Any funny jokes?

Joke: 1

No matter how cold the weather is, don’t persuade your girlfriend to wear more clothes. It’s useless, because for most girls, being beautiful is far more important than keeping warm. Therefore, what you have to do is not to persuade her to wear more clothes, but to wear more clothes yourself. When she says she is cold, then silently take off one piece for her to wear...

2

I dreamed of taking the college entrance examination, and the Education Bureau was doing an event. A score of 500 or more in the college entrance examination would be reduced by 300. I scored 499 and became the top scorer.

3

Laziness is a good excuse, as if you are diligent and you can really accomplish great things. Being fat is also a good excuse, as if you are thin, you can really achieve a lot. Just as good-looking as not wanting to fall in love is also a good excuse. It’s as if someone will really like you if you want to fall in love

4

To this day, I have three points about filling out my application for the college entrance examination. Suggestions: 1. Do not fill in the journalism major. This industry is dying. When spring returns one day, you will still be capable even if you don’t learn. I am an example, old man;

2. If you can study science and engineering, don’t study liberal arts. It is difficult to find a job and make a fortune in literature, history and philosophy. It is difficult to get promoted, and I am an example;

3. Try to avoid majors that artificial intelligence can replace, such as translation, journalism, etc., I am an example.

5

Attended a wedding ceremony yesterday.

The master of ceremonies asked the two newcomers: Who will hold the financial power in the future.

The newcomers said in unison: Me.

The emcee then said: The debut question will test you, and whoever answers it best will get it.

First of all, give the groom a question: One pound of cucumbers costs one yuan and eighty, and five pounds and four taels how much. When the time comes, the groom does not know.

Ask the bride: One pound of tomatoes costs one yuan, how much does two pounds cost?

Bride: Two dollars.