Who knows the lines for Jiang Kun's cross talk about "escape from death"?

Lines for escaping from the tiger's mouth:

A: I went to the zoo on Sunday, and played with the tigers in the lion and tiger mountain. I was looking at something interesting, and I don't know who was evil, and while I was going

The crowd crowded forward and cheered, "The tiger is out of the mountain!". You--just squeeze me out of here.

B: Oh, is it broken?

A: I’m not afraid of anything if I fall. If I break my arm or my leg, I can still do what I do when I go to the hospital to pick him up. But this place doesn’t work well, no

This is a place for people to stay!

B: Oh, I fell into the tiger’s cave!

A: I looked up and saw a big tiger lying down not far away. I was so scared that my voice changed, oh...oh, my God!

B: Why do you call the tiger mom?

A: Call me mom? You can’t even call me grandma, it’s time to play! The young man weighs more than 120 pounds, and the bones and meat are just like a tiger’s lunch.

That’s it.

B: Don’t be anxious and think of a solution slowly.

A: My head is so big, I secretly glanced at the tiger, it was really good.

B: Didn’t the tiger see you?

A: You are exchanging feelings with me!

B: Huh? Staring at you!

A: As soon as the tiger glared at me, my head suddenly became excited, and many heroic images emerged.

B: Still a hero!

A: I looked up and saw many people above looking at me. We are young people of this era. We cannot embarrass young people when so many people fall into the trap of a tiger. In the past, did you listen to the Peking Opera Wu Song Fighting the Tiger?

B: Okay.

A: Okay, that’s fake. Today, I’ll practice it for real. It will really open your eyes.

B: Want to hunt a tiger?

A: Hey!

B: You are really good.

A: What can you do?

B: That’s a good idea.

A: That’s a good idea. You need to be able to stand up on your legs. This is what I thought at the time.

B: What are you considering?

A: We have all received legal education. Do you know there is an animal protection law?

B: I know.

A: Whoever kills the tiger will be sentenced to two years in prison.

B: Your legal concept is quite strong.

A: Who do you think made this law? Co-author: I break the law by hunting tigers. The tiger eats me for free.

B: That person is here to protect wild animals.

A: You protect women and children, but why do you protect wild animals?

B: Then we must protect it too.

A: I am just thinking about it, but the situation above is in chaos.

B: Oh?

A: Here comes someone! Help people quickly! Someone fell into the tiger's hole!

B: Oh!

A: There are still people cheering me up. Hey, hold on, buddy! When I hear something, hold on? What kind of place is this? Can I survive it? You guys

It really doesn’t hurt your back to stand and talk. Come down and stand for a while and let me take a look.

B: Aren’t they worried about you?

A: It can’t be so chaotic. An old man shouted to me.

B: Ah.

A: Child! You need a guy to kill a tiger. Come and throw my walking stick to you.

B: A walking stick!

A: A sister-in-law asked me, brother, do you want a knife? Sister-in-law has a fruit knife here!

B: Look at these two weapons.

A: This idea is to throw bricks in and let me step on them to climb up.

B: Oh.

A: The one who suggested throwing a cigarette away asked me to take a puff to cheer me up. There is an old lady who is really kind-hearted.

B: Oh.

A: He is so kind-hearted that he sheds tears.

B: Yes.

A: Climb on the edge and shout to me, my child, give you a pen, write down what you have to say first.

B: This old lady is really interesting.

A: No one came out to organize, even if a temporary rescue team was set up first.

B: Then there is no time.

A: Do the thrown fruit knives and walking sticks work?

B: These two weapons are close to killing a tiger.

A: The tiger is just lazy. What should I do? Stab the tiger with a walking stick?

B: No, no price, I have to stab the tiger to regain its energy.

A: Let’s talk about the look in the eyes of the old man above. Look at the place where the walking stick was thrown, right behind the tiger’s butt. I’ll grab the tiger’s tail once it’s enough.

On the chin...

B: Ouch, please don’t move.

