordination and adjustment.

In class, the teacher asked two people to play a game in pairs, and one person imitated the actions of the other person opposite. We come to the conclusion that if your eyes closely follow the hand of the opposite person, you will find it difficult to keep up, but if you open your eyes and don't focus on a certain point, it will be easier to keep up. This is peripheral vision! If we keep a close eye on this point, we will look carefully, but if we want to take care of a lot, we can use the method of peripheral vision. Just like we play basketball, we should make more use of peripheral vision, so that you can observe and pay attention to a wider range.

This also reminds me of the image reading method I learned before. Instead of focusing on a certain line of words, I can see the whole text at a glance like a photo, and use the memory function of the right brain to form a whole memory. After I am impressed, I will catch up with reading and understanding. The combination of the left and right brains can quickly learn and improve my memory!

Besides, we played another game. In a mess of numbers, let's count the numbers we want as soon as possible As a result, we counted the figures that we were concerned about, but after asking questions, we found that we couldn't remember whether other figures appeared or not. The experiment tells us where the focus of our attention is and what we see, so we can think about whether we usually look at children and lovers in life and see good places or bad places in design.

Therefore, there is a good way to change the focus, which is the 5R success method:

1) refocus: focus.

2) Redefining meaning: Redefining the meaning of things or behaviors, such as smoking, may have been given masculine meaning before, and the re-given meaning is harmful to health.

3) Relocation: If you smoke, if you want to quit smoking, list the bad aspects above 10.

4) Reorganization: Re-adjust the original process elements.

5) Reorder orders

Establishing affinity includes three levels: 7% written expression, 38% pronunciation and intonation, and 55% body language, so we should pay more attention to the latter two levels. If a sentence with a bad literal meaning is said with a smile and happiness, it is estimated that the other party will not feel very picky.

Affinity includes three types: quick affinity, instant affinity and deep affinity:

1, quick affinity, usually within 4 seconds, including looking at each other's eyes, smiling, shaking hands and calling each other's names. I often run in the morning and always meet Sister Mei in the same neighborhood. Every time I meet her, I just wave. When I met her that morning, I shouted "Good morning, Sister Mei" and she immediately smiled back at me.

2, instant affinity, that is, the above text language, limbs, etc.

3. Deep affinity: mainly at the level of consciousness. If the two people who meet establish a deep trust, communication will be smooth.

Communication is neither control nor command. To avoid the killer word "but, but, that is, should", use a unified language structure "yes, I understand … at the same time …".

Imitation is the most effective way to approach the other party in communication, which makes the other party feel very familiar and friendly, including imitating the other party's speech, tone, speech speed, body language and expression. In the process of imitation, we should put ourselves in the same shoes and persevere, and many things will be solved.

I once had such a case: one day I had Chinese food in a restaurant with my wife and children and ordered a diced pepper chicken. When I first entered, I felt that the taste was not very authentic. Some chicken pieces are big, others are small. Pick up a big piece, it tastes strange, it seems to be undercooked. When I opened the bigger piece on the plate, it was still raw. I was angry at once, but my subconscious told me to be cold and clean. Look at the counter. After a while, I called the lady at the counter who looked like a manager or boss, calmly pointed to the meat and told her the situation. She immediately shouted, "This is really outrageous. They are in a hurry and can't do this anymore. " I suddenly feel much better. The manager still felt the same way, and then she said, "I told them to be careful, this dish is going to quarrel again." "No need."

1)BVR

That is, the first letters of English words such as faith, value and rules.

2) Laws and regulations

Rules, that is, how things are arranged and handled, depend on our inner beliefs or values.

3) Faith

Subjective judgment on what things should be, the key stages of belief formation: imprinting period (0-7 years old), imitation period (8- 13 years old) and social period (14-2 1 year old); The way of belief formation comes from past personal experience, observation of others' experience, indoctrination of trusted people and summary of self-thinking. Restrictive beliefs (viral ideas) need to be broken:

1) Helpless, I am the victim;

2) hopeless, impossible, I am not allowed to succeed;

3) worthless, unworthy, unqualified, I don't deserve success or happiness.

Breaking the restrictive belief skills-breaking the rules, breaking the supposed, trusting mentality (this is your responsibility), there is no way (there are always more than three solutions to everything).

4) Value

The meaning of things and the benefits gained from them. If you want to like something, you can give it more than seven good meanings, preferably 10 or more. How to push a person? Find out the value he cares about, create, increase or transfer. For example, the values that children care about are mysterious, novel, unexpected, changeable, fast-paced, exciting, challenging, competitive, helping others, being affirmed and so on.

