Humorous copy

1. Butterfly says to the ant: You are so boring that you will never find a girlfriend. Have you considered the future (queen ant)? The ant said: I thought about it, but the queen ant despises me.

2. A roommate asked: If you put a piece of shit and a bone in front of the dog, which one would the dog like? A funny roommate replied rationally: dogs can eat bones stained with shit.

3. In a Chinese exam, I asked an author what school he went to. I really won't just fill in the Wu Tang gang. Later, the teacher said that a classmate didn't answer this question well and wanted to invite parents. I thought I was dead. As a result, my deskmate was invited by my parents because he filled in: egg yolk pie!

4. An intern nurse drew my blood and stuck needles in my arm several times, but no blood vessels were found. But this little girl is so calm and serious, and she has the meaning of stabbing blood vessels and not giving up. After a dozen stitches, I endured severe pain and asked the little nurse in awe: Did you learn this stitch from Sister Rong?

5. There is a boy girlfriend in the dormitory who is darker. One night, he dated his girlfriend in the school Woods and kissed under the tree. Afterwards, I went back to the dormitory and found that there was a lot of food on the table, so I ate happily. At this time, the person in charge of the room came over and said slowly, Brother, if you have any difficulties, just let me know. I just saw it in the study hall. You are holding a tree and gnawing at the bark!

6. I'm 30 years old and I'm not married. My parents were in a hurry, so I bought a photo of Xifeng and said to them, You forced me to get married. Now that this woman is willing, do I have to marry? Mom answered the phone and said, Pretty handsome girl! It suits you very well.

7. A couple had an accident. The husband is fine, but the wife is seriously injured and facing death. The husband sat on his wife's bedside, holding her hand, and her body kept twitching and said, can you ... promise me ... one thing? My husband looked up and said with difficulty, Anyway, I promise you unconditionally. Wife: Can you ... Can't you ... Don't smile so happily.

8. Today, when I was correcting my paper, I came across a blank sheet of paper that said: It's too difficult, I have to hand in a blank sheet of paper. Then I habitually turned upside down. As a result, there was another sentence on the opposite side: Teacher, you are too naughty. You say this is a blank sheet of paper, turn it over!

9. In the evening, my mother and I went to the grain store to buy eggs. There is only one light bulb in the shop, which is very dark. I saw a big sack with khaki and green raisins in front of the shop. I said, this raisin is good! Then I grabbed two and put them to my mouth. This raisin is hard and a little salty. Say, is this raisin bad? Why is it hard and salty? The boss said, hurry up, that's cat food. ...

10. Classmates and mothers are good families and won't quarrel. Listen to my classmates and occasionally watch her check some quarrelling words, swearing words, how to swear gracefully, how to avoid swearing … and then find a small notebook to write it down. Now when her classmates make her angry, she puts on her glasses and turns out her notebook to scold one by one. ...

1 1. A sister told me today that she was unemployed. I asked: Why were you fired? "Sister replied: They think I am fat. I feel wronged for my sister: this is discrimination. You can sue them. Where do you work and what do you do? " Sister: I stepped on my back in the massage parlor.

12. After having a boyfriend, my father said to me: Daughter, my father has nothing to teach you! Now let me tell you where men hide their private money. It's amazing, winter clothes, dictionaries that are not commonly used, and even the handle of mop. Then my father said to me meaningfully: after you get married, don't turn over these places. You are too thin. If your husband turns against you, you can't beat him ... (China's best father-in-law)