A: Don’t move after thinking about it.

B: Hey.

A: That’s what the old lady said.

B: Huh?

A: While my mind is still clear, let me leave you with a few words.

B: Do you really want to write it?

A: I am also a big boss.

B: Young people of our time!

A: The fortune teller said that I am 28 years old, and this is the year I will have a big disaster.

B: Phew!

A: I have celebrated my birthday a few days ago, and I am still beautiful!

B: The disaster is over.

A: It’s hard to figure it out today. They probably calculated it for me based on the lunar calendar.

B: Haha!

A: I can hide from the second grade, but I can’t hide from the fifteenth grade.

B: Yeah.

A: If I have to leave a few words, I would blame my mother.

B: What’s bothering your mother?

A: Just talk about me.

B: What’s wrong?

A: The people next to me saw that I was quite tall, so they took a tape measure and measured me at 1.65 meters.

B: 1.65 meters is fine.

A: You said it’s okay, but the girls I’m dating don’t agree with me.

B: What’s wrong?

A: One of my partners thought I was too young.

B: Ouch.

A: You said that if I have a partner, can I come here to watch tigers and play on Sundays?

B: Then why can’t you come?

A: Why not? You boys who are hooking up with each other, talk about it, you guys are hooking up with each other, and on Sunday, who doesn’t go to your mother-in-law’s house to do the work?

B: Is that so?

A: Is that so? ! Let me tell you, since our second oldest child started dating, my mother-in-law’s family no longer hires a nanny!

B: So you are willing to be this nanny?

A: Working as a nanny is not life-threatening.

B: That’s true.

A: I can’t meet the big tiger! After we finish our work, can we still fall in love? Do you go to the zoo when you are in love and go to the park? What is the park like?

Before the flowers and under the moon, what are you talking about there? It’s so tasteful; what do you smell about the zoo? It’s fishy and foul. You just have this taste, why are you talking about affecting your mood?

B: Did you fall into a tiger's hole because you don't have a partner?

A: It doesn’t matter if you don’t have a partner. You grow taller and I will grow taller. I can see everything clearly. Why should I squeeze forward?

What? This is good, I can see really clearly, I can even see a few of the tiger's beards.

B: This opportunity is really rare for you.

A: I’ll give you a chance.

B: I don’t dare.

A: Just leave a few words and complain about my mother. We don’t want to hire the elderly. I won’t say it.

B: Please leave a few words for the unit.

A: What do you say?

B: Yeah.

A: Dear leaders and masters, I went out to play on Sunday and accidentally let the tiger eat me.

B: The actual situation.

A: It’s all my fault. I’m not very organized and disciplined, I’m free and undisciplined, and I didn’t fully estimate the consequences of a tiger eating me.

B: It’s impossible to estimate.

A: Why should I check if I’m already dead? Forget it, if you die, just die. Anyway, I haven't died once since I was a child.

B: Ha.

A: Let’s be tougher when talking to the leader this time.

B: Oh.

A: Let’s tell him, I’ll give you as much pension as you like. We won’t cheat you or blackmail you. Work-related injuries don’t count. At most, you’ll get one.

Death.

B: I think it’s just the same thing.

A: Why can’t such a big boy play well? If he has to be eaten by a tiger, he probably won’t be able to recognize anything.

B: I can’t ratify you!

A: I was just thinking about it here, and everyone above gave me some advice.

B: Yes.

A: This one says, hey, young man, the tiger is quite honest, let us think of a way to wait a little longer!

B: Ah.

A: The one said, hey, someone has found a zookeeper for you! There is also a young man here who comes up with an idea, "Come on, come on, guys"

Shout slogans to me and try to scare the tiger away. One, two, three, fight the tiger! One, two, three , fight the tiger! "It scared me. Stop shouting,

Stop shouting, you are trying to wake up the tiger! If you want to shout slogans, I will do it.

B: Are you shouting?

A: I am close, it can hear clearly! Really, one, one, two, three, four, five, go up the mountain and hunt the tiger. The tiger doesn't eat, it only eats the big bad guys.

