Joke Collection Website - Talk about mood - Very funny humor. Tell me about it.
Very funny humor. Tell me about it.
1. threshold, the past is a door, and the past is a hurdle.
No one told you that you are cruel and innocent, sorry for the people and the party.
If you want to live a decent life, you must start greening from scratch.
Didn't you see me turn a blind eye? What do you think I'm doing?
The moonlight was bright in front of the window, and a bowl of soup was spilled on the ground. Raise your head with a towel, but lower your head to wipe your crotch.
6. In fact, men; What I hate most is mistress I like mistresses best!
7. I have been chasing Cupid's arrow, but you are flying in a bulletproof vest.
8. I will always hold you in my hand and finally close my palm. I can't stop you!
9. People have to do five things in their life, that is, eat, drink, pull, disperse and sleep.
10. If the boss uses you, you are a talent. If you don't, you will be laid off.
1 1. Verify a lie and you will get a lie.
12. If you make money, don't use it to wipe your ass.
13. The gifted scholars who studied by themselves last night expect female ghosts, while the single old men expect their aunts.
14. tease me, or I will be indecent.
15. Altman counts a ball, and Pig Bajie is the cutest.
16. With the reform and opening up, my weight rubbed off on the ground.
17. You don't have to talk, I know everything. You want to say I'm beautiful?
18. It's better to be drunk and make him feel bad than not to drink.
19. In this era, Wukong pursues leopard fashion and sexy.
20. bag! I count the stars. Your IQ is similar. Count the moon.
2 1. In this era, Wukong pursues leopard fashion and sexy.
22. Obama ~ ~, this is Clinton!
I really don't want to say that you are looking forward to the scene of the accident.
24. Are you a Pacific policeman? That's a pretty big tube.
25. Watch that conversation every day. The corners of the mouth unconsciously rise.
26. Neodymium people really can't care too much about men, so he will be like a mad dog.
27. Choosing the lightest troubles can explain the ups and downs of life.
28. You are still the same, still the same, subverting my joys and sorrows.
Tell me something interesting with a sense of humor.
Breaking brings happiness. You can stop despair.
We two idiots can piece together a genius.
If you have nothing to offer, you will steal it.
Life is nothing more than smiling at others and then making them smile!
In fact, I am really a devoted person. But people always say I'm a playboy.
Men use Dabao, and women use Hushubao.
You can say sorry. But I won't say nothing.
The early bird has breakfast, and the late bird has dinner.
I'm not married. I'm happy.
Even if I don't miss anyone, it's a lonely comfort to squat down and hug myself.
Yes, pay Spider-Man-just use the exterminator.
Give me another push. I will feed you Sanlu.
Today's dress is strange to me.
Don't think that every man is as easygoing as Nicholas Tse.
Opportunity is like a virgin, it is rare, only once.
What are the bad guys, men who take off their pants during the day and women who don't take off their makeup at night?
Chopin, no matter how awesome B is, can't play the sadness of labor and capital.
The water is bright and sunny, and the mountains are cloudy and rainy.
The deaf heard the dumb say that the blind saw a ghost.
I suggest that Japanese women be arrested and put into our male prison.
Flat chest and Jiaojiao are both national and provincial fabrics.
I'm sorry my heartbreak stained your place.
I don't swear. Because I have better hands-on ability.
I shaved my head just to win your smile!
Girl in front, your third button is undone.
I get dizzy when I'm on the boat. How can I have two feet on both sides?
I enjoy a moment's blank in my mind every day, and my thoughts are relatively simple.
Going to bars by bike should save money. It should cost money.
Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it.
Others have a lot of background, but I only have a back.
Apprentices who don't want to betray their teachers are incompetent apprentices.
When you are unhappy, you take a needle to the supermarket to poke a condom.
God gave me a task to take a snail for a walk.
We walked so fast that our souls couldn't keep up.
You have a post-80s heart and a post-70s face.
Snoopy told me that underwear was invented by Edison.