What the hell do I want? This is a lifelong subject. Health, career, happiness, freedom, wealth, etc. We think in sequence with the left brain and the right brain respectively, and suppose that from now until the last day, life is only 20 years, 5 years, 1 year, 1 month. Have your most important values changed? When we are at our own memorial service, suppose we look at our body lying in the coffin and give ourselves a eulogy, how will we evaluate our life? Maybe at this time, I really want to know what value I really pursue. This is death meditation.

1, a gradual withdrawal method-eliminating negative emotions

This technique can only deal with one thing at a time, eliminating or reducing some negative emotions caused by something.

2. High self-worth anchor

Heart anchor: whenever a person enters a combined and intense state, if someone (or himself) carries out some stimulating behavior at the peak of his experience, this experience and stimulation will be combined, such as touching a specific point on the back of his hand when he is particularly excited, and you can also touch this characteristic place when you usually want to be excited.

High-value heart anchor is to establish three groups of joint heart anchors: self-confidence, self-love and self-esteem.

3. Secondary sensory elements will change their preferences.

Change one's preferences through the replacement of secondary sensory elements, and produce feelings of like or dislike for something, such as visual images, smell, hearing and so on.

The first phase of homework, homework for students to watch six movies, movies from life, after learning NLP, gave us deeper thinking:

1, the life of abandoned pine nuts?

Although Matsuko had some unpleasant experiences in the process of growing up, he became a respected teacher through his own efforts. With the pursuit of Gao Fushuai, the road of life should be getting better and better. However, because of a troublesome responsibility that they should not bear, life has been ups and downs since then, but they still have a trace of goodwill and hope. Even if the dragon hurts her again and again, he is still willing to wait for him. But as long as Long Yi confirms that he wants to be with her, he will only continue to hurt her and avoid pine nuts after he is released from prison. Looking at Matsuko's life, is it fate? When the teacher found out that Longyi was stealing, pine nuts seemed to be doomed to the end of development. Why did pine nuts inexplicably take the responsibility they shouldn't have, and then got along with others and resigned? From the source, it can be traced back to her childhood. At home, her father always takes special care of her sick sister, and buys gifts only for her sister. In fact, she has been trying to get her father's approval. Her father's only smile was when he made faces at the circus. Pine nuts have always lacked fatherly love and always felt that they should take on more responsibilities. Later, she got along with others in several relationships. The fate of pine nuts was not so much fate as the automatic reaction mode stored in their bodies. This model is extremely stubborn. If it doesn't break, it will really become fate. However, it is not impossible to break the game. Pine nuts should learn NLP and Satya.

2. "Life remote control"?

The hero of the story originally had a beautiful family, a beautiful and virtuous wife, a lovely son and a little daughter. However, his heart is only focused on one thing, becoming a partner and making big money. The boss ordered a task, but he dared not refuse to take it. If he keeps working overtime, he will cancel his promised family trip, make a bookstore for the children, watch the children's swimming competition and so on. And called the boss all the time during the whole family dinner. Finally, I had an argument with a group of children playing next to me. The family dinner broke up in discord, and the tenderness between husband and wife was even more aggressive. There are constant complaints at home and mistakes in work. The boss is becoming more and more dissatisfied. It can be said that life is a chicken feather. At this time, the protagonist accidentally got a remote control from Modi (angel) that can pause, fast forward and rewind his life. The protagonist didn't believe it at first, but later used it. When you encounter something you have done badly, take a step back and start again or fast forward, so that you can talk about a big order that is appreciated by your boss. All this made me feel beautiful at first, but I always felt that there was something wrong. Later, there was some automation, including when I had sex with my lover, she didn't feel anything! Later, he soon saw that he was old and his children were fat. What's more sad is that his ex-wife no longer belongs to him, and he doesn't know that his father has left. He saw what he had done through the pause of fast forward and fast backward, including his indifference to his father, and he regretted it. He felt that the remote control didn't bring him good luck, and he would throw it away when he returned to the child's wedding. The most touching scene of the story is that at the moment when his child was leaving for work after his honeymoon, the hero ignored the doctor's stop and tried his best to catch up with the child's car in the heavy rain and fell down in the distance of tens of meters. Fortunately, the child inadvertently turned to see him. With his last strength, he said the words "family first" to his children and beautiful daughter-in-law. I couldn't help crying at the end of the movie. What is a man's life pursuit? Doing a good job and making money is nothing more than a happier family life. Putting the cart before the horse can't be achieved, and in the end, nothing can be achieved. There can't be a remote control in life. If you want to return it, everything you have said and done will leave traces, which may be good or bad. The more bad the accumulation, it will eventually break out.

3. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder?

The hero on TV used to be bohemian, constantly pursuing beautiful girls and being harsh. The beautiful woman living next door tried to catch up but didn't catch up, which was very painful. Later, they met Tony Robbins, a psychologist, in the elevator, which just broke down. It was this encounter that opened a good play for the protagonist. Robbins made a "psychological skill" for the hero. A woman's virtue replaced beauty, and later she met a fat girl with a very kind heart. However, the hero is considered to be a peerless beauty. It happened that her daughter's father designed the big boss of the hero's company, and the hero stepped onto the peak of his life. However, when he met his pig teammate and wanted to help him understand the reality, he found Robbins to help him break the "curse". At this moment, his heart is very contradictory. After all, his girlfriend really "can't bear to look straight", and there are some misunderstandings in the middle girlfriend, but in the end, his emotions overcame the thinking of the lower body and bravely appeared at her charity farewell party in Africa. What does this story inspire? Changing secondary sensory elements can change preferences? There is also what you care about, what you see, and the kind people you see are the most beautiful.

4. Matrix 1

Movies seem illusory and objective, and people will live in their own thinking frame. In the movie, all human beings will be in the virtual matrix created by aliens, and they will live in a controlled program arrangement. The hero is a wise man among mankind, and he vaguely feels wrong. Under the guidance of leader Murphy, he found his mission and broke the virtual matrix controlled by aliens. In the play, a person's brain can be freely implanted with some kind of program, so that he can enter some environment that feels very real, and even master some skills. The protagonist suddenly becomes a taekwondo master, and at the same time, under the condition of constant hypnosis and believing that he is fast enough, even bullets can be dodged. The scene in the play seems absurd, but perhaps with the development of brain science and artificial intelligence in the future, human beings can really do this. For unpleasant memories, you can implant a program to eliminate them, or you can implant a special skill or a warm and happy memory. So, isn't human being happy every day? How nice!

5. Spice Girls at the Bottom?

Kudo Sayega, who is studying in a girls' high school in Nagoya, is a fashionable, sweet and lovely girl. She wears heavy makeup every day, plays with friends in the dark, and doesn't care about her studies at all, so her academic performance has long been the last in the whole grade. Shayega gave up on himself, feeling that he was stupid anyway, and wasted his precious youth that he could never start over. Later, my mother sent her to a cram school and met teacher Hirata. Hirata is a good teacher who inspires students' potential. She always encourages them to move forward, believing that they can do it and anything is possible. She also made a guarantee for Shayega to be admitted to the prestigious Keio University within one year. Since then, Shayega has worked hard, and of course there have been several setbacks. Teacher Hirata has helped her through the difficulties, especially when Shayega worked hard for a year and saw that the achievement gap was still very slim. In the end, Shayega was admitted to Keio University as she wished. In the process of this effort, family relations have become more and more harmonious. The relationship between dad and Shayega began to be reconciled, and the dream was no longer imposed on his son. My son chose his own path, and Hayega's behavior also changed another "stubborn" teenager of the same age in the cram school! There are many tears in this play. The most terrible thing is to lose dreams and hopes and lose confidence. If you can't wake up, you may fall into a quagmire. To get out of the quagmire, you need the courage to keep acting. Even in difficult times, you must be full of hope. Anything is possible!

6. Cheating

The film tells the story of Phil, a weather announcer, who was caught in a snowstorm during a mission, and stayed on February 2nd forever but couldn't walk any more, starting his repeated life story. Phil himself is a guy who likes complaining and arrogance. He is dissatisfied with the people around him, and so are his colleagues. I wake up at six o'clock every morning in the town and see the same people and scenes. Time is always this day. At first, Phil was depressed and staged all kinds of practical jokes. Later, he found that it was also beneficial, so he took advantage of this opportunity to do something, such as getting close to his favorite colleague Rita. After numerous rejections, he is determined to accept and enjoy this life, sincerely greet people around him every day, help those in need around him, and learn piano and sculpture himself. I also met most people in the town. One day, he started a wonderful day, with energetic live broadcast, perfect snow sculpture, and many people greeted him at the dance. Rita was moved by him that night and spent a wonderful evening with him. When he woke up in the morning, he felt the people around him. He finally waited until tomorrow! Feeling: If there is a fate, it is better to enjoy it, seize every day and live the present. Maybe fate will change!