B: All the children’s songs are out.

A: Up here, shouting slogans doesn’t work, the tigers can’t understand. Hey, you guys really have heroic spirit. Come down here.

B: How many people should you ask to come down?

A: So what?

B: People have to feed the tigers when they come down.

A: Feeding the tiger is called sacrificing oneself to save others. If you die well, you will be able to be published in newspapers and so on; if I die, it doesn’t matter, I fed the tiger.

No value at all.

B: No, no, no, you can be in the newspaper even if you die.

A: No more than two sentences should be published in the newspaper.

B: Which two sentences?

A: A young worker accidentally fell into a tiger's mouth and died while visiting the park. The relevant departments reminded tourists to pay attention to safety. Listen, you didn’t even register my name.

I am a complete negative example.

B: Do you still want to be a positive person?

A: What’s going on?

B: You’ve been thinking about it for so long. Nothing works at all.

A: Don’t worry, you can let me discuss it with Tiger.

B: Discuss? ．

A: Hey, Tiger, Tiger, just take a nap. Hey, open your eyes and look at me. I’m quite skinny. If you want to eat, there is a very fat Tang Jiezhong in our unit.

B: Why are you always thinking about me?

A: Even if I let it get up, we won’t really send it away.

B: You.

A: Tiger, tiger, if you don’t bite me, I promise, I promise I won’t bite you either!

B: The truth.

A: If you let me out, I will live well. We listen to the leaders and do our jobs well; at home, we honor our parents and respect our brothers and sisters;

When we come out, we abide by the traffic rules. Spitting.

B: What a mess.

A: Don’t look at the mess. You may not be able to remember it at this time.

B: Ouch, you are still proud of this.

A: What’s wrong?

B: You are trying to find a way out now.

A: Find a way to get out? Easy for you to say! What is this place? This is a place where tigers are kept. Even tigers can’t get out. Can I get out?

B: Yes.

A: Look at this wall, it’s more than three meters high, and it doesn’t have any strength at all. How was it originally designed? There was no elevator.

B: Never heard of it.

A: Hey, what are you guys thinking? What? Find me the administrator of the zoo. The administrator has Sunday off. He has a rest.

The tiger doesn’t rest! Please call the police quickly, call 110, 119, fire police, police, etc. What? After searching for a long time, there was no phone nearby. The leader of the zoo was too picky to call. You all go, you go out of the zoo and take the trackless train to the TV station. Find a camera crew at the TV station to film how the tiger eats me.

B: Why are you taking this photo?

A: Make a movie about tigers eating people and sell it to foreigners. Earn some foreign exchange and make some contribution to the Seventh Five-Year Plan before you die!

B: Your consciousness is quite high.

A: You said that I have been thinking about it for a long time. This tiger is just panting without opening its eyes. You move and I make gestures with it.

B: Ah.

A: Hum, hum, I don’t dare to move even if it doesn’t move.

B: Trouble.

A: Has the tiger degenerated?

B: This tiger cannot degenerate.

A: How did you know?

B: In order to keep the wild nature of tigers in other zoos——

A: Huh?

B: He often throws live chickens and rabbits into the tiger's cave.

A: Why throw away live chickens and rabbits?

B: Training tigers to catch live food.

A: Ouch! Capture live food.

B: Especially on Sunday.

A: Ah.

B: They will also starve the tiger to a meal.

A: It’s broken! Today is Sunday, and the tiger hasn’t eaten yet, so it’s time to catch me as live food. This abominable zoo, I will never be done with them after I die.

B: Let them check it carefully.

A: Check!

B: This will not happen next time.

A: Isn’t this the same next time? Brother, let’s just forget it. What’s going on? The size of my life is a matter of life.

B: Ah.

A: After my death, the director of the zoo was dismissed, the administrator inspected, and his bonus was deducted for six months! Just as I was thinking of this, a girl's silver bell-like voice suddenly came from above: "Hey, big guy, please take off your belt quickly, twist it into a rope and pull the young man up!"