Please don't challenge Tencent's blacklist with personality.
Being pregnant is like being pregnant. It takes a long time for people to see it.
Others have a lot of background, but I only have a back.
Apprentices who don't want to betray their teachers are incompetent apprentices.
When you are unhappy, you take a needle to the supermarket to poke a condom.
God gave me a task to take a snail for a walk.
We walked so fast that our souls couldn't keep up.
Eating KFC and drinking Erguotou is the ninth wonder in the world.
Honey, don't let me go shopping alone in the future.
You are my Youlemei so that I can throw you away after drinking.
Very talented humor. Tell me about 2020.
Others are a landscape in our eyes, and we are also a landscape in others' eyes. But everyone is not a landscape for themselves. On the contrary, it may just be a pile of ruins. The ruins in the distance are regarded as scenery by us, which is the illusion caused by distance.
Very talented humor. Tell me about the latest 20xx.
First, all unforgettable love is the moment when the soul is free in bed!
Second, the night gave me a black mouse, but I played with it until dawn.
Third, MM buckle signature: covered in a big man, very hot.
Fourth, hugging is really a strange thing. It is so close, but you can't see each other's faces.
I really don't want to despise you with my toes. But, man, you made me do it.
I don't envy her for being more beautiful than me. I don't envy her being richer than me. What I envy is that she has you around her. . .
Seven, my son, must be as smart as I am, as soon as he teaches, he will pass in a short while, and he will be fine in a short while.
Eight, it is necessary to change the notebook. It takes minutes to boot, and the battery only supports minutes!
Nine, two people's love, how can a person harvest.
Ten, grandstanding can be pleasing or falling out of favor.
Eleven, the son is not obedient, you can fight properly, otherwise you can't show the majesty of Laozi. This is the case in Taiwan Province Province.
Twelve, every day, I will draw a circle on the calendar. On Sunday, I found that my life had become an ellipsis.
Thirteen, everyone is trying to live and live well. It is said that/kloc-all the medical expenses of the elderly over 0/8 years old have been reimbursed.
Fourteen, DOTA ruined his life, and Warcraft was poor for three generations. If you don't touch these two, you will become Gao Fushuai.
15. Gorgeous dissolution is precipitated in the shadow of prosperity and reality.
Sixteen, humble abode, live timid, very angry.
17. Bed rest is the minimum respect for holidays.
Eighteen, I will walk until the water blocks my way, I am thirsty; Then sit and watch the rising clouds, dizzy.
Nineteen, both house and rot, the future is uncertain.
Twenty, the east rises and the west falls, and the teacher is ruthless and I have feelings.
2 1. Look at you! Looking at the back, I was anxious and turned my head to scare away millions of lions.
The so-called surprise is that the rabbit you are waiting for comes, followed by the wolf!
Twenty-three, born down and out, five elements are short of money.
24. A good horse never turns back, so I never turn around and walk in circles. As a result, I met the grass again
Twenty-five, with what to kill you, my love.
Twenty-six, telling lies will always be exposed, and wearing wigs will always be exposed by the wind.
I am an angel, because of my weight, I can't go back to heaven.
Wow, it's hot! B: What's hot? A: Water. B: Take your time. Answer: foot washing water.
Twenty-nine, you have feelings and I have desires. As soon as the light is turned off, I will leave. . .
There are many ancient love stories and many contemporary love accidents.
I don't usually dump ugly girls, but you are an exception.
Thirty-two, Wukong, there is not enough firewood. Bring more scriptures. Jason Wu, go and see if Bajie is ripe.
Thirty-three, low-key to high-profile
Why are all the handsome guys in the barber shop and all the beautiful women in the red light district?
35. If I don't love you, how can I hurt you so thoroughly?
36. The biggest church in the world can't tolerate your sins.
It is said that women are like clothes and brothers are like brothers. In retrospect, I actually streaked for too many years as a chef!
38. If a man doesn't help you put on a wedding dress, you can give him a cassock.
Thirty-nine, no one is holding hands, so I just take a ride.
Forty, your mother is your father's cousin?
Forty-one, you said you would love me for life. I was so stupid that I forgot to ask: This life or the next life.
Forty-two, others pretend, I have to pretend to be experienced.
I don't care whether you brush your teeth or not, but tell me where my facial cleanser is!
Forty-four, spur yourself and spur others.
Forty-five, watching TV yesterday said that smoking caused sudden death, which scared my heart! I bite my teeth and stomp my feet to make up my mind! Don't watch TV again.
Forty-six, living in a humble abode, living a timid life and being very angry.
47. If pigs can fly, who will buy a plane? Ride a pig to heaven.
Forty-eight, if I become emperor, I will make you a prince!
I don't like sleeping with a woman many times, but I like sleeping with many women only once.
50. I made a mistake, so forget it. It's over anyway.
Lao Tzu not only has a car, but also depends on himself.
52. Don't treat shrimp as seafood.
My future is not a dream, but a nightmare.
I have the ability to pick up girls, but I am a girl.
Fifty-five, not for the right door, just for the right place.
In fact, every boy who plays basketball once hoped that a girl could run to the court to cheer for him.
I want to be a gentle person, but gentleness has depreciated.
Fifty-eight, I don't know who I love most if I'm not drunk, and I don't know who I love most if I'm not sick.
Fifty-nine, focus interview dare to say no to that year! Today I reported how cold it was this winter. Through painstaking in-depth investigation, I exposed and criticized the widespread phenomenon of sudden drop in temperature at present, and boldly predicted that it might be particularly cold or not so cold this winter.
Who hasn't met two scum when he was young?
Sixty-one, I will cry when I am sad and laugh when I grow up.
Sixty-two, I wanted to eat my sorrow in one gulp, but I became fat in one gulp.
Sixty-three, I'm going to shoot a girl who hasn't been chased by us in those years. I don't believe it.
Sixty-four, you are nothing special, but your face is strong enough.
Sixty-five, can you play dazzle dance? Don't! Can you play CS? Don't! Can you play DNF? No. Then go to hell! What kind of game is that?
Sixty-six, like you, at this age, you have fallen below the issue price.
Sixty-seven, in Egypt, a man can marry four wives, that is how tired, or China.
Sixty-eight, what is happiness? Happiness is that cats eat fish, dogs eat meat, and Altman hits small monsters!
Yesterday at noon, I received a short message: Please deposit the money into this account XXX. I'll come back in half an hour: I have credited 5000 yuan, please check it. The next day, I received: I have been to the bank three times, you liar.
Seventy, there were Ximen Qing in ancient times and Edison Chen today; The stream sees the stream and takes out its own camera.
Time is not the time to get up, but how long you can sleep.
Seventy-two, sadness turns left, and happiness comes.
Seventy-three, after breaking up, I don't want anything. I just hope that every woman in your future is not as good as one.
Seventy-four, I want the world to know that I am very low-key.
Seventy-five, the tortoise can beat the rabbit, but actually it just goes its own way.
Don't tell jokes at the seaside, it will make the sea laugh.
Some people, death doesn't matter to me. Some people, I can't let go of them.
Seventy-eight, once I was in the street, a group of girls stopped me. They said I was handsome, but when I denied it, they hit me and called me hypocritical.
After all, I can't outrun that BMW, so I can only watch it go away in the sunset. It's not that my engine is broken, but that my chain has fallen off.
At eighty, the little sunflower mother started work, and the child's cough has been bad, mostly abandoned.
If you can't tolerate me, it means that either your mind is too narrow or my personality is too great.
Eighty-two, one day, I will have the right to kill all the dogs in the world that fail me. . .
Eighty-three, it's not that I don't care, but that I care too much and want you to be happy. Even if you are imprisoned, pretend not to care.
Eighty-four, white horse, where did you die! Did you lose your prince and dare not come to see me?