B: This Good idea.

A: I burst into tears when I heard it. What a great idea: I looked up and, oh, there was a call for more than thirty people to take off their belts.

What a great style. Look at this girl wearing a green skirt and untying a yellow skirt belt. Hum, hum, this girl is so beautiful.

B: It’s already this time, but you still have this thought.

A: No, no, you said that a girl stepped forward to save a complete stranger at such a critical moment, does that mean that the girl

——to me Interesting?

B: You are too evil.

A: How are you talking? Then tell me about that girl, there were so many young men standing around her, why didn’t she look at anyone, but she just stood aside and looked at me alone?

B: Nonsense. Who told you to fall into the tiger's hole? If she doesn't look at you, who will she look at?

A: No matter what you say, I guess you can’t tell the size from the top down.

Ahem, maybe my marriage is a blessing in disguise. Oops, usually heroes save beauties, but today beauties save heroes, ahem.

B: Stop talking! How long has it been since then, and you still have someone you want to date?

A: Why are you staring? Why don't you have any sympathy at all? As the saying goes, a gentleman talks but doesn't do anything. I didn't use my words or my hands, so I moved my mind and I was about to die. Why do you call me so real!

B: Come on, just do your thing.

A: Soon enough, thirty belts were twisted into ropes, and they came down smoothly. I looked up, oh, more than thirty people were carrying them

The pants are looking at me. With so many people looking at me, I cannot embarrass so many people.

B: Yeah.

A: This foot hooked over the old man’s walking stick, and this hand used the fruit knife that my sister-in-law gave me. This is called knowing clearly that there are tigers in the mountains, but preferring to go to the tiger mountains.

B: Hoo!

A: There is a red sun in the chest.

B: Yeah!

A: Dancing in the east wind at your feet, daring to compete with the evil tiger, not giving in to the demon, grief and anger turning into the power of recovery, fighting the tiger will have its successors! As soon as I exerted my strength, alas - I stood up!

B: You have been sitting down there!

A: What nonsense are you talking about? My legs are so weak. If I don’t sit down, why would I lie down?

B: Climb quickly!

A: As soon as I saw the rope, it was right in front of me. Bang, I grabbed it, and in a few steps, I came to the middle. As the saying goes, a dog can jump over the wall when it is anxious.

When a person is anxious, his energy is not too small. One step, two steps, three steps, four steps, this is called energy. Hey, you said that climbing Mount Everest is followed by a big tiger.

Isn’t it true that everyone can climb it?

B: You are talking nonsense again.

A: I looked back and saw that the tiger had just opened one eye, hehe, this is called victory in sight, my buddy has won! Goodbye, friend, goodbye, friend

Goodbye, friend, goodbye, friend...

B: Forget it.

A: Goodbye Tiger, I won’t come here again. You can starve here alone. You are lonely enough. The zoo leader also

I don't care about you, don't be busy, wait for your buddy to go out, and help you introduce a tigress.

B: You are still talking nonsense.

A: When there was movement above, I kicked my legs and rubbed them, telling you that I was out.

B: Ah, you are saved.

A: The crowd cheered and I kept getting confused, ouch.

B: You are quite frightened this time.

A: After coming up, I remembered a key question.

B: What else comes to mind?

A: Where are the girl’s skirt strings? Here, quickly untie it and hold it to your chest like a garland. Scared, with the girl's body temperature,

With the girl's fragrance, with...

B: Stop smelling it, it will still smell like sweat if you smell it again.

A: No matter what you say, try to get in front of the girl and give her a golden pearl first! I quickly ran towards the girl.

B: Why are you so anxious?

A: I don’t have a partner yet, so I can’t help but be anxious.

B: Everyone saved you like this, why don’t you thank everyone first?

A: I’m so dumb, can I speak?

B: Please shake hands with everyone first.

A: None of them shake my hand.

B: Why?

A: They all have their pants pulled up!