85. The only highlight of watching the premiere of Titanic last night was that when Rose took off halfway, the camera suddenly switched and the audience said in unison: Grass!
Eighty-six, the ideal of meat, the life of cabbage.
I didn't take the initiative to find you, not because you are not important, but because I don't know if I am important or not.
Eighty-eight, the sky is boiled.
Eighty-nine, not afraid of stealing tools, but afraid of stealing children to understand technology!
90. God, please let me grow five centimeters taller, and I am willing to lose ten pounds. . .
9 1. The tortoise can beat the rabbit, but in fact it just goes its own way.
Ninety-two, dear! Do you miss me? Did you dream about me last night? Yes That's great. Then I will ask Yan for leave and come back to see you tonight.
93. Handsome is useless! Finally, I was eaten by a chess piece!
Ninety-four, lost in memory, black and blue; Looking back suddenly, it is unsightly.
95. I am a fat man, not a clown.
Nobody wants me except you. I just don't want anyone except you.
97. Who said I was white, thin and beautiful? I will be good friends with him.
98. Doing nothing is no fun.
Ninety-nine, accumulated over time, may lead to an outbreak; And if it breaks out for a long time, it may lead to collapse.
One hundred, failure is not terrible, the key is to see whether it is successful or not.
101. I really want to control your grandfather's crying myself: Dad!
There is a slacker who doesn't want to get up around every alarm clock.
Why are all the handsome guys in the barber shop and all the beautiful women in the red light district?
One hundred and fifty, in this world, it is more difficult to kill Q pet than to kill a person.
Do you know that sometimes your casual words will affect my mood all day?
107. If you don't break out in silence, you will die in silence.
The difficulty of marriage is that we love each other's advantages, but live with her shortcomings.
My advantages are: I am handsome; But my shortcoming is that I am not handsome.
1 10. In order to drive a Land Rover, you have to endure hardships. If you don't work hard, you can only drive Li Xia.
1 1 1. When I grow up, I will marry the Tang Priest. If I can play, I will eat him.
What if I have a husband? With the goalkeeper, the goal was scored.
113. Women have countless QQ numbers just to flirt with a man. Men often use one QQ number to fill in all kinds of women.
I will come to you in my next life, because you are the stupidest except me.
Only when there is a long queue at the railway station can we really realize that we are descendants of the dragon.
Men like fashionable women and don't like gossiping women.
I want to buy things when I'm angry. When I buy things, I have to spend money. When I spend money, my money becomes less. I get angry when I have little money.
118, it's all from the heart. I read the medical records. I can't even imagine a doctor.
1 19. It is easy to stand outside the pain and convince the suffering people.
One hundred and twenty years, the language is not amazing.
One, two, one, there is a kind of base, boasting about the scar and forgetting the pain.
122, don't take a person's past, to doubt a person's nature.
One hundred and twenty-three, life is only three days, and people who live in yesterday are confused; Those who live in tomorrow wait; People who live in the present are the most practical.
There are two ways to pollute a place: garbage or money!
125. Men like popular women.
126, face is given by others, face is lost.
One hundred and twenty-seven, I can't find it anywhere, and I still sigh at Xiao Yao. Idle hate, a suit of fat.
Your mobile phone is cheaper than the phone bill.
Very philosophical humorous mood phrases
Very philosophical humorous mood phrases
1. You should know that the future of Telunsu will not be too bright, so we don't have to be so pure.
Fortunately, pigs, unfortunately, people. I am a lucky unfortunate, at least I sleep like a pig.
Excuse me, which Chinese teacher teaches you math? If you can't be a bad guy, you must be a good guy who tickles the bad guys.
Your advantage is that it's useless when it's critical.
Promise Chairman Mao that I will never pinch the flowers of my motherland again. I can pinch flowers and bones.
6. I think going to school to copy homework every morning will enrich my life.
7. Go on, don't spoil the word youth, you are already in beginning of autumn.
8. In order to find out the cause of insomnia yesterday, I have insomnia again today.
9. No one will give you a step, so move a chair yourself.
10. If your heart is not like the sea, how can you have a career like the sea?
1 1. Those eyes that shook when I was young, ten years later, there are still several pairs that are crazier than love-lovelorn.
12. Don't be afraid of temptation. You resist, which means you are a good person. Resisting failure shows that you used to be a good man with one heart and one mind. If you pretend to be two people, then you are not alone. Don't rob me. Although I can't play coquetry, I can play wrestling.
13. You are the flattest woman in the world that I have ever seen. You are not an airport. You are simply a basin. I devoted my most perfect years to compulsory education. A woman has two mouths, one for telling lies and the other for eating people.
14. Travel is from one's own place to another.
15. Whenever the charge sounded, I quickly hid in the ditch, because: I am undercover. The difficulty of marriage is that we love each other's advantages, but live with her shortcomings.
16. The so-called love story is that you say something that you don't even believe, but hope that the other person will believe that you can't get broadband after buying a computer, just like eating when you have enough wine and meat.
17. Some men are as smart and changeable as the weather. Some women are as stupid as the weather forecast. She can't see the change of the weather. In fact, the day shift is short, and the computer passes as soon as it is turned on and off.
18. Love is art, marriage is technology, and divorce is arithmetic.
19. Phoenix rebirth is nirvana, and pheasant rebirth is corpse change.
20. When you stumble and become a cripple, you turn around and flash your waist.
2 1. I am the ideal of pork, and the life of cabbage will always be vinegar. I want to be stewed again.
22. There is no doubt that I am your dream lover.
23. Come on, do you want to die or not? It is really rare in the world to uncover the veil of one's own nature and face the reality of nature.
24. Forget all the knowledge learned in school, and the rest is quality.
25. Oh, you are too busy to go to the toilet by yourself. You are not afraid to look for bones in eggs, but you are afraid that he must look for eggs in bones.
I am poor, and so are my servants, gardeners and drivers.
27. The Internet is like a prison. You stole a wallet in, but you know everything when you go out.
28. Not knowing is sad, and not wanting to know is even more sad.
29. But in a blink of an eye, everything has become the past.
30. Half of life is bad luck, and the other half is how to deal with it.
3 1. There are only two kinds of men: one is lascivious and the other is very lascivious. Do you think that ghosts with single eyelids are horrible, or do you think that people with double eyelids spend their whole lives looking back on their youth, and they have to spend their whole lives doubting the most powerful thing about their sister's life, that is, they can be rogue artists without alcohol and tobacco.
32. It is not difficult to find a job, and it is not difficult to find a boyfriend. If you can't support people by working, change your mind and let men support you.
33. Some old men are lustful, thinking that young girls are short of money to spend textbooks. After the exam, I mentioned that I was definitely a nerd. In the past, when we talked about friends, we first asked others if they had any friends. Now we have to ask others if they are gay.
34. I have never been reduced to an excellent college student, relying on my strong quality. I won't bend over if money falls from the sky, because even pies won't fall, let alone money.
If the children in this country have lost their innocence, then the future of this country must be unimaginative.
36. Looks are not important, what matters is that you are not beautiful. Don't lift yourself so high, or you will fall and die. Beauty can only be used to deceive men, and cleverness can be used to deceive the world.
37. You are dressed like this. Are you dissatisfied with the world? Be careful when brushing your teeth in the future. No more mouthwash. Speaking is not necessarily better than singing. But singing must be worse than talking.
38. It is said that women are made of water, but the water pollution is so serious recently. You say you are my friend, but I know that animals are indeed friends of human beings.
39. People inside the wall want to come out, people outside the wall want to go in, and I stand on the wall and watch.
40. Donor, put down the butcher's knife and become a Buddha and shave your head.
4 1. Live in the coldest water and try not to drown.
42. Hey, don't put your worthless face in front of me, thank you.
43. I made so many mistakes that I don't know where I made them now.
We women are the only flowers in the world, where can we get so much cow dung? Being stared at by beautiful women requires more psychological quality than being watched by ugly women all day. Every time I miss you, it is a grain of sand, so there is Sahara in the world.
45. You are not Lin Daiyu. Don't be as sad as others.
46. There are even hot and cold jokes. Who doesn't know humor?
47. I have lived to this age. Only chopsticks can convince others' ears with their mouths. Only action can conquer other people's hearts. How can I know what is the best money and what it is? It's something I don't have Memory is not a sign that a person is getting old, but repeated memory is.
48. One person lives, two people live and three people live to death.
49. I shook my head hard and my wig was thrown out.
50. Actually, I don't like loneliness at all. Why do you always come to me?
5 1. Man struggles upwards as long as he is not afraid of dying on Mount Everest.
52. Classmate, I will return the two tea eggs I owe you next semester. I will always be a poor bug, and I will never escape the early bird.
53. Fifty cents and fifty cents are the happiest, because they make up a piece.
54. Brushing your teeth is a mixed blessing. Cup in one hand and washing utensils in the other.
55. Teachers always like to say: Students, please look at me.
56. Protect yourself and love others. Please don't come out in the middle of the night to scare people.
57. Play a little mahjong and have a spicy meal. Find a small object, life is like this.
58. If the sky is affectionate, it will die young and great, and it will die under the flowers.
59. Your altitude is so high that I can't climb it after all.
60. Love can make people live forever, but the person who said this is dead.
6 1. I looked at the sky and longed for a piece of pie, but I waited for a long time and came with a piece of bird droppings.
62. Sir, you look like my next boyfriend. You cured a blind man that day. When he saw you, he begged you to make him blind again.
63. It is not that good medicine tastes bitter. Why have you never seen an effective virus fall in love with my computer? I can only help some of them keep their eyes on themselves, so that they will look down on me before long. Why bother me? Don't think that meeting me is your fate, maybe it's your hurdle.
64. Stop staring at me. Living is not the last word, living and working hard is the truth.
65. Don't talk to me, I will only treat what you say as worthless. The most painful thing is lovelorn, and the most uncomfortable thing is insomnia.
66. Life is like a coffee table, always full of cups.
67. Being single is not guilty, but making others single is guilty.
68. It is because of my low profile that your high profile has been achieved.
69. Planting grass won't make people lie down. Why don't you plant cactus? Who can tell me who the other half is? I thanked his ancestors for their last confession. I was ill for a few days.
70. It was amazing at first, and only the world saw it.
7 1. Your beautiful long hair always hurts my face. I am ugly, but I am not as free as you.
72. On the road of love, I always stop and go. My mother said that my legs and feet were not good. If she dares to steal money today, she will dare to steal others tomorrow. This is a one-step operation.
You can lie to me once, but please don't doubt my IQ and lie to me again and again.
74. Is it because I'm so radiant that you talk nonsense and suddenly see your shadow with a Chinese pencil? Take a closer look. Oh, I need to gain weight so that I can bear the pain you have given me.
75. In class, the teacher suddenly said, don't talk when you sleep, but wake up when you talk. My family was poor when I was a child. I can't afford a bike, so I go to school by taxi every day.
76. Grandpa said: I watched the news broadcast for decades, but I didn't see the finale.
77. What is hateful is not mistress, but a little beggar who can't stand the temptation of mistress.
78. There are three treasures in lies: everlasting, everlasting, and love till you are old; There are three treasures in Korean dramas: car accidents, cancer and incurable diseases. The most hateful thing is not the commercial break, but the ending song after the commercial. You can stop cursing! Once you scold, you curse death. Your eyes are black and your heart is red. But the eyes turned black and there was a red heart.
79. If you wear a mask for too long, you will want to take it off again when it grows on your face, unless it hurts your bones and muscles.
80. Don't wait for people who shouldn't wait, and don't break our hearts. We all do it for a living